S4E4 Chris Morrison
Intro - Welcome to Stoma and Continence Conversations from Coloplast Professional. I'm Hannah, Ostomy Care Associate Education Manager at Coloplast. Working in specialist care, I know that stoma, bowel and bladder issues impact the lives of those you care for. This podcast is here to support your educational needs and help you in supporting your patients. You'll hear from fellow healthcare professionals and experts by experience discuss the latest hot topics in the world of stoma, continence care and specialist practice.
This time…
I had visions of bags that would stretch from my waist right down to my knees.
I was getting this stoma and I was having my bum removed so I wouldn't be able to fart anymore!
Don't look at the negatives. There are positives out there. There are so many people that are loving their best life, loving, living a better life now with an ostomy than they were before they had it.
This is my body. This is my ostomy now, I have to get used to it.
People might think it's models, but it's not. I'm a real person. The person that you're looking at in that page has an ostomy!
Hannah - We are delighted to be talking to one of our Coloplast ambassadors, Chris. So I'm joined by Paul as ever. Hi Paul.
Paul - Yep. Hi. It's an absolute pleasure to be joining you today and I really can't wait to hear Chris's story.
Hannah - Hi Chris. Lovely to be speaking to you today.
Chris - Yeah, hey Hannah. Hi Paul. I'm from the lovely city of Derry in Northern Ireland. I am an Ostomate, I have a colostomy. I've had my colostomy now just over six years, and I got it as a result of a large tumor that was discovered in my lower bowel and rectum in October 2016. Once that was discovered it was six weeks in until I had my operation, and I had my colostomy and Ken butt, or Barbie butt as the females refer to it(!) afterwards.
Hannah - So you've been six years then now with your colostomy and how have you found life with your colostomy? Cause we speak to a lot of IBD patients that have been almost, not necessarily expecting, but having a stoma hasn't become a great surprise to them, but, obviously with what you've told us, getting your stoma was a huge surprise to you. So how did you find adjusting to life with the stoma?
Chris - It was a shock at the start. When I first had my first consult with the surgeon, it was sort of mid, late October 2016, and that's when, you know, I first found out that I had to have the permanent colostomy. The tumor was so big that they had to remove it and had to remove everything with it. It was a shock! I did have an uncle and Martina had an uncle who had had stomas, because of cancer. But, you know, we didn't know anything about them. We didn't know, you know, how to deal with them or anything else. I had visions of bags that would stretch from my waist right down to my knees and everything else! But we were lucky that at that meeting there was also a specialist, a colorectal specialist nurse called Gloria, and Gloria was an absolute godsend! She could tell that myself and Martina were shocked and stunned at the end of the meeting, and she actually took us into a private room at the end and spent an hour with us going through everything. She gave us all the leaflets, all the information, a couple of sample bags to take home with us. It made things that wee bit easier. But then we had sort of about four weeks then to prepare for the operation. You know, you look things up and you get all the warnings. You get all the information beforehand and people say to you, don't Google things. Obviously you reach out then on social media and you find accounts, you know, and I, I remember finding accounts like, you know, Rachel – Rocking Two Stomas. She was one of the early accounts and Shell Laws was another one, Stoma in a Teacup. And you know, they were a great mine of information. But it didn't really sink in until I suppose the operation. Then on the 14th of November, I went down to surgery at eight o'clock in the morning, expecting a four-hour operation I was told, and woke up at half seven that night! After 11 hours on the operating table with my ostomy and, and everything else removed below that, tumor gone. So that was my introduction to the world of ostomies.
Hannah – Gosh! So you did go through quite a quick and a whirlwind journey then at that stage. I’d say it was a lot to take in, in that time and you were really lucky, it sounds like Gloria was your little godsend like you say at that point. And what that does show is the importance of the stoma nurse and how useful and well, invaluable they are really for us. And I'd have been lost without my stoma nurses, completely lost without them. Because you go into this, it's like a brand new world, isn't it? It's all of a sudden all this information's coming at you. You're told things you can do, you can't do, and just to have somebody to filter that information out for you a little bit is, oh it is so, so important!
