Lucius Annaeus Seneca, was a Roman philosopher and statesman who lived in the first century
AD.
He is renowned for his teachings on stoicism, and one of his most popular works is "Letters
from a Stoic", a collection of letters that he wrote to his friend Lucilius.
Throughout the letters, Seneca emphasizes the importance of cultivating inner peace
and tranquility in the face of life's challenges.
He teaches that by learning to control our emotions and impulses, we can achieve a state
of equanimity that allows us to keep our calm and live a more virtuous life.
Seneca's teachings on keeping calm have continued to resonate with people throughout the centuries,
and his insights remain highly relevant in today's fast-paced and often stressful world.
By learning to keep our impulses in check and cultivating inner peace, we can not only
improve our own lives but also make a positive impact on those around us.
In this video, we present six ways to keep calm based on the wisdom of Seneca.
By applying these timeless principles to your daily life, you can navigate life's challenges
with greater clarity and composure, and achieve a more fulfilling and virtuous existence.
Keep your impulses in check
Seneca says “It is a youthful failing to be unable to control one’s impulses.”
Seneca believed that one of the keys to being
calm is by keeping our impulses in check.
He believed that when we allow our emotions and impulses to control us, we become slaves
to them, and our ability to reason and make wise decisions is compromised.
According to Seneca, the first step in keeping our impulses in check is to be aware of them.
We must recognize the thoughts, feelings, and desires that arise within us, and observe
them without judgment or attachment.
By doing so, we can begin to distance ourselves from our impulses, and gain a greater sense
of control over them.
For example, imagine yourself faced with a frustrating situation such as dealing with
a difficult co-worker.
In such situations, it is common for anger to arise within us, leading us to react in
a negative and unproductive manner.
However, by following Seneca's advice, we can learn to keep our anger and impulses in
check and respond in a more mindful and constructive way.
The first step is to be aware of our anger as it arises, and observe it without judgment
or attachment.
We can acknowledge that we are feeling angry, without allowing that anger to control us
or define us.
By taking this step, we begin to distance ourselves from our anger, and gain a greater
sense of control over it.
Next, we can take a step back and assess the situation before reacting.
We can ask ourselves whether our anger is truly justified, or whether it is simply a
knee-jerk reaction to the situation.
By reflecting on our impulses before acting on them, we can make more informed and intentional
decisions that are aligned with our true selves.
Finally, we can choose to respond to the situation in a way that is in line with our values.
For example, instead of lashing out at a difficult co-worker, we can choose to approach them
calmly and assertively, expressing our concerns in a constructive manner.
By doing so, we not only maintain our inner peace, but also create a more positive and
productive environment for ourselves and those around us.
Furthermore, Seneca's teachings on self-control can be applied to our daily lives in countless
other ways, from resisting the urge to procrastinate or indulge in unhealthy habits, to remaining
patient and compassionate in the face of adversity.
Through self-control, we can live a more joyful life, while also making a positive impact
on the world.
2.
Practice forgiveness In the words of Seneca “Who needs forgiveness,
should the same extend with readiness”.
Seneca believed that if someone needs forgiveness, the person who has been wronged should be
ready to extend forgiveness.
The act of forgiveness should not be conditional on the severity of the offense or the degree
of remorse shown by the wrongdoer.
Rather, forgiveness should be extended freely and readily to anyone who seeks it, regardless
of the circumstances.
Seneca believed that forgiveness is essential for achieving calmness while holding onto
resentment and anger towards others will only lead to personal suffering and distress.
He acknowledged that forgiveness can be difficult, especially if someone has deeply hurt us or
continues to engage in harmful behavior but also believed that forgiveness is ultimately
a choice that we make for ourselves, not for the benefit of the person who wronged us.
Seneca advocated for forgiveness to be a regular practice, rather than something only done
in response to specific events.
He believed that cultivating a mindset of forgiveness and compassion towards others,
even in times of adversity or disagreement, can help us let go of negative emotions towards
those who have wronged us.
By embracing forgiveness as a way of life, we can experience greater peace and emotional
freedom.
For example, let's say that you have a colleague at work who frequently undermines your ideas
and tries to take credit for your work.
It can be easy to hold onto resentment towards this person and allow the negativity to affect
your mood and performance at work.
However, if you practice forgiveness towards this colleague on a regular basis, you may
find that you are able to let go of the negative emotions and focus on finding solutions to
work collaboratively with them.
Begin by forgiving yourself for any negative emotions you may have towards your colleague.
Acknowledge your feelings without judgment and remind yourself that it's okay to feel
upset, but holding onto resentment only harms you in the long run.
You can also try to put yourself in your colleague's shoes and understand where they may be coming
from.
Perhaps they are feeling insecure about their own work and feel the need to take credit
for others' ideas.
