15_margins
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[00:00:00] Hello siblings. Welcome to the Sensory Siblings Podcast. I'm your host, Louisa Shaeri, and this is beaming to you from the solar system, the liberatory framework, and unmasking unschool for creatively identified autistic folks who are seeking another way to see no and be yourself. This is a radical re-imagining of what's.

[00:00:26] Possible when we redefine ourselves from within, by unlearning who we are, not making self connection. Our goal, activating the languages of our sensory oriented perception and creating the culture shifts to activate futures and cells, it all starts within.

[00:00:47] Hey siblings, how are you doing today? I wanna talk about how to go from the margins to the center stage of your own. Life. Kind of cheesy, but I think it's a useful metaphor. I've been playing with it in my head and I'm gonna go with it. And I think it's useful to talk about something that is really about, if you imagine that your life is a stage and that there's a play on it, there's a, you know, there's an, there's an act, there's people on it.

[00:01:22] There's, you are in a theater. Your life is a stage, but you are waiting in the wings, right? And that actually, this is your life. This is your stage, this is your theater, and you are the director. You are the playwright, you are the lead actor. And yet actually what's happening is the persona that you've been told is supposed to be the lead.

[00:01:51] The way that you've been told you're supposed to be is the one who's on stage right? So the real you is waiting in the wings and all of the ideas and agendas and thoughts about how you should be are the ones that are writing this play and acting out this play. Okay? So there you are in the margins waiting for permission for you to take up that role.

[00:02:21] Of the lead actor, of the director, and of the playwright and start living your actual life. So I'm gonna pause that there. Alright. So if you're someone who pictures things in your mind, picture that, if not, play with that idea and here's where it comes from. So about a year or two, no, probably two years ago, my partner said to me, you never finish things.

[00:02:47] And it was like, what? And it was such a rude awakening and such a moment of someone who loves me telling me the truth, right? And they didn't say it in a heavy way, they just said it as a kind of passing observation. Like, did you know this? Do you know that you don't finish things? And, but it was such a shock to me because I didn't know.

[00:03:13] When I looked, when I looked at my life, when I looked at things, I'd started, when I looked at changes I was trying to make, when I looked at redecorating, I'd begun in a room. When I looked at projects, I started with my kids. When I looked at skills I was trying to learn, right? I looked at all of it and all of it was unfinished, and I was like, oh, no.

[00:03:43] I've been living my life somehow through not finishing things. Okay. And at first I was like, oh, you know, it's just, you know, creative brain. It's dopamine seeking. It's like, Ooh, what's this thing over here? I'm gonna try that for a bit. Uh, it's getting bored easily. It's just that, right. That was my first thought to myself, but it didn't land right?

[00:04:09] I was like, no, that's not it. I need to be honest what's actually going on. And what I explored is what I wanna share with you, and I wanna share the fruits of the journey that I've been on with this unfinished life that I found myself in. Okay? So when I explored it and when I got really honest with myself, what I found was a logic at play that had been there since I'd been probably.

[00:04:41] Uh, a child, right? Which was the logic of one day, one day things will be better and then I can commit to my life one day when I'm living my actual life. That is when I will complete things, and for me, completing anything has felt like. Accepting. Right. Accepting and committing to my actual life. And there have been a lot of times in the early years and in, especially in my teens and early twenties, where I didn't want to do that.

[00:05:24] Right. I was like, this isn't it. This doesn't feel good. I don't wanna be here and disassociating my way through. And so. That coping mechanism of deferring, facing how I felt and deferring being in my actual life, waiting in the wings for permission to start living it, waiting in the wings for it to get better by itself was a logic, was a way of thinking that was still playing out.

[00:05:58] And it meant that I never felt I could fully go all in. It meant that I never felt I could fully commit. This was all happening completely unconsciously, right? I wasn't aware that I wasn't finishing things, so the result of that was that I ended up with perfectionism, right? Things aren't great, so I'm gonna defer and delay finishing it until it can be perfect.

