Hi Sarah.

Thank you so much for being here.

Hi Krista.

I'm so excited to talk to you today.

Yes, I'm so glad we were able to connect.

Before we get started, I mean,

there's so much drama and

everything we can talk about.

Can you just talk one a little bit about

you and your awesome brand Honey fund?

Yeah, absolutely.

So, I'm Sarah Margolis,

co-founder and CEO of Honey Fund.

We are almost 20 years old, but if

you can believe that, next March

will be our 20th anniversary.

But Honey Fund is basically a wedding

registry where couples can receive the

gift of a honeymoon or any cash, that they

need to start out together instead of, or

in addition to traditional registry items.

I love that.

I think it's such a smart idea and I

remember the first time I saw something

like that, Years ago for a friend's

wedding, and I was like, this is such

a great idea because sometimes people

live together for a while before

getting married and they don't need

the standard like dishes or towels.

And so I think it's a fun way to

contribute to, a fun time in your

friends or family members' life.

and so what kind of started the idea,

what made you think of the idea behind

it and what was the process for you?

Like when you were like, oh,

this could be something and

kind of getting that together.

Yeah.

So, when I was getting married,

planning my wedding in 2004, We

didn't need any more household stuff.

We lived in a one bedroom flat and we

weren't ready for our forever home.

So there was no point in

accumulating China and, towels

and silverware and all that.

but we did really wanna go on

a, pretty elaborate honeymoon.

We were dreaming of a trip to Fiji,

which turns out it's about halfway

around the world from San Francisco.

So expensive to get to.

And, my fiance and I, at the time,

we were just like, what could we do

that would be different from, you

know, a traditional wedding registry?

I can't remember how, but I'd heard

of the concept of a honeymoon registry

and I kind of went online to like.

Make sure I wasn't crazy and

that was an actual thing.

And it was, but it was, quite,

antiquated that the options that were

available were a little outdated and

they were very, expensive to use.

Like they wanted to charge, 9% in

fees, which to us just seemed crazy.

That would amount to a whole night on our

honeymoon, we'd be paying in fees, right?

Mm-hmm.

we just put our heads together and

kind of created our own makeshift

honey fund on our wedding website.

And our friends and

family went crazy for it.

They gave us more than $5,000.

We took our dream honeymoon to Fiji and

when we got back they were just raving

about the idea, like, how cool, like,

I wish we had this when we got married.

You know, you guys should make

this available to other couples.

And we were already

aspiring entrepreneurs.

I had a background in marketing.

He had a, software engineering degree.

And so we built honeyfund.com

about a year after our own wedding.

And, Just started, we bought a few

Google ads, for people searching

for honeymoon registry, which there

weren't that many searches at the time.

We started signing up, you know, three,

four people a day, and then it became

a hundred and then became a thousand.

And in

we were featured on Martha

Stewart Wedding's homepage,

and our site totally crashed.

Oh my God.

Oh my God.

We made it to the big time, like

somebody at Martha Stewart noticed

us and is like, this is a cool idea.

We're gonna share this.

So yeah, that's a big break.

Yeah, that's amazing.

And when you explain it that way, it's

such an amazing concept and so important

because I feel like there's still like

some misunderstanding from people, like

how it works or, and I don't know if

you've seen these comments before, people

saying like, well, I don't wanna pay for

someone's honeymoon when you put it that

way, it's like, if you love this person

and you want to give them a gift, what?

Does it matter if they spend it

on sheets in their house or they

spend it on dinner, on the beach?

You know?

Totally,

totally.

And as the gift of

experiences has become more.

Sort of commonplace and

the gift of cash, right?

With like GoFundMe and stuff.

I think it's just kind of obvious

that today's couples, you know, the

way our economy has evolved, like

you can get anything you need for

your household at Walmart for 3 88.

it's just cheap.

know, you need, a wedding registry.

You don't need your friends and

family to shell out their hard

earned cash to get you more stuff.

Everybody has enough stuff now.

but what we really crave and

what I think wedding couples

really need after the stress of

planning a wedding isn't vacation.

some memories that they'll always

cherish and, 99.999% of any giver

who's ever come through Honey Fund

has said that was so much fun.

What a cool way to give a wedding gift.

I love that.

And isn't there a stat out there,

I might be making this up, but

there's some kind of stat about like

couples that do take a honeymoon and

take the time to take a honeymoon.

either like.

Are married longer or they have happier

marriages because they start off by

focusing on an experience together.

And I might be making that up, so

maybe I should look it up later, but I

remember hearing something about that.

Yeah.

Because there's a lot of couples that,

maybe they hold, off or they, aren't

able to because of other things, which

obviously there's some circumstances

where you just can't take a honeymoon.

I get it.

They're expensive.

