Carl Jung was a Swiss psychiatrist, and the founder of what we now call Analytical
Psychology. He was born in 1875 and started his career working closely with Sigmund Freud,
founder of psychoanalysis. But over time, Jung took a different path. While Freud believed
that most of our actions come from hidden desires — especially around sexuality — Jung
felt the mind was much deeper than that. He believed that to truly understand ourselves,
we need to look at how the mind is built — what he called the psyche.
At the top is the conscious mind — your everyday thoughts, feelings, and choices. Just below that
is your personal unconscious — the memories, emotions, and experiences you've forgotten or
pushed away, but that still affect how you live. And deeper still is something Jung called the
collective unconscious. This isn’t shaped by your personal life, but by the shared history
of all human beings. Inside it live universal patterns called archetypes — like the Hero,
the Mother, the Wise Old Man, or the Trickster. These are characters we see in myths and stories
across every culture — and Jung believed they also live inside each of us, as possibilities.
Jung also talked about the persona — the mask we wear to fit into the world. It’s how we act
in public, at work, or around people we want to impress. But behind that mask is something
more hidden — something we often avoid. He called this the shadow, the dark parts
of ourselves we were told not to show. This could be anger, fear, jealousy,
or even qualities like ambition or desire. Many of these parts got pushed down when we were young,
not because they were bad, but because the world told us they weren’t acceptable.
But hiding them doesn’t make them disappear. They still live inside us — and if we don’t face them,
they can shape our lives from the background. Jung believed that to grow as a person, we have to
turn and face this shadow. We have to understand it, accept it, and slowly bring it into the
light. That’s what he called shadow work. It’s not about becoming perfect. It’s about becoming whole.
At the center of all this is what Jung called the Self — the full picture of who you are,
both conscious and unconscious. And the journey to becoming your true self, he called individuation.
In this video, we’ll take you through a step by step approach to shadow work so
that you can confront your dark side. Not to fix yourself — but to truly know yourself.
Step 1 - Identify Your Shadow Jung says “Until you make the
unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.”
As we just learned, Jung describes shadow as the part of you that you usually ignore or deny. It
includes qualities you’re ashamed of, things you don’t want others to see, or parts of yourself
you’ve been told are “wrong” or “bad.” These can be things like anger, jealousy, selfishness,
or insecurity. But the shadow isn’t just made of negative things — it can also include your
sensitivity, your creativity, or your need for love. Things that may have been rejected
or shut down when you were growing up. When you hide these parts of yourself,
they don’t disappear. They just slip into the background — into your unconscious — and
start showing up in other ways. You might notice yourself getting triggered easily,
overreacting, judging others harshly, or feeling defensive for no clear reason.
One of the most common ways the shadow shows itself is through projection. This means that
you see in others what you don’t want to see in yourself. For example, if you get really annoyed
by people who show off, it might be because you’ve buried your own desire to be seen or
appreciated. Or if someone’s laziness frustrates you a lot, it could be because you’re scared of
being unproductive or lazy yourself. A good way to spot your shadow is
to pay attention to what irritates or triggers you in others. Ask yourself:
“Why exactly am I judging this person?” “Is there a part of me that’s like that
too — even if I don’t want to admit it?” Another helpful exercise is this:
Imagine a newspaper headline that says “The Worst Things About You.”
What would it say? What are the traits you’d be embarrassed for others to read? Maybe it
says you’re selfish, insecure, fake, lazy, or needy. Whatever comes to mind — that’s likely
part of your shadow. And the more it bothers you, the more important it is to look at it honestly.
Jung also believed that your dreams can reveal the shadow. Since the shadow lives in the unconscious,
it often shows up in dreams in a symbolic way — as a stranger, a dark figure, a monster,
or something that feels unfamiliar. If a dream feels intense or leaves you unsettled, it may
be trying to tell you something about yourself. Ask: “What is this image showing me about me?”
A simple but powerful way to start this work is to keep a shadow journal.
Every day, write down the moments you felt reactive — times when you felt hurt, jealous,
angry, or judgmental. Then ask yourself: What happened?
What emotions did I feel? Why did this affect me so much?
What part of me might be involved here? At first, your answers may be shallow or
confused. But the more you write, the clearer things become. Slowly, you start to notice
patterns. You begin to understand which parts of yourself you’ve been pushing away. And with time,
those parts don’t feel so scary anymore. Once you can see your shadow clearly,
you can work with it instead of running from it. It’s not about fixing yourself. It’s about
understanding yourself — fully. That’s where real growth begins.