By practicing empathy, you may find it easier to let go of any negative emotions you have
towards them.
You could also, instead of dwelling on your colleague's negative behavior, try to focus
on their positive qualities and contributions.
By shifting your perspective, you may find it easier to work collaboratively with them
and find solutions to problems together.
Even after this, if your colleague's behavior continues to negatively impact your work,
it's important to set boundaries and communicate your needs clearly.
However, do so in a compassionate and non-confrontational manner, focusing on finding solutions rather
than blaming or criticizing.
Forgiveness is a process, and it may take time and practice to fully let go of negative
emotions.
But by doing so, and sticking with it, you may find it easier to forgive not just this
colleague but also others in your life who may have hurt or wronged you in the past.
By letting go of our negative emotions and cultivating compassion and understanding towards
others, we can lead a calm and a virtuous life while also contributing to the greater
good of society.
3.
Focus on your highest aspirations
Seneca tells us "It is not that we have a short time to live, but that we waste a lot
of it.
Life is long enough, and a sufficiently generous amount has been given to us for the highest
achievements if it were all well invested".
Seneca argued that many people waste their time and energy on activities that do not
contribute to their personal growth or well-being, and that this can leave them feeling unfulfilled
and unsatisfied.
To avoid this, he encouraged his followers to practice mindfulness and be fully present
in each moment.
By paying attention to our thoughts and emotions, we could develop greater self-awareness and
emotional intelligence, and learn to use our time more effectively to pursue our highest
aspirations.
By practicing mindfulness, we learn to let go of distractions and worries that can cause
us stress and anxiety.
When we focus on our highest aspirations and make intentional choices about how we spend
our time, we can live a life with greater sense of calm as we are not wasting our time
and energy on trivial pursuits that do not contribute to our personal growth and well-being.
Let's say, for example, you have a big project or deadline coming up at work that is causing
you stress and anxiety.
Instead of getting overwhelmed and consumed by worries about the future, you can practice
mindfulness techniques such as deep breathing and self-reflection.
By taking a few deep breaths and focusing on the present moment, you can calm your mind
and reduce your stress levels.
Now, reflect on your highest aspirations and values, such as doing quality work or being
a reliable team member, and make intentional choices about how you will approach the project.
This can help you to stay focused and motivated, and to prioritize your time and energy on
the tasks that will contribute the most to your personal growth and well-being.
While being fully present in each moment and focusing on our highest aspirations can contribute
to a greater sense of inner peace and fulfillment, it is important to note that life can still
present challenges and difficulties that can disrupt our sense of calm.
It is not always possible to control external events and circumstances, and there may be
times when we feel stressed or overwhelmed despite our best efforts to practice mindfulness
and focus on our aspirations.
However, by cultivating a mindset of mindfulness and purposeful living, we can develop greater
resilience and coping strategies to navigate these challenges with greater ease and composure.
By being aware of our thoughts and emotions, and by intentionally directing our energy
towards the things that matter most to us, we can live a more fulfilling life, even in
the midst of stress and uncertainty.
4.
Accept your fate
To quote Seneca "Fate leads the willing, and drags along the reluctant".
Certain things are within our control, such as our own thoughts and actions, while other
things are not, such as external events and the actions of others.
The Stoics believed it was crucial to focus solely on what we can control, and accept
what we cannot control or the things we are indifferent to.
As human beings, we often desire to control everything, believing that it will provide
us with a sense of security and predictability.
Unfortunately, this is a false belief because certain things will always be beyond our control.
By trying to control everything, we create unnecessary anxiety and stress, and we risk
becoming frustrated and angry when events do not go our way.
For instance, imagine someone who plans a vacation with their friends and meticulously
schedules every activity and meal.
If something unexpected happens, like a sudden change in weather, they may become upset and
irritable, ruining the enjoyment of the trip for everyone involved.
By trying to control everything, this person is setting themselves up for unnecessary stress
and anxiety, and risking damaging their relationships and experiences.
In contrast, by letting go and accepting the situation for what it is, this person can
enjoy the trip with a more relaxed and adaptable attitude, potentially improving their experiences
and relationships.
While we may not have any control over things happening to us, we do have the power to choose
our reactions to those events.
Stoicism teaches that we should accept all the events that happen to us, even if some
of them are difficult or unpleasant.
This practice of accepting one's fate is called “Amor Fati” which means "love of fate"
or "acceptance of fate."
It is the idea that we should embrace everything that happens to us, both good and bad, and
see it as necessary and meaningful.
We should not only accept our fate but actively love it, as it is the path to our personal
growth and development.
Imagine that you are a musician who has been practicing for months to perform at an important
concert.
On the day of the concert, you arrive at the venue only to find out that your instrument
has been damaged during transportation and cannot be repaired in time for the performance.
