Hi, Sarah.
Hi Christa.
Thank you so much for coming on.
I know we've been like chatting before recording, but I'm just
so excited to finally meet you.
I think I was telling you, so many people had tagged you in my comment saying, you
need to have Sarah Wiseman on the show.
I love her stories.
And so I thought, what better way to connect and have you on?
Oh my goodness.
How exciting.
I know I love you and your skits.
Oh my gosh.
And we are like, so f familiar or similar, with the wedding stuff,
so I'm so honored to be on your podcast, so thank you for having me.
Of
course.
No, I, love like watching skits and like, obviously like that's
how I kind of got into it too.
We were just talking about how we love telling stories and.
Even before like making skits, like if I was telling someone a story,
I was like such a detail person.
Or maybe the details didn't matter, but I'd be like, the sky was blue and
that girl was wearing a pink shirt.
And then like people would be like, okay, get to the point.
But like, it's just part of storytelling.
I feel like that's how you are too.
Yep, exactly.
I'm like and then there's this detail, oh wait, I have to back up.
And there's more details that I forgot about.
So let me do that real quick.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So how did you start doing this like skit kind of content?
Like how did you start getting into it?
What was your first skit, all that good stuff?
Well, I started off in TikTok, you know, with the TikTok dances
and just having fun with that.
I was trying to leave my job to be like, become a content creator and an author.
'cause I really loved to write and I've always loved to write.
And so, February, 2024, I published my first book, the Invisible Spring.
and I was trying really hard to promote it and get it out there.
it's about like how my husband and I have always like, been
intertwined with each other.
Oh.
So I was like, let's try to get it out there.
I didn't do schizo at first.
At first, I was just kind of like reading passages from it and
doing little bits here and there.
And then I started to do a little bit of, Skits, quote unquote, like where I would
just kind of like talk back and forth, not really get full on into the acting.
And then one day I got kind of overwhelmed with everything and
I was also planning my wedding
I decided, to have a child-free wedding.
And, we had someone, like talk to us about how they went to a child-free
wedding and they said that they had a wonderful time, but she said that, the
bride at that wedding was getting a lot of complaints, from people because they
were like, I wanna bring my children.
And so I was like.
It would be really fun to just like, let loose and do a skit about this.
So I did a skit about a child free wedding, and then it like just
took off like the drama of it.
Like one lady's like, I'm gonna bring my children anyway.
Like I threw that in there and then that one just took off and I'm like, okay.
And then I started to do ones with like bridesmaids and like a
couple going on their honeymoon and just big plot twists, where it
was just like, what just happened?
And then it just took off from there.
And I've been doing skits ever since.
I love
that.
Yeah.
I feel like it's like the skit content is so interesting because
like it allows people to like see it from an outside perspective.
And at first I was like, when I did it, I was like, am I creating like
more I dunno, anger or whatever.
But then like, I've gotten so many messages from people being like, no,
you've helped me like address the situation or you've helped me learn
how to talk to my mother-in-law.
And I'm like, oh, okay.
I'm glad it's doing something.
But it's interesting that you say that your first one was
about a child free wedding.
'cause I think mine was too, it's such a controversial topic.
Yes.
and I've never understood why people get so up in arms about it, even
as a mom of a toddler Now, if my husband and I were get, were to get
an invite, I would not be offended.
And if they were like child free, I'd be like, I girl, I get it.
It's fine.
I know you don't want my toddler running around grabbing everything.
Things are breakable.
I understand.
Yes.
So I don't get where people get offended by it.
I agree.
It was more for me, the reason why I chose a child free wedding
was just like the safety of it.
Like we were an outside wedding.
There was gonna be like an open bar there too.
And I didn't want like the kids to, get into any trouble per se, I guess.
Mm-hmm.
and I also wanted, like, my friends always kept saying like, I just need a night off.
I just would love to just drop my kids off at grandma's and just go party with you.
And then I was like, is if that's really what you want, I'm,
yeah, that's
exactly what I'll do.
Yeah.
I feel like that's the thing too.
It's like knowing your friends and family, like who you're inviting.
Yeah.
Because that was the same for me.
Like, I was one of the last ones to have kids out of my friend group.
They all had kids and they I knew they were the kinds that were like,
no, we're getting a babysitter, we're gonna have grandma and
grandpa watch them or whatever.
That was.
that's how like all of our friends and family did weddings.
Like Yeah.
We had like immediate.
Like nieces and nephews at the wedding or you had like immediate
cousins kids at the wedding.
But most weddings I'd been to, it wasn't just a free for all, like huge families.
And that's, I dunno, here and there maybe, but like for the
most part I didn't see that.
So I just was like, for us, we did nieces and nephews only and
so we have seven at the time.
Yeah, seven nieces and nephews.
And so I invited all of them ' cause they were like a part of the wedding
and then I left it up to the parents.
Like my sister didn't bring her twins 'cause she was like,
it's just they won't have fun.
They'll be fine out.
Yeah.
but I left it up to, the parents.
But other than that I was like, yeah, we're gonna do 21 and older.
Yeah.
I think that is like becoming more of a trend lately to do it that way.
and also I've seen where the kids are there for the ceremony and then
they go home or the couple like, has like a babysitter watch them
during the reception part of it too.
Yeah.
So I see, I see that happening more frequently as well.
Yeah.
I love that idea.
I've been hearing that more and more about like, venues that have like
another room where you can get like a babysitter and put like toys and stuff.
Mm-hmm.
I think if I knew, friends of mine or something, were having a hard time
with a babysitter, I think I would, I've tried something like that, or
if my venue could have done that.
But again, it was like, I feel like it's also like how you, I don't know
how you handled the situation too, because I think a lot of it, I'm sure
like the skit you did too, it's like the entitlement of like, well I'm gonna
bring my kids anyway ' cause it's wild.
Like.
I personally didn't have to deal with that, but those stories happen
all the time where people are like, I don't care if it says no kids.
This is my child.
I'm bringing them.
And like, I'd be mortified to bring my child where she
doesn't belong necessarily.
Right.
You are absolutely
right.
it's not actual no kids' rule.
It's the entitlement.
It's like these people that think that they can just do whatever they want and
Yeah.
So it's more of the entitlement.
Like if you were to message me and say like, Hey, I really need to
bring my infant, or I really need to bring my child, or else I won't
be able to come, I would probably be that person to be like, okay, like I
understand like you have these needs, but like people who just are like.
I'm just gonna show up with my child because I don't care.
I'm gonna do what I want.
that's off.
that bugs me.
That
grinds my gears.
Yeah.
And I feel like it goes both ways too because, I've heard of also stories where
like, let's say the bride and groom says child free wedding, and then someone
in the wedding or a guest says, well, I can't make it then, but best wishes.
Like, they're so respectful about it.
And then the bride and groom get mad and I'm like, you can't get mad if
someone can't still get a babysitter.
So that's also the entitlement of the bride and groom feeling like the world
should stop for their wedding day.
And it's like if you can't get a babysitter and they politely
decline, still send a gift or you know, whatever, you need to accept
that and that's gonna be okay.
Yes, a hundred percent.
Like you said, I see it on both sides and the bride and groom have to
realize that everybody else has lies.
Their wedding isn't like the center of everyone's attention,
so.
Yeah, I know.
So you said that kind of blew up that first skit?
Yes.
So then do you get people sending you in stories or do you kind of just think
of things you've seen or what kind of has mostly inspired the stories you do?
so I do get people who do try to message me stories.
I've done a couple of those, but I don't do them often.
just because, I feel like I would really have to like hop on a phone
call with them sometimes and like really get like the actual details.
'cause I'm like, I did the first one that was sent in to me.
And I'm like, but she didn't tell me exactly how this happened.
How do I interpret this?
