03:18.84
alexei sayle
okay Hello everybody, welcome to episode 109 of the Alexi Sale podcast. This is our Christmas. We always do a Christmas podcast for you just to brighten up your Christmas morning. So this is it.

03:34.84
alexei sayle
What have we got for them, Talal?

03:37.40
Talal K
Oh, mate, there's a stack of reindeers queued up. We're going to interview each one of them. Blitzen's on first. We're going alphabetically. um So we've prepared that. Yeah, we're going to talk to all the reindeers about their travels.

03:52.30
Talal K
I've got some bells I brought along. I thought I'd jingle them a bit.

03:57.27
alexei sayle
that i we got none of that already.

03:58.68
Talal K
um We're finishing with Big Snow Fight, of course, Snowball Fight, you and me. Showdown. Snowdown. Mount Snowdown. I don't have anything case you didn't notice.

04:10.68
alexei sayle
but that's Clearly not. this is i was expecting I was expecting something...

04:18.72
Talal K
Look, I've just woken up, it's Christmas morning. ah You know, I've got a turkey in the oven.

04:21.69
alexei sayle
ah Yeah. At least this is closer to Christmas than Jules Holland's hootenanny is closer to new Year's Eve months before, yeah.

04:28.14
Talal K
Oh, they record that months ago, don't they? What if, like, one of the musicians on the Hootenanny New Year's, in the months after the recording, they could have, like, had a scandal?

04:42.49
Talal K
You know, they could they could turn out to be, like, horrible people, or they find out that the song is racist?

04:42.84
alexei sayle
ah Yeah, I suppose that. No, I'm

04:48.79
Talal K
Oh, did you get it? And Lexi just clapped at a fly.

04:49.84
alexei sayle
just...

04:52.29
alexei sayle
Muffs. Muff.

04:54.49
Talal K
A moth, oh.

04:56.43
alexei sayle
Well,

04:56.57
Talal K
um

04:58.36
alexei sayle
ah yeah well I don't know.

04:59.13
Talal K
Yeah.

05:00.06
alexei sayle
i' I don't know if it's ever happened, really. But, you know, I suppose they have to go towards

05:02.39
Talal K
I wonder. Like they had glad Gary Glitter in the recording and then like by New Year's he's in prison.

05:07.38
alexei sayle
Yeah. Yeah. They have to, I mean, they have to time it.

05:10.40
Talal K
We could just cut it out, I guess.

05:14.01
alexei sayle
Remember years and years ago, I think it was at the Tram Shed. I told this story before. Rick and Aide in the very early days were hired to do New Year's Eve. I think it was at the Tram Shed in Greenwich.

05:26.75
Talal K
Uh-huh.

05:26.87
alexei sayle
And they ran out of material like by about half ten.

05:30.78
Talal K
Okay.

05:31.16
alexei sayle
And they just said to everybody, oh, it's New Year's Eve. There's like a piper and stuff ah to come on. And it was way... way early but they'd you know there's very unresponsive audience they'd run out and say yeah happy new everybody that's

05:48.22
Talal K
Did they make everyone check their watches at the door?

05:50.52
alexei sayle
probably i don't know what uh i told you about the story that they just called it early yeah my

05:55.14
Talal K
That's great. That's great. What do you make a New Year's Eve? Do you ever...

06:02.01
alexei sayle
now i'm usually i'm usually at home and in bed by

06:02.30
Talal K
guys it's

06:05.64
Talal K
You're in bed to by midnight.

06:07.22
alexei sayle
by midnight these days, yeah.

06:08.51
Talal K
Wow.

06:09.98
alexei sayle
Don't watch the fireworks. Well, we usually spend it with, you know, Nigel Plainer and his wife, and it used to be David Stafford and his wife before David died.

06:19.52
Talal K
Wow.

06:21.46
alexei sayle
So we still see them minus David, that's what we do on New Year's Eve. I see New Year's Eve in with Neil from The Young Ones.

06:31.61
Talal K
It's so sweet that you're still really close, you, him and Lisa, actually.

06:34.33
alexei sayle
Yeah, yeah.

06:36.54
Talal K
um Yeah, in recent years, me and me and my...

06:37.53
alexei sayle
He bought out he brought me these. Nigel bought me these socks.

06:39.54
Talal K
but

06:42.95
alexei sayle
Ultra soft alpaca calf length socks.

06:43.01
Talal K
Aw.

06:48.34
Talal K
Very nice. Alpaca.

06:50.42
alexei sayle
Yeah, I think I'm going

06:51.06
Talal K
That's like, people say it's the quality of Kashmir, but much cheaper.

06:55.50
alexei sayle
do that.

06:56.50
Talal K
Yeah, or am I thinking of something else?

06:56.96
alexei sayle
don't know. I'm amazed. Why have you got a... I'm amazed that you have a knowledge of types of wool.

07:04.22
Talal K
to be i think i'm reciting no the all the podcasts i listen to the adverts for for clothing companies i think that's where i got that from people say yes in recent years me and my uh lovely uh wise amazing partner we um have taken to just ditching new year's parties and plans and and spending it with a

07:05.98
alexei sayle
People say...