[00:06:27] It meant that I wasn't willing to follow through and finish in case what? When I finished, it still wasn't that perfect future, happy everything resolved, future thing that I'd always been sending myself off to, right? Did disassociating into. Now. I wasn't aware of any of this, but now that I was aware of it, thank you.

[00:06:54] I could do something about it where I could explore this logic, and so this is really what I want to explore today, using the metaphor of your life as a stage. Okay, so this idea that you are in the wings and that you've been taught that there's a specific play that should be on stage. There's a specific lead character that should be playing it.

[00:07:20] And the play isn't yours. The script was written by someone else. The character isn't you. And there you are in the wings waiting to start living your life, waiting to stop being yourself, waiting for permission, waiting for things to sort themselves out, waiting for someone else to write you back into your life.

[00:07:39] Okay? And of course, no one's going to do that because this is your life. This is your stage. And this isn't. And and you know, people have their own ideas. They have their own agendas, they have their own preferences for you to start living your life. What that means is you have to be willing to start making decisions that put you onto that stage so that you can start to rewrite the play.

[00:08:18] Redirect what's happening and start to find out who is my character? Who am I here to be? What is my personality? How do I do me? Who's on that stage with me? If it was me writing this and choosing what would I be doing and how would I be living? Okay, and what this unfinished weighting in the Wings Logic does.

[00:08:47] Is, it makes you make those decisions in the hypothetical, right? It makes you dream of one day. One day I'm gonna have that thing. One day I'm gonna be that person. One day I'm gonna create that life. But all it does is reinforce what is going on, which is you being passive, you not making decisions, you not being the active director of your life.

[00:09:16] Okay? So the difference between you being off stage in the wings and you being on stage is really making decisions and taking up the full agency, the agency that you have to take that first step onto the stage of your life so that you can start experiencing what your life actually is. Alright, so that you come out of that hypothetical dreaming.

[00:09:44] Waiting in the wings and you start actually experiencing, okay, what does it feel like to be in this life? What is actually going on in this play? So when you do that, when you make that decision, when you start making decisions from the role of director, from the role of playwright, from the lead actor, then you can start to say, Hey, you persona, it's time to take a break.

[00:10:11] So that the real me. I can come on stage and start living this life so I can start experiencing it for real, so I can commit and be in it no matter what it currently is. But here's the thing, the real you who's been waiting off stage is far less experienced at being on stage, has no idea how to project their voice or be calm.

[00:10:38] On stage. Right. Or how to move their body authentically with the character that, that they're actually there to be. Yeah. So for you to then make that decision means you've gotta step into that, not knowing, I don't actually know how to be myself. I don't actually know what my life should be. It means that the playwright in you has to start writing, has to start making things.

[00:11:05] Mean what you want them to mean, right? It means that the director has to start making decisions. Nope, I don't like how that looks. I don't like these characters that are with me. This is not what I would choose. Okay, so I wanna talk about how you then begin to do that. So, as I said, this is all about making decisions.

[00:11:28] Decisions are the things that take you from that hypothetical. Unfinished life, waiting in the wings, waiting for permission to taking up center stage and starting to shape the play. That is your life as you would have it. Okay, so it's decisions and decisions mean that you have to be in the muck of that work of rewriting that play of tidying up the mess that someone else decided should be on your stage.

[00:12:03] And in also the difficulty of what your actual life is, right? It means you have to process what the emotions really are, how you really feel about what's going on, and to face all of it. Okay? So first we just need to acknowledge that this is what's happening. You are waiting in the wings of your own life, okay?

[00:12:26] And being okay with this. Being okay with the fact that I've handed so much of my own power to other people. So being okay with the fact that, okay, this sucks to think that I've not been fully living my life, my stage, allowing myself to be the author of it. So being okay with that, just being what it is.

[00:12:50] Okay. You also have to be okay with how you might not know for quite a long while. What you want your play to be? Who your main character is, what you actually like, who are the other players on stage with you? How do you feel when you start seeing things from the center, right? Instead of comparing them to that hypothetical imagined future ideal.