I hope I don't interpret it wrong kind of thing.
so I've done that a couple times, but mostly it's just me, having inspiration
from like, what people have said to me.
sometimes I go on Reddit and get ideas from Reddit.
Like I'll take like a Reddit thread.
they'll say like, what happened?
And then I'm like, wow, that's crazy.
But like, what could make this even more crazier?
Like, what could be even a bigger plot twist than that?
So I'll take like, inspiration from those types of things.
Yeah, I love that.
It's funny you say that about when people send you in stories.
Mm-hmm.
there was a wild story one time, I'm trying to think which one it was.
I think it was the one where either it was like a surprise wedding
for the bride, the groom and the bride's mom planned the wedding.
Yeah.
And she was like, it was like scary, like, honestly, like how weird it went.
But all these people are commenting like, there's no way this happened.
This couldn't have happened.
someone literally commented like, do you fact check this?
And I'm like, what do you want me, how do you want me to fact check?
Do you want me to call all their family members?
I was like, you can take everything I feel like on the
internet with a grain of assault.
Right?
I get a story sent to me and I always say.
either I come up with it myself or it's inspired by a story.
And I'm like, I'll just take parts of it and I mix it all up.
You know, I put it in a B blender and I mix it.
' cause I'm like, I only get part of the story.
And even if I get a really detailed story, I'm only getting it for one perspective.
yes.
As I don't agree with the person that send it to me either, which is really awkward.
that's very awkward.
I know what you mean though, because I'm like, yeah, because
a, a couple of podcast episodes actually, we'll see when we get to
ours, but I've read the story with the person and we're both like, oh no, this
person's like in the wrong, like mm-hmm.
Oh no.
Like,
yeah.
Huh.
And then you have to kind of figure out how to like, twist it
and show like both sides and Yeah.
Yeah, no, That's kind of also one of the reasons why I don't do a lot of people
who send me stories, is because like if I do end up changing it and like it offends
them because I don't agree with it, then I don't even wanna get into that or
like, offending them in any way I guess.
So yeah,
this is unbiased.
I'm just taking what I can see.
Yes, exactly.
Like around like if a bride sent it to me, I might make it from
the groom's perspective and mix.
Oh yeah.
okay.
Do you have any wild stories of your own?
Like either something you've seen or heard or something that
maybe you've made into a skit?
I don't know, but yeah.
I have my own story that is based on my own wedding.
And it's a little bit of a long one, but basically, what happened was my
dad didn't show up to my wedding.
Okay.
Yeah.
So, we'll go back to when I got engaged.
I got engaged in August of 2023, and then right after that my father announced to
us that he, was diagnosed with cancer.
Okay.
And, at that point, he announced that in October, I think it was so August?
Yeah, it was a co it was like a month and a half after.
So in October he announced by this time, I had been with my fiancé for
a long period of time before that, so we kind of already had like what
we wanted to do with a wedding.
So our plan was to go on a destination wedding, like a cruise wedding to Bermuda.
we had our heart set on it.
All of our friends were on board.
and so we sent out the invitations.
He got diagnosed.
he was still excited about it.
he was a little nervous 'cause he doesn't like to travel very
much, but he was still excited.
one day I get to their house and, we previously had a cruise plan, but we
had to cancel it because my dad's job and, my stepmom, we'll call her Elle
she commented to me, she's like, oh, you're going to Bermuda for your wedding.
I really wish we could go back to Alaska.
like the other cruise was planned for.
And I was like, oh, yeah, but this is what, Bernard, my fiancé well
now my husband and I really want.
and then that was just, I like, kept that in my mind.
I'm like, oh, that's weird.
couple months go by.
We needed to finalize the bookings for the cruise.
And all of a sudden my dad calls me up and says that he's not going to
be able to make it to the wedding.
And I'm like, I need my dad there for my wedding.
I need my father to walk me down the aisle.
so husband or my fiance at the time, husband now, I'll just call
him my husband from now on out.
Yeah.
But, he and I decided we were gonna cancel the cruise and we were gonna do
an at-home wedding and we were gonna use the cruise as our, honeymoon.
Yeah.
So when your dad first said, I'm not going to the wedding, what was his reasoning?
Was it 'cause of the cancer?
Was this like he just didn't wanna trouble or what?
at first he said like, this cancer is taking a lot outta me.
I don't know what's gonna happen, but I can't travel 'cause of my immune system.
That's why I was like, we need to cancel it.
It's not my dad's fault that he can't make it.
I want my dad there.
Mm-hmm.
And so, we canceled it and we began planning, back home.
fast forward to like, a couple months before my wedding,
so this was May of 2024.
And my stepmom, my dad and I and my sister were out for ice
cream to celebrate my birthday.
And she, my stepmother stands up and is like, I have an announcement to make,
or we have an announcement to make and we're like, oh, what's going on?
We're going on a cruise.
Stop it.
Yeah.
my sister.
Immediately, sna like, breaks her neck, looks at me and is like.
looking at me to make sure I'm okay.
I held my composure and I just like nodded and I was like, oh, And like they
explained what the cruise was about.
My dad was like looking down the entire time like he knew
not even like, wanting to talk.
Yeah.
He knew
he must stop.
So I just like that really hurt.
I let it go.
Other things started.
Sorry to cut in, when she made that like kind of snide comment about I
wish we were gonna Alaska, they went home that night and she's like, I can't
believe they're going on a cruise.
We need to go on our cruise first.
Or like, made some kind of comment.
she probably could have, I'm not gonna say like, I definitely think
she did that or what, but Right.
She is the type of person, she's the type of person to do that, unfortunately.
Which it's really sad, but Yes.
Went along.
yeah, my dad does not have a backbone around her at all.
oh, and when he and her got married, there was some issues way back then.
There was some issues with us too.
We like, kind of fell back, because he married her so fast, like within
two months of knowing each other.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
That's a whole nother story.
Oh, girl.
Wow.
Okay.
Yeah.
So, there were some issues with that.
like during that time, I was young at that time I was in my early twenties.
Maybe I was even 19 at the time, but I was like, I'm not gonna deal with this.
And I moved out Over the years, we got our relationship back and going again.
I started to have more of a better relationship with Elle,
my stepmom and feeling that, and then it came to my wedding and
then this stuff started happening.
And so yes, it does make me question whether or not she
would do something like that.
She is very capable of doing
that.
Um, and
when was their
crew supposed to be scheduled?
For?
Like when your original one was or like late?
Yeah,
like, yeah, around the same time or like a little bit later than our maybe.
Oh, ours was in, late September, early October.
I wanna say it was like around then or November.
Okay.
So it was around the same time.
Yeah.
Did you take everything in you in that moment to not say something?
Oh yeah.
And I'm like.
I like, couldn't process it at that time.
when she told me.
'cause I'm like thinking like, what's the big announcement?
Because she just before that said that she had like a little announcement
and she said that she got a new job when we were at the ice cream place.
it was actually, at that time where my sister said something like, oh,
hey Sarah, just, like her skits are doing really great on TikTok.
She has like 50,000 followers.
And like my dad was like, what?
that's crazy.
And then that's when she was like, I have an announcement to make.
And she like, cut in.
And So you have your moment.
Yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
Like she's the type of person that just needs like the
attention on her all the time.
it's very frustrating.
to skip forward a little bit.
Like other things started happening after that.
my dad was retiring from his job.
They hosted like a surprise retirement party.
He got wind that I was gonna be there, and that caused a huge argument because
he's like, L wasn't invited and you are, do you know how that would make it look?
I'm like, dad, I'm your biological daughter.
I'm like, and it was a retirement party.
He and uninvited me from his retirement party.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So
is he hosting it or is it his work hosting it?