You might not have Yeah.

Getting time off

work, family e emergencies.

There's all kinds of reasons couples

don't travel, but that stat is actually

from H Fund's own research and the

stat is that, couples who take a

honeymoon are more likely to be happily

married more than a decade later.

And, you know, when we first, did

that research and kind of interpreted

all that, it gave me goosebumps.

I was like, oh my gosh.

Like we've been doing something

really fun and cool for, 15 years.

But we didn't realize that it was actually

related to, marital satisfaction and.

As someone who's been through divorce with

Honeymoon's co-founder and having to like,

go through the hardest thing imaginable,

that really like sunk in for me.

And I was like, I wanna make happily

ever after the reason why we exist.

And so we really started thinking

about like, how do we not only get

couples on that first honeymoon,

but keep them traveling together

throughout their married lives so

that they can, benefit from the

relationship skill of travel, right?

So like mm-hmm.

When couples take time away from the

stress of everyday life, when they take

time to focus on each other, quality time,

time to dream, time to just breathe out.

They have better relationships,

stronger relationships.

And so, we just launched anniversary

fund last year so that, this year

actually, so that couples could

continue to travel together.

The couples who miss their honeymoons

could have that opportunity to

celebrate a master anniversary

with the help of friends and family

and make that honeymoon happen.

I love that.

that would be like my advice for people,

again, if it's feasible for people,

but like to plan when you're planning

your wedding, to plan that honeymoon.

Even just get it on the books,

even if it's not right away.

Yes.

Having that date, it's 'cause it's

something to one look forward to

after the wedding that doesn't

involve anybody but your partner.

And two, it's like, it's those memories

right away as a married couple.

And, I feel like it really, like

we were talking about, it's like

we have all this stuff, right?

We just keep accumulating stuff

year after year and that just

really brings home the idea of

experiences over more things, right?

Mm-hmm.

A hundred percent.

Yeah, you got it.

And so I just, I feel like it's so

important and the people I knew, I

knew different couples that year.

They were like, oh, we're gonna

wait till next year to do a

trip or we're gonna do this.

And then before you know it,

some of those couples never

ended up taking one because Yeah.

Whether they decided start having kids

or they move, or other things come up

and that things are gonna always come up.

Always.

So I think it's a way to like kind

of prioritize your relationship

and being like, okay, this week

we're setting aside our honeymoon

and that's what we're gonna do.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And also it's like this great

opportunity to like get time off

that like nobody can say no to.

Like no boss is gonna be like, no, I'm not

giving you time off for your honeymoon.

You know what I mean?

Like Yeah.

It's kind of a freebie, so you

gotta take it while you can.

Right.

but yeah, I really agree that,

Starting your marriage off, being able

to like decompress after the wedding

planning, which is really stressful.

I mean, the big day is awesome,

but sometimes you're just

kind of in shock, right?

And the next day you're like,

whoa, what just happened?

And you just need a minute to

collect yourself before you jump

right back into work and everything.

I think it's really important.

Yes.

Yeah, totally.

you hear of that, like, this didn't

happen to me, but I know a lot of brides

where they almost, depression's gonna be

a really strong word, but a lot of them

felt like, bumped after their wedding.

Yes.

Because they put so much stress and you

know, they spend weeks and months and Yes.

Planning, you're around family and

friends all the time doing this fun event

and then the day after they're like,

ah, I have nothing to look forward to.

And Okay.

Which is such a sad way to look at it.

And like, that's why I like always

tell people too, I'm like, it's

about starting the marriage.

Like yeah.

It's not all our focus on that one day.

Right.

But I think the honeymoon can really

help with it too, because that's

that thing to look forward to of

like starting your life, yeah.

Together and just no

responsibilities on the trip.

Just be Yeah,

I totally agree with you.

I think there's a lot of, bride

specifically who mourn the loss of

the wedding planning part of their

lives and the, joy and the comradery

and the community and everything

around wedding planning and many of

those actually become winning mentors.

Mm-hmm.

So that they can like, stick with it.

It was just something they

fell in love with and they

don't wanna to be gone anymore.

So.

Yeah.

I do think a lot of people find their

passion through wedding planning.

Like, they're like, oh, I love doing this.

Or they might find their hatred

about planning stuff, so they're

like, get me out of here.

So.

Before Honey Fund.

you worked in marketing for

a while, you said mm-hmm.

I think you also said customer service.

So how do you think those experiences

helped you prepare for this business

and ultimately launch this business?

Oh, that's a great question that nobody

has ever asked me before, Krista.

Oh, wow.

I thank you for that totally new question.

marketing was something that

I fell into after college.

I actually studied music as my

undergraduate degree with a minor

in German, so it was a very like,

just non-committal major, you

know, like I didn't know what

I wanted to be when I grew up.