07:09.05
alexei sayle
People say didn't. Oh, really? right.

07:17.67
alexei sayle
Wow.

07:29.75
Talal K
just either at home alone or we go to our friend's house and just the four of us sit and watch a movie or something.

07:32.12
alexei sayle
Oh, yeah. and There was...

07:35.73
Talal K
It's cause it's much.

07:37.91
alexei sayle
There was also, we used to, with my dear friend Harry, also sad that um he was a bus driver out of Hammersmith Garage, and there was a, they used to be attached to Hammersmith Bus Garage, a flat-roofed pub, you know, never drinking a flat-roofed pub, called the Britannia.

07:54.61
Talal K
Hmm.

07:54.81
alexei sayle
I think a Young's pub where the the the bus crews could get drunk before taking their buses out.

08:00.15
Talal K
Yeah.

08:01.22
alexei sayle
And it was run by Chuck and Janice, a couple from um Glasgow.

08:02.14
Talal K
Take the edge off.

08:08.76
alexei sayle
And they had, for some reason, Chuck and Janice, I don't know.

08:10.25
Talal K
Isn't that Rocky Horror picture?

08:14.62
alexei sayle
But they had staying with them once this terrifying character called Tam. Glasgow.

08:21.01
Talal K
Tam.

08:21.40
alexei sayle
just ah Just a terrifying-looking character. And I was talking to him once, a and people have to forgive my Scottish accent, but I said, well, you must really enjoy new Year's Eve, you know, Hogmanay.

08:37.27
alexei sayle
And he said, nah, I don't go out. I said, so one night of the year, he was an alcoholic as well, so one night of the year I don't go out. And I said, why? And he said, amateur oor.

08:50.23
alexei sayle
Amateur Ur. He it was offended by the thought of, you know, his what he did was get paralytic, really. And he was offended by sight of all these other people, you know, once a year getting drunk.

09:03.81
Talal K
These rookies. Yeah.

09:06.43
alexei sayle
Amateur Ur. So I've always remembered that. Yeah.

09:10.48
Talal K
It's true.

09:11.48
alexei sayle
Yeah.

09:11.99
Talal K
You know, I've i've never... ive i never I've never been in a fight. I've never struck anyone in anger.

09:18.87
alexei sayle
yeah

09:20.12
Talal K
The one time I was like this close to doing so was a New Year's Eve, was the last New Year's Eve where we went out because it is just, that's when all the morons go out, you know, you're surrounded by them and they've never been in public before it seems like.

09:31.29
alexei sayle
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

09:37.15
Talal K
This geezer was fucking standing on our table And he he fell and smashed all our glasses and spilt all our drinks all over us.

09:47.74
alexei sayle
Right.

09:51.16
Talal K
And then he kept apologizing and that was fine. Like I can accept an accident, but then he kept apologizing and coming up to me and hugging me and saying, I'm sorry, mate, I'm sorry.

09:59.74
alexei sayle
Yeah.

10:00.23
Talal K
It was an accident. I'm like, it's fine. Stop bugging me. Because his he cut his hand on the glass

10:06.04
alexei sayle
there yeah yeah

10:06.68
Talal K
And so I was covered in his blood from every time he fucking hugged me.

10:10.46
alexei sayle
yeah

10:10.60
Talal K
So not only was he incessantly, annoyingly apologizing, he was patting his bloody hand all over my nice shirt. And I was furious. I was so angry. I've never felt that angry. i was I was drunk as well.

10:24.66
Talal K
But fucking hell, amateur hour for sure.

10:24.95
alexei sayle
Where was this?

10:27.42
Talal K
Where was that, B?

10:27.67
alexei sayle
I'm a cat over.

10:30.36
Talal K
Hackney, I think, in a bar in Hackney.

10:35.16
Talal K
and and Yeah, there was a band on stage, so he's standing on the table to watch the band, which was annoying as well.

10:39.18
alexei sayle
Alright, that all sounds horrific.

10:41.30
Talal K
Yeah.

10:42.57
alexei sayle
You're staying this year.

10:45.05
Talal K
I think we've done several years staying in. We might actually go out this year. Not sure. Not sure. Haven't decided. We all decide in the last minute, however we feel.

10:55.13
alexei sayle
Yeah.

10:55.12
Talal K
The pub at the end of the road seems to have a nice party going as well, and then nice easy journey home.

10:58.84
alexei sayle
Okay.

11:02.58
Talal K
Yeah.

11:03.83
alexei sayle
All right, what else?

11:04.03
Talal K
Yeah.

11:04.51
alexei sayle
well we could we did we took could we did We didn't answer any ah questions or emails or anything when Sammy was on.

11:05.66
Talal K
Okay.

11:11.99
alexei sayle
We could do that, fill a bit of time.

11:13.77
Talal K
You're assuming we have some.

11:15.58
alexei sayle
Oh, yeah, I always think we always have.

11:16.15
Talal K
ah

11:17.62
alexei sayle
Don't we always have?

11:17.62
Talal K
Well, we always have them in, but... Yeah, I just read one that posted. That annoyed me. um like The chat is popping off always.