It's at his work.
he like worked for, a big highway department.
they paved roads and stuff and so they always like threw retirement parties
there and they invited the family.
we found out later what actually happened.
We found out that, Elle was invited, but she didn't wanna go because she
had, with my dad's secretary, she worked with her previously they did
not get along, so, oh, I wonder why.
Yeah,
so
she wanna go.
She was mad
her,
so she didn't want to go.
She wasn't invited, didn't want to go.
And because of that, they didn't want you guys going either.
Right.
My dad was
like,
I can't let you go because it'll look bad.
And I'm like, how is it gonna look bad?
I'm not like another woman.
I'm your daughter.
like, I'm not the other woman or something like that.
I'm your daughter.
so that happened almost two months before my wedding.
I always usually let things side, but that really hurt.
So me and him had a talk.
I called him up two days after that happened and I was like, now that you've
had time to process everything, what you did was wrong, that was wrong.
I told him like how I felt and then that's when I brought up like wedding stuff.
Like she's acting this way, dad, she not gonna let you take pictures with me?
Because she's not in them like, what's gonna happen at the wedding?
I started to bring that up and he's like, it should be
fine, and all this other stuff.
I'm like, it should be fine.
No, it's going to be fine, because nothing is maliciously like happening here.
I don't have malicious intent.
I'm not trying to cut her out.
Meanwhile, I invited all of her friends to come to the wedding because
she is so like, jealous of my mom.
And by the way, my mom has dementia and doesn't even know what day it is.
her personality is there, but like she doesn't have the mental capacity to
understand really like what is going on.
So she would never try to make anybody feel uncomfortable.
Yeah.
She just like cracks jokes and stuff 'cause you know, of the dementia.
So, but my stepmom still has, a lot of jealousy towards
my mother and other people.
Wow.
So like, that's why I got into it with him.
'cause I was like, if this is gonna happen at my wedding, we need to
like nip this in the bud right away.
So, yeah, we were good.
my rest of my family, his own brothers were like, I can't
believe he uninvited you.
Like, this is crazy.
so fast forward to the rehearsal dinner.
I hadn't really heard much from El or my dad, before then.
I did text Elle like a couple weeks before the wedding asking her what
song she wanted to like walk out to.
And she like, you're gonna never walk down in part of the ceremony or like, in
the reception when they're like, and the father of the bride and the stepmother,
asked, I wanted to include her.
I wanted her to like, pick the song and like, I wanted her to
be included in that process.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
So, she picked her song and then fast forward to the rehearsal, I'm setting up.
everything's like chaotic.
My dad and El get there.
I asked him to bring the generator like a couple days before I forgot
this part, but on the phone when I asked him that, he like, forgot
that my wedding was that weekend.
for what?
I was like, can I borrow the generator?
because I need it to power.
I think it was like the DJ booth or something.
he was like, oh yeah, I'm not busy this weekend.
I can get it over to you.
And I'm like, of course you're not busy this weekend.
It's my wedding.
He's like, oh, oh yeah.
And I'm like, okay.
That was weird.
so that happened.
Then the rehearsal, he comes in with the generator with Al. I'm like, hi dad.
Hi Al. They like, are stone cold, don't even move a muscle in their face.
And they're just like.
This the whole time.
Yeah.
Like just mad, just like something, I don't know.
At that point I didn't know.
And so I'm like, oh, thank you for bringing the generator.
can you put it over there?
And then they walked away and then like people could tell that what happened.
And so they came up to me and they're like, are you okay?
Like, what just happened there?
And I'm like, I don't know.
I don't have time to deal with that right now.
I have so many things to set up.
we eat and then we decide to do the actual rehearsal.
'cause we rented like a property from our friends, like overlooking a lake.
we just had our own timeline.
So we just like set up a tent.
We had like dinner and then we did whatever the rehearsal.
So we're getting ready to go, walk down the aisle and practice all of that.
I'm like ready to start walking down the aisle and then all of
a sudden I'm like looking and my dad's like nowhere to be found.
And then I like turn and look and he's way back there, like across like the tent.
He's just sitting with el by themselves.
And I'm like, are you gonna walk me down the aisle?
And he like, was like, yeah, yeah.
And he like runs up, walks me down the aisle and then we practice it again.
he's like very hesitant to come stand next to me.
And when I asked him to stand like near like the rest of the bridal
party, my mom was there as well.
He like said no and like ran back down the other end of the aisle to stand
next to Al. So like he's scared of being
like within six inches of your mom?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Right.
so it sounds like him and Ella been married for a while or together
for a while now at this point.
Yeah.
it's like some new fling and your mom and him, no, why
can't you just be like adults?
Right.
Exactly.
Right.
Yeah.
No, they were married for, at this point, 12 years.
So they had, yeah, plenty of, plenty of time together.
Yeah.
I'm just, yeah, it just, every time I tell this story, I'm just like, yeah, I know.
I'm like, yeah, I know.
It's cool.
Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.
so that happens.
I we wrap it up.
I'm just overwhelmed by like, what's going on?
I'm like, I don't feel good about this.
Like, I don't feel good.
the photographer was there 'cause she wanted to practice and she came
up to me and she's like, just to let you know, you need to work on your
smile, like to walk down the aisle.
'cause look at these photos, you look miserable.
And my dad's in the photo and he's not enjoying his time.
And I'm like, oh my gosh, you're so right.
so I start packing things up, l and my dad LB lines it to the car.
My dad comes up to me and he's like, l supposed to be walking down the aisle?
And I'm like, she's not dad.
We just practiced it.
If she was walking down the aisle, we would've practiced
her walking down the aisle.
Yeah.
And he's like.
Oh, well, I thought she would be walking down the aisle
or something to that effect.
And before I could answer, my uncle, his own brother came up and my dad turned
and saw him, and then he was like, well, anyway, I'll see you tomorrow.
And then he like, oh, before I did that, I gave him a gift.
Like I was like, this is for El and this is for you.
I just got like a little plaque for her that said thank you for being my stepmom.
And for him I had like a little t-shirt made that said Father
of the bride, and I gave him the gift to give to her in the car.
And then my uncle comes up and then he walks away and then say the
same thing in front of his brother.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Weird.
And my uncle, whose name's Matt, he came up to me and he's like.
Did I hear that correctly?
And I was like, what?
That L's supposed to be walking down the aisle?
And he's like, yeah.
And I was like, yep, you sure did.
And he's like, that's a bit ridiculous.
And I'm like, I know.
and he's like, you gave her a gift and she didn't even come
up to you and accept it herself.
And I was like, yeah, I guess you're right about that.
I'm like my mind's a million times right now.
Like everything I have to still do for the wedding, this happening.
all of like, what's going off,
So, yeah.
So what wedding do you go to where the stepmom, let alone, even like,
the moms don't typically walk down the aisle, so why get so up
in arms, like offended by that?
I know.
it was mind blowing to me.
Like, I'm like, what?
so fast forward to that night.
We get back, we stayed at a, like a lake house to get ready.
so we spent the night there.
Me and my bridesmaids, my bridesmaids all had like an
intervention with me that night.
They were like, Sarah, you need to stand up for yourself.
you need to stop just like letting things go.
Tomorrow is your wedding day.
Do you wanna be miserable walking down the aisle?
and they were all like, it's so unacceptable the way your
dad and Al treated you tonight.
Like, it's not you.
It's them.
Like, they were like trying to convince me that I wasn't crazy.
And I was like, yeah, yeah, know.
we made the decision together to not have my dad walk me down the
aisle and I was gonna have my Uncle Matt walk me down the aisle.
Okay.
and my uncle Matt has been there for me.
Like, he's like my dad.
I wish my dad was Uncle Matt.
Mm-hmm.
He doesn't have any kids of his own.
And him and I have like this bond that has just been like so strong since I was born.
