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Plato is one of the most representative philosophers
of ancient Greece, belonging to its Classical

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Period and he is one of the most known philosophers
of all time.

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He was one of the first thinkers who addressed
the concept of soulmate.

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For Plato, a soulmate is someone with whom
we feel a very strong affinity, and the love

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we feel for that person goes beyond physical
attraction.

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A soulmate is someone with whom we can be
ourselves, in our complete nature.

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For Plato, romantic love is deemed to be of
a higher metaphysical and ethical status than

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sexual or physical attractiveness alone.

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The idea of romantic love initially emerged
from the Platonic concept of love as a deep

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affection, through which we can contemplate
the real beauty of our being - and of the

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world.

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This beauty is not limited to physical beauty,
but also involves a spiritual kind of beauty,

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Plato calling it “the Form of Beauty”.

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For Plato, the love of beauty culminates in
the love of philosophy, the subject that pursues

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the highest capacity of thinking.

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Plato was born into an aristocratic and influential
family and he founded the Academy, the first

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institution of higher learning in the entire
Western world.

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Along with Socrates, his mentor and Aristotle,
his student, Plato is one of the most influential

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individuals in the entire history of humankind.

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It can even be said that he is one of the
pylons of Western civilization.

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As far as we know, almost all of his work
has survived the last 2,400 years, remaining

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very popular the entire time.

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Some of his most famous books include “The
Republic”, “The Symposium”, “The Apology

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of Socrates”, “Allegory of the Cave”
and “The Dialogues of Plato”.

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So keeping his teachings in mind, in this
video we bring you 5 ways to help you find

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your soulmate, from the philosophy of Plato:

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1.

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Believe that there is a soulmate for you

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Plato said: “Love is born into every human
being; it calls back the halves of our original

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nature together; it tries to make one out
of two and heal the wound of human nature.”

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According to Greek mythology, in the beginning,
we were androgynous beings.

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In “The Symposium”, through the words
of Aristophanes, Plato described that in the

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beginning we had four arms, four legs and
a head with two faces.

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Fearing our power, Zeus split us into two
separate parts, condemning us to spend our

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lives in search of our other halves.

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Because of this split, we are severely wounded,
which makes us desire to find our other half

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in order to become whole and to prevent any
further suffering.

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This desire is what we call love, a desire
to reunite with the other part of ourselves.

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This wound can also be seen in a metaphoric
way.

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In our culture of consumerism, we look for
satisfaction in things that cannot provide

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real or lasting fulfilment.

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These false lures include material goods,
power, and fame.

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Instead of denying this longing, this ‘wound’,
we would be better off accepting it.

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According to Aristophanes, if there is a soulmate
and we do not recognise its existence, we

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might neglect this wound, pretend it is not
there, chase unfulfilling goals, get involved

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in random relationships, or stop believing
in true love, resulting in an ultimately unhappy

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life.

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That being so, a life devoted to any of these
goals becomes quite miserable and empty.

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Thus, the first step in finding your other
half is to believe that you have a soulmate,

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that your longing has purpose.

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If we recognise its existence, we are that
much more likely to be more careful and deliberate

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when we choose our partner.

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If you know there is someone out there who
compliments you perfectly, then jumping into

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or staying in a relationship simply for the
sake of being in that relationship, becomes

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a markedly less attractive proposition.

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It is important to have an idea of the form
of love you want to experience, how it should

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make you feel, what kind of qualities the
other person should have that can resonate

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with your character.

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Throughout his work, Plato argues that focusing
on an ideal version of something is one of

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the most useful kinds of thought exercise
we could practice.

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If you knew what something was truly like
in its ideal form, you would then know what

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you need to do to or improve to reach there.

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You can start by making a list of traits and
values you think you would enjoy in your ideal

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partner.

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Perhaps you are attracted to a similar sense
of humor or someone who is athletic and into

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sports, or maybe someone who holds strong
political beliefs.