11:30.14
alexei sayle
Yeah.

11:30.20
Talal K
The questions do come in, but but we're trying to keep the Christmas one a bit lighter.

11:31.77
alexei sayle
People talk to each other as this.

11:35.80
Talal K
I don't want it to be too topical because we're Jules Holland-ing this.

11:37.86
alexei sayle
All right.

11:40.83
Talal K
We're calling this one a little bit early, guys.

11:40.92
alexei sayle
Yeah, we're actually recording it in July.

11:45.23
Talal K
We're in July.

11:47.61
alexei sayle
recording this in July 1943.

11:48.87
Talal K
It's July.

11:49.37
alexei sayle
war is done. the war is start

11:52.47
Talal K
Yeah, I've had a question about when do you think this war will end?

11:54.07
alexei sayle
but Well, I think yeah ah i think that the Eastern Front is starting to turn, isn't it?

11:56.35
Talal K
Actually, that one.

12:00.55
alexei sayle
You know, the Germans have been held at Stalingrad. and

12:08.28
Talal K
Lovely message from Nell saying it was really great to meet you in Birmingham um a couple weeks ago.

12:14.04
alexei sayle
Oh, yeah.

12:14.81
Talal K
And when you did the event for Paul Holden's book.

12:17.72
alexei sayle
With the fraud. Yeah.

12:20.50
Talal K
How did that go, by the way?

12:21.69
alexei sayle
Yeah, good, yeah, yeah, yeah, it was nice. we had a nice drive back as well. um yeah it was fine. i

12:34.42
alexei sayle
i I think they should get more people. I mean, it's an important book, really. I think, I don't know. I think there should be, there was about 50 people there. i think

12:43.19
Talal K
Right. Yeah.

12:43.39
alexei sayle
Salma Yacoub said, people tend not to turn out for political things in Birmingham they're all too nice.

12:49.40
Talal K
yeah

12:51.06
alexei sayle
um don't know. I think we could have done with more people in a way. But yes, it was very nice. The people there were lovely, absolutely lovely group of people.

13:00.41
Talal K
Well, Nell sounds lovely too he They listened your podcast on the way home and heard us talking about how you would like to have a Green Party member on the show um to argue their side over the Your Party.

13:02.48
alexei sayle
Yeah.

13:06.07
alexei sayle
All right.

13:16.18
alexei sayle
Yeah, sure.

13:16.22
Talal K
um

13:16.79
alexei sayle
Yeah.

13:17.98
Talal K
And Nell says they've been selected for the Green Party Candidate Program. Program. program um The Green Party Candidate Program. And they're also a certified Marxist.

13:31.45
alexei sayle
ah

13:31.91
Talal K
They'd love to be that person. right Coming in very cocksure and said, yeah, I'll be a guest on your show.

13:33.98
alexei sayle
oh

13:38.13
alexei sayle
Well, we could do that, guess.

13:38.42
Talal K
ah Send me an audition tape, Nell. I want to see and hear how you speak.

13:45.59
alexei sayle
That's a bit judgmental, isn't it?

13:46.64
Talal K
Okay.

13:49.59
alexei sayle
Just because it's after it.

13:51.06
Talal K
ah Yeah, well, think on it now. That sounds good.

13:52.30
alexei sayle
Yeah, yeah.

13:53.09
Talal K
we'll do some We'll do some research on you. We'll find out if you're not a right-wing stooge coming to infiltrate the Alexis Sale Corporation.

14:03.26
alexei sayle
Seems unlikely.

14:06.62
Talal K
um I was Googling in desperation the moments before we started recording. Alexis Sale Christmas. And everything... it was Pages and pages of all of it was about our Christmas message.

14:21.55
alexei sayle
2023. Yeah. twenty twenty three

14:22.39
Talal K
Alternative, alternative.

14:23.58
alexei sayle
yeah

14:24.59
Talal K
2023 Christmas message. And so nothing fast. You have never done like a big Christmas movie or a TV show or something.

14:31.16
alexei sayle
and I don't think so. um I'll just say I've done a video for Amnesty about austerity, it's just very which we did in in the the garden in the square.

14:46.65
alexei sayle
which it's go i think are going to drop it on Christmas Day, yeah, Christmas Eve.

14:46.81
Talal K
When?

14:50.58
Talal K
Yes, that's coming out Christmas Eve and it will come out, it will be on our Instagram as well, Alexis Lpod on Instagram.

14:57.85
alexei sayle
I tried to make it festive by um just wrapping sort of some flashing lights around me or a kind of strip of fabric with flashing lights, which I don't i don't know if you can see.

14:57.85
Talal K
and i'm

15:08.94
alexei sayle
it It looks a bit like I'm just like one of them turtles that's been trapped in some plastic, really. I don' you think think you might think a bit, why has he got that one bit of fabric wrapped around him?

15:16.41
Talal K
The straw up your nose.

15:23.38
alexei sayle
So that's the explanation for that, really. I don't know. It sort of falls.

15:26.30
Talal K
yeah

15:27.44
alexei sayle
think it falls a bit between two stools, between, like, you know, how nicely you made our flat look festive for the the Christmas, the alternative Christmas message.