And so he was the one when like, my dad wouldn't be able to
show up to my sporting events.
Like, he was always there.
I owned a food truck for like five years and he showed up to every
single food truck event that I did.
he's really like, the best person ever.
Yeah.
And we almost lost him to COVID a couple years before and I didn't
think that he was gonna make it.
And so I was like.
You know what?
He's here, he is like a miracle.
And you know what?
I'm gonna have him walk me down the aisle because I think that's like what
God is telling me to do at this point.
Like mm-hmm.
this is So the next morning, we have to go and quickly set up
the little place cards and stuff.
And my bridesmaid, her name in my book about this is Taylor, but she's
my best friend and her name's Amanda.
She absolutely was like, I will send a text message to your dad so
you don't have to worry about it.
Whoa.
Yeah.
So she writes, she writes up a text message, and then she's
like, does this sound good?
And I was like, yeah.
So she basically said like, Hey, she pretended to be me in the text message.
She was like, Hey, I just wanna let you know I love you, dad.
This is like nothing personal against you.
I love you so much.
But, unfortunately with everything that happened yesterday, I've
decided to, make the decision to have Uncle Matt walk me down the aisle.
I just, I forget what exactly else was in that note or in that message,
but basically it was like, I love you and, I still want you there,
and, I just am doing this so that I can have a great day tomorrow.
So she crafts up that message and we send it to together.
And then I'm in the chair getting my hair done and my dad calls me or I say hello.
And he's like, what do you mean?
And I'm like, yeah, dad.
what happened yesterday?
Like I can't be in that same mindset for my wedding.
This is supposed to be the best day of my life.
And that definitely didn't feel like it yesterday.
And so he just went off.
He was like, well, the reason that I was me and El were like that
yesterday is because we found out that you and your sister hate El.
And I was like, what?
What?
And then lo and behold, her biological daughter, Elle's biological
daughter, who was my stepsister, she.
Got into, an argument with El and she told El that she's self-centered,
always has to have the attention on her.
She like, basically called her out on everything and then said, everybody
wants your toxic behavior to change, including Sarah and Katie, who's
my sister, my biological sister.
And so they heard that and they like took it to the next level and said
like, oh, you guys hate l That's
so well 'cause it's like if someone heard that like out of nowhere mm-hmm.
Don't you think they'd be like, I need to talk to them, or like, I need
to like look forward or something.
Not like, be like, well we heard you hate her, so we're just not gonna show up
we're gonna glare at you the whole time.
Like Right.
It seems so like juvenile to me, right?
Yes.
Yes.
at that point.
I realized when they said that, I'm like, that's why the last
couple of months have been weird.
And also they have like barely reached out to me.
So I'm like, oh, okay.
so then the whole phone call is just him yelling at me and him like
bringing up like everything from the past, just like saying like basically
how much of a bad person I am.
that was crazy.
Wow.
Yeah.
And just like listening to my dad, taking stories out of hindsight
and then like reversing them and basically creating lies.
It was just, sitting there on your wedding day, like listening to this.
My like, bridesmaids were all in front of me with me on speaker phone talking
to 'em and they were like, like that.
Oh.
And then, Al gets on her phone,
probably has on her phone.
She gets on the phone.
Yeah.
Yeah.
She gets on the phone 'cause he's like, I think you should talk to her.
And then on your wedding
day,
oh my God, yeah, this is me.
I'm getting my hair done.
The poor hairstylist is in the back.
Like, trying to be cool.
I like had to apologize to her a million times.
I felt so bad.
I'm like, oh my gosh.
and so Al gets on the phone and she starts yelling at me and saying
like, oh, I heard what I heard.
And then I'm like, okay, it's not true.
Like, I've never said that I hated you.
You and I both know we've had our difficulties in the past, meaning like
when they first got married and I like moved out 'cause I couldn't deal with it.
you and I both had our difficulties in the past, but I thought like
resolved that kind of thing.
so yeah, I kind of told her that and then she like went off on me some more
and then my bridesmaid, Amanda came up.
And was like, Sarah, you are not dealing with this anymore on your wedding day.
And she grabs the phone from me and she goes in the other room and she says,
you can hear her saying L, hello, L.
And L's still talking like she can't hear.
So she's just going off.
She's just going off.
Yeah.
And she finally, you hear Amanda go up and then like silence.
And then she's like, Sarah's gonna walk down the aisle with Matt.
If you have a problem with it, then too bad you can show up or don't show up.
I don't care.
And then like you hear El hang up and then Oh, and then you hear, you hear
Amanda just like, that's right bitch.
And then she's like, and she's like, she's so funny.
She's just like, yeah, and that's what I thought or whatever.
And then I'm sitting there like shaking.
'cause I'm like, what just happened?
Yeah.
all of my sister's crying.
All of my bridesmaids are I'm like, feeling so bad for my bridesmaids too.
'cause I'm like, could probably come from normal families.
Like, you know, they've never seen this, like in my mind at that time.
I'm like, oh my gosh.
So, He ended up not showing up.
He texted him and my, husband Bernard were very close.
they would do stuff together all the time.
And he texted Bernard before our wedding and said, Hey, I'm sorry I can't make it.
And Bernard thought it was a joke.
So like, when we're doing our first look, but he
doesn't know what's going on.
Yeah.
He doesn't know what's going on.
Oh my.
And so Bernard is like, your dad is like really bad at dad jokes.
and I'm like, oh no, that's not a joke.
And then he was like, what?
And I'm like, yeah.
He's not coming.
he's not coming.
he didn't show up.
And, none of her, friends, like I had a whole table not show up because
all of, she like told all of her friends not to show up to the wedding.
Her friend, her best friend's son was our dj.
and he showed up.
but because he knows l and he came up to me and he is like, I'm
really sorry what you went through.
My mom told me what happened.
he's like telling the story of way that she heard it, which was not accurate,
but he's like, I know wasn't it.
'cause he's like, El did the same thing at my wedding.
he told me that like.
He like, I guess like yelled at his wife at the wedding or something.
I don't know.
But like at the time I was like, what?
Like, I'm like sitting there at dinner when the DJ comes up to
me and I'm like, she did what?
So it kind of made me feel better though.
'cause I was like, oh my gosh, at least I'm not the only one, like that
sees her side like her true side.
Because for a while, I would like my whole family, like my sister and my uncles and
I were not separated, but like I would be on like my dad and ELs side side.
I don't wanna say like that, but like, basically I would go over there for
holidays and then I would show up later to the rest of the family's holiday.
'cause they didn't have holidays together 'cause they didn't get along.
And so I'm like, was like the middle ground and like they were trying to
tell me like all the things that like weren't acceptable by my dad and El.
And then finally like, I was like, you know what?
I see what they're saying now.
I see what's going on.
This is very toxic behavior.
And after that I realized that's very narcissistic.
I didn't really know Narciss, like I've heard the term narcissist before
and I've like seen like in like relationships, like where the guy is like
a narcissist to the girl, like girlfriend.
But I've never seen it like parent, like parent wise.
And I am like, oh, well, nope, that's it.
You know?
Yeah.
And the fact that she instantly made it like victim mode where like you said,
you don't like me, so you're terrible.
Not like.
Not understanding that like maybe someone doesn't like you
because of how you treat them.
Yes.
Like she can't look inward to be like, how have I treated 'em?
Yes.
And then for your dad to just go along with it and just be like, well, she
said so I'm just gonna go with her.
It's like, this is your daughter and your daughter's wedding.
Yeah.
I know.
And I am convinced, he's like brainwashed, I guess is the best word for it.
my husband always says too, like, he's the one that has to live with her every day.
And unfortunately, he's probably picking his battles.
Like, is he gonna go against his wife that he has to deal with every day?
