82: We need consent, we've got discontent
Mike and Matt get stuck into the week's news including the fallout of the shocking death of George Floyd, US policing and racial tensions, the reaction of President Trump and the ongoing protests taking place across the USA. Other topics include food poisoning, the latest goings-on in Westminster, potential positives in the fight against coronavirus (but will we learn anything from it?), the hi...
39m Jun 04, 2020
39m
81: The perfect accompaniment for a day trip to Durham
Mike and Matt discuss Dominic Cummings' actions in the reasoned and measured way they've virtually made their trademark at this point - did he flout the regulations? Was he in the wrong? Or is it all just one big game? Also today they share their feelings about the coronavirus pandemic now that the first wave appears to be settling down - when will life go back to normal? Other topics include T...
41m May 28, 2020
41m
80: Health and wealth
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly discuss: the heat, being trapped in lockdown, your own kids taking liberties, Captain Tom, the clap for the NHS, Shoreditch, the pedestrianisation of London city centre, social-distancing, do-gooders, cycling to work, international travel, when clubs and bars might reopen, Michael Jordan and his extreme wealth and why a sense of achievement doesn't have to be financia...
41m May 21, 2020
41m
79: Skinny and wriggly
Better late than never, Mike Graham (via studio) and Matt Kelly (via phone) are back in time for the weekend. They discuss: country life, the next steps of lockdown, shooting a gun, David Mamet movies, the complexities of the coronavirus crisis, being stuck inside with the same person, the antiquated art of cashing cheques, Alan Clark MP, the dearth of interesting ministers, Priti Patel's where...
35m May 15, 2020
35m
78: One big (un)happy family
Mike and Matt are back to help relieve some lockdown boredom as we enter week seven! Today's news and views include: the stress of being housebound and seeing too much (or too little) family, the broadband situation in Norfolk (spoiler: it's bleak), Nigel Farage's behaviour, preparing to coexist with the virus, how newspapers functioned before the Internet, Hugh Grant and the hooker, Mark Di St...
33m May 06, 2020
33m
77: Easing restrictions? Don't bet on it
Mike and Matt are back to help relieve the lockdown boredom as they get stuck into the week's political news. The reappearance of Boris Johnson, never taking a day off work, the unhealthy nature of the gambling industry, why Las Vegas is not all it's cracked up to be, being fleeced by energy companies, projections on when restrictions might be lifted, and Alaskan cruises are the cards being dea...
38m Apr 28, 2020
38m
76: Just don't upset the dog
Mike and Matt return to deliver the most biting comment and opinion on the week's news as you've come to expect by now. The unfair dismissal claim against Priti Patel, income tax demands, the latest chapter in the farcical Harry & Meghan story, lockdown frustrations (especially for the pets) and the tough environment for journalists are the items on the docket.  Subscribe from your favourite po...
35m Apr 21, 2020
35m
75: Keep your bloody distance
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly reconvene as coronavirus-related lockdown continues to discuss the impact social distancing measures may have on kids, the idiots who are taking to the streets despite warnings and how other countries are dealing more severely with flouting offenders. There's also room for other matters such as the latest Labour gaffe, not being a local in an area full of locals, bein...
35m Apr 15, 2020
35m
74: Home truths
Mike and Matt are back via long distance communication as we enter week 3 of lockdown. But what will the other side look like after we're through with the coronavirus crisis? What tips do the Thought Police have for entertaining yourself while shacked up at home? And what do they most miss about normal life? Find out here. Also up for discussion are Peter Hitchens, Marco Pierre White, MG's new ...
36m Apr 07, 2020
36m
73: The lockdown low-down
Despite location restrictions, Mike Graham (in studio) and Matt Kelly (self-isolating at home - via phone) still manage to come together for a meeting of minds as they discuss the latest goings on with the coronavirus pandemic. How will the world operate on the other side? Why do certain people change their behaviour so dramatically during times like these? How have the government reacted? And ...