15:38.80
alexei sayle
This just looks a bit odd, really.

15:41.02
Talal K
You've got to go all out with something like that.

15:42.74
alexei sayle
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. so Anyway, it's the the the message is good. and You know.

15:49.82
Talal K
Yeah, that will come out on Christmas Eve. I'm sure Amnesty will share it and we're going to have it on our Instagram as well. Alexis L pod.

15:57.69
alexei sayle
Yeah.

15:57.91
Talal K
um I also so but one of the things I found was an article in Jewish news.

16:06.11
alexei sayle
All right.

16:07.19
Talal K
um From January 2024. So a month, a few days after we dropped the alternative alternative Christmas message opinion.

16:13.75
alexei sayle
All right. well can Yeah. Yeah.

16:18.01
Talal K
It is anti-Semites who don't understand irony. Stephen Fry's alternative Christmas message has generated a spiteful backlash that illustrates the whole point of his podcast that it is you.

16:28.00
alexei sayle
to me.

16:31.02
Talal K
So they gush about Fry for a while. And then few paragraphs in, it says, Alexi Sayles' alternative alternative message was also revealing Instead of supporting the entire Jewish community, he would stand with that small number of Jews who were part of the United demonstrations for Palestine.

16:53.02
Talal K
For sale, these are presumably the good Jews, the virtuous ones who deserve a modicum of sympathy as opposed to the establishment Zionists who support, and this is in like quotes, genocide and mass murder in Gaza.

17:07.38
Talal K
um All these people assume that mentioning Jewish suffering is a political gesture born of deception and connivance.

17:17.85
Talal K
They also tried to force people into making a binary choice between accepting Jews are victims of racism and showing sympathy for Palestinian suffering. So he has a bit of a go at you.

17:31.18
Talal K
thought that might get a response out of you, but as I'm reading it, I'm like, what do you really say that?

17:35.83
alexei sayle
Jewish News is one of those. It's like Jewish News, Jewish Chronicle.

17:40.82
Talal K
Yeah.

17:41.04
alexei sayle
You know, Lee, he's very much involved in the what we what is revealed in Paul Holden's book, The Fraud, to be entirely or mostly fake accusations of anti-Semitism against Jeremy Corbyn. So that's what I think he used Jewish News.

18:01.43
Talal K
Yeah. Some of the shit they say. I do follow Jewish News just to get an insight on, uh, all points of view and they often share pretty rampant pro-Israeli stuff but then occasionally they'll they'll share a story that's very pragmatic and diplomatic and quite positive and the comment section is so spiteful and hateful and like they go shame on you for writing this

18:22.45
alexei sayle
Really?

18:32.31
alexei sayle
Yeah.

18:37.53
Talal K
So it seems to be quite a broad publication, but the the comments, the audience are just so angry and hateful and racist.

18:41.02
alexei sayle
Okay, fair enough.

18:44.09
alexei sayle
Yeah, well, that yeah. They're ethno-fascists, aren't they, you know?

18:48.98
Talal K
Sickens me.

18:51.99
Talal K
Bewilders me.

18:52.02
alexei sayle
Yeah.

18:54.71
Talal K
I got quiz for us.

18:57.43
alexei sayle
Okay.

18:58.04
Talal K
Would you like to do a really nice trivia quiz?

19:00.73
alexei sayle
Yeah.

19:02.06
Talal K
I want you to play along at home. See, oh, this is okay. Let's call this segment.

19:06.46
alexei sayle
down.

19:07.13
Talal K
Yeah, get a pen and paper, Alexi.

19:08.69
alexei sayle
All right.

19:08.73
Talal K
Everyone at home, get a pen and paper. And this segment is called Beat Alexi. What do you think of that?

19:14.43
alexei sayle
All right.

19:15.54
Talal K
Beat Alexi. We're going to ask Alexi. I've got this quiz round. is TV and film. There are 15 questions, but three of them have an audio element, which can't figure out right now. So there will be no four of them.

19:30.71
Talal K
So there will be 11 questions, 11 points up for grabs, 11 points up for grabs.

19:34.17
alexei sayle
Okay. right. All right. All right.

19:36.74
Talal K
Beat Alexi, everyone at home. Write down your answers. No cheating. Put your Apple watches away. Question one.

19:47.38
Talal K
This is on Quiz Demon. Thank you Quiz Demon. Question one. The opening scene to which 2004 film starts with an auction being held at a shut down old theater house where props are being sold off to raise money?

20:03.73
Talal K
Okay. The opening scene to which 2004 film starts with an auction being held at a shut down old theater where props are being sold off to raise money?

20:06.34
alexei sayle
I don't know.

20:15.13
Talal K
Write down all your answers. I'm going to go through the answers at the end, everybody, and we'll count up your scores. All right, question two. As stated in the opening titles of the classic sitcom Porridge, what was the length of the prison term Norman Stanley Fletcher was sentenced to?

20:33.18
alexei sayle
have no idea. This terrible.

20:39.30
alexei sayle
All right.