[00:13:22] That actually isn't real. Okay. So you might find out and the finding out, like how does it feel when I start recognizing how, what I've allowed, what I've said yes to what, um, people have given me, what I've internalized. That actually isn't mine. Okay. So it's going to be messy. It's going to. Feel unfamiliar.

[00:13:49] The finding out how do I want to live isn't gonna be instant, right? It's not going to be a perfectly rehearsed play that suddenly comes on stage and everything is done okay? If you imagine a playwright working on their play is going to be a lot of messy creative first drafts. Try this, try that. It's going to be actors learning their character.

[00:14:18] It's gonna be you learn relearning. Who actually am I when I'm accepting? This is what the life I've been planted in. These are the circumstances I was born in. This is the body I have, this is the mind I have. This is what I've been given. Now what? Right. It's going to be you being the actor trying to figure out who that, figure out who that is.

[00:14:41] It's gonna be a lot of trial and error and exploring things and trying things and rehearsing and, okay, that didn't feel right. And so doing all of that, you have to be okay with that being how your experience of your life will be for a little while. Right. And when you are okay with that. When you're sufficient in that, when you're like, fine, I'm gonna face it.

[00:15:08] I know it's a mess. I know things are not right, but at least I'm on stage, right? At least I'm not off in the wings. At least I'm starting to take ownership over the decisions that I've been making that really weren't mine. So when you are okay and sufficient and. Accepting of the fact that, okay, this is gonna be messy.

[00:15:31] This isn't gonna feel comfortable, this isn't gonna look like how it will eventually look. This might confuse people when you accept that it's so much better then being off stage, right? Being in the hypothetical, watching other people's agendas play out on your stage, right? Watching your persona live your life.

[00:15:55] While there you are in the margins being completely unseen. Okay? So decisions are the process, and this means that you make a decision and then the real stuff comes up, right? The decision is to step into your life, step onto that stage. You bump your knee. What's this? Okay, someone left this prop here.

[00:16:18] This wasn't part of my plan. This is not what I would choose. I've gotta deal with that. Okay? And now I go over here and, alright, here's this character. How come I let them in my life? How come they've been, how come they're responding to me as if I'm this person and in this play? And when actually that's not who I am and now I've got to correct things.

[00:16:42] Okay? It means you're actually in the thick of your life doing it for real. It's gonna feel messy. It's gonna be very different from that fantasy version. From that delayed one day, I will imagined future. When you are thinking that passively, something will just magically fix things, okay? When when you step on your stage, it means that things actually get fixed.

[00:17:08] It might feel bad. It might mean you have to face your actual feelings, right? I didn't actually like this. I didn't want this. This is not part of the plan. This is not. What I'm here to do. And so you have to bring those feelings onto stage with you, right? Bring them out of the shadows to admit, this is how I really feel.

[00:17:31] Bring it all out into the light of your own awareness, right? And, and love what is love. All of those parts. Why am I feeling this? What is this part of me that I've been ignoring? How do I really feel. Let me get to work. So the confidence to be on stage to fully live your life out loud, fully expressed to find out who that is, can only start happening when you start making those decisions that come from you.

[00:18:05] Taking ownership of what play is going, is playing out in your life. Okay? So the quality of those decisions comes from. The way that you are thinking about yourself, the narrative, the story that's going on in you. So it means that you have to start being willing to write that play, right? To start deciding intentionally what does this mean, and to look at what, what the thoughts are.

[00:18:32] What is the story that's playing out? What thoughts have I received about myself that I don't want to, I don't want to think anymore. Whose thoughts am I listening to? Am I listening to that heckler at the back of the theater? Am I listening to the gossip in the front row? Am I playing out drama that I didn't write?

[00:18:54] Am I tuning my earpiece into news, to stuff on the internet that actually has nothing to do with my stage that I have no control over? Am I listening to the critic who thought they were coming to see something that I'm not here to create? Am I listening to? Am I listening to people who have rewritten their play, who know how to tidy it up?