37m Mar 31, 2020
37m
72: Whining and dining
Matt and Mike discuss MG's recent illness, being useless around the house, lackadaisical handymen, mixed dining experiences, posh party invites and gin.  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Mike is: @IROMG and Matt can be found via his publication: @TheNewEuropean. New episodes are available to download every Tuesday and Thursday so subscribe from your favourite podcast provider so...
44m Mar 19, 2020
44m
71: Going viral
You'll never guess what dominates the Thought Police today...it's the virus none of us can escape from and it's led to some of the most unusual and bizarre circumstances ever witnessed in human history (including certain behaviours!). Mike and Matt philsophise about just how exceptional this situation is and how it may be remembered including the ghostly nature of the empty streets, the devasta...
40m Mar 17, 2020
40m
70: TPQs (Fifth Edition) - Answer Time
Mike and Matt answer more of your questions from the mailbox including how to revamp our politics, the spread of coronavirus, what form a Thought Police live show might take and more. Matt also shares the challenges faced by losing your eyesight and being left-handed and Mike expresses his love for YouTube and disdain for arch-feminists.  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Mike is...
39m Mar 12, 2020
39m
69: Running around like a headless chicken
Mike and Matt are back for more topical chat. The spread of covid-19 dominates the conversation as it does the conscience but there are plenty of other subjects and tangents including tone deaf tweeters, Jolyon Maugham, people who panic for no reason, keeping chickens, the RSPCA, travelling on the bus, turning 60 and why "Mugabe" was innocent.    Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP....
39m Mar 10, 2020
39m
68: Plagued by problems
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly discuss the coronavirus, American English, fast driving, road accidents, dead geckos, giant fish, locusts and ducks.  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Mike is: @IROMG and Matt can be found via his publication: @TheNewEuropean New episodes are available to download every Tuesday and Thursday so subscribe from your favourite podcast provider so you never...
32m Mar 05, 2020
32m
67: Home discomforts
Mike and Matt are back on top form...for now(!) as they catch up on a busy week of news including Priti Patel vs. the Home Office (which leads to a long rant about the political structure in the UK), Boris' new baby and the challenges of having children later in life, the oldest man in the world, VAR in the Premier League and the impact its having on football and the story still dominating the ...
45m Mar 03, 2020
45m
66: Weirdos and freaks
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly are back from their winter break and pick up where they left off with the usual provocative mixture of news, views and life experiences. Today's topics include: Learning Spanish and the delights of Spain, the Pandora's box that is the Twittersphere (and why you are better off leaving it - and them - behind), social media's impact on modern politics, the validity of th...
33m Feb 25, 2020
33m
65: Best bits of 2020 (...so far!)
Matt's had to go away for a bit, so why not enjoy the Thought Police's Best bits of 2020 so far! All the major news is covered including Brexit, Megxit and social media trolling and of course the biggest story of all #ChristmasTreegate. There's also plenty of craziness from Fleet Street and films to family and flying cars. It's all here!  The boys are back next week but if you need a bit more (...
49m Feb 18, 2020
49m
64: Behind every successful man...
More philosophical musings from Mike and Matt now as they discuss the ladies leading the leaders, the mental health of the privileged including hard done-by Harry & martyr Meghan, skilled manual work, taking a mission to the sun, whether there's life after death, the Catholic church and its nefarious practices and Phillip Schofield's sexuality announcement. They also take a very quick dip into ...
43m Feb 13, 2020
43m
63: Ciara, Corona and Camus
The commanding commentariat, Mike Graham and Matt Kelly, are back to look down on the rest of the world as they pontificate over the week's news including: the destruction caused by Storm Ciara, the UK transport network's atrocious handling of adverse weather, stunt driving experiences, The Oscars, travelling to Dubai, the wonder of IKEA, the potential of a United Ireland, Mark Thatcher, whethe...