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No matter what the trait is, consider how
you might be able to embody that trait yourself.

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If you work on yourself in this way, qualities
that you find attractive, then you increase

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your chances of meeting somebody who shares
your outlook and values.

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You shouldn’t settle down until you find
your soulmate.

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For example, before settling down with somebody
you are attracted to but have no idea of their

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other, less overt character traits, give it
a few more months, spend time living together

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if at all possible, until you make sure they
really are ‘the one’ and then take things

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to the next stage.

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The longer you cement a relationship, the
harder it becomes to break up.

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Caution is thus a golden rule when it comes
to relationships, it can prevent you from

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making rash decisions in life which could
leave you even more wounded.

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Heal your wounds first, work on developing
yourself, retain and recall that list of qualities

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you look for in a potential partner and continue
to commit yourself to the same standard.

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Do this and you will be much better equipped
to spot and avoid a potentially bad relationship.

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2.

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Cultivate friendship

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According to Plato: “He whom love touches
not, walks in darkness..”

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For Plato the best kind of philia - or friendship
- is that which lovers can have for each other.

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Therefore, for Plato, love is the best kind
of friendship and it is important for it to

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be the basis of any relationship.

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Plato considered that to live for truth and
authenticity is what really matters and through

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friendship and love we can get inspired to
follow such ideals.

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Where there is friendship and honesty in relationships,
there might be true love.

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Aristophanes, in Symposium, emphasizes that
if everybody found his or her soulmate, the

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world would be at its happiest.

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A soulmate should first be a friend, then
a lover, somebody with whom you can share

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your joy and troubles.

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The best situation is when the two partners
share the same values and principles in life

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or, if not, at least they should respect the
other’s opinion or way of living.

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It is highly important to cultivate friendship
and respect inside a romantic relationship

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from the start.

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When built on a solid foundation of friendship,
a relationship can last a lifetime.

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A real soulmate would never intentionally
cause you deep suffering and despair.

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A soulmate is supposed to make you happier
and more confident in yourself to overcome

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life’s challenges.

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When we engage in a relationship, it is important
to observe whether or not the partner is really

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your friend.

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Do they make you feel more powerful and able
to overcome life’s challenges?

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Or do they give you sleepless nights, worries,
anxiety, and make you feel unworthy of respect

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and love?

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Don’t settle for a relationship which brings
you down, which causes you harm.

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This is especially important for toxic relationships,
when one of the partners feels abused but

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still feels they can’t leave.

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In such cases, it is better to contact a professional
to help you navigate through such situations.

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Always go towards friendship and happiness.

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The successful relationships are not those
of mad passion and destructive tendencies,

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but those that are built steadily, that look
mundane on the outside, based on friendship

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and mutual respect.

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3.

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Feel safe, like you belong

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To quote Plato: “the two are struck from
their senses by love, by a sense of belonging

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to one another, and by desire, and they don’t
want to be separated from one another, not

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even for a moment.

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”

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Being two parts of a whole, the partners would
feel a strong feeling of belonging.

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After endless searching, they finally found
one another and they do not want to spend

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another moment apart.

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Plato, through Aristophanes, affirmed that
Eros, the Greek god of erotic love is the

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best friend of men, the helper and the healer
of ills, it is the power of love that makes

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us feel whole again.

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Having our being reunited, we feel more at
home, more secure and loved and this positive

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feeling can heal our wound caused by the split
made by Zeus.

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When we are separated, we feel kind of lost,
having only one side, like “a flat fish”

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in the words of Aristophanes.

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Only when we find our soulmate can we get
that sense of belonging, of feeling at home.

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Also, when we have such a connection with
our partner based on friendship, we will try

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to be gentle with them, we would not be capable
of betraying, lying or manipulating.

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Real love empowers us to see the good in each
other.

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Such a partnership is like re-finding yourself,
a soulmate can make you feel like you are

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authentically yourself, you’ld feel comfortable
and safe.

