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Niccolò Machiavelli was an influential author, 
philosopher, and historian during the Italian  

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Renaissance. Often called the father of modern 
political philosophy and political science,  

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he is best known for his work, "The Prince." This 
book serves as a practical guide for new rulers,  

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offering realistic advice on governance.
Machiavelli changed the way people thought about  

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politics by separating it from ethics. Before 
him, politics was seen as part of moral behavior  

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but Machiavelli focused on what really works 
in politics, not on how things should ideally  

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be. This approach is called political realism and 
it emphasizes practical and effective governance. 

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The lessons in "The Prince" are not just 
for political leaders—they can be applied  

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to everyday life as well. And not just in 
Machiavelli’s time - It's still important  

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today because it provides deep insights into human 
nature and power. Machiavelli believed that people  

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are naturally self-interested and unreliable.
In "The Prince," Machiavelli introduced the ideas  

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of virtù and fortuna. Virtù refers to skill 
and cleverness, while fortuna means luck and  

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chance. According to Machiavelli, a successful 
ruler needs virtù to navigate the unpredictable  

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nature of fortuna. This involves having foresight 
and being effective, which are crucial for  

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maintaining power in ever-changing situations.
Virtù is not about being morally good;  

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it's about being effective and capable. It 
includes qualities like courage, wisdom,  

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decisiveness, and adaptability. A leader with 
virtù can shape their destiny and make tough  

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decisions when necessary. This earns them respect 
because people trust leaders who are thoughtful  

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and strategic in protecting their interests and 
handling challenges, rather than those who are  

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overly generous or desperate for approval.
In society, just as there are financial  

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hierarchies, there is also a hierarchy of 
respect and reputation. By understanding  

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and applying Machiavelli's ideas, whether 
you're dealing with colleagues, friends,  

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or even family, these strategies can help you 
command respect. Let’s see what his teachings are.

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1. It’s Important How Other People Perceive You 

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Machiavelli says "Everyone sees what you appear 
to be, few experience what you really are.”

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Machiavelli believed that how others 
perceive you is far more important  

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than what’s actually true about 
you. It might sound surprising,  

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but perception is the most important thing 
when it comes to gaining respect from others.  

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Think about it - have you ever met someone 
who may not be the kindest or most honest,  

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but somehow still commands respect? Maybe they 
appear wise, fair, or courageous. That’s the  

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power of perception. It’s not about who you really 
are; it’s just about how you’re seen by others.

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In the real world, perception is everything. Just 
think about social media—how many times have you  

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scrolled through pictures of people having the 
time of their lives? We can’t know the full story  

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behind those pictures, but they certainly 
look like they’re living an amazing life,  

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right? Well, maybe they are, maybe they aren’t, 
but because they’re presenting that image,  

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they often gain more respect than others who 
don’t show off their lives in the same way.

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That is why Machiavelli said that the first 
step to gaining respect is to shape the image  

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you present to the world. Here are a few tips 
from Machiavelli on how to manage your image: 

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1. Project Confidence: Even when you feel unsure,  

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act confident. People trust those who appear 
capable, even if they're facing challenges. 

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2. Show Virtue: Be seen as fair, 
honest, and courageous. These  

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are qualities that make people respect you.
3. Control Your Emotions: In tough situations,  

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staying calm makes you look wise and strong. 
People admire those who keep their cool. 

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4. Be Consistent: Make sure your actions 
consistently align with the image you  

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want to project. Consistency builds trust.
5. Build Relationships with Respected People:  

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Surrounding yourself with respected individuals 
can improve your own image, and finally 

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6. Show, Don’t Brag: Let your successes speak for 
themselves. It’s about appearing accomplished,  

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not boasting about your achievements
By managing how others see you, you can  

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build a strong, respected image of yourself 
and the best part is—you’re in control of it.

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2. Be decisive
In the words of Machiavelli  

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“All courses of action are risky, so prudence 
is not in avoiding danger, it’s impossible,  

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but calculating risk and acting decisively. 
Make mistakes of ambition and not mistakes of  

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sloth. Develop the strength to do bold 
things, not the strength to suffer.”

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Decisiveness is all about making decisions 
quickly and confidently. It’s not just about  

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making choices—it’s about making the right 
ones and acting on them. When you’re decisive,  

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you're not just reacting to life around 
you; you’re taking control of your future. 