36m Feb 11, 2020
36m
62: Having a riot
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly are here to brighten up your day as they muse over a little bit of sport and culture from over the last few days including reaction to the Super Bowl and its half time show, unmissable recent movies, Robert De Niro's renaissance, the legend of the Mafia, tear-jerking rom-coms, and steamed vaginas. Interspersed is some serious chat about the Nobel Peace Prize, Donald T...
35m Feb 06, 2020
35m
61: The parting, the partying and the part of you that wished you hadn't
Mike and Matt are back and ready to deliver some more hard hitting news and views. Topics up for discussion today include: the mood of the nation (and your co-hosts) the morning after Brexit, the struggles of working from home, observations about the restaurant business, how MG ended up enjoying a Jonas Brothers gig, the media's primitive coverage of Brexit day and what constitutes bullying in ...
39m Feb 04, 2020
39m
60: Brexit strategy
We'll soon be living in a post-Brexit world and Mike Graham and Matt Kelly are here to discuss what it might look like weeks, months and years from now in Britain and beyond. Debate includes: the inner workings of the EU, how the Norman invasion may have missed the South East, the potentially twisted future of transport at home and abroad (and the pros and cons of what might be used to power it...
30m Jan 30, 2020
30m
59: Words and pictures
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly discuss the week's news including how the media reported Kobe Bryant's death, the ongoing saga of Harry and Meghan and the upcoming Brexit deal and the benefits of leaving the EU. As you've come to expect, there's a few tangential tales from the news room including the unsung skill of being succinct, appeasing difficult editors, running cringeworthy and factually inco...
38m Jan 28, 2020
38m
58: Creature discomforts
It's a big day on The Thought Police as #wormgate reaches a conclusion and there's also an update on the life of MG's rootless outdoor Christmas Tree. Other topics up for discussion include whether to challenge or ignore someone who obnoxiously offends, celebrity bubbles, gang tourism, being the victim of crime and the intimidating world (and experiences of) fight sports. Follow the podcast on ...
33m Jan 23, 2020
33m
57: Whatever floats your boat
Mike and Matt take a closer look at the week's news including whether Big Ben should indeed bong for Brexit, the press coverage of Harry and Meghan and the long term future for the monarchy (if there is one), what's next for the House of Lords, why MG believes someone should build a ship on the Thames, the overwhelming omnipresence of the BBC and whether there's value in the licence fee and how...
39m Jan 21, 2020
39m
56: Flogging a dead seahorse
Mike and Matt unpick a few more world events as they get stuck into how you categorise people who were formerly 'Remainers', the argument for a new centre-left to challenge Labour, falling out with those who don't share your politics...or your humour, colleagues who have used and abused their power, Boris Johnson's premiership and the mysteries of the deep... Follow the podcast on Twitter: @Tho...
33m Jan 16, 2020
33m
55: Negotiating Megxit
Mike and Matt are back once again to digest the news of the week. The future of the Royal family is up in the air and the pair ponder whether the Sussexes may be the first yet not the last to go, Mike lambastes the woke generation and their propensity to milk problems, Matt informs us that you can learn a lot from Monty Don and American gardens and they both share their experiences of having to...
38m Jan 14, 2020
38m
54: Worm your way out of that
Mike and Matt discuss getting back to work, MGs car problems, the Labour party leadership race, being pansexual, what constitutes sub judice, the horrendous news agenda and the cause of the Australian fires.  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Mike Graham is: @IROMG and Matt Kelly can be found: @TheNewEuropean New episodes are available to download every Tuesday and Thursday so su...
36m Jan 09, 2020
36m
53: What have we missed?
Mike Graham and Matt Kelly return from their holidays with a bang as they discuss their action packed sojourns abroad over Christmas and take a look at the busy news agenda as 2020 rolls in. Also up for discussion today is the brutality of social media, why it's wrong to judge a holiday brochure by its cover, why you need to make sure you have an expensive bottle at the ready when you visit MG'...