Who knows what she's capable of?
Yeah.
Or is he gonna like side with his daughter who like, doesn't see him like that
often, And so it's really sad to say it like that, but he like had a point.
I was like, yeah, that's, that's true.
I guess, but not, yeah, it's not either way.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's
not great.
It's not okay either way.
It's right.
Yeah.
I feel like it's like, on the outside, it's, it's easier for, not easy, but like
for us to look at it and be like, all right, I guess, that's the situation,
but, if my, partner was telling me, uh.
That about my daughter or like, you know, I'd be like, excuse me.
You know?
Yeah.
Like, yeah, I don't know.
I always, I always wonder about stories like that because I'm like, it breaks my
heart when they like get, like you said, brainwashed by someone and it's like, what
does she have that's so great that like, you can't see everybody else in front of
you saying she's the problem over here.
Yeah, exactly.
I really don't know what it is other than the fact that like, when they
first got together, like when my dad and her first got together, things were
a little rough because like, my dad was actually in the middle of dating
someone who had cancer and she was like stage four he didn't want to like.
I guess he was like a coward in that way.
Like he didn't wanna break it off with her.
there's so many little stories to that that's like a whole nother hour.
But basically I guess Elle had trust issues coming into that
relationship because they got married so fast and she didn't realize
like everything that was going on.
And so what I think is happening is that like he married her legally and
realized how like kind of crazy she is.
possibly is scared that like she'll take everything from him if he like
divorces her and stuff like that.
I've thought about that.
me and my uncles talk about like things like that, but I don't know.
I don't know why my dad, is like that at all.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I guess we never really fully know or always know the full story, but Yeah.
Yeah.
Wow.
Yeah.
So that kind of inspired your first book or not inspired, that's partially
in your book, invisible string.
so there's two parts to it.
So this one that I showed earlier is my first book.
This is the one like about like how my husband and I met each other and how
like we've always been connected since we were little and we didn't know it.
so this is more of like a feel good book.
The second book I don't have in here, it's the invisible string too, and that's where
all the drama happens with my wedding.
So.
Okay.
and this book, I start, it's like my journal entries and I start talking
about wedding planning in this book and then it carries on to the second
book where my actual wedding happens.
And it's like all the drama from that.
So you can see like into my mind, my journal entries are in there
of like when it happened and yeah.
And unfortunately my dad still hasn't.
Talk to any of us.
Like he cut off contact with me.
My sister, my uncles, he cut off everybody.
And I've wrote him letters.
I've done a lot of healing.
I've debated the no contact thing for a while.
And then, decided, you know what?
I, I think talking is always the best Communication's, always
the best communication is key.
We wouldn't be here, we wouldn't be in this predicament if they
just communicated with me and asked me like, did you say that?
Or like, whatever.
Right?
So I was like, you know what, I'm gonna do that.
She wrote a letter, didn't hear back, have called him, haven't heard back.
I'm just like kind of on my own healing journey.
I've been really in my healing journey this past year, but now
it's like getting to the point where it's like, all right, I'm good now.
you know what, I'm no contact from his side, I guess.
And, it's his loss at this point.
Yeah.
You know?
Yeah.
So true.
and it sounds like at least you have, your uncle Matt and your sister and you know,
and you, people around you that support you and love you and not saying any of
that's gonna fill a void or whatever, but I'm sure it's like helping with the peace
of like, okay, I have Uncle Matt who's been a father figure my whole life and
Yeah.
And it really is your dad's loss because that's just, it's disappointing on so many
levels that someone can be brainwashed so easily and forget their family like that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And what is really like a positive experience out of this is that by
sharing my story, and I did a whole skit on my book, I turned both of my
books into skits, like long form skits.
What's really positive about it is like how many other people who have gone
through the same thing and they are like, you really, made light of something that
I didn't even know that was like, that was like an option that I could like do.
Or, they didn't feel alone.
I keep getting messages like that.
I don't feel alone in this.
I thought I was going crazy, but I'm not the only one.
And it's really nice to hear those messages that, my books have helped
people and, they can relate to them.
'cause it makes me feel less alone too.
Like, oh my gosh, I'm not the only one that goes through this traumatic stuff.
especially during like a wedding, you the wedding for me was like such a big deal.
Like I was so excited to plan my wedding and then like all of this
happened it was like, okay, it was like kind of a wake up call for me.
'cause I was like, maybe I put too much like, what's the word?
Like expectations?
Yeah.
On my wedding and like maybe that it allowed me to be grateful to be in
like, the present moment and to really value like my actual friendships and
the relationships that I did have.
my bridesmaids who came to bat for me.
They were all there for me.
I may not have had a dad walk me down the aisle, but I had my uncle
Matt and my girl show up for me.
And that like, really made me realize how grateful, I should be for all of them
and how thankful I am for all of them.
Yeah.
It's like, I feel like we hear a lot of times like in these big events that,
People show their true colors, right?
And so, like, people that are jealous of you or people that have animosity
towards you, it will show in these like high tension moments, right?
And so with them, yeah, it showed, it really showed,
and they could not handle it.
Mm-hmm.
But everyone else, we don't talk about enough about like, or it
shows that it lifts people up and it shows the positive people in
and influences your life as well.
So I feel like, that's something we were saying too before recording, is I feel
like these stories allow people to connect and also like learn from them or mm-hmm.
see it from a different perspective.
Like maybe the dad, a dad.
And another story is watching your story and being like,
oh my gosh, I was an idiot.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I'm gonna go talk to my daughter.
I was too, because I've had moms message me like mom's, I should say.
Like, that would be like my parents' age.
grandmother's.
They'll message me and they'll be like, when I first saw your content,
like some of it, like, not offended them, but they'd be like, oh, it
made me like think a little bit.
And they're like, but I've learned so much about like how to like communicate
with my adult children and how to do this differently and how when I'm overstepping.
And like I've got like a heartfelt message that was thank you for that.
And I was like, I never even realized that.
So you could think maybe I'm helping another woman in this situation.
Or maybe like someone else is watching, being like, oh my gosh, I'm
not gonna be the toxic stepmother.
I wanna be more encouraging.
So yes, there's a lot that could come from it.
Yeah.
That is so true.
I actually never thought of it that way.
Like I never thought about that part of like someone who is maybe the
toxic mother-in-law or the toxic father or the bridezilla, like
watching our skits and being like.
I just did that and maybe I need to change, like you're totally right
and I hope that that does happen.
I I would love to hear stories like that actually, where they're like,
oh, I realized that this happened and it made me be a better person.
Yeah, think about like when things happen in real life, you know, it's so much more
like nuanced, but you see something on tv.
Mm-hmm.
And you're like, oh my God, that's outrageous.
I would never do that.
But then you like kind you can be like, oh, but you kinda like
relate it to your own life.
So I feel like if we're able to see it play out in a
different way, we're like, wait.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
Yeah, I know.
And I feel like.
I know like when you do your skits and when I do my skits, we like we're very
much like with, very detailed with the dialogue and so like I've gotten
that comment before where people are like, oh my gosh, my mother-in-law or
whoever has said like the same exact thing to me or something like that.
it's cool to like flip that around and being like, I wonder if
people who are in those positions.
Hear what we say in our skits and think I just said that exact same sentence,
maybe I need to change kind of thing.
So yeah, like, oh, I didn't realize that was so toxic
to say, or,
yeah.
Yeah,
yeah.
Yeah.
I think there's a lot of learning that comes out of the skits, oh yeah, for sure.
Yeah.
Oh yeah.
I think so too.
Thanks for sharing that.
I know that was like, I'm sure that's a lot to like go through and
retell, but I think that's awesome.
Yeah.
Send me the links to your books too.
We'll talk about it after, but like, and we'll put the links
to your books in the show notes.