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Think about it: every decision involves some level 
of risk. But a decisive person understands that  

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and still takes action. It’s better to make 
mistakes while trying to achieve something  

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big than to make mistakes by not doing anything 
at all. Not everyone has this skill naturally.  

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But according to Machiavelli, it’s 
essential for gaining respect and  

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being valued in society. Decisiveness is a 
trait that’s highly prized in leadership. 

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We’ve all encountered someone who seems uncertain, 
constantly hesitating on decisions. How does that  

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make you feel? It can be frustrating, right? 
Most of us prefer being around people who are  

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confident and decisive. In fact, studies 
show that those who demonstrate strength  

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and decisiveness often rise to the top of social 
hierarchies. This isn’t by chance—it’s rooted  

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in our evolution. Historically, those who 
made quick, effective decisions had a better  

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chance of survival. Being decisive saves time and 
shows our ability to act swiftly, a vital trait  

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for navigating challenges. On the other hand, 
indecisiveness wastes valuable time—a resource  

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we can never get back. This principle applies not 
just to humans but to the animal kingdom as well.

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When we make decisions confidently, it’s a 
clear sign of strength, which is why people  

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naturally respect those who take charge. Acting 
decisively tells others that we trust ourselves,  

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and this confidence earns respect which is 
why people admire leaders who are certain  

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in their choices and are more likely to 
follow someone who embodies that strength.

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So, how can we apply this in our own lives? 
It’s about practicing decisiveness. At work, for  

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example, you can take the lead when it’s time to 
make an important decision. Even if you’re unsure,  

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speak up and share your opinion. Your team 
will respect you for stepping up. And in  

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personal relationships, be clear about your 
choices. You don’t have to have all the answers,  

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but being direct and confident will help 
you earn respect. People appreciate when  

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you know what you want and stand by it.
If you're someone who struggles with  

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making decisions, that’s okay! Start small. 
Practice making quick, confident choices,  

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and over time, you’ll see how this shapes 
the way people see you—more as a leader,  

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someone others naturally respect. So, as you 
move forward today, think about how you can apply  

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this. Whether at work or in your personal life, 
make those decisions quickly and confidently.

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3. Balance between fear and love 

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Machiavelli believed "It is better to be 
feared than loved, if you cannot be both."

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According to Machiavelli, leaders can 
maintain power by balancing fear and love.  

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It’s a delicate balance, but one that he says 
is crucial for gaining and maintaining respect. 

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But before we dig any deeper, it’s 
worth remembering that Machiavelli  

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lived over 500 years ago, and this 
is Philosophies For Life today,  

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so while there absolutely are great lessons 
to be learned, which we will get into shortly,  

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they do require some nuance and reframing to 
make them practically applicable in modern life.

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What Machiavelli argued is that while it's 
ideal for a ruler to be both feared and loved,  

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achieving both at the same time is really tough. 
So if a leader must choose, he believes it’s safer  

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to be feared than loved. Why? Because fear is a 
more reliable way to keep control. People might  

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stop loving a leader when things go wrong, 
but fear of punishment keeps them loyal.
 

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Now, that might sound like Machiavelli 
believes in ruling with an iron fist,  

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however, this seems unlikely as Machiavelli also 
warns that a leader should avoid being hated.  

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Hate can lead to rebellion and, ultimately, a loss 
of power. So, it's all about finding that balance,  

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the balance between kindness and firmness.
 
Let’s take a modern day workplace example.  

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A good boss shows appreciation for great work. 
They recognize effort and reward success. That’s  

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the “love” part—making employees feel valued 
and appreciated. But here is the key point:  

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there are times when the boss also needs 
to be firm. Imagine a boss who’s always  

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praising employees for hitting their targets 
and offering support and guidance whenever  

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they need it. That creates a positive 
atmosphere and a leader people want to  

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follow. But if an employee keeps missing 
deadlines or upsetting their colleagues,  

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that’s when it affects the business. 
And that's when the boss has to step in,  

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set clear, reasonable expectations, and enforce 
the rules. It’s about fairness and consistency. 