20:39.32
Talal K
As stated in the opening titles of porridge, what was the length of his prison term? Norman Stanley Fletcher's prison term. Okay, question three. In the 2000 film of the same name, Billy Elliot, should have been practicing what instead of ballet?

20:57.21
Talal K
Hmm?

20:58.41
alexei sayle
don't fucking know.

20:59.38
Talal K
In the film Billy Elliot from 2000, what should he have been practicing instead of ballet?

21:07.42
Talal K
You want a little clue?

21:08.66
alexei sayle
Yeah.

21:09.24
Talal K
It also begins with B. There you go. I don't normally give out clues in these things, but it's Christmas, so I'm going to be extra nice to you all.

21:18.97
alexei sayle
All right.

21:19.96
Talal K
All right, skipping the music question. So that makes this question four, even though it's question five, very confusing. Question four. Often heard spoken by David Jason in his role as Del Boy in Only Fools and Horses.

21:36.57
alexei sayle
Yeah.

21:37.21
Talal K
Which two word phrase entered the Oxford English Dictionary in 2003?

21:44.25
alexei sayle
Oh, all right. I know. I think.

21:45.76
Talal K
Del Boy, only fools and horses. Which two word phrase entered the English, Oxford English Dictionary in 2003?

21:47.42
alexei sayle
I never really watched it, but...

21:52.85
Talal K
All right, I'm minusing one.

21:53.91
alexei sayle
Alright.

21:56.34
Talal K
So this is question five. In the world of film comedy, How were the brothers Adolf, Herbert, Julius, Leonard and Milton collectively known?

22:08.82
alexei sayle
I don't what need to do.

22:11.10
Talal K
In the world of film comedy, how were the brothers Adolf, Herbert, Julius, Leonard and Milton collectively known? Okay.

22:18.81
alexei sayle
Okay.

22:20.92
Talal K
So I've been minusing one, but I'm skipping another one. So minus two. Is this question six now?

22:26.50
alexei sayle
All right.

22:27.74
Talal K
Is it six? It should be six.

22:29.48
alexei sayle
I don't care.

22:31.26
Talal K
You, you Major, question six, Major Charles Ingram was famously found guilty of cheating on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?

22:42.39
Talal K
When the program was eventually aired two years later, what was the first product to be advertised during the first break?

22:46.23
alexei sayle
Yeah.

22:48.73
alexei sayle
ah fucking if Oh, Oh, I know, probably.

22:52.06
Talal K
Think about it.

22:53.05
alexei sayle
Yeah. All right.

22:54.51
Talal K
All right, Major Charles Ingram found cheating.

22:55.70
alexei sayle
Yeah.

22:56.28
Talal K
Who Wants Be a Millionaire when they finally aired it on the TV?

22:57.59
alexei sayle
Yeah.

22:58.36
Talal K
What was the first advert?

22:58.55
alexei sayle
Yeah. All

23:00.86
Talal K
All right, question seven. In the opening sequence to The Simpsons, which of the characters is scanned at the supermarket checkout?

23:09.05
alexei sayle
right. Okay. Yeah, i know that one.

23:09.75
Talal K
Which Simpson is scanned? Question eight. Starring veteran actors Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau, what is the title of the 1995 sequel Grumpy Old Men?

23:22.87
Talal K
to the ninety ninety three film grumpy old men

23:29.27
Talal K
The sequel to Grumpy Old Men, 1995. ninety nine five What was the title? you should With a bit of creativity, I think you could even guess.

23:40.34
Talal K
ah right, last three. Question nine, i think. In the classic sitcom Happy Days, Henry Winkler played the Fonz.

23:50.94
alexei sayle
Sunday, Monday, Thursday.

23:51.06
Talal K
But what was the character's proper name?

23:56.02
alexei sayle
oh God.

23:56.98
Talal K
Happy Days, The Fonz, what was his real name? What was the Fonz's full name?

24:00.76
alexei sayle
all right

24:01.62
Talal K
Okay, question 10, penultimate question. The Channel 5 drama, Wentworth, is a revival of which classic 1980s Australian series?

24:18.62
Talal K
Was this an Australian website? Why'd they ask us that?

24:23.06
alexei sayle
you're once

24:23.45
Talal K
Unless, I don't know Wentworth, maybe you do. Channel five drama Wentworth is a revival of which classic?

24:28.82
alexei sayle
Just a cautionary tale, once I think we were in ah we were in Canada and it was it was during the height of Trivial Pursuit Mania.

24:38.42
Talal K
Yeah.

24:38.71
alexei sayle
And Trivial Pursuit, I think, which was maybe invented in Canada, and it was much cheaper in Canada, so we bought a a Trivial Pursuit set to bring home. And then, of course, when we got it home, all the fucking questions are about fucking Canada, you know.

24:52.50
Talal K
Shit.

24:52.95
alexei sayle
Which building in Ontario... You know, was demolished by a moose, eh? Out in the boat. It was a false economy.

25:03.07
alexei sayle
Never by...

25:04.09
Talal K
Who in the boot?

25:05.37
alexei sayle
Oot, a boat, they won't let me go. Out in boat.

25:07.10
Talal K
Yeah. It took me years to realize that Monopoly isn't like Pall Mall and like ah Russell Square and all that.