Chris - Yeah, absolutely. Hannah. It's, it's so overwhelming at the start. I mean, I remember waking up and even though we had done all the research beforehand, we had read all the information, you know. The night of the operation’s, a blur. I don't remember anything at all because obviously anesthesia, I was wheeled down to the ward to think about 12 o'clock that night, back onto the ward again, under the Progressive Care Unit, I think they called it, where you had one nurse to four patients. So I was there for four or five days afterwards. But, you wake up the next morning and the stoma nurse comes to visit you, obviously, you know, they go through and she says, look, we'll go over here, we'll go into the bathroom and I'll change your stoma for you. And I said, Pauline, look, listen, this is my body, this is my ostomy now I have to get used to it! So from day one, you know, I said, look, just talk me through and tell me where I'm going wrong and everything else. So from the very first bag change that was me hands on. It was a shock! I remember a talk one time and the slide that I used to actually, you know, get across my feelings of how I felt when I looked, when I saw my stoma for the first time was…. Do you know the scene in Alien where the alien bursts out John Hurt’s chest?
Hannah - Yep. Yep…!
Chris - And that's exactly the way it felt and looked to me at the time Hannah, a shock. And I got on with it, but you know what, maybe that's just who I am. It's just my mindset because I've been a firefighter now for 30 years. I was a firefighter almost 24 years when I, when I got my stooma. You know, maybe, uh, things like that sort of prepared me for it, but it was a shock at the start – yeah!
Hannah - And you've almost kind of slid me perfectly into the next thing I wanted to ask you, actually. You've just mentioned then, that you are a firefighter, which is incredible! How soon after getting your stoma were you able to get back to work and getting back into your firefighter role?
Chris - I was still young at that stage. I was only 46, you know, I was turning 47 a couple of weeks. So I was a young man. I was fit and healthy, and obviously I wanted to finish my career, in the fire service. And I wanted to finish my career as an operational firefighter. You know, I didn't want a desk job. You know, I asked my consultant, you know, what's the chances? And he said, Nope, there'll be no problems. You'll be able to go back to work, you know, whenever you're ready. So it was more or less a case of, right, can I lie up on this table now and you do the operation!? You know, let's go, let's get this done! But we set a target of 12 months for me to set foot on a fire engine again, to get that first foot on a fire engine, do my daily checks, and you know, get back to work. I returned to light duties after six months. I hadn't realised how sick I had been in the run-up to getting the colostomy. Because being a typical man, you know, you bury your head in the sand and you ignore all that you're getting sicker and you're getting thinner. And it’s alright, it's only a bug, it's only piles, it'll pass, you know. So I didn't realise how sick I was in the run-up. So we took the six months, got back to light duties in March 2017, and then got passed by the service doctor in early July 2017, to begin retraining for the operational duties. And I set foot back on a fire engine, in November 2017. I missed my deadline by a month because I had to carry out some training. You know, I had to get back into the breathing apparatus training and refresh myself on other training that I missed during the year. So, 13 months from booking sick on duty and getting back to on duty. Once I had taken parade that morning and, you know, given everybody their duties and it was like nothing had happened. You know, the guys just accepted Chris's back. Chris, nice to see you. And then, the banter and the fun starts again. You know, cause, you know, being the firefighter, it is just, it has a brotherhood, and sisterhood, you know, with the females. We're all there just to support each other. And the guys were brilliant all through it. It was like, I'd never been away.
Hannah - It almost gets me quite emotional hearing that actually, because so many people are told there's so many things they can't do that a stoma stops you doing this, a stoma stops you doing that. But, you are every bit the proof that if you can go back to a role like that, so hands on, it can't stop you doing anything, anything at all!
Chris - There's a lot of negativity around ostomies sometimes, you know. People think it should be hidden away because, you know, it's dirty, it's something to do with a toilet! People can get embarrassed about it. People don't want to talk about it. But you can do absolutely anything with a stoma! Listen to your body. Don't overstretch by any means, you know, but you can do absolutely anything with an ostomy. I've gone back to firefighting. I've treked across the Sahara Desert. People go skydiving. People climb mountains with them. So, you know, don't let it hold you back. If you're sitting now and you're listening to this because you've just had a diagnosis where you end up with a stoma, don't look at the negatives. You know, there are positives out there! There are so many people that are loving their best life, loving, living a better life now with an ostomy than they were before!