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By rewarding good behavior while addressing 
bad behavior, you make sure people know what  

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to expect from you. You build trust and respect 
because you’re seen as reliable and fair. But  

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if your actions are unpredictable or unjust, it 
can lead to resentment and, ultimately, a loss of  

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respect - Something every good leader should fear.
The same balance applies in your personal  

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relationships. To build love, show you 
care, be supportive, and spend quality  

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time with those you care about. But also, 
to maintain respect, it’s important to set  

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clear boundaries. If a friend keeps borrowing 
things without asking and doesn’t return them,  

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you have to speak up. Address the issue directly, 
explain how it bothers you, but do it in a kind,  

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understanding way. It’s all about standing up 
for yourself while still being considerate. 

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And that brings us to a powerful point—saying 
“no.” If you’re always saying “yes” to others,  

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people will start to see you as someone who 
just goes along with whatever they want.  

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Saying “no” when it counts shows strength and 
confidence. It can actually make people respect  

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you more because they know you have your 
boundaries.If you’re always on autopilot,  

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constantly agreeing to things, you risk giving 
away your power. But when you stand up for  

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yourself and say “no,” you change how people 
see you. You’re confident and assertive in a way  

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people respect, or in Machiavellian terms, fear.
Saying “no” when you truly believe it’s the right  

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choice can make people rethink their approach, 
and in turn, they’ll respect you more. Remember,  

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you’re the one in charge of you. You 
control whether you give or own that  

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power. And once you establish that, people will 
understand where you stand - And respect it. 

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So, whether you're leading a team at work or 
navigating personal relationships, balancing  

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kindness with firmness helps you maintain control 
while building positive, strong connections and  

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it’s this balance that gains respect. So, next 
time you find yourself in a situation where you  

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need to show leadership or enforce boundaries, 
think about how you can strike that balance.

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4. Strategically Adapt Yourself
To quote Machiavelli "The lion  

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cannot protect himself from traps, and the 
fox cannot defend himself from wolves. One  

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must therefore be a fox to recognize 
traps, and a lion to frighten wolves.” 

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Machiavelli believed that a great leader is 
someone who is ready to change strategies  

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when needed. Sticking to one approach can lead 
to failure, especially when circumstances shift.  

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Think about this—gaining respect isn't just 
about creating a strong image in people's minds,  

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it’s about maintaining that image, too. 
And when unexpected situations pop up,  

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how we handle them is crucial. If we show 
fear or get thrown off by surprises, it can  

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damage the image we've worked hard to build.
It’s all about flexibility. You have to be  

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willing to adapt to the moment. Machiavelli used 
a metaphor to explain this—he talked about the  

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lion and the fox. A ruler, he said, needs to be 
strong like a lion to defend against enemies,  

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but also clever like a fox to avoid traps. 
Versatility is the key. Think about a leader  

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who starts off being tough, like a lion, but 
then switches gears to diplomacy and alliances,  

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like a fox, when things change. It's about knowing 
when to use strength and when to use strategy,  

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and this applies to us in everyday life, too.
If you’re always sticking to the same routine,  

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people might start seeing you as outdated or 
disconnected from what's going on around you.  

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The world is constantly changing, and if 
we don’t adapt, we risk being left behind. 

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Let’s take a business leader, for example. In 
a fast-moving industry, they might start with  

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a strategy of rapid growth. But if the market 
shifts or new competitors emerge, sticking to  

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that plan could be a disaster. Instead, they 
might need to innovate, cut costs, or form new  

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partnerships. This kind of adaptability helps 
the business survive and shows others that the  

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leader can handle uncertainty. It’s all about 
handling change with confidence. When you adapt,  

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you not only protect your reputation, but you 
also gain respect from those around you—whether  

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it's employees, investors, or anyone else. 
People respect leaders who can navigate  

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through challenges and adjust when needed.
So, if you're facing unexpected challenges in your  

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life, don’t resist them. Embrace them! Remember, 
the only constant in life is change. By adapting  

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your strategies to fit the new situation, you’ll 
not only keep your image intact but also ensure  

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that others continue to respect you as someone 
who can handle anything that comes your way.

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5. Show Generosity in a Measured Way
Machiavelli once wrote “It is wiser  

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to have a reputation for meanness 
which brings reproach without hatred,  

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than to be compelled through 
seeking a reputation for liberality  

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to incur a name for rapacity which 
begets reproach with hatred.”

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Now, this may sound confusing at first, but 
if we translate this into modern English,  

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all Machivelli is saying is “It’s 
better to be known for being mean,  

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which brings criticism without hatred, than 
to be compelled through seeking a reputation  

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for openness to suffer a name for greed 
which brings about criticism with hatred.”

