According to Lao Tzu “He who rushes ahead doesn’t go far”.

One of the most famous taoist concepts is the concept of Wu Wei. Wu Wei is best

understood as ‘non-forcing.’ To understand this concept, think of floating along with

the current of a river. If you do nothing and do not force anything, you will simply

be taken along with the current to where you will eventually need to be. A lot of people, however,

do apply force. Maybe they swim in order to get there faster, wasting their precious energy and

failing to enjoy the trip. Or they swim against the current, desperate to get back to the past,

which is exhausting and will not lead to any lasting results. Or they cling onto a rock or

branch in order to stay right where they are, too scared to move on, which is similarly exhausting

and will never bring you to better circumstances. This river is a metaphor for the course of life.

Any force you try to apply to the way your life is going, will be exhausting, hard and ultimately

pointless. If you have mastered Wu Wei, however, you will allow yourself to let the river take you

with it without fuss - you will accept any changes life throws at you and simply move along with it.

This ‘non-forcing’ approach to life is incredibly hard for most people, because society often

teaches us that life consists of moving fast! Society tells you to work hard, create your

own chances, be faster than anyone else, and do more, more and more. If you want a certain job,

go for it! If you want to be in a relationship, go on as many dates as you can! In most cases,

this will eventually lead to people forcing circumstances that they or their lives have

no room for yet. It is a recipe for burnout, exhaustion and disappointment.

The more you try and fail to control, the more powerless you will feel.

Typically, someone who desperately wants a relationship goes on loads of dates and,

as the saying goes, puts themselves out there. But how often have we heard of people who always go on

dates or hop from relationship to relationship or even get married too fast and divorced soon after?

They virtually always end up single, no matter how hard they try forcing a different path for

themselves. Instead, Taoism teaches us that we need to let go of the rush and acknowledge

the natural course of things. Practicing wu wei, however, doesn’t mean that by passively

letting go, everything will fall into your lap. Taking action is vital to achieving anything

but our actions need to be coupled with an acknowledgement of the natural course of things.

Nothing can happen earlier or later than it should have.

Using the previous example, If none of your relationships work out, maybe it is because

you are not ready for a relationship. Some people need to learn how to be single and

love themselves first, or change their behavior or mindset in order to be able to be a good partner.

If you always keep forcing yourself to enter new romantic scenarios,

you will never find out what it is that needs to change. But on the other hand,

when you let go of your desire to control things and instead go with the flow,

trust in your progress, you become more confident and in time, you will attract the right partner.