I had a math and science background

in high school, but I didn't wanna be

like, you know, an engineer or like a

scientist and, when I got my first job in

marketing, I just fell in love with it.

I loved the intersection of

math and analytics with like,

customer psychology basically.

and so that came really naturally to me.

And so when we started Honeyfund,

I was able to bring, I went on to

get a master's degree in business

with an emphasis in marketing.

So I was able to bring all that

sort of passion and training to, and

my experience planning a wedding.

So my understanding of the

wedding industry too, to

bear in creating honey fund.

prior to that I had been in customer

service, and there's something about

customer service that I just love.

It's the idea that, you have an

opportunity to delight someone who's

frustrated with your brand to turn

them around, to make them an advocate

because you took such good care of

them to take full accountability

for any failure that they had.

that comes really, really easily to me.

and I just love the, like, the interaction

and the opportunity to serve people.

so I think all of that came

together to make Honey Fund.

it was just all about like, what would

I want, do I think would help other

couples, like have a great experience

and dealing with brides and money.

Those are two of the trickiest things

that a business can, deal with.

but we've been successful I think because

we have a really clear vision about

what it is we're trying to offer people.

A commitment to trying to be fee free

as much as possible, and a commitment to

just radically awesome customer service.

Yeah, I love that.

And so then you guys took your idea,

or you were already a business, but

then you guys went over to Shark Tank

and you were pretty successful there.

So what was that story like and how

did that kind of all come about?

Yeah, so we were just

plugging away in 2012.

I think we'd done about 200

million in gifting at that point.

this was six years after we launched.

We had just started hiring

people for the business.

We, had some customer service, folks

and we're starting to hire like

a designer and things like that.

but prior to that, we'd run it

all ourselves, just two of us.

and we got an email from Shark Tank.

And I'm not a fan of reality television.

I don't watch it for the most part.

so I really didn't know much about the

show, and my first gut instinct was like,

I don't wanna be on a reality TV show.

Like that just sounds like a nightmare.

but once we kind of dug into what

the show was a little bit more, we

were like, oh, this is interesting.

So they invited us to apply to the show.

They, somebody in casting knew

somebody on the crew who had given

a honey fun gift to a friend and was

like, that was so cool, you know?

Mm-hmm.

And talked about us to casting.

and they were looking for companies in

season six that were a little bit more

established, than like, your mom and pop,

you know, cupcake company or whatever.

Yeah.

So we applied and we got cast and we

walked into the tank in June of 20 14.

we did a deal with Kevin O'Leary.

We actually got three offers,

one from Robert, one from

Barbara, and one from Kevin.

And we took Kevin's offer and,

closed the deal ahead of the

airing date of October, 2014.

And, still partner with Kevin today.

he's been a great, asset and just a

fan of the brand and the customers.

The wedding sort of, he loves love.

You know, he actually officiated a

wedding for us on Zoom during COVID.

We did like a wedding rescue

giveaway where Mr. Wonderful

will like officiate your wedding.

Oh my gosh.

And people sharing their COVID

cancellation stories and, it was cool.

He's been a really fun partner.

Wow.

Oh, I love that.

That's awesome.

so what do you think your,

biggest challenge has been,

either like with starting up

the business or now to this day?

Like it.

Getting the business out there

or explaining it to new couples.

what do you think that kind of

challenge or hurdle has been?

Oh my gosh.

I mean, how much time do we have, Krista?

it's been a 20 year journey.

I would say the biggest challenge

in the beginning was figuring

out the monetization model.

Like we just wanted couples to be

able to get money for their honeymoon

and not have to pay any fees.

there's not a lot of like revenue

for a business and that model.

Right, right.

finding a way to continue to offer

either the lowest fees or no fees,

to couples while still being able

to, earn revenue and, employ a

team, was a very, very long journey.

And we actually just kind of

cracked the code on it this year,

with the honey fund MasterCard.

So you can now, receive the gifts.

You pay no transaction fees when

the gifts come into your wallet.

And then when you are ready to, cash

out your fund, you can move the money

to a prepaid MasterCard and spend it.

Anywhere around the globe that

MasterCard's accepted for no fees at all.

So that was a big deal,

that was like huge.

and then, couples can also cash out

to PayPal, Venmo for a small fee,

but it's the lowest in the industry.

And again, our commitment is just, we

want couples to get every cent that

they got from their wedding guests

and put it towards their honeymoon

or whatever their savings goal is.

I love that.

So that was a challenge.

the other one I would say,

biggest by far, well two that

came back to back first our split.

and when Josh exited the

business, that was really hard.

and, just emotionally difficult.