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It is not like a relationship from a Hollywood
movie, full of conflict and drama, it looks

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more mundane.

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A soulmate doesn’t judge you harshly, will
let you be yourself and feel comfortable and

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confident in your own skin.

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They would never criticize you in a malicious
way and they would not prefer your absence

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over your presence…well Most of the time
anyway!

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As fulfilling as it can be being together,
it is vital to any successful relationship

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to give each other space and personal time
as well, to respect each other, to not interfere

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negatively with other areas of their lives.

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For example, when they have to work extra
hours at their job, you need to be understanding

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of their situation.

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Or if there is an event around one of their
hobbies that you don’t share, having the

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confidence to let them go on their own and
indulge their passions can be hugely beneficial

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to a happy relationship.

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If we don’t do things apart how will we
ever have new stories to tell each other?

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In order to avoid arguments, it is important
to understand your partner’s priorities

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in life.

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There will be moments when your partner has
to focus on something else and you need to

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respect your partner’s goals and lifestyle.

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The best support one can offer to their partner
is a peaceful home where the other can return

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again and again to replenish their power,
feel understood and loved.

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Therefore, try to talk to your partner, understand
their short and long term goals in their career,

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building a family, their personal interests
and so on.

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Respect your partner's wishes and interests,
but don’t forget to communicate yours as

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well.

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For example, suppose to get a promotion at
work your partner might need to work 10 hours

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a day plus weekends whilst also building their
reputation on the side.

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Rather than sit at home, stewing over being
left alone, only to explode into bitter argument,

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understand and respect their choice and find
a solution of your own.

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Indulge your hobbies, find local activities
to do alone or with friends.

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Fill your time in ways that bring you happiness
instead of arguing with your partner for not

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spending enough time with you.

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A home where your interests and goals are
interwoven and that you are mutually accepting

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of helps in creating a peaceful home where
both of you can feel that you belong, where

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both you feel loved and respected.

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4.

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Climb the ladder of love
Plato teaches us that: “Evil is the vulgar

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lover who loves the body rather than the soul,
inasmuch as he is not even stable, because

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he loves a thing which is in itself unstable.”

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In the beginning, just after the split, humans
were living miserably, feeling very hurt from

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the wound and wandering to find their other
half.

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Zeus, feeling guilty for splitting us in two,
transformed our body after the split, leading

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us to find physical pleasure in bonding with
different people: Zeus turned our sexual organs

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to the front, so we might achieve some satisfaction
in embracing others, not only our other half.

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According to the mythology, because of the
way Zeus made us, it is sometimes difficult

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to differentiate real love from physical attraction.

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Unfortunately, many people appear to live
mostly on the physical level, as if corrupted

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by the body, when they love, they love mostly
the physicality of their partner, not their

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personality.

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In Symposium, Diotima teaches Socrates what
love means.

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She explains that real love is achieved by
climbing through six steps of a ladder.

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There are many ways in which one can interpret
these steps.

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Some say these six steps are six types of
love.

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The first step of the ladder is a desire for
physical features.

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An individual tends to get attracted to what
is missing from their own body like being

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attracted to someone's smile or the color
of their partner’s eyes.

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Then the second step is Love for all bodies
which means realizing the physical beauty

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of others.

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An individual recognizes the physical features
that he is attracted to and understands that

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many others can have that beauty.

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Many others can have that kind of smile or
that color of eyes you are attracted to.

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Since bodies are so similar, it would be meaningless
to see physical beauty in just one individual.

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From this, the next step up the ladder is
to see the beauty that is beyond physical

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appearance.

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This step is called the love for souls.

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It can be achieved by appreciating the character
or the soul of your romantic partner.

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At this stage, one can fall in love with a
beautiful mind even if it's in a body that

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you wouldn’t typically find attractive.

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Then, the fourth step is known as Love for
Laws and Institutions which means together

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becoming interested in achieving kindness
and understanding of fellow human beings,

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in the betterment of our society in a compassionate
manner.