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Surely everyone watching this video can 
think of someone you know who struggles  

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with being selective when showing generosity. 
How much respect do they command in your circle?  

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They might be loved for many reasons, but in 
terms of respect, it often falls short. Now,  

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why is that? The answer lies in how generosity is 
linked to respect. When you're overly generous,  

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it can reflect poorly on your values and 
your ability to be discerning. It suggests  

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that you're willing to reward anyone, which can 
lower the respect others have for you. People  

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might think they can get by with doing the bare 
minimum and still receive rewards. Machiavelli  

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also warns that excessive generosity, even if 
well-intentioned, can lead to being exploited  

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or running out of resources. Instead, he advises 
being strategic—knowing when and how much to give.

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This showing generosity in a measured way can 
actually increase admiration and loyalty. Let’s  

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put this into perspective. Imagine a manager who 
rewards employees thoughtfully. Instead of handing  

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out praise or bonuses to everyone, they recognize 
those who have shown exceptional dedication. This  

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not only motivates the team but also earns the 
manager respect for their fair leadership. When  

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your generosity is measured, it shows you act 
with intention and control, rather than trying  

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to win favor through grand gestures. People 
respect leaders who are thoughtful in their  

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actions because it signals maturity and strength. 
Excessive generosity, on the other hand, can make  

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you seem desperate for approval, potentially 
reducing the respect others have for you. 

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And there's more to it. Practicing measured 
generosity helps people appreciate what they  

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receive rather than expecting it constantly, 
which can lead to entitlement. So, next time  

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you feel the urge to be generous, ask yourself 
a few key questions. Who truly deserves it? Who  

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has shown genuine loyalty? Identify those who 
are most deserving and show your appreciation  

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through thoughtful comments, affirmations 
of their hard work, or symbolic gifts. Also,  

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consider who you care about the most. Focus on 
rewarding these individuals. By asking these  

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questions, you can practice generosity in a 
measured way, just as Machiavelli suggests.  

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This technique will help you choose wisely 
and maintain the respect of those around you.

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6. Have Reliance on your own arms

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In our final quote from Machiavelli 
for this video, he says “He who is  

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the cause of another becoming powerful 
is the cause of his own destruction;  

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for he loses his dominion by showing 
that he is dependent on the other.”

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Machiavelli talks about how important it is 
for a ruler to rely on their own strength, or  

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"arms," instead of using hired soldiers or forces 
borrowed from other rulers. He says that when a  

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leader has their own trained, loyal army, they 
are much stronger and more secure. Mercenaries,  

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on the other hand, aren’t as dependable because 
they fight for money, not loyalty. They might  

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not care about the leader’s cause and could 
even turn against them if the price is right,  

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while native soldiers, who are invested in 
the leader’s success, are much more reliable. 

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Thus having a loyal, native force gives a ruler 
a more stable and lasting power and relying on  

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your own forces shows strength and independence, 
which earns respect from both friends and enemies. 

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In today's world, we can apply Machiavelli’s 
idea of "relying on one’s own arms" by being  

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self-reliant and capable, and by building the 
right support system around us. Instead of  

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depending on others to solve our problems, we 
can develop our own skills. This might involve  

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improving your education, learning 
new things, or becoming an expert in  

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your job or passion. By doing this, you make 
yourself less dependent on others. Similarly,  

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just as a leader surrounds themselves with 
loyal soldiers, we can build a strong support  

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system of friends, family, or co-workers who 
are dependable and supportive of our goals. 

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Another way to achieve this is through financial 
independence. By managing your money well, saving,  

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and investing wisely, you don’t have to 
rely on loans or handouts. This gives  

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you more freedom to make decisions on your 
own terms. Taking responsibility for your  

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actions is also a key part of self-reliance. 
Instead of blaming others when things go wrong,  

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you own up to your mistakes and learn from 
them. It’s about controlling your own fate,  

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rather than relying on external factors to fix 
things for you. Just as having a loyal native  

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force gives a ruler long-term stability, being 
self-reliant builds long-term respect. People are  

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more likely to respect someone who consistently 
shows they are capable and dependable over time,  

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rather than someone who occasionally shows 
competence but often relies on others. 

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If you enjoyed this video, please make 
sure to check out our full philosophies  

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00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:49,920
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help you find success and happiness using  

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