Transitioning the team, or

notifying really the team and

kind of helping them make the

transition to new tech leadership.

and then right after that, COVID hit and

our revenue dropped off a cliff overnight.

like weddings and honeymoons canceled.

but in the end, that was a catalyst

for growth for us because we went

out and did a crowdfunding raise.

and our past couples and wedding

guests who've given on the platform

our followers, Kevin's followers all

together, bought in for a $1.5 million

and, helped us grow the company from,

the wreckage of COVID to, what we're

doing today, which is 120,000 couples

a year and $80 million in gifting.

Wow, that's amazing.

I'm sure like COVID was such

a challenging time for so many

businesses, and I can only imagine

when it comes to like weddings.

Like we had a few different friends

that were supposed to get married that

year and venues just randomly closed

and they wouldn't hear any news and

vendors weren't really sure what was

going on, so I Oh, it was so awful.

Yeah, it was, I mean, that so stressful.

So many vendors and just wedding

related companies in general,

revenue just disappeared.

And some of them were on the

hook for, money that they spent

with venues or whatever else.

It was awful.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh.

before we get to, I'm gonna do rapid

fire next, but, what is your main

piece of advice for brides, grooms,

anyone getting married right now when

it comes to setting up a registry?

what is your biggest

tip, or piece of advice?

I would say like, don't be afraid to

do a cash registry or a honeymoon fund.

I know some couples are still a

little bit more traditional about it.

Or worry that their friends and

family won't, be open to the idea.

But like I said, everybody who's ever

used Honey fund, their friends and family

went crazy for it and like loved giving

the gifts and raped about the idea.

So, don't be afraid to do that.

On the flip side, I think there's

a generation of couples coming in

now that are, a little bit too,

like ready to ask for cash and just

slap in their Venmo QR code on their

invitation, and they're like, whoa,

okay, we gotta hold our horses here.

This is like from an etiquette

standpoint, like a little sticky.

and we, built Honey Fund to

really take all of those etiquette

considerations into account.

So, you know, your friends and family

really feel like they're shopping

from a registry and not just dumping

cash into your wallet, right?

So, we think Honey Fun strikes

the sweet spot between those two

and, friends and family, they

just wanna get you what you want.

You really said it at the

beginning of the episode.

Why wouldn't they wanna support

your dreams and get excited

about funding your trip?

so yeah, that would be my

biggest piece of advice.

Don't be afraid to ask for what

you want and you, it's not fun.

'cause we'll make it easy for you to

do it in an etiquette, approved way.

yeah.

For sure.

I totally agree with what you say because

I feel like still to this day, it should

not be an expectation that someone's gonna

just hand you cash or hand you money.

Absolutely.

People, of course, most people in

your, family and friends want to

give some kind of wedding gift.

Mm-hmm.

I've never personally, seen a

Venmo thing on an invite, but I

have heard of a lot of people and

like, stories people have sent me.

Mm-hmm.

And

I've seen a lot of stories about

high expectations of like, I'm the

bride, give me your money, give gifts.

Right.

And I feel like there's

definitely a right way to do it.

Mm-hmm.

Because like.

I remember when I got engaged, I was

like, I'm not, I don't expect anything.

But so many family friends were reaching

out, saying like, send me a registry.

Like before I even did it, they were

like, oh, I can't wait to, you know?

Mm-hmm.

What are you looking for?

And so people will want to, but yeah,

it's, there's a right time and a place

of like how, how to do it, for sure.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I think the biggest horror

stories around gifting come from.

A sense that the couple isn't

grateful or they expect you to spend

a certain amount of money to cover

the cost of your plate or something.

And I say like, first of all,

never spend money that you aren't a

hundred percent comfortable spending.

Never plan a wedding that you feel like if

we don't get this certain number of gifts,

we're not gonna be able to cover this.

Like, that's not okay.

if you need money to plan your wedding,

you can do wedding funding on honey fund,

you could add some things to your registry

that are gonna help you, like flowers or,

you know, open bar or whatever the costs

are, and invite your closer in circle

to help fund those, because those are

the people that are gonna help you cover

the cost to your wedding anyway, right?

and then, when it comes to, like,

gifting, strict etiquette says that's

at the discretion of the giver, that

you should never expect anything.

And if you do, It's not gonna be

good for your relationship with

your closest friends and family.

People love you the most.

it's gonna put a sour taste in

their mouths and you don't wanna do

that to everyone you love at once.

don't look at people as

dollar signs at your wedding.

Look at them as people, if you'd

rather have someone there because

they're gonna give you a big check,

then you shouldn't be inviting them.

And I feel like people get

lost in that a lot of times.

Like they think about like, oh, I

want a big wedding 'cause of this.

And it's like, no.

Like you should be more excited

to have them there versus a gift.

Yeah.

for sure.