I feel like listeners would love your book as well, because like,
they love the romantic stories.
They love like the drama.
They love a good mix.
So definitely share those with me.
We'll put them.
Okay.
Yeah, absolutely.
okay, before we get to the follower submission.
Why am I saying that?
Weird story submissions.
so this is Red flag versus green flag.
here we go.
The groom's sister demands to be a bridesmaid even though she constantly
argues with the maid of honor.
Ooh.
Yeah.
I would say that's a red flag for sure.
but like we were saying earlier.
there's always two sides to every story.
And this is like the stuff that I take, and I'm like, let's think
about it from both perspectives.
at first you present a skit to be like, the sister of the groom
demands like to be a bridesmaid but argues with the maid of honor.
But the maid of honor, you show like the other side of what's really going
on and like maybe the maid of honor is doing some evil stuff or whatever.
Some like how I would flip it would be like.
the groom sister is actually trying to save the wedding because the maid
of honor is trying to like, sabotage ITT or, or something like that.
Yes.
It's all about how you word it for No, totally.
Yeah.
I've even had skits where people like, hate one character at
first, I see their comments.
I'm like, oh, just wait.
Just wait.
They're gonna find out.
And then I'll like completely twist it and they're like, wait, what?
Oh my gosh.
I thought I liked, because I'm just like, you never know from, mm-hmm.
Look.
Yes.
Oh my gosh, that's so funny.
okay.
A bridesmaid insists on bringing her toddler to every pre-wedding event,
even though the bride said No kids.
Red flag.
Yeah.
Like we said earlier, if it's like a one off thing, like, oh, I Sit or canceled or
whatever, I'd be like, yeah, that's fine.
I think my baby shower and bridal shower, I kids or whoever wanted to bring their
kitchen to come of course, but mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Every wedding event, and they're like, oh, can't, they're just coming with me.
It's like, okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Especially if it's every time like, oh, disregarding the
bride's feelings for everything.
I'm just gonna bring them because I didn't plan ahead or whatever.
Yeah.
Yeah,
exactly.
the Maid of Honor gives a 10 minute speech that turns into a story about her
breakup and how she learned to love again.
Oh, red flag.
Oh
gosh.
Like mattered What way You look at that, that's a red flag.
10 minute speech.
Red flag.
No, I'm just kidding.
My sister actually gave like a 10 minute speech.
It wasn't like that, it wasn't like that.
But she gave a 10 minute speech that was like, talking about all of our
like memories and stuff at the wedding.
she did that because she added on more after like, the whole thing blew up.
So she was like, let's make this like a good vibe.
Like remember all the good memories kind of thing.
So
yes.
No, that's good.
That's, you need someone like that that's gonna like really like think on their
feet and flip their vibe completely.
I've definitely heard of a few like situations like that.
okay, last one.
The photographer rearranges the entire timeline because they know
what works best for lighting.
Oh.
I would
say red flag at first.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Red flag probably.
But yeah, red flag.
I'm thinking about like putting the time into like my timeline and I'm like, if
anybody changed that, I would be so upset.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
Red flag.
See, I cares about the lighting.
I have a weird, perspective on this one is because, okay.
My photographer did my timeline, so before the wedding, oh.
Like I could finalize some stuff, but like, we did, like,
my photographer was amazing.
I don't even know if photographers did this, but we sat on the call for probably
like two hours, an hour and a half, putting the whole timeline together.
And she's like, okay, these photos, if your wedding's at, I think it
was like we had an early wedding, three 30 or four 30, I think four 30.
She was like, then we should do photos here.
Your couple's photos here.
If we want nighttime photos, they should be here.
So like, we kind like planned around it.
Oh, okay.
But, so yeah, I was like, so If she moved it, I'd be like,
okay, You know what you're doing.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah, see that would be green flag like that whole thing.
That's really awesome that your photographer did that.
That's amazing.
I know.
yeah, I don't think that's typical, but she was like, I always get together with
my bride and groom the week before and we just go over the full timeline and she
like sent it to, she typed it as we were like talking and she sent the whole thing
over to us, so then I just kinda like updated from my brides and bridesmaids
and groom went and sent it out, so.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
That's really cool.
All right, let's get to this week's story submission.
I'm a little raspy today, so bear with me.
Oh yeah, I understand.
I don't know.
Where are you from Krisa?
I'm from Chicago Suburbs, but I live in Wisconsin now, so.
Oh, okay.
Yeah.
Snow lots.
Lots of snow.
Yeah.
Yeah, so it's just been like, we got what?
I don't even know.
Like 10 inches maybe over the weekend.
Oh, okay.
So it was like, it was like a blizzard.
Yes.
I live in upstate New York.
Right.
Like two hours from Canada, yeah.
Snow here too.
So, and I woke up this morning, I was like, oh my gosh, I hope
this clears up before the podcast.
I know.
Plus I feel like, I dunno if you feel the same way, like you're just
with filming and all that stuff, you're just talking all the time.
Mm-hmm.
So there's some days, like I've lost my voice more in the last couple
years than I think I ever have.
Mm-hmm.
Because it's just like recording podcasts.
I do YouTube and then skits.
I'm just like, okay, need to drink tea.
Yeah.
So there's always that desire.
'cause like, I'll be like, okay, I'm not gonna do a skit today.
Like, I need to take the day off and I'll just post for the podcast and then I'm
like, oh, they really want the next part.
I'm like, I don't wanna let them down.
Okay.
I'll film the skit and then my husband will be like, rest your voice.
I'm like, I gotta get it done.
Yes.
Like always back here.
do it, do it.
I can relate.
Yep.
Anyway, okay, here we go.
Love your videos.
I'm happy to share my own crazy wedding story from 2021.
Feel free to use it however you'd like.
My husband and I were supposed to get married in 2020, but obviously
the Global Pandemic had other plans.
We ended up getting married at the courthouse that year and
rescheduled our full wedding celebration for the following summer.
Since we'd already made deposits and everything, we crossed our
fingers that we'd actually be able to have it in July, 2021.
By April, we were still holding out that hope.
The governor finally started reopening things, allowing events
again, but only at half capacity.
Venues could even be shut down if they went over.
We had already planned for an intimate wedding.
Our original venue capacity was 84, they reduced the number
to 42, which included us.
That meant that we had 40 guest spots total, so we had to be strict about it.
Originally, our guest list had 50 people, so we had to make some tough cuts.
We did get to invite many friends, but it was mostly entirely family.
It was almost entirely family.
After days of pouring over the list, we finally narrowed it down.
While working on that list, I messaged my sister for context She lives outta
state and had been dating a guy with a younger daughter for about six months.
When we got engaged, she'd asked early on if he could come, and since that was
pre pandemic, I'd said, sure, no problem.
Oh, here we go.
Here comes the drama.
Here comes the drama.
when it came time to trim the list, I checked with her to see
if he was still planning to come.
I'd never even met him, but if she wanted to bring him, I would've kept his spot.
It just would've been an easy cut otherwise.
She said he was still coming and then asked if his daughter
Violet could come too.
We'd already decided on a no kids rule except for my husband's niece and nephew.
Funny how we were just talking about this
Yes.
Who were a part of the wedding party.
So I told her Violet couldn't come and suggested that
Violet's mom could keep her.
during the trip, my sister immediately freaked out saying, if Violet couldn't
come, she wouldn't come either.
If your boyfriend's daughter can't come, the boyfriend that's never met
your sister, you're not gonna come.
That's wild to me.
that is crazy.
Yeah.
What, you're not
All right.
And also talking about communication.
Not even being like, okay, you know what?
Let me talk to him first and let's see if his ex-wife or
whatever can watch the daughter.
Yes.
Just immediately freaking out.