[00:19:19] Who think the kinds of thoughts about themselves that I want to think about myself, right? So who are you listening to? What thoughts, what narrative, what story is being written? Taking ownership over that, right? Listening to the parts of you, inviting all of you onto stage. Inviting the things that you deeply desire, inviting what you really want, and then taking up the role of the director to start making those decisions.

[00:19:52] So decisions are not about trying to make things perfect right away, right? Decisions are about putting the real you and the real emotions and the real actual life into your awareness on stage and being fully present. And then asking yourself questions, do I like this? Would I choose this? If I am really believing that I am the director and the playwright and the lead actor, like, is this something I would choose?

[00:20:25] Noticing how you have been choosing that. You've been allowing it, you've been waiting in the wings, you've been saying yes to it in the idea that you are passive, that you don't get to choose that. You have to fit in with someone else's ideas for you. Okay? And then it's also about being okay with the amount of misalignment, the amount of mess, the amount to which who you've been being that persona who's on stage, the play that's playing out, the props, the way things look, the way things feel.

[00:20:58] Not being, being right, right. Not being what you choose, being okay with. That's just where you are. Where you are at. Okay. I remember years ago I started temp work and one of the companies that I started doing this temp receptionist job at, so temp meaning temporary contract work the way you get sent off to different places where they just need staff for a short amount of time.

[00:21:25] So I got sent off to. This pharmaceutical marketing company, it was a really small one in Central London, and my contract was for two weeks and I'd cycle in to cent the center of London every day for an hour each way. Right. And it was full time, five days a week and low pay. And I was only supposed to be there two weeks, but I coasted.

[00:21:54] Right. I used it to coast. And I ended up being there for two years. I kept telling my boss, I'm leaving now. I'm gonna leave soon. Next week I'm looking for a job. And yet I was there for two years. It started to become my normal. I was living this play that I was pretending that I hadn't chosen. I was making choices that.

[00:22:21] We're coming from this idea that it's okay because one day soon something will happen to me that will mean I don't have to do this. And so I was living what felt like someone else's life and that didn't fit me and it wasn't right for me. And that was exhausting. And I wasn't taking full charge of the fact that I was deciding, right?

[00:22:47] I was the one that was deciding that this is what I was doing. And the only way I got out of it was not because something then better happened to me. It was because I started to make new decisions, right? Difficult, scary decisions to start directing the show, right? To phone someone who worked in a gallery and ask them about how do I be an artist who does workshops?

[00:23:17] I had to make the decision. To go freelance, right? To quit that regular but exhausting income and put myself out there as a freelance artist who wanted to get more work done workshops, and with no professional experience of being an artist, but to, to make those scary decisions, to start directing my life towards what I actually wanted instead of passively waiting in the wings for something to change.

[00:23:49] I then had to do those workshops. I had to learn how to do that even though it was deeply scary. But I did it because at least it was putting me in proximity in the arena of what I wanted to do. It meant I started to believe that I was an artist, right? It meant I was getting closer to playing the role that I decided to be.

[00:24:13] I didn't wanna be a receptionist of a pharmaceutical marketing company. I wanted to be an artist. The only way that that was gonna happen was when I started to make decisions. So I had to take ownership of the fact that this is what I was accepting, right? I was accepting what my life was and making that okay, and just waiting for it to solve itself.

[00:24:36] And instead, I had to accept, okay, this is what I've been deciding, and take ownership over it and let that be okay. Right. Okay. I've been making that decision. I've been coasting. I've been trying to survive and accepting the mess that I felt that I was in, and accepting that my stage was full of props and characters and ideas and plot lines that I wouldn't want, and that I was playing a role that I hadn't chosen or that I thought I hadn't consciously chosen.