You have two options: you can get upset, feel defeated, and blame yourself or others for
what happened, or you can practice amor fati and accept the situation with gratitude and
resilience.
If you choose the latter, you would recognize that the situation is out of your control
and that getting upset or blaming anyone won't change it.
Instead, you would focus on the positive aspects of the situation, such as the opportunity
to learn from the experience and grow as a musician.
You might choose to perform with a different instrument or find a way to improvise during
the concert.
By embracing your fate and seeing it as an opportunity for growth, you can turn a seemingly
negative situation into a positive one.
By cultivating an attitude of amor fati, we can reduce negative emotions such as anger,
resentment, and frustration, and instead approach life with a sense of calm and acceptance.
This allows us to better cope with setbacks, failures and challenges, and to live a more
fulfilling and meaningful life.
5.
Ignore other people’s opinions
Seneca wrote “The Stoic sage pays no attention to what others consider shameful or miserable.
He does not walk with the crowd”.
Seneca believed that seeking the approval of others can be a form of enslavement, as
we may become trapped by the opinions and expectations of those around us.
He argued that people's opinions are often based on their own biases, prejudices, and
personal interests, rather than on objective truth.
Therefore, relying too much on external validation and seeking the approval of others could lead
to anxiety and stress.
Furthermore, he argued that focusing too much on the opinions of others can distract us
from our own goals and aspirations.
Seneca advised that we should ignore other people's opinions and focus on our own inner
values and principles to stay true to ourselves and pursue our own dreams and ambitions.
For example, imagine that you have a passion for writing and have always dreamed of becoming
an author.
Unfortunately, your friends and family are pressuring you to pursue a more stable and
lucrative career path, such as becoming a doctor or a lawyer.
If you constantly seek their approval and opinions, you may begin to doubt yourself
and your own abilities as a writer.
However, if you ignore what they have to say and focus on your own inner values and principles,
you can stay true to yourself and pursue your passion for writing.
By following your own dreams and aspirations, you can find greater fulfillment and satisfaction
in life, rather than trying to live up to the expectations of others.
This can help you to feel more confident and self-assured, and ultimately lead to a greater
sense of calm and inner peace.
In this way, by ignoring other people's opinions or by not being swayed by the opinions of
others, we can focus on our own inner guidance and pursue the paths that align with our own
values and priorities.
This helps us to stay calm by reducing the influence of external pressures and expectations,
we feel more empowered and in control of our lives.
That said, it is important to note that Seneca did not advocate for complete isolation or
a disregard for the opinions of others.
He recognized the value of seeking guidance and feedback from trusted friends and mentors,
and believed that constructive criticism and honest feedback could be invaluable in helping
us to grow and improve.
6.
Review your day In our final quote from Seneca for this video,
he says “All our senses should be trained to acquire strength; they are by nature capable
of endurance, provided that the mind, which should be called daily to account for itself,
does not persist in undermining them”.
Seneca believed that reviewing one's day was an important practice for achieving inner
calm and self-improvement.
In order to become wise, we need to study ourselves, not just the world around us.
Self-reflection means taking a step back and thinking about who we are, what we believe,
and how we act.
It means looking at our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and considering how they might
be affecting us.
In our fast-paced, and technology-driven world, it's easy to get distracted and lose sight
of what's truly important.
It's essential to take the time to reflect on ourselves and our actions to understand
our values and goals in life.
By doing so, we can learn from our mistakes, build resilience, and become more self-aware,
which can improve our mental and emotional wellbeing.
Additionally, avoiding difficult emotions and thoughts can have negative consequences
on our mental health.
Ignoring these emotions can lead to feelings of anxiety, depression, and loneliness.
It's crucial to acknowledge and process these emotions to develop a more balanced perspective
on life.
Through self-reflection, we can identify the sources of our emotions and develop healthy
coping mechanisms to deal with them effectively.
One practical way to practice self-reflection is to set aside time each evening and find
a quiet place where you can reflect without distractions.
This could be a quiet room in your house, a park bench or even your parked car.
Take a few deep breaths and calm your mind.
Focus on the present moment and clear your thoughts of any distractions.
You can also keep a journal and reflect on your actions of the day.
Seneca believed that it was important to reflect on one's actions at the end of each day, and
by doing so we can gain a better understanding of our habits and behaviours and work to make
positive changes.
Seneca believed that self-improvement was a lifelong process, and that we should always
be looking for ways to improve ourselves.
We can also take this time to celebrate our success, no matter how small.
By acknowledging our accomplishments, and by reflecting on the positive aspects of our
day, we can cultivate a sense of gratitude and positivity that can help us maintain a
sense of inner calm and contentment.
Ultimately, taking the time to reflect on ourselves allows us to become more self-aware,
we can align our actions and thoughts with our values and goals, leading to greater happiness
and satisfaction.
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Thanks so much for watching.