I actually just read, I feel like I

was either a Reddit story or someone

sent it to me about getting invited

to a wedding where it clearly stated

on the invitation it said, you are

required to pay for your plate.

And it gave the cost of the plate

and they, and it was like all

these really strict rules and

that was one where I was like, oh,

okay,

that's

okay.

So

much.

We're getting a little, a

little forward with that.

To me, that sounds like, one of

those mock weddings they do for

like wedding vendors or something.

It doesn't sound like

a real wedding to me.

I can't even imagine actually.

Yeah, putting that on there.

and there's so many ways to make

a wedding happen at any budget.

We have actually a lot of templates

for low cost, a thousand dollars,

$5,000 weddings on Honeyman's blog.

you can have a wedding in a park

on a Thursday afternoon with an

officiant and you know, your 20

closest friends and family and a cake.

And you know it's not about

all the pomp and circumstance.

It's not about the decorations

or the number of people or

the chicken or the fish.

It's about you and your person

really being authentic about

like, what can we afford to spend?

What kind of vibe do we want?

Who do we want to be there?

Ultimately, like you said,

it's about the marriage.

It's not about the one big day.

And if you're only doing it before

the day, then you know, you kind

of have to ask yourself like,

what am I gonna do when it's over?

Like, do I wanna be

married to this person?

You know, those are the tough questions.

Yeah.

When it comes to getting married.

Yeah, absolutely.

Sit together and go through

what's most important for you.

What do you wanna spend more money on?

Yeah.

cause I just did like a rapid

fire recently that was like,

what's more important for like me?

It was like the dress or

spend more on the honeymoon.

I was like, honeymoon all the way.

Oh yeah.

I didn't even get a super expensive dress.

I was like, I knew wear for one day.

Yeah.

I'd rather go go owl out on the honeymoon.

Yeah.

I actually sold my

dress after the wedding.

'cause I was like, I don't

have a place to store this.

You know?

It's not like it was some

dream dress that, I loved it.

It was beautiful and I've got all the

pictures, but like, let some other

bride enjoy it for a good price.

You know, that was kind of my, yeah.

Yeah.

It's like, I

love that.

Re reduce, reuse, recycle kind

of California vibes over here.

Yes.

I love that.

I should honestly do that with

some of my bridesmaid dresses.

I have so many bridesmaid

outfits.

There you go.

Oh my gosh.

Right.

I've used them for Halloween costumes.

That's a great idea.

You know what the funny thing is

I've given away, so I've been in 10

weddings and I've given away two, and

I was literally looking for one this

year and it's one I got rid of and

I was like, darn it for Halloween,

because I was gonna, Belinda.

Oh.

I was like, oh, I had a pink dress.

And I was like, that would've perfect.

I don't know where it is.

I think I got rid of it.

Oh man.

I wanna offer one more piece of advice.

This came up recently.

Mm-hmm.

in the news.

People like wonder, like

why do I need a honey fund?

Can't I just have like a honeymoon

contribution box like on the day of

my event and just have people bring

cash or checks or whatever, which is

like, a totally legitimate question,

but it's not very secure and there are

plenty of stories of couples having all

their cash gifts stolen at the wedding.

so, making it available to your

friends and family ahead of time.

First of all, make sure that

everybody's got access to the

gift, whether they can come or not.

Second of all, it's secure.

you're gonna get the money for

free anyway, so it's not like you

have to try to skirt the system.

and you can put a QR code on your, gift

table for people who hadn't gotten it,

in ahead of time to, send you a little

bit something through your honey fund.

I love that for someone like

me, I love when couples have one

because I don't carry checks.

Yeah.

So I, yeah, I'm such a, I don't know if

I'm, I think I'm like a middle millennial.

Maybe I'm younger,

millennial, I don't know.

But I don't carry checks.

So when there's a wedding coming up, it's

like I have to make an extra trip to the

bank, or I get a bunch of cash out and

I'm like, oh my gosh, like you are gonna

have a couple hundred bucks in a card.

That's like very risky to me.

So I love when they offer a honey fund

because it's so much easier for me to

be like, just do it right from my phone.

Like, that's so much easier.

I get a card still, I put it on the table

and I write like little note, like, check

your honey fund, or you know, or whatever.

Sometimes I do that.

Love it.

but it's so much easier.

Yeah.

Sounds good.

And we had that too, like

even like a couple people that

couldn't make it to our wedding.

the day of like they were sick or their

kids were sick and they just like sent

something and then we just got like

an email and it was like, so sorry.

And then they sent their gift that way.

So it was like, even if you couldn't

be there, it's just like an easier way.

We all have access on our phones.

lot of us don't have checks anymore.

Mm-hmm.

Or carry around cash.

A lot of us don't carry around cash.

so many people now just

don't ever carry cash.