25:08.50
alexei sayle
It's a far...

25:14.04
alexei sayle
Yeah, you get in all different cities. Yeah, yeah.

25:17.08
Talal K
Everywhere.

25:17.94
alexei sayle
Yeah.

25:19.06
Talal K
I thought that was like the main Monopoly, but it's not.

25:20.97
alexei sayle
Yeah.

25:20.98
Talal K
The main, I don't know, the original Monopoly might have been New York. Who the fuck knows?

25:24.54
alexei sayle
Yeah.

25:26.04
Talal K
well Last question.

25:28.06
alexei sayle
Yeah.

25:29.53
Talal K
Which song did the boys finally strip to in the 1997 film, The Full Monty?

25:37.36
alexei sayle
Oh, God.

25:40.98
Talal K
Oh, this guy I was offering a hint. i' can give you a height hint if you want.

25:44.66
alexei sayle
Yeah.

25:44.79
Talal K
i don't want Which song did the boys finally strip to in the 1997 film, The Full Monty? Hint. was sung by Tom Jones.

25:55.07
alexei sayle
Oh, yeah.

25:55.80
Talal K
But I'll give you a hint. My own hint. It's a cover. Okay. It's a cover of a...

26:04.20
alexei sayle
I should cover who

26:05.34
Talal K
I'm not going to give you any more hints. Randy Newman.

26:09.85
alexei sayle
for a Randy Newman song from all people.

26:11.13
Talal K
yeah Yeah. Believe it or not. Small people got no clothes on.

26:16.12
alexei sayle
No. Oh, I Love LA or Baltimore.

26:21.02
Talal K
had a dream last night.

26:21.41
alexei sayle
Randy Newman song.

26:22.90
Talal K
I was in it and you were in it with me. Everyone that you know, everyone that I know was in my dream. i actually really like Randy Neven.

26:31.80
alexei sayle
Yeah, me too. Look at those mountains. Look at those trees. Look at that bum over there. He's down on his knees. Look at those women. There ain't nothing like them nowhere.

26:43.06
alexei sayle
Century Boulevard. I love it. Victory Boulevard. I love it something Somewhere else. I love it. I love L.A. In

26:51.88
Talal K
I love LA.

26:54.30
alexei sayle
fact, I've seen him live. One of the few people I've seen live.

26:55.88
Talal K
Oh wow, lucky.

26:56.87
alexei sayle
Me, David Stafford, the late David Stafford, and Bill Oddy. went to see Randy Newman at the Barbican. And then afterwards, a fan came over and monopolised Bill Oddy, who was surprisingly pleasant with his terrible bore.

27:14.01
alexei sayle
I think about it, really wish I'd said, all right, mate, we haven't, you know, go away now. But I didn't.

27:24.46
alexei sayle
Homer says, at home that says, kind of missed opportunities, that the time Mr. T came to the mall and I delayed and delayed. And when I got there, he left.

27:36.01
alexei sayle
I said to the security guy, do you think he'll be back? And he said, not anytime soon.

27:47.96
alexei sayle
Maybe the last time I saw Bill Artie in real life, I think.

27:53.91
alexei sayle
as ever there's just There's a poignant story with no point.

27:56.66
Talal K
Yeah. Give me some pause with that. Oh, he's still going, Bilodi.

28:03.05
alexei sayle
But yeah, yeah, he's still going.

28:04.57
Talal K
So why haven't you seen him? Give him a call.

28:06.68
alexei sayle
I don't, he's a friend of David's and David's dead.

28:07.01
Talal K
Oh, right. Sorry, man. I'm sorry so many of your friends are dead.

28:14.98
alexei sayle
That's what you get for being 73. 73.

28:17.58
Talal K
Habibi. It's the way it goes, I guess, isn't it? Right, that's the end of the questions in Beat Alexi.

28:24.92
alexei sayle
All right, okay.

28:26.98
Talal K
Listeners at home, have you beaten Alexi? From the sounds of his grumbles and grumbles, it's probably you have beaten him.

28:35.31
alexei sayle
I think you probably have, yeah.

28:36.34
Talal K
but Let's have a look, shall we?

28:36.55
alexei sayle
Okay.

28:38.82
Talal K
Question one. I'll try and make this quick.

28:40.80
alexei sayle
Yeah.

28:42.34
Talal K
Alexi, I want you to give yourself a point for each correct answer. Be honest now and tell me your total at the end, okay?

28:45.10
alexei sayle
Yeah.

28:47.93
alexei sayle
yeah

28:48.54
Talal K
ah And obviously react and tell me if you got it right or wrong.

28:51.99
alexei sayle
yeah

28:52.22
Talal K
Okay. ah The opening scene to which 2004 film auction shut down theater house. They're selling off the props to raise money. What would world did you write, Alexi?

29:00.97
alexei sayle
I've put greatest showman.

29:03.41
Talal K
Ooh, that's a really good guess, but it was Phantom of the Opera, I'm afraid.

29:04.63
alexei sayle
No, I'm not bit wrong.

29:08.42
Talal K
No points, Alexi.