Step 2 - Accept Your dark side Without Judgement In the words of Carl Jung, “The most terrifying
thing is to accept oneself completely.” Once you start seeing the hidden parts
of yourself — the jealousy, the anger, the pride, the insecurity — the next step is to accept them.
And this is where many people get stuck. From a young age, we’re taught
to only show our “good” side. Be polite. Be confident. Be kind.
Don’t get angry. Don’t be selfish. Never show weakness.
And these messages come from everywhere — friends, family, school, religion, society,
the list goes on... So it makes sense that when we notice something “dark” inside us,
our first instinct is to push it away or hide it.
But Jung believed something different. He believed that true healing begins
not by running from the shadow — but by turning toward it with honesty.
Those uncomfortable parts — the ones you were told not to show — they’re still part of you.
And without them, you’ll always feel like something’s missing.
To become whole, you have to stop pretending that your darkness isn’t there.
So if you notice that you feel jealous, or angry, or needy — it’s okay.
It doesn’t mean you’re a bad person. It just means you’re human.
Jung said your shadow isn’t your enemy. It’s the part of you that’s been waiting to
be seen — to be heard and understood. So how do you begin to accept it?
One gentle way is to write a letter to your shadow.
Write as if you’re speaking to a friend — with softness, not judgment.
You could write something like: “I see you. I know you feel insecure sometimes.
I know you get angry. I know you want to be seen. And that’s okay. You don’t have to hide anymore.”
Let your words be honest. Don’t try to fix anything or make it sound good.
Just let it flow. Let the truth come out. And when you’re done, take a moment to read what
you wrote — not with shame, but with kindness. You’re not writing this to “fix” your
shadow—you’re writing it to understand it. And that
understanding is what creates space for healing. Now, this might seem like an insignificant step in
the journey, but actually accepting your shadow is one of the most difficult parts… In fact,
it’s also one of the most powerful! Because the moment you meet these hidden parts of
yourself without shame, they begin to lose their hold on you. There's nothing left to
hide. Nothing left to fear. And in that space, you can finally be yourself without guilt.
Step 3 - Trace the Origin According to Carl Jung “Our
shadow sides are born the moment we are told that certain parts of us are ‘not okay.’”
Jung and Freud both believed that childhood is one of the most important parts of our lives.
It’s when we start to understand the world, and more importantly, when we start to understand
ourselves. Freud even said, “The child is father of the man,” meaning the person we grow up to
become is shaped by who we were as children. They also believed that many of our struggles
as adults come from those early years. The fears we carry, the parts of ourselves we
try to hide — most of it begins in childhood. That’s why, if you’re working on understanding
your shadow — the hidden or rejected parts of yourself — you have to look back at your past.
You have to go back to where it all started. Think about it. Maybe when you were a child,
you were told not to cry, so you learned to keep your feelings to yourself. Or maybe someone made
fun of you for being too emotional or too quiet or too playful — and you decided to hide that
part of yourself to avoid getting hurt. This is how the shadow begins. You didn’t
do anything wrong — you were just trying to protect yourself. But over time, this hiding
becomes a habit. And as you grow older, that hidden part doesn’t go away. It stays with you,
quietly shaping your choices, your thoughts, and how you see yourself.
Jung believed that healing begins when we stop hiding these parts and start accepting
them. And to do that, we need to trace them back to their source. Ask yourself gently:
“When was the first time I felt like this part of me wasn’t okay?”
“Who told me that?” “How did I feel back then?”
And maybe the most important one: “Why did I choose to hide it?”
These questions can feel heavy. But they help you understand your story. And once
you understand it, you can begin to change it. When you see clearly why you’ve been hiding,
you also see that you don’t have to keep doing it. You start to feel a little lighter. You begin to
trust yourself more. And slowly, you become more of who you really are — not just the
version that the world asked you to be. So if you’re on a journey of healing,
start by looking back. And don’t look back in anger… go gently. Be honest. Because the
story of your shadow didn’t start today — but the story of your freedom can.
Step 4 - Have a Dialogue With your Shadow
Jung once wrote “To confront a person with their shadow is to show them their own light.”
Now that you’ve started to see your shadow and have begun to accept it,
the next step is to talk to it. Jung called this process active imagination. It’s a simple practice
where you consciously talk to your unconscious mind—especially the parts that are usually quiet.