And like, I usually have a

little cash, but like, not

enough when I usually want it.

I don't have it, so.

Yep.

It's so funny.

You just have everything

with your phone now.

Yes.

Oh yeah.

The ease.

So, or like at

Whole Foods you can use your palm to pay.

I'm not into that yet, but, oh, that's

a, we'll have to look into that as a

feature for honey fund, like gift table.

Like just be with your palm, just put

hand.

Technology is wild.

It scares me sometimes, but

it's a hundred percent Cool.

Yeah.

Okay.

We are gonna go into rapid fire.

It's honeymoon, and kind of

like CEO edition, so there's

kinda like mixed in there.

Okay.

Let's do it.

Okay.

What's a realistic honeymoon

budget for most couples?

Ooh, I love this.

so I'll give you some averages and

then I'll give you some ranges.

So, average honeymoon

budget right now is $6,500.

This is a survey of H Fund couples, that

has gone up considerably since pre COVID.

Wow.

2,700 I, or 3000 I think was the sort

of typical amount to spend prior to

COVID, and a much larger wedding budget.

That's almost flipped now where

you have, $6,500 honeymoons and

like maybe 12, $15,000 weddings.

So people are just allocating a

much bigger portion of available

funds to their honeymoon.

And I think you nailed it when

you said like, yeah, we know what

we're doing for our honeymoon.

You know, a lot of couples I asked

today that are newly engaged,

Where are you gonna get married?

What month?

Blah, blah.

They don't know any of that.

Where are you going on your honeymoon?

We're going to Thailand.

Mm-hmm.

Like, they already know.

You know what I mean?

So it's interesting.

Yes.

I love that.

I've noticed that too.

I feel like it's definitely changed a

little bit and I think people are getting

more creative with where they're going.

I feel like it used to be like, my

parents' generation, it was like Hawaii.

I think everyone went to Hawaii.

Oh yes, yes.

And we even looked at Hawaii

and it was so expensive.

So we ended up doing like

all-inclusive resort.

But yeah, I just feel like there's a

lot more emphasis on realizing like.

Planning this trip is

like really important.

Mm-hmm.

Even if you can only do

a couple days mm-hmm.

Somewhere.

Mm-hmm.

Just to like plan

something a little getaway.

I love that.

Yep.

Should you save for the honeymoon

before or after the wedding?

Should

you save for it before or after?

it really depends on, when

you wanna take the honeymoon.

I'm a big fan of long engagements

that allow you to start setting money

aside from each of your paychecks

every month to kind of build a seed

fund for your wedding and honeymoon.

and then of course your H fund,

you know, contributions are

gonna help you cover it too.

So if you're planning to go right after

your wedding, I think you wanna have a

financial plan around your honeymoon,

like six months ahead of the wedding.

So what we're doing now is we're offering,

couples a 0% interest credit card offer so

that they can get that booked but not have

to pay it back until after, the wedding,

when their honey fund gifts come in.

Oh, great.

So, yeah, I think you need a

financial plan and if you can save,

one to two years ahead of your

wedding and honeymoon, absolutely.

Start doing that.

Mm-hmm.

if you know you're not gonna

be able to honeymoon until

six months or a year after.

continue to save until that time comes.

Yeah.

And put it on your calendar

just so you Yes, absolutely.

Put something or let it slide off.

You gotta

book it.

You gotta ask for the time off.

You gotta make sure everyone

in your life knows, like,

these are our honeymoon dates.

Don't plan somebody else's wedding

during this time, or whatever.

Right?

Yes.

what's the biggest honeymoon money

mistake you think couples make?

Ooh, I think it can be really easy to,

with all of the hustle and bustle of

planning a wedding for the honeymoon,

planning to fall through the cracks,

and then you maybe are scrambling to

plan it a little too late and you're

not getting access to the best prices.

So kind of making sure that you have a

honeymoon planning sort of timeline that's

happening alongside your wedding planning.

deciding early where you wanna go, finding

out the best time of year to travel there.

when flights are gonna be most

reasonable, when hotel rooms

are gonna be most reasonable.

And, planning well ahead I think

is the best way to save money in

most cases in life in general.

Yes.

But certainly with travel planning.

Yeah, I love that.

Yeah.

It's funny 'cause like one of the

weddings I was in, my friend is

such a planner that like, I think

we all booked for Her bachelorette

party was in Miami, not Miami.

Sarasota, siesta Key.

I love Sarasota.

I think we all had our flights booked.

Like she had exactly where she, like,

she planned it herself as the bride.

She's like, I found these

two houses we're gonna rent.

I found these flights.

They're like this cheap.

And like, because it was so in advance,

it was such a good price for everything.

She knew the right season to go.

She knew the right time.