29:08.82
alexei sayle
Was it? All right.

29:09.90
Talal K
No points. and All right. Porridge. What was the length of his prison term?

29:14.85
alexei sayle
Ten years?

29:16.64
Talal K
10 years, you say? and That's five years. Halve it, Alexi.

29:20.92
alexei sayle
Makes more sense here.

29:22.50
Talal K
Halve it. Billy Elliot should have been practicing what instead of ballet?

29:27.43
alexei sayle
Biology?

29:28.38
Talal K
Biology.

29:29.83
alexei sayle
It begins with a B.

29:29.91
Talal K
the Boxing. Boxing. They don't have time for biology.

29:33.90
alexei sayle
Boxing.

29:34.59
Talal K
Biology in the mining towns up north or in Wales or wherever it was.

29:34.81
alexei sayle
Oh, God.

29:39.35
Talal K
think was up north, surely. All right, question four. David Jason ah said a phrase, and only in Fools and Horses in 2003, it entered the Oxford oxford indic English Dictionary.

29:51.61
Talal K
What was it?

29:52.82
alexei sayle
You plonker, was it?

29:55.85
Talal K
That's, I think, that's the misdirect. They want you to say you plonker, but would that go in a dictionary?

29:58.04
alexei sayle
Oh, right.

30:00.93
Talal K
No.

30:01.02
alexei sayle
Not Cushty? No, I don't know then.

30:03.16
Talal K
Lovely jubbly.

30:04.56
alexei sayle
How lovely jubbly. I've got no none so far.

30:05.37
Talal K
Lovely jubbly. None right so far. Question five. The brothers, Adolf, Herbert, Julius, Leonard and Milton. Who are they?

30:15.10
alexei sayle
The Marx Brothers.

30:16.12
Talal K
Correct. How apt.

30:18.80
alexei sayle
Yes, indeed.

30:18.97
Talal K
But why isn't Groucho there?

30:22.88
alexei sayle
Groucho is there, it's just it wasn't his real name wasn't Groucho. He was...

30:26.64
Talal K
Thank you. Okay. um So you've got a point, alexe Alexi. Alexi Sale on the board. How are you doing, listeners at home?

30:32.76
alexei sayle
Hey.

30:33.93
Talal K
Shout out your points now. Oh, very good. Well, let's see if you can keep that streak going. I think this is question six. Major Charles Ingram, who wants to be a millionaire?

30:45.43
Talal K
What was the first advert of that famous episode?

30:49.26
alexei sayle
Cough drops.

30:50.23
Talal K
oh I'll give you it. It's cough syrup. I will give you anything with the word cough in it.

30:52.70
alexei sayle
Yeah.

30:54.26
Talal K
Or if you wrote lozenge or Lemsip, I'll even give you Lemsip guys at home.

30:54.42
alexei sayle
All

31:00.60
Talal K
Everyone, even though Lemsip is terrible for coughs.

31:00.74
alexei sayle
right.

31:02.84
Talal K
Okay. Question seven. Simpsons. Who do they scan in the intro sequence of the Simpson?

31:08.34
alexei sayle
Baby Maggie.

31:09.58
Talal K
Maggie, Maggie, Maggie. Correct.

31:11.09
alexei sayle
Starting to get...

31:14.20
Talal K
Correct.

31:14.97
alexei sayle
Yeah.

31:16.57
Talal K
All right. I think this is question eight. Sorry, it's hard for me to count because i've I have to delete in my head the music round questions. But i yeah, I think it's eight.

31:28.57
Talal K
Jack Lemmon and Walter Matthau, the sequel to Grumpy Old Men. What was it called?

31:31.81
alexei sayle
I don't really know. was it What could have been the odd couple? was It there wasn't Sunshine Boys. I don't know.

31:37.71
Talal K
It's much more obvious, much more obvious.

31:38.22
alexei sayle
don't i don't remember Grumpy Old Men, really. Much more obvious.

31:42.20
Talal K
Yeah.

31:43.42
alexei sayle
Grumpy Old Men 2, more Grumpy Old Men.

31:43.64
Talal K
Grump.

31:45.76
alexei sayle
Grumpier Old Men.

31:46.20
Talal K
like that's closer yeah it's along that but it's it's just grumpier old men yeah

31:48.12
alexei sayle
Yeah.

31:51.45
alexei sayle
Grumpier Old Men. I don't remember. I'll you'll give him a love for that.

31:55.66
Talal K
americans eh all right question nine the fonds what was the fonds's full name come on lex yes give yourself a point alexis sale fuck yes hey sit on it

31:56.79
alexei sayle
yeah ah Arthur Fonzarelli.

32:08.15
alexei sayle
There.

32:13.56
Talal K
um Channel 5 drama Wentworth is a revival of which classic 1980s Australian series?

32:21.05
alexei sayle
Prisoner in cell block H.

32:22.55
Talal K
Yes, Alexi. Give yourself another fucking point.

32:25.72
alexei sayle
Yeah, cooking there.

32:26.28
Talal K
Merry fucking Christmas. Take that point. Stick it in your fucking stocking, you sexy bastard.