Yeah, immediately.
Like like we were talking about communication,
right?
Like Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Okay.
It was something different where like she lived in state and she'd met this
little girl many times and she's like, okay, she's kind of like a niece.
Let's have her too.
But like, she's never met her.
Right.
So it also would probably be easier for her to, I mean, I don't know
the ex's situation, but Right.
You know?
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
Wow.
Okay.
Um, all right.
Honestly, I didn't care whether my sister came or not.
That was her choice, but I knew my mom would take her side as
always, and of course she did.
When I told my mom who was paying for the venue, she freaked out too and told me
I needed to figure out a way to make it work, because that's your sister's family.
Nevermind.
I didn't even know this kid or her dad, that we were already
struggling to fit everyone in still.
I told her I would look into it.
We went back over the list there was just no way to make it work without
cutting close friends or choosing between cousins in the same family.
So I told both my mom and my sister that we couldn't justify adding Violet.
I also said that once we got RSVPs, if anyone declined, we'd probably
have the space, which I feel like that's a good response, right?
Yeah, that's a good like backup plan.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That wasn't good enough.
My mom threatened to pull out of the wedding completely.
No payment, no attendance over this.
Now, the mom, the mom, the mom,
what did
it say?
If the mom knew the daughter?
Did the mom it do so far?
It did not say no.
Oh, okay.
But she keeps referring to it as her family.
Family.
Okay.
So I don't know if they're
like all like, let's see.
So it sounds like.
2020 when they originally got engaged, or 2019 when they
originally got engaged Uhhuh.
So she's been with this guy for maybe a year and a half, two years by this point.
Okay.
Huh?
I don't know.
gosh.
What?
Oh my gosh.
My sister accused me of playing favorites because we made exceptions
to the two kids in the wedding party.
That's pretty normal though.
Yeah.
What Then she told
me I was dead to her.
At that point, I'd had enough.
I told her that was her choice and she could consider her invitation revoked.
Oh God.
Uninvited.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
you're done uninvited, but you gotta like, not saying I
support, being like, you're done.
But I'm like, you gotta applaud her for being like, two can play that game.
Yeah.
Because I think, I think half the time when people threaten things like that,
they would just want you to change it.
Like they don't, they're not gonna actually follow through.
Yeah.
They
want you to, they wanna get their way.
Yes, a hundred percent.
I will back you up on that one.
Yeah.
I've seen it happen so many times.
I feel like there's so many empty, like, threats out there.
' cause they know they can take advantage of someone.
They're like, if you don't do this, I'm gonna do this.
So they're like, I just don't wanna even risk the chance
of that happening, you know?
Right.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Cue my mom's next meltdown.
My sister had always been the favorite and this just proved it again in the end.
My sister didn't come to the.
My mom eventually gave in at the last minute.
One of my aunts also took my sister's side and didn't attend though, to be fair.
I think it had more to do with her finding out my uncle was
cheating than our own drama.
Okay.
Whoa.
I think that was separate.
Okay.
That's another, thing.
Once those people took themselves off the list, I actually got to
invite a few people we wanted there.
Oh.
And as a cherry on top, my mom also tried to get me to cut my stepmom's parents,
even though they'd been in my life for 20 years were helping pay for the wedding.
Obviously I refuse.
I don't get the whole like telling someone, you have to unin invite
or invite someone to the wedding.
It's like, that's not how it works.
It's not your day.
No.
It's not your day at all.
And also, of course, the mother would target the stepmother's family.
I feel like there might be some jealousy or animosity there or something.
Story, she's story like by her parents.
It's like, if they've been in her life as grandparents for 20
years, I think it's acceptable.
Oh my God.
What?
That's s so of course the mom was never, the mom was always gonna show up.
I feel like.
Yeah.
unless you're my dad, why are, how are you gonna, how are you gonna
miss your daughter's wedding?
You know?
and now to be like, put this wedge even more between the sisters,
because it sounds like they're already kind of like far apart, like they
live in different states, but the fact that they're, I don't know.
It's, yeah.
so she says, for weeks afterward, my mom kept pushing me to apologize to my sister,
even though I'd done nothing wrong.
I told her I I wouldn't, and that my sister actually owed me an apology.
We didn't speak for months after the wedding.
And even now, four years later, we barely talk.
So yeah, that's my story.
Use it, tweak it, or do whatever you want with it.
Oh, oh
my gosh.
did she mean her and her sister barely talk?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
That's, that's really sad.
we're talking about like looking at both perspectives, right?
And so like, I I could see where the other sister would be hurt.
'cause like, let's say she's been living with this guy now, what did she say?
She met him in?
it was pre pandemic.
When she'd asked early on.
So it would've been like 20, yeah.
2019. 2019, right.
Yeah.
So at this point they'd been together, let's say at mo at the
very most, it would be two years.
Okay.
But probably not even, maybe a year and a half.
Yeah.
so for the sister, like she's been living with this guy for a year.
Maybe the daughter comes every other week.
Maybe she like, takes care of the daughter mostly.
We don't know.
so I could get feeling hurt for sure.
Like if you're like, this is my family, family.
This is my almost stepdaughter and my boyfriend of two years.
But to make that be like, the hill you're gonna die on?
Yeah.
Right.
Of course it would be easier for her just to like invite, but I don't know.
It's, yeah.
I know, it makes me wonder if like she and her sister have like some sort
of back history of like just sibling rivalry kind of thing going on too.
maybe, I don't know.
that's how I think with the whole skits thing, but that would not be
the hill that I would wanna die on.
Me and my sister, we are best friends, but we also are like tough critics too.
So like, know, we've had a little bit of sibling rivalry going on, but I
would never Ever not show up to her wedding if she told me that I couldn't
bring my significant other or my child.
Actually, so Amanda, the girl I was talking about, my bridesmaid, she's more
of like a sister to me, and she had her wedding during the pandemic, and she
asked me to, come by myself he was just my boyfriend at the time, actually.
But was like, of course, that's no problem.
I'm gonna be there for you.
I understand because of what's going on.
I know you would have him there if it wasn't the restrictions.
I know it's outta your control, Yeah.
I would not choose that as my hill to die on.
Yeah.
I'm even thinking like, let's say my cousin who's like a sister to me, like
she lives in another state, let's say.
Like she's getting married and was like, we're not doing any
kids, so your daughter can't come.
I don't think I'd be offended by that.
Mm-hmm.
Like my blood daughter, I would be like, okay, either I can make it work with a
babysitter or I can't, and be, I either fly with someone to watch her in the
hotel room or I can't make it work.
I wouldn't be like, oh my gosh, how dare you like not invite her.
Do you hate her?
Like, ' cause it's not that personal.
Yeah.
Like it's not personal.
There's just some places that I feel like aren't meant for kids sometimes.
Yeah.
People just don't want that vibe and, that's okay.
Like when people get up in arms in the comments about it, they're like,
oh, well, wedding's a family event.
And I'm like, sure.
But it's also a party.
Yeah.
It's alcohol.
Mm-hmm.
I mean, so it's teach their own, like, you wouldn't bring your
child into an R-rated movie.
You wouldn't bring your child to like a nightclub or, you know, there's certain
places and if that's the vibe you want for your wedding, that's the beauty of it.
You get to pick what vibe you want and Yeah.
but yeah, it's like you can't be like up in arms about.
Or mad at the bride for wanting it a certain way, you know?
Yeah, exact.
Exactly.
Like whatever the bride wants.
that's like kind of been my motto is like, whatever the bride wants, is like what
you respect, I guess, or I, shouldn't even say the bride is the couples that
make those decisions together too.
And so whatever they want, respect that.
Obviously I've seen crazy things happen, but I'm talking about like the people
who are like, like the no kid weddings or like other decisions that they make.