[00:25:13] Right? I thought that I had no choice and. That and so to, to start making new decisions, to start being the director, you have to be okay with the fact that this is what I've been doing. Okay? I have to accept, okay, I've been living out some ideas that I got from somewhere else. I've been living decisions that felt like, okay, this is the easy choice.

[00:25:40] Okay. That weren't me taking full ownership and responsibility that this is my stage, this is my play. I choose the role, and I get there and I make that real through making decisions that are in line with it. Now, sometimes we find ourself in circumstances and and in a play that we didn't write, and it wasn't our fault.

[00:26:06] Right? You don't choose the life that you get born into. You don't choose the family. You don't choose the economic and social context. You don't choose the language that you're taught. You don't choose so much of it, right? So you also maybe don't choose the, you never had someone supporting you to know.

[00:26:28] You get to decide. You get to write, you get to, um. Be who you are or what you are bringing on stage is enough, is lovable is yours. Or maybe the audience that came in your theater was not your audience, right? Weren't for you. They came thinking that this was one particular play and you turn up, you are born.

[00:26:52] And their disappointment, confusion, their displeasure. It wasn't actually a reason for you to stop, but it felt like it. You believed them, right? So now those voices are still in your audience instead of your people, instead of the people that see you that, that understand you, that appreciate who you are.

[00:27:13] So when you start doing you, when you start taking up full center stage, eventually they either realize and they're like, okay, I've changed my mind. And I see what's happening here and I'm starting to recognize, or they leave. They leave your theater and they free up seats for your people to come in.

[00:27:35] Right? So you can let them go and allow in the people that are your people, right? Let them find out. Let them choose. Let them. Make up their own minds, but know that this is your stage. You get to do it your way. They can leave. You can't, right? This is your one shot, this is your one show. This is your one life.

[00:27:57] Okay? So it's only now that you are on stage, right? You, you are facing what's there. You're facing all of these props and this stuff, and these characters and this persona that you can then begin to. Sort through them. You can then begin to start to take up that role of director and playwright and lead actor.

[00:28:21] You have to accept that who you've been being is the persona or is the hiding in the wings and that that's okay. Right? This happened. You aren't the only one. In fact, most people are living plays that they didn't write. Most people are playing roles that they didn't choose, right? Most people are receiving scripts that don't fit them, so, but you get to now start being willing to make those decisions that most people aren't willing to make to say, no, I'm gonna do this my way.

[00:29:01] I'm gonna be in this mess. I'm gonna step onto that stage. I'm gonna experience the reality of it. I am gonna allow all my true feelings onto stage, be with it, and then one decision at a time, I'm gonna begin sorting through it. How am I feeling? What do I want? What decisions do I need to make? And then begin to start making those decisions, to rewrite that play, to rename the play, to make it yours, to make it true to you.

[00:29:35] To make it reflect the real you, right? So this means no more delaying, waiting for your real life, waiting for permission, receiving scripts that, oh, this is all you get to choose ignoring your unhappiness because you think, oh, someday, one day in the future someone's gonna gimme permission. The director who?

[00:30:00] The voices, the audience that are directing my life currently. One day they'll invite me in. When in fact it's you. It's you that needs to give you permission. It's you that needs to invite you in. So study this, right? How am I going to rewrite my life? So you might want to get around other people who are doing the same, who are learning the skills of making decisions of building life on purpose, right?

[00:30:31] Or. Growing into that director role, that playwright role, that lead actor role, who are willing to be messy and be bad at this first, who are making those tough decisions that maybe don't feel good right now, but are gonna put you on a trajectory. That means that you actually then end up in a play that reflects who you really are.

[00:30:55] So maybe this means getting a mentor. Maybe this is someone who can. Help you look at what your play is like a therapist. Maybe this is someone like a coach who can help you shape your life and make decisions that are in line and keep you accountable to who you are becoming. My point is that you don't have to do this alone.

[00:31:16] You can get around other people who are doing the same. You can get help. You don't need to DIY, this. You don't need to go onto your stage and then feel completely alone in this. Right? Shakespeare said, all the world's a stage. I'm saying, all your life, your life is a stage. Shakespeare said, we all have our exits and our entrances, meaning our time is finite, right?