32:30.05
alexei sayle
There.

32:32.79
Talal K
Prisoner colon cell block H, but I'll give it i'll give you whatever the the slight mispronouncement you said.

32:37.17
alexei sayle
There.

32:38.71
Talal K
All right last question. Sexy, sexy men, full Monty. What song do they strip to?

32:45.98
alexei sayle
You sexy thing? No.

32:48.18
Talal K
That's in the film, but that's not the final striptease.

32:49.71
alexei sayle
Oh, right.

32:52.98
Talal K
That's not the final striptease.

32:53.02
alexei sayle
No, I don't know.

32:54.54
Talal K
You don't know? It's You Can Leave Your Hat On.

32:55.99
alexei sayle
No.

32:59.40
alexei sayle
Oh,

33:02.06
Talal K
Originally... performed by Randy Newman, written and performed. I think he only really did a demo version of it. And then Joe Cocker covered it. And then Tom Jones covered the cover of Joe Cocker's cover.

33:17.62
Talal K
You can leave your hat on. All right, Alexi, the big moment. Tell me your total scores.

33:24.88
alexei sayle
I got six.

33:25.85
Talal K
Six out of 11. That's pretty good.

33:27.42
alexei sayle
That's not bad. Yeah.

33:29.05
Talal K
Over half.

33:30.81
alexei sayle
Yeah.

33:31.26
Talal K
You know Your table wins a free round. Go to the bar, take this token to the bar, and your table gets a free round.

33:37.14
alexei sayle
Thank you.

33:37.45
Talal K
Congratulations, Alexi. Anyone at home, if you got more points than six, drop us a message on the Patreon chat. Let us know that you got more points, and I'll record an audio message from Alexi to you, congratulating you.

33:51.92
alexei sayle
The Phantom of

33:55.77
Talal K
If you got less than six, what's their forfeit, Alexi? If someone didn't get more than six. On Christmas Day, give them a a challenge, a forfeit that they go have to go and do right now while they're listening to this.

34:11.16
Talal K
If they didn't beat Alexi.

34:15.90
alexei sayle
Go and help the homeless or something. It's what Jeremy does on Christmas Day, isn't it? He goes to a food kitchen, feeds the homeless.

34:23.67
Talal K
Yep.

34:26.49
Talal K
Yep.

34:26.59
alexei sayle
That's the calibre.

34:27.48
Talal K
Go to your kitchen, make a sandwich, go out into the streets and give it to the first homeless person you come across. Unhoused individual. Give them a few coins, whatever it is. Help the homeless. That's such that's such a cute forfeit, Alexei. Why are you so sweet?

34:46.36
alexei sayle
I don't know.

34:46.36
Talal K
You really are the Marxist Santa, aren't you? You're such a sweetie. You could have easily said something cruel like... Get your bum out in the street or call up your worst enemy and tell him you fancy them.

34:56.00
alexei sayle
know.

35:00.34
Talal K
But no, help the homeless.

35:02.30
alexei sayle
No.

35:05.40
Talal K
Well, did you enjoy that? Did you have fun?

35:07.16
alexei sayle
Yeah, it was all right. Yeah, yeah. I'm glad the one that started winning, you know.

35:09.46
Talal K
think I think we've had, yeah. But you know what? I think it's barely even midday. We haven't had our Bucks fizz or our salmon on cream cheese on a cracker yet.

35:19.03
alexei sayle
Yeah. Do

35:22.57
alexei sayle
you remember when Henry Winkler, there was a phase of my agent, my former agent was instrumental in this.

35:22.62
Talal K
And it was too much fun.

35:30.45
alexei sayle
was The big US stars used to come over here and do panto.

35:35.32
Talal K
Oh, yeah.

35:35.73
alexei sayle
Henry Winkler was in panto in Wimbledon. He really liked it, I think.

35:39.37
Talal K
Wow.

35:42.29
alexei sayle
I don't think that anymore. Well, Jeremy Corbyn's, rather cruelly, Jeremy Corbyn's appearing, isn't he, in a panto.

35:49.46
Talal K
Yeah, like a wicked themed panto, yeah.

35:51.00
alexei sayle
Yeah, at the Park Theatre, I think, and where Sammy's going to be. And somebody, so he said, I've been busy, ah I've been found in your party, and somebody in the audience shouted out, it's behind you. LAUGHTER ah

36:10.74
Talal K
yeah ah

36:11.16
alexei sayle
and

36:16.62
Talal K
Oh.

36:16.71
alexei sayle
It's cruel, but it must be accurate.

36:19.16
Talal K
Oh. All right I need to go baste the turkey, Lex.

36:20.65
alexei sayle
i but Yeah, yeah, all right. All right, happy Christmas, every everyone. See you I don't know when we do, are we going to do one and before the new year after the new year?

36:32.19
alexei sayle
All

36:32.34
Talal K
I assume if everything goes well, we'll be back next week. Same time, same back place.

36:35.83
alexei sayle
right. All right.

36:38.01
Talal K
Merry Christmas, everyone.

36:38.07
alexei sayle
right right. Merry Christmas, everybody. Bye-bye, bye-bye, bye-bye.