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The fifth step is called the Love for Knowledge.

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It is about realising that there is knowledge
to acquire everywhere and being interested

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in pursuing it, in science, in understanding
the laws of the universe.

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Then the sixth step, which is sometimes called
“love for love itself” means appreciating

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the beauty of this world, and this appreciation
and awe is what is called platonic love, which

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is to love the essence of what is really beautiful,
the true reality of this world.

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True love occurs at this last step, when you
just love for love itself, and don’t expect

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anything in return.

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The soulmate is one of the easiest human beings
to love without expecting anything in return.

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A soulmate can inspire you to climb this ladder
of love, which is why it is so important to

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share the same values with your soulmate.

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When we learn to appreciate that the beauty
of the soul is superior to the beauty of the

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body, we end up loving those who are beautiful
in their soul, regardless of their physical

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appearance.

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According to Diotima’s teachings; once you
reach the higher level, you could never go

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back to the lower rungs.

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Although it is normal to love beautiful bodies
at first, do not spend too many years there,

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try to start giving attention to people who
have a kind soul, whom you appreciate for

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who they are as a person.

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Do not just take a partner who is beautiful,
but really dig deep into each other’s personalities

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and work out if you fit well together, together.

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For example, ask important questions like
“what brings you the most happiness?”,

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“what makes you really angry?”, “what
is your biggest motivation in life?”, “what

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is your biggest regret?”, “what kind of
friends do you have?”, “what was the lowest

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point in your life?”, “what are your principles?
and so on”, and so on.

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By learning each other’s answers, and seeing
each other’s reactions, you can identify

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the real values you both hold and better understand
their character.

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Once you learn to appreciate the souls of
the people around you, it becomes that much

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easier for you to find your soulmate and to
continue climbing the ladder of love.

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5.

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Reignite the poetry in your relationships

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In our final quote from Plato for this video,
he says: “At the touch of love everyone

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becomes a poet.”

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Love often seems like madness.

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In Phaedrus, Socrates says that although madness
can be an illness, it can also be the source

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of man’s greatest blessings.

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The madness of love can make everyone a poet,
raising us to a higher level of existence

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from where we can admire the beauty of this
world and feel inspired.

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When we are in love, we transform, we start
to see more beauty around us, a sunset or

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the smell of a flower suddenly has a different
meaning.

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Love gives us wings to fly to another level
of existence, transforming the reality around

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us.

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Thus, we become poets when we are in love,
we start to see beauty in everything.

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Many of us remember what first love felt like,
many of us have written poems to our loved

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ones when we were teenagers!

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The “love from Aphrodite and Eros” is
such a kind of madness, which inspires us

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to glorify every moment of our relationship.

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However, as the years pass, we start to notice
we experience that rush of poetic inspiration

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less and less often, we become stuck in mundane
life; Eat, Sleep, Work, Repeat.

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But the truth is it is within this normalising
of one’s relationship that the very best

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parts of it can flourish - Or languish into
nothing if not maintained.

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It becomes all-too-easy to stop appreciating
the special moments with our loved ones - a

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forgotten anniversary here, an ignored achievement
there.

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It can be hard to remember to appreciate the
presence of our soulmate when we also have

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to dedicate our time to work and family.

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Therefore, we need to pay attention to when
such inspiring poetic moments are missing

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from our life; Is the problem simply a lack
of time or bad planning, or are you actually

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- deliberately or subconsciously - avoiding
making time for each other?

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If it’s the latter you may need to decide
if your partner really is your soulmate, and

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if they are you need to put more energy and
focus into cultivating your relationship.

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Make plans just for the two of you regularly
- break the routine, re-connect and openly

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appreciate each other often, reminding both
of you just how much you matter and how special

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you are to each other.

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If you enjoyed this video, please make sure
to check out the full Philosophies for Life

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channel and for more videos to help you find
success and happiness using ancient philosophical

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wisdom, don’t forget to subscribe.

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Thanks so much for watching.