Like I think we went like four

months before her actual wedding,

just 'cause the timing was right.

Wow.

so you can actually do pretty

well, especially with flights

and stuff like saving money.

Buying on travel Tuesday versus like Yes.

Last minute flights.

Yes.

yeah.

So smart and

there's so much tech now that

can tell you, it can alert

you when flight prices drop.

It can help you with like different types

of connections that can save you money.

Like, I would say definitely if

you like travel planning, like

start on it as soon as possible.

Yeah.

I love that.

I didn't ask this one before,

but we kind of talked about it,

about like having your honeymoon

as a part of your wedding budget.

Do you think those should be two separate

budgets or just like one big and then

figure out how much you wanna allocate?

Yeah, well, I mean, realistically

speaking, it's all one budget, which is

your combined financial picture, right?

And so you have to ask yourself,

when we wake up the morning after

our wedding night, how much money

do we wanna have in the bank for?

The next step in life, whether that's

buying a home or paying off debt or going

and doing a master's program or something.

your financial life never, ends, right?

You have to be constantly planning ahead.

we actually have a worksheet, it's called

the one page wedding plan, where you just

sit down and like think about, okay, how

much money do we have in the bank now?

How much time do we have to save?

How much do we expect friends and

family to be able to contribute and

then helps you allocate that financial

picture across all the different things.

And like I said, you know, what we're

finding is couples are allocating

so much more of their overall

budget picture to the honeymoon

these days than they used to.

Mm-hmm.

And a lot less on the wedding

because they just, number one,

it's like impossible to afford.

we just did a bunch of research on

destination weddings and we learned

that couples are holding destination

weddings within the US just to go

to a more affordable wedding market.

Wow, that's,

isn't that interesting?

Yeah.

And kind of then just turning that

trip into their honeymoon Probably.

Yeah.

Not nec.

No, they're not even, they're still

taking a separate honeymoon, but

they're having a destination wedding

just because wherever they live is

just too expensive to plan a wedding.

Yeah.

Isn't that fascinating?

And it's wild how it

changes from state to state.

Yes, definitely.

I'm in Wisconsin and I think they're,

I mean, we went pretty affordable

for ours, so I think, I shouldn't

say, or affordable, it was still

on the, it was still up there, but,

I hear like California or New York

price, like downtown New York prices.

I'm like, woo.

New York though.

the New York wedding industry is

almost a completely different beast

all its own and it influences so much

of the rest of the industry, I think

really unfairly, because the big

sites like the Knot and WeddingWire,

you know, are out of New York and.

It's just not real.

it's just New York.

like I said, you can do a wedding in a

public park with no venue cost, you know,

with your friend ordained online, no

efficient cost at a cake that you buy at

Whole Foods or whatever your local grocery

store like what you need is your love.

That's it.

and you can build from there.

If you kind of start with this

like, okay, what's like the minimum?

We need to do this?

And then just build from there.

Okay, this is important to us.

That's important to us.

Yeah.

We can afford that.

Yeah.

We're willing to spend our money on that.

you'll come up with something that I

think is truly authentic and fun and

unique for your friends and family and

like so supportive of your financial

picture and your future together.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

I've been to some beautiful

weddings that were like DIY.

Under a tent and it looked great.

And it's just about having that

eye and it's intimate, it's small.

Yeah.

And then I've been to huge weddings

that they spent a lot of money

and they were beautiful, but that

was what was important to them.

Right.

And it looked great and

they had the funds for it.

Right.

Right.

And I think a lot of it is like comparison

and people follow these, like, influencers

in New York and they're like, oh my

gosh, that's how much I have to spend.

Oh my gosh, I'm gonna go broke.

And it's like, no.

Yeah, you don't have to do that.

Yeah.

Actually, I'm gonna tell you a

quick little side story right now

because, I've been working with a

reporter that, writes for the New

York Times for a couple years on a

story about the real cost of weddings.

And I don't mean like the super

expensive New York weddings, I

mean everyday weddings that couples

are having that are so cool and

unique and financially accessible.

And the fact that like 30,000 might

still be the average, but it's not

actually the most common budget anymore.

that's skewed by like

very, very expensive.

Like the New York weddings

we're talking about.

and just, kind of like resetting

expectations about what it actually

cost you to plan a wedding.

The story that came out was

like, completely not that.

It was just like, this is why

weddings are so expensive and this

is where you're gonna have to spend.

And I was just like pulling my hair.

I'm like, no, it's just an unrealistic,

like expectation and it's a

false sort of like, I don't know.

I think it's misleading.

I really encourage couples not to buy

into it because it's just like any

other industry or business, you know?

Mm-hmm.

They're gonna try to get you to

feel like if I don't do that,

I'm gonna regret it forever.