[00:31:42] You have one show. This is your one life as you, and there's different acts, there's different seasons, there's different parts of it, but at some point the curtains will close, right? And you don't know when. So when are you going to decide like, I'm done? Enough is enough. No more persona living my life For me, no more listening to those audience members that I didn't invite.

[00:32:11] No more having someone else direct the show, right? Someone else's script. Today is the day I've had enough and I'm deciding, right, this has to change. This is enough pain. This is enough waiting, right? I've had enough. I'm willing to do the uncomfortable, scary thing of stepping onto that stage, having a look at it and making, starting to make decisions, right?

[00:32:42] I'm willing to make this a priority now. I'm willing to make me being those roles in my own life, the thing that I'm doing, the thing that I'm working on. I'm not gonna wait anymore. I'm not gonna imagine. A hypothetical future version, right? I'm deciding, I dunno how, but I'm deciding. So that's the difference, right?

[00:33:05] This is how, this is how you come out of an unfinished life. And one day I will and start being right. Today. Today I decide, I'm deciding I'm gonna be in my actual life. I'm gonna be honest about what I think and feel. And I'm gonna start taking ownership over what it is. Sometimes it helps to allow yourself to get angry, right?

[00:33:32] Get fed up. There have been plenty of times when anger was helpful for me to get into that decision making state, right? I'm done. I'm sick and tired of living this way, of swallowing this low standard of over adapting this much. Of putting up with it. Right, and it's not gonna feel amazing. It's going to not, it's not gonna look clean.

[00:34:01] It's gonna, it's not gonna be immediate, it's not gonna be overnight. You've gotta be willing to be uncomfortable, to get mucky, to do a few drafts, to roll up your sleeves, to have uncomfortable conversations. To face the mess, to dig around in the mud, to sacrifice the distraction and the one day and passively waiting, and the comfort of consuming, and you have to start deciding new things.

[00:34:35] One of my coaches said to me that to get the wisdom from your experiences, you have to be willing to wade through the mud, right, to feel the yucky feelings. To admit the regret, to admit the unhappiness, to admit, I don't want this, and to learn the lessons, to find the gems, you have to get in there and sort through it to uncover those lessons.

[00:35:00] Like, why did I agree to this? What was I thinking about myself that made me accept that option? Right? Where have I been handing my power over? To hecklers in the audience, to someone else who thinks that they should direct my life to a political agenda, to a particular system, to an ideology, to a circumstance that was handed me, right?

[00:35:27] What was said to me that I internalized, that led me to just allow that on my stage. Why did I think I had to put up with this? Right? So you have to bring all of that into the light. Face those lessons, learn those lessons. Sometimes we think feeling bad means something has gone wrong, but when you choose to feel bad, right?

[00:35:48] When, when feeling bad is a choice that you're making in order to process emotions, process your life, and ouch learn those lessons, right? I've been accepting this. I've been doing things that I know lead to burnout. I've been over adapting. When is it going to land in me that I need to make a different decision?

[00:36:13] Okay, so that decision is to feel bad, is to get uncomfortable in your character, not sensory stuff, right? Your character growth, that's what actually leads to joy. Growth is what creates joy, not ease, not always letting it be. But instead stretching, right? Stretch being the flowers, stretching up to the sun.

[00:36:40] You've gotta be in the light on the stage lights. You've got to be the director. You've got to be the stage designer. And the only way is by being on the stage and not waiting in the wings. So my offer to you today is to choose now, right? Choose today. Choose right now. Don't wait for life too. Force your hand for things to get really bad before you, before you learn the lesson.

[00:37:09] That no, you have to decide. You have to decide enough is enough. I'm doing it today. I'm facing my life. I'm making a new decision. I dunno what will happen next. I dunno how it will feel to step out from the wings and have all of the other actors turn around and look at me like, who's that? I don't know how it will feel when I refuse that script.