Jung didn’t believe the shadow was just some dark corner of your personality sitting in
silence. He believed it had something to say. It wants to be heard. It wants to be
seen. Most of all, it wants to be understood. Think about it — the anger you keep pushing
down might actually be trying to protect you. The jealousy you feel might be showing you what
you secretly long for. Even your fear, though uncomfortable, could be showing up to keep you
safe. These feelings aren’t always working against you. Sometimes, they’re trying to
help. But the only way to understand them is by listening instead of pushing them away.
So, how do you do that? Start by finding a quiet place. Sit down, close your eyes,
and take a few slow, deep breaths. Then, picture your shadow as a person. It doesn’t need to look
like you. It could appear as a stranger, a child, an animal, or even as a vague shape.
Whatever shows up, let it. Don’t overthink it. Now approach this image gently, like you would
an old friend. Ask simple questions, such as: “What are you trying to protect me from?” or
“What do you want me to know?” Then, listen. Don’t rush or try to force an answer. Your shadow might
respond with words—or it might answer with a feeling, a memory, or a picture in your mind.
Whatever comes, just notice it. For example, one man imagined his shadow
as a tired, bitter version of himself sitting in a dark room. When he asked what it wanted,
he suddenly felt a wave of sadness. In that quiet moment, he realized his anger wasn’t
really about others—it was about how long he’d been ignoring his own needs. That insight didn’t
come from thinking. It came from listening. And if nothing happens right away, that’s
completely okay. The inner world doesn’t always open on demand. Be patient. Just sit, breathe,
and stay open. Most importantly, don’t judge what comes up. Don’t try to fix your shadow.
Don’t argue with it. Just give it space to be. Let it speak.
Because the more you listen—without fear, without shame—the more your shadow will
begin to trust you. And what it shares might surprise you. It might show you
where you’re still hurting. It might explain the patterns that keep repeating in your life.
Or it may simply ask to be seen, just once. This step is really important in shadow work. It’s
not just about knowing your shadow is there. It’s about understanding how it feels, what it needs,
and why it’s been hiding for so long. When you’re able to sit with your shadow and truly listen, you
begin to build a more honest, more compassionate, and more whole relationship with yourself.
And that’s where real healing begins—not by fighting your shadow, but by giving it a voice.
Step 5 - Integrate Your Shadow In our final quote from Jung for
this video, he says “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light,
but by making the darkness conscious.” This is the last and maybe the most important
step in your inner journey—learning to live with the parts of yourself you’ve hidden. Not
just noticing them, or accepting them, but finding a better way to use their energy. Your shadow is
like a part of you that got exiled long ago—maybe it was too loud, too emotional, or too bold for
others to accept. But that part still holds energy you can use. And once you bring it into the light,
it can become one of your greatest gifts. Take anger, for example. Maybe you learned
that anger is bad, so you buried it. But anger can be a signal that something really matters
to you. Instead of lashing out or turning it inward, you can use it to speak your truth,
set clear boundaries, or stand up for someone or yourself. That’s when anger turns into strength.
Or maybe you feel jealousy and try to push it away. But jealousy can show you what you
truly want. Maybe you want to be seen, valued, or to grow. Instead of staying stuck in envy,
you can use that energy to take action, move forward, and aim for what really matters to you.
Jung believed that we start to live more fully when we stop hiding parts
of ourselves. When we take off the mask and let ourselves be real—light and dark
included. There’s no shame in being human. Maybe you avoid conflict. A small first step
could be simply saying, “I see it differently,” during a calm conversation. You’re not trying to
argue—just being honest. It might feel strange at first, but it’s okay. What matters is that
you’re letting your quiet inner voice speak. Or maybe you’ve always played it safe. But
there’s a bold part of you waiting. Try sharing something you’ve created. Ask for what you
need. Or try something new. That boldness isn’t wrong—it just needs your permission.
If your shadow includes habits like being manipulative, that doesn’t mean you’re a
bad person. It just means you can learn to use that same insight in a better way. Like
becoming more emotionally aware, or knowing how to handle hard conversations with care.
And if you’ve always had a strong urge to lead, that’s not a flaw either. You can still lead—with
heart, not ego. With care, not control. That same energy, used smartly, becomes a gift. The point
isn’t to act out your shadow carelessly—but to work with it, slowly and with awareness.
That’s what integration means. Not just understanding your shadow in your mind,
but finding kind, safe ways to let it show up in your real life.
You don’t become whole by becoming someone else.
You become whole by becoming more of who you really are.
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