35m Jan 07, 2020
35m
52: Xmas best bits 2 (The stories)
CHRISTMAS BEST OF 2: What better way to see in the New Year than to gather round for a little story time! Here are some more best bits from the Thought Police ahead of their return in 2020 for you to enjoy as Mike and Matt tell stories of mistaken identity, youthful boozing, unfortunate column titles, smuggling 'guns', the rigmarole of buying the Christmas tree and how to cleverly dupe a fearso...
41m Dec 31, 2019
41m
51: Xmas best bits 1 (Political commentary)
CHRISTMAS BEST OF 1: While the boys take a Christmas break to mull more than just wine, why not take a listen back to how Mike Graham and Matt Kelly reacted to the big political stories of the last few months including Brexit, selling the NHS, climate change, the London Bridge terror attack, the December General Election and the fractures within the Labour Party and of course...that Prince Andr...
38m Dec 24, 2019
38m
50: Episode McGarrett
It's the final Thought Police of the year and the last chance for Mike Graham and Matt Kelly to tidy up a few loose ends to round off 2019. Exciting things to come but for now enjoy conversation which covers the role of Scotland and Northern Ireland post Brexit, Christmas tree decorations, reaching a half-century of podcast episodes, Campuchia, the language of touts, festive telly, and how the ...
41m Dec 19, 2019
41m
49: The election and the rejection
It's the podcast you've been waiting for as Mike and Matt deliver all the fall out to the 2019 General Election. From Labour's poor performance, to a Boris Johnson run United Kingdom, to the countdown to Brexit - it's all in here. The pair also explain their separate encounters with Rupert Murdoch...one of which was far more dramatic than it probably should have been.    Follow the podcast on T...
39m Dec 17, 2019
39m
48: Starved of election fever
It's polling day - at last - and Mike and Matt are sick of the whole affair. On today's episode they try and predict the future without knowing what's going to happen, they bash politicians who won't give you a straight answer and they debate whether Brexit will happen. They also tangent into areas including celebrity endorsements of political campaigns, the costs of going through a divorce, tr...
32m Dec 12, 2019
32m
47: Two wise men
The election is almost upon us but before we get to it, there's some other business to dispense with. Mike and Matt discuss losing your voice, being roped in to going to the panto, buying Christmas trees, the perils of Christmas party season and Robert Kilroy Silk. What more do you need to get you in the festive spirit?  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Mike Graham is: @IROMG an...
38m Dec 10, 2019
38m
46: The Massive Election Preview
Mike and Matt return with a look at what might happen next week as the people prepare to head to the polls to decide the next Prime Minister. They discuss the shoddy state of politics in the UK and why there are so few decent candidates to vote for, while Matt  shares the details of working on an ultimately doomed project which the pair speculate could offer a hint to the future for the latest ...
39m Dec 05, 2019
39m
45: Restrain, rehabilitate or remove?
The Thought Police (Mike Graham and Matt Kelly) are quick to respond as you might expect, giving their informed assessment of the London Bridge terrorist attack as well as the justice system in the UK as a whole. They also debate the appropriate punishment for serious offenders, being Matt Kelly's neighbour and radical new ways to discourage radicalisation.   Follow the podcast on Twitter: @Tho...
39m Dec 03, 2019
39m
44: Trust, backing and time - the making of a journalist
Matt Kelly and Mike Graham are back for another sparkling edition of the Thought Police and today it's all about the changing landscape of local and national journalism. From months spent gathering information inside the walls of Buckingham Palace to days grinding away in the newsroom office, the times they are a-changing. The pair share their experiences of engaging with the community to win t...
30m Nov 28, 2019
30m
43: A fact-finding mission
There are three weeks to go until the election and it's reaching... who knows what conclusion? Mike Graham and Matt Kelly try to make sense of it all in their usual blockbusting manner while also discussing what makes successful journalism and why the Daily Mail's controversial political position was brilliant if not always favourable thanks to their highly skilled yet polarising former editor....
