Lao tzu tells us that “All streams flow to the

sea because it is lower than they are. Humility gives it its power."

Humility is one of the three jewels of Taoism along with compassion and simplicity. In Taoism,

humility is translated as the phrase “dare not be first”. Taoism teaches us that we are

all just a small part of The Great Oneness. We can imagine ourselves as a collection of rivers

that are all tributaries to a single stream of water. Despite the apparent separation between

the different rivers, they are all connected to the same source. This source is the Tao.

If we apply this analogy to our lives, we’ll find that much like the individual rivers

contributing to that same body of water, we too are all part of a greater whole,

and we are governed by the universal energy common to all of us.

In the hyper-competitive rat-race we call modern life, we very much neglect this wisdom.

We all desperately wish to be the first one to do something or to go somewhere, but often that

is too great a risk or requires more time and and energy than is reasonable, as we are going against

the flow of life. Also, competing and challenging others in order to be first can upset or offend

them, and people often react badly to being challenged this way, sometimes even violently. Our

efforts and struggles towards our goals creates an internal sense of value that often bears

little resemblance to how valuable that goal is in reality. As a result we become too hung up on

labels and titles, social status, wealth, etc. so that when we achieve our goals it naturally boosts

our egos to a stage where we end up looking down on people who are not on-par with us.

The truth is no matter how much one competes and thrives, none of us are really self-made. Ask

yourself how much of your life have you earned? First, our lives depend on our parents. They

feed us, protect us, and nurture us as infants. Did you earn it? No! Then, in your childhood,

you had teachers who helped you learn to read and write, parents who clothed and fed you,

a community that provided food, clothing, and entertainment. As an adolescent, you relied on

your parents to feed you, do your laundry, made it possible for you to go to school, and so on.

So now, as an adult, how much of your life has been earned? According to Lao Tzu, nothing. Hence,

your life is a gift from everyone but you. You are where you are because of the benevolence and

compassion of others. Hence, you cannot look at someone less fortunate and think that they earned

their position while you earned your higher one and therefore, you have no right to an ego. None

of us have earned our keep.

Humility, or not presuming to be at the forefront in the world,

is the only truthful way to relate to the world and to others. It is not a weakness. It is not

a tool to get what you want. It is reality. There are different ways one can practice being humble.

One of them could be taking a walk in the evening and thinking of everyone around you, your family,

friends, your neighbors, work colleagues, and so on… Now think about them without their labels

or wealth. Consider what issues they may be facing. Some may have a troubled married life,

some may be struggling financially, others may be struggling with addictions. Think of ways you

can help them without any expectations. If you begin to see yourself as part of others’ lives,

their problems will become your problems. But by the same token, their joys will become your joys.