Paul - You mentioned quite a few firsts there. So you mentioned, you know, your first pouch change. You mentioned your first day back at work. Relationship wise, how did you and your partner find that first time when, for want of better words, you exposed your tummy? Was there any way that you kind of broke into that? Was it an open discussion? Was there anything that helped?
Chris - Because it had been such a long operation and because I was the only person in recovery at the time they let Martina come in. So, that was the first time she had, you know, she saw the stoma while I was out of it on drugs, and it didn't, didn't phase her, it doesn't phase her. You know, it's there, it's part of me, you know. I'm still me because of it. And the children are the same. They have seen it. We have, I have three children. I have, two girls, they're 26 and 24 and Cormack he’s 17. Cormack was 10 at the time. They didn't come and visit me while I was in hospital, and it wasn't because they didn't want to, it was because they came the night before my operation and when they got home there were tears and everything else. And they said, no, that's not our Daddy lying there, you know. But Cormack came to see me five days after my operation and it was the day before it was due to go home. And I remember I had been joking with him beforehand, you know, about, you know, I was getting this stoma, I was having my bum removed, so I wouldn't be able to fart anymore. And, you know, that's just the boy humor, you know, I wouldn't be able to fart anymore! And just as Cormack walked around the corner of the screen to my bed, my stoma luckily just opened up and let the loudest fart that you ever heard over the whole ward! And he just stopped and laughed and says, Daddy, I thought you couldn't do that anymore? You know, so that was his first introduction. Did. But the girls have been, you know, they've been amazing too. You know,they just took it in their stride. I suppose they were glad to have their daddy back fit and well. They've all seen it. My youngest girl, she calls it Fred, and anytime it pipes up, which always seems to be an inopportune moment, she goes, hello, Fred! So first time seeing things, it hasn't phased any of them. As I say, the scene from Alien was my first experience, and I'm sure people get squeemish about things like that! At the end of the day, it's a part of your body that's poking out. If people want to see it, I have no qualms in showing it. Because it gets awareness out there and people should be aware of it.
Paul - Obviously with the type of work that you do, has your stoma changed over that time, that you've noticed or the shape around your stoma?
Chris - No it hasn't, Paul. Thankfully, I've been one of the lucky ones. I'll touch wood on that one! I have a pronounced bulge on my stoma. My stoma nurse tells me it's a hernia, my surgeon tells me, no, it's not. Because, when they were forming the stoma, a piece of fat came through the opening. They pushed it back down again, but it kept coming through and they couldn't contain it. So, it does have a pronounced bulge, which is why I use the concave now. But, you know, the bulge is there, it's noticeable. Thankfully, no, it hasn't changed. The work is quite physical at times. You know, you're lifting ladders, you're bending, you're stretching, you're crawling. When you're wearing breathing apparatus, especially when you're doing breathing apparatus training, because you know, you can be in rooms that are six, seven hundred degrees. And then when you put water on a fire, you get that instant burst of heat! So it could go right up to a thousand degrees in the blink of an eye. There hasn't been actually any changes thankfully, since I've had my stoma six years ago.
Paul - It's amazing to think that what you do with your stoma, it really doesn't stop you does it? You just do keep going, don't you?
Chris - Oh, you know what Paul, I'm the sort of person that if I did stop. I wouldn't start again, you know, so I just have to keep going.
Paul - One of the things I, again, kind of on that thing, that topic of keeping going… During those periods where you have got your breathing apparatus on and all of those kind of things where you are, you know, you're dealing with a thousand degree heat. Are you ever worried about leaks? Whether you've experienced them or not, and, you know, how has leaks, the fear, you know, do you have a fear of leakage at all?