31m Nov 26, 2019
31m
42: Looking forward to a massive election
Independent candidates Mike Graham (@IROMG) and Matt Kelly (@TheNewEuropean) discuss all the week's political talking points at home and abroad including why the upcoming Christmas election is important but tedious and in a different Remain vs. Leave issue - this time from across the pond - whether Donald Trump can survive his impeachment hearings. PS The sound of drilling is not coming from th...
42m Nov 21, 2019
42m
41: Royally screwed
Mike and Matt drill down into the car crash TV event of the year; Emily Maitlis' interrogation of His Royal Highness, Prince Andrew. Enjoy. The sounds in the background are not the sounds of the Prince digging himself out of an enormous hole... Matt has the builders in! Follow the lads on Twitter: @IROMG and @TheNewEuropean while the podcast is: @ThoughtPoliceTP. Email questions or comments to:...
38m Nov 19, 2019
38m
40: TPQs (Fourth Edition) - From Graham's face to Kelly's eye
Mike and Matt dip into the mailbag and pull out a question on their best and worst business trips. Prepare for some cracking stories from around the world as well as other classic titbits such as an why MG has an intimate knowledge of Richard Madeley, why Matt Kelly has always been a bum and why you should always write down your good ideas...  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP / @...
40m Nov 14, 2019
40m
39: Father Christmas? No it must be Jeremy Corbyn
Mike and Matt return to their soapboxes to give the result of the upcoming election...or at least how it seems after the latest round of political posturing; and once they've started they can't stop as they discuss the NHS, how we treat our old people, whether to lower the voting age, Father Christmas*, terrible excuses for turning down jobs and Liverpool's relentless quest for the Premier Leag...
37m Nov 12, 2019
37m
38: The power of influence
Matt and Mike capture the zeitgeist of modern journalism as they discuss the importance of free speech, the potential purchase of the Telegraph and what it might mean, the challenges of tackling tricky issues as a media savant, the influence of social media vs. newspapers on the upcoming election and of course there are a few tangents via Fleet Street as well! Follow the podcast on Twitter: @Th...
40m Nov 07, 2019
40m
36: Remember remember the twelfth of December
Mike and Matt discuss the big stories of the week including the build up to the General Election and the first few days of campaigning, the cans and cant's of the political process, snowflake footballers, why Brendan Rodgers is a bit odd, dreaming about ministers (definitely not through choice) and the recent high profile McDonald's firing on an explosive edition of the Thought Police.  Follow ...
44m Nov 05, 2019
44m
35: The Hangover
Mike and Matt reflect on their changeable drinking habits over the years as they discuss the best ways to give up alcohol; as far as Kelly is concerned, it's all down to the right beer. MG hazily remembers some drunken Fleet Street nights and offending some Germans while Matt harps on about a hotel stay which very nearly wasn't. It's a boozy, woozy, doozy of an episode of the Thought Police.   ...
42m Oct 31, 2019
42m
34: Perception vs. reality
Mike and Matt return after a short period of illness for an in depth look at the latest news and how it's reported. Topics include Kay Burley, interviewing politicians, standing up to Terry Manners, religion not practising what it preaches and pigs in blankets.  Follow the podcast on Twitter: @ThoughtPoliceTP / @IROMG / @TheNewEuropean and if you have a question for the boys email: thoughtpolic...
38m Oct 29, 2019
38m
33: Personal issues
This episode was due to be a delve into the Thought Police mailbag (and loosely ends up that way) but actually starts out with Matt and Mike lamenting their recent #firstworldproblems including a frustrating family drama, the incompetence of car deliveries, unexpected perils of the countryside and those journalists with a ridiculous reticence to cover simple stories. It's more mixed bag than ma...
39m Oct 17, 2019
39m
32: Deal or No Deal?
With Brexit supposedly only a few days away, it's the final battle between the Remainer (Matt Kelly) and the Leaver (Mike Graham). What starts out as a critical analysis of the latest Queen's Speech (and develops into a debate about whether Brexit really means Brexit) ends with more uncertainty than ever before. Divisive, polarising and full of outrageous opinion. And that's just The Thought Po...
44m Oct 15, 2019
44m