Like I've seen like the dry weddings as well.
we kind of Yes.
That's a whole, like controversy as well too.
So Yeah.
If you want to support them, respect their wishes, otherwise just say no
thank you to the invite, I guess.
Yeah, that would be, that's kind of like what my motto would be for that.
Right?
Because yeah, again, it's like the entitlement because like,
she didn't even try to like.
See if they could find someone to watch the child or like, how about we all
fly together and then he just stays back with her while go to the wedding.
You know, like, yeah.
It was anything like that.
It was just freaking out on the bride immediately.
Yes.
And making it her problem.
Change your rules for your wedding.
'cause I'm bringing Yes.
And like that doesn't sit right with me because I'm just like, there could have
been so many other ways to go about it.
if she was like, Hey, actually, like he has sole custody and
we, can't rely on the mom.
Okay, well how about you come here and she can come to this, you can
like, communicate through things.
it's just demanding.
I don't like
Yeah, a hundred percent.
Like if she would've, instead of texted back the demand or like the awful things
she could have said, Hey, let me talk to him and see like what options we have.
Do you have any other options on your end?
could you go to the venue and say, Hey, is there something that we could do?
I don't even know what the, 'cause that was like a mandatory, mandate,
but, I'm just thinking like, is there something that she could do on her end?
Like, like you were talking about, it's just all about communication and Yeah.
When you come at someone and just start yelling like that
doesn't end well for anybody.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That just starts off all on the bad foot.
Yeah.
Well, that was
a, a wild story.
All right.
Yes.
There's no listening what you think about that.
All right.
I always like to end these episodes with some confessions people send me.
They all have to do with weddings and stuff, so, oh, okay.
Here we go.
All right.
moved across the country hoping it will help my husband limit
contact with his toxic mom.
Oh.
Keep us posted on how that's going.
Okay.
Yes, exactly.
Oh my goodness.
I hope that the toxic mom is not gonna follow you there.
That's like what I think of, I'm like, I hope they don't gonna move
there.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I feel like at the end of the day too, it has to be him
that limits the toxic mom.
Like,
yeah,
not answer certain calls or talk to her?
It's not, yeah.
Yeah.
this says currently terrified that my brother and sister-in-law will
announce their pregnancy at my wedding.
Would that terrify you if someone were to announce their pregnancy?
that would not actually, I would be the one to be like super happy,
especially if like they've been like waiting for it for a while, like.
That would be just me though.
that wouldn't bother me.
An engagement on the other hand, I think would bother me a little bit
more than a pregnancy announcement or a
proposal at your wedding.
Yeah, that's what I meant.
Proposal.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, I feel like it's like, depends on like how they would do it.
If they like, were just like, Hey, you wanna let you know?
I'd be like, I'd so happy for you.
That's awesome.
If they were like in a speech, just so you know, we're having a baby.
It's all about That's true about relationships and I
think like how you go about it.
Yeah.
Because I did get a story sent to me once where, the whole like.
Engagement.
It was like a one upper kind of thing, right?
With the two siblings.
And the mom wanted to do a grand gender reveal at the wedding they
were like, no, like they wanted like balloons and then they saw, and one
of the bridesmaids saw the mom loading boxes of balloons into the car.
And they were like, these are staying out here.
And then they like did a big thing at their table.
she would not say no.
She wanted her moment of like announcing that she was gonna
be a grandma at the wedding.
That's like a, Madison Humphrey, like I can see Madison Humphrey taking that.
Yes.
And being like, oh my gosh.
Wow.
Yeah, I can, yeah, that's on hand.
Yeah, no, I was thinking like, it would be more of like they would be
like over in the corner, like at the bar or whatever, and being like, just
let you guys know we are pregnant.
kind of like talking to their family.
Not like a whole shebang, balloons and stuff.
Holy cow.
Right.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
So I wonder if this girl has like a hint that something big
is gonna happen or I don't know.
Mm-hmm.
Good luck, girl.
Yeah.
Let us know or let Krista know what happened.
Yes.
Let us
know.
okay.
This last one says, sister-in-law to the bride called the pastor and
said he shouldn't marry the couple.
Yikes.
Why are we doing that?
The sister-in-law called the pastor and told him that he shouldn't marry them.
What?
Wait, is the Confession is coming from the bride or the sister?
No, it just
says, it's just says The bride's sister-in-law called the pastor.
So I wonder if it's just like things that people like, oh,
okay.
Ah,
that's
why.
Wow.
that's, I wonder why, I wonder what provoked that.
I, I feel like maybe infidelity, I don't know.
Or just doesn't like her.
Yeah.
Or yeah, like the cattiness of it.
I'm so nice.
I just heard a story where a sister-in-law tried, canceling the bride's dress
like she called the bridal shop.
And pretended to be the bride and said, we will no longer need your services.
And she went around and canceled vendors and venues.
I did a skit like that once.
I can't remember the actual details, but I remember the mother-in-law
calls in and like cancels a bunch of different things and then they
show up and nothing is there.
So.
I feel like that's like a popular thing.
oh my God.
Like I like hear it all.
I hear about that a lot.
Like people like, 'cause that's why, the vendors have to have a code now.
so like when you call in, like they have to make like a special code, before you
can like, cancel anything because they've had problems with like, people calling in
and like changing stuff or canceling it.
that weren't supposed to.
That's why I know.
I never knew that was a thing until people started sending me stories and
they were like, yeah, my mother-in-law tried changing everything at our venue.
And I'm like, what?
Why do people, people do that?
Like, this is really making these skits.
I've really learned a lot about how crazy some people
are.
I agree with you.
'cause I'm like, wait, she did what?
I have to act that out, you know, kind of thing.
Like, oh my gosh.
Oh my gosh.
That's so funny.
Oh my gosh.
Well, thank you so much for coming on.
This was so fun hanging out with you.
Oh
gosh.
Absolutely.
Thank you for having me.
I was so excited to be on.
It was so fun to talk about all the different stories and stuff,
so thank you for having me on.
Yeah.
And thank you for sharing your story.
I know that was a lot probably to dive back into, but, for everyone listening,
can you share again, like where they can find all your content, your, like
your social handles, your book name, and anything else fun you're working on?
Yeah.
so my book name is The Invisible String.
I think it might be backwards, but in the invisible string.
No, it's, it's forward to me.
Oh, it's okay.
Cool.
Yeah.
you can find it on Amazon.
and then all my handles are just at Sarah Wiseman for any of my social media.
I'm on TikTok and YouTube.
I don't really go on Instagram that much.
It's just like, it's like too complicated for me, for Instagram for sure.
But yeah, I'm coming out with, so I've like challenged myself to kind
of release like a new book every, like, on YouTube is more like longer
stories where TikTok is like my short bridal stories and like crazy skits.
so I've challenged myself to like publish a book every month, and
then like kind of month act it Yeah.
Act it out on Go girl.
It probably won't be as big as this.
Not that this is big, but it like, probably will be like
short stories kind of thing.
But, Right now I'm working on one 'cause one of my best friends who was a
bridesmaid of mine, she owns a Christmas tree farm and it is so fun to work
with her at the Christmas Tree Farm.
So the next book I'm gonna be publishing here soon is actually a
Christmas tree farm story, so Oh my
gosh.
Like Hallmark story.
Yes,
yes.
I'm so excited about it.
So, and then I'll act it out and like post it on YouTube and kind
of do that monthly over there.
But TikTok will basically stay like the plot twist crazy wedding stuff and I
usually like romance, crazy relationship
stuff, all that.
I love that.
That's so smart.
That's such a smart way and fun way to like market your books too and get people.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right, well thank you so much.
We'll put all the links to all your books and everything in the show notes as well.
Okay.
Thank you,
Krista.
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