[00:37:35] When I refuse the should when I start ignoring those voices, right, that I didn't invite or that I internalized, right? When I start looking through the script and having a look at it and being like, Nope, I don't like that. I didn't write that, that's not for me. Tear out that page right when I start packing up those props, those scenes, those.

[00:37:57] Costumes, the stuff that I hid behind when I start actually experiencing my life by being in it, right? So yes, stuff happened to you. You had things handed to you. You've had more people trying to tell you who to be or who you should be or what's wrong, or why you should hide, why you don't get to decide, right?

[00:38:19] And none of that is fair. It's not fair that you didn't have the support. It's not fair that you didn't have an audience saying, yes, this play's good. We like this actor. This story is excellent. This play is desirable and worthy and right. I'm gonna write a good review. Right? It's not your fault that you didn't have that at times.

[00:38:40] Okay? It is unfair. But now what is still your stage is still your play. It's still your time. It's still your life. And when you start making decisions that are a yes to you, here's what happens. You find out that you can handle those hecklers, right? You can handle a confused audience. People deciding to leave, other people coming in that are a better match.

[00:39:08] People not understanding they will be fine. You can handle choosing you instead of pleasing them, and you can find out that it feels so much better. Even when they're not happy about it, right? You can find out that you can handle a lot more than that younger version of you that ran and hid could handle, okay?

[00:39:31] That all that is between you and the play on your stage that you want to write is decisions. You get to find out who you actually are, right when you are deciding for you. You get to decide what roles you are gonna play in the world, in your life, in your relationships, right? You decide, you write that.

[00:39:54] You start to write the play of your life through the living of it, not the hypothetical version that one day someone will hand to you, right? You start to get to feel seen. You start to know who you are and how to be yourself. You finish things you commit, you bloom where you're planted, right? You start to believe your own word because your own word is the one on the stage.

[00:40:24] It's in the play. You've followed through. Right. So you start to have a new relationship with how much you will do, what you say you're gonna do, how much you get to experience the results of those decisions, what is in your play, right? It becomes real. You start to experience how much agency you have. You start to get to write what all of this means.

[00:40:48] What is the purpose, the meaning of your life? What does it consist of? Who's in it? What are you here to do? Who are you here to be? Right. So the more true that your play is to you, the more that you get to be center stage of your own life, you get to inhabit it. You get to experience the good and the bad.

[00:41:08] You get to be in it. You get to fully live it. You get to make it fun. You get to make it art. You get to find out that it's you who decides, right, and that you don't have to keep making decisions to please others. And when you please yourself, you bloom, you glow up, you rise up, you strengthen, you get energy.

[00:41:32] You feel seen. You get to start making decisions that take you where you want to go. You get to experience the miracle of who you are. You get to look around your life and see yourself reflected. You don't feel invisible. You have people in your audience who see you, support you, appreciate you because they can see you because it's your play, right?

[00:41:57] You get to edit, you get to change it up. You get to try on new roles. So I'm gonna finish there. Tell me how this landed. I know it was quite full on. What are you deciding today? What's some small decision that you know you need to make, or even a big one that you've been avoiding, that you've not been following through on?

[00:42:18] Now it's time to commit. Now it's time to take up the stage. That is your life. Alright, I'm gonna finish there. So much love. And I'll talk to you soon. Bye.

[00:42:31] Thanks for listening to this week's Sensory Siblings podcast. Head over to Solar systems.xyz where you can join the plus Siblings Discord server and discuss the topics explored with other listeners. And if you are ready to go deeper into activating your future self, I want to invite you to join my six month unmasking unschool called the Solar System Plus Siblings.

[00:42:56] You're going to unlearn the habits of self negating, then create self-esteem, self clarity, and the self-belief to model the social esteem that will create culture shifts first in yourself, and then rippling out into everything you do and beyond. Head over to solar systems. Do xyz slash. Siblings where you can join the solar system, plus siblings and I will see you inside.