Chris - You know what, any Ostomate that says they don't have a fear of leakage would be telling you lies. Especially in the early days, as I said I use concave now, but beforehand it was the Sensura Mio with the flat base plate. And as I say, I've always had the bulge. I was more scared then, because if you took a tennis ball and tried to put an A4 piece of paper on it, you know, you end up with wrinkles, you end up with folds. So that's what was happening with the flat base plate. So, you know, at times you were getting smells, you were getting leaks and things like that. And, you know, if you're sitting in an office and working, and if you're on a fire engine and working with guys, you know the smells coming out, you know *sniffs*, and you are more quite conscious of it. I would be quite conscious of it myself. But then concave came along and as I say, it was like a switch on moment. There were no folds, there were no wrinkles, so, you know, smells couldn't get out. Yes, I have had leaks. I have had leaks in the middle of the night. I haven't had any whilst working thankfully. I have had occasions because I've been sweating where maybe the bag has become detached, but, you know, things happen Paul. You get up, you get yourself changed, and you go and you get back to it. Once you're, you know, when you're on the fire ground, it's not a case of, you know, you're stuck and you're working, you could be in fighting a fire, but you just get on with things! Obviously, you're focused on a task. So I try not to let things distract me when I'm doing. If it happens, I can always come back outside and excuse myself and go and get myself cleaned up and everything else.
Paul - I think it's, it's that amazingly powerful and positive confirmation attitude that you've got, which I think, is so inspirational. If you were to give a stoma nurse a single piece of advice, you know, during that kind of preoperative period, what would you say is, from an Ostomates point of view, would be one of the most important things for them to kind of talk about or mention.
Chris -The big thing Paul, would be to let them meet real people. Introductions go a long way, you know. Sitting in a room talking, you know, having somebody with an ostomy come and talk to me like this, like we're doing now, it can allay a lot of people's fears. People are gonna go anyway and reach out through social media. I’ve had cases where people have reached out to me through social media and said, look, I'm facing this operation in a couple of weeks time, what's, you know, what's the crack? You know, go and tell me about it? You know, I don't know anything about it? And I'm more than happy to spend time like that, I'm more than happy to listen. Somebody contacted me a couple of weeks ago. And said, look, I have IBD, I'm going next week. I'm gonna have an ileostomy formed. How's my life gonna be after that? And I was able to tell him, look, I have a colostomy I said, but I can refer you on to somebody that has an ileostomy. I, you know, and I was able to pass them on that way. But just answering general questions. I'm not the sole firefighter in the UK or the world that's living with an ostomy. I do have contact with at least six others. There are other people out there. I know one guy after he was speaking to me, he went on then to become an on-call firefighter, you know, it was something that he always wanted to do. And after speaking to me and seeing that he actually went through the process and became a firefighter. So, and I remember one day being in training school, and I got a tap on the shoulder, and it was the group commander in charge of the training school. He says, you're the guy that has the…. the….. I could see him sort of point, and I says, the stoma and the bag? He says, ‘aye’ and I says, yep, that's me. And he says, we've just been looking at your social media. And I says, right, okay. You know, I think, you're worried, what have I done wrong here? He says, no, no, can we have a chat outside. So we went outside and himself and another colleague, and he says, the thing is, he says, we've just had a new batch of On-Call Recruits come in… And I says, right, okay… He says, one of them stood up during the icebreaker and introduced himself and says, ‘oh, by the way, I have one of these’, and pulled up his t-shirt and he says they had the bag. And I could see the panic in the eyes. He says, what do we need to do? What do we have to do? Is there anything he needs? And I says, look, I said, just listen to him. I says, ask him what he needs. I says, if they need a hook put in the bathroom or things like that. I says. But I said, let him guide you. I says, I'll come and speak to them if you want. And a couple of days later, I came down and spoke to the chap and, you know, but it's that initial panic that people have around it. So, you know. My advice to a stoma nurse would be let them meet real ostomates. It's all well and good looking at my picture on a Coloplast booklet and my picture, God help people they have to look at this face, but I'm a real person! People might think it's models, but it's not. I'm a real person! The person that you're looking at in that page has an ostomy! Let future ostomates meet us. You know, we're more than willing to go on and talk to people in the hospital setting if, you know, if we would be allowed to. So that would be my advice. Paul.
Paul - Thank you so much, Chris. You know, it always is a privilege talking to you and thank you for sharing that. And I think that is definitely something that I've spoken to, I've had the privilege to speaking to a lot of Ostomates, and that is something that all, I don't think I can say 99%, I think it's a 100% say to me. If I had the opportunity, I would've loved to have spoken to somebody with an ostomy who's got those lived experiences, who is an expert by experience. I know there are a lot of people out there who have reached out to you, who you supported. So from my point of view, I want to say thank you.
Chris - You're welcome, Paul. Pleasure as always.
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