That sort of emotional, sort of

FOMO based marketing in the wedding

industry really gets my blood boiling.

Yes.

No, for sure.

I work in marketing too, and I feel

like I can seek stuff like that out.

it's funny 'cause even like, some sales

stuff, I feel like my husband's so quick

to be like, oh, that's a great deal.

And I'll be like, weren't they just that?

You know, like I can, kind of

scope some of that stuff up.

Yeah, it kind of goes to like, back, and I

don't even know if they say this anymore,

but like, back to like engagement rings,

they'd be like, oh, he should spend six

months of his salary on an engagement

ring, or her dress should cost this much.

And it's just like, why are we setting

these expectations for other people?

Yeah.

Not knowing their job, their

budget, their interests.

yeah,

for me, like I just said, like my

dress was, I wanted a beautiful dress.

Yes.

But I did not wanna spend

$10,000 or $5,000 on a dress.

That just wasn't me.

I know.

And I'm so glad you mentioned

diamonds because, They have these

beautiful lab grown diamonds now

literally can't tell the difference.

Nobody would know.

Even like a moist aite is like gorgeous.

like I have a five carat moist aite

that I wear a lot, and I have to be

careful when I wear it because people

are like, damn, she's got money.

You know, if I had it to do over again,

I would, be smart about where to put

that money because we did some math

on like the typical or the, quote,

average wedding price of $35,000.

if you invested that on day one of

your marriage, you would have 1.2

million for retirement so, like that's

what you're not getting by spending

that much money on your wedding day.

When you think about it that

way, it's like a totally

different perspective, you know?

Yeah.

It makes you make different choices.

Yeah.

It's wild.

You got, it's like you gotta take

the pressure off of like take off the

blinders of what everyone's trying

to tell you to do and just yeah.

Look at what's in front of you.

Talk to your partner.

Yeah.

What do we wanna do?

Yeah.

Like, you know, everybody else.

It's definitely easy to fall into the

trap of like, well, they got married

in this palace and it was so beautiful.

And it's like, is that feasible?

Yeah.

Like, you

wanna get married there,

or,

yeah.

Right.

I mean, yes, of course we all want

to stay in the most luxurious, you

know, villa on our trips or whatever,

but like, you can have an incredible

experience and make it affordable.

And that's why, you know, on Honeyfund,

you're not gonna find that kind of

like FOMO based, marketing messaging.

You're not gonna find this whole

world of like these real weddings that

are just way out of your price point

and make you feel like less than.

We just help you share the details

of your, day, get some money

to help fund your, wedding or

honeymoon or whatever savings goal.

we have RSVP and guest management.

We try to just be like a simple

alternative to those like

mm-hmm.

Overblown wedding planning sites.

Yeah, I love that.

All right.

I got a little sidetracked

from the rapid fire, but so did

I. That wasn't rapid at all.

Yeah,

I know.

I love it.

Okay, I'll do a couple more and then we'll

get into this week's story submission.

let's see.

Do you think couples should delay

the honeymoon to save money or

take it right away and then we

kinda just talked about this, but

delay it Only if it's gonna make

it like a much better trip for

you and it's gonna cost you less,

but otherwise take it right away.

Yeah.

What's your thought on

like surprise honeymoons?

Because I've seen a couple times where

there's surprise honeymoons, whether

it's like the groom plans it or someone

a family member plans it for the couple.

What are your thoughts on that?

If it's a travel planner doing it and

they've interviewed you ex extensively

about what kind of trip you want?

Yes.

Or if you both just love to be surprised.

Yes.

Otherwise hell no.

Yeah.

That was my thought when I first

read about a story like that,

I was like, I would hate that.

Yeah.

No, let, let me plan more on that.

Unless you're both like that

personality or like I said, somebody

whose job it is to plan awesome

trips and, make sure you love it,

but not like an in-law or a friend.

No way.

Jose,

right?

Yes.

You've been on one of their great

trips and you're like, okay, I know

what they know what they're doing.

Yes.

Yes.

I'll do that.

Okay.

I love that.

Okay.

Let's get to this week's

wedding story submission.

Here we go.

Feel free to stop me at any time or

we'll kind of just pause and react.

Okay.

Okay.

Going into my wedding day, I

was honestly bracing for chaos.

Knowing my mother-in-law, I was

sure something would go down.

I'd experienced her episodes before

and let's just say I have some stories.

Seriously, let me know if you want more.

She has a long history of taking her

anger towards her ex-husbands out on

my husband and I truly thought she

might ruin our day, especially because

she was going to be there alongside

her first husband and his wife and

her second husband and his wife.

A full soap opera cast y'all.

But somehow against all odds,

the wedding itself was perfect.

Not a single issue.

Everyone behaved.

It was peaceful, joyful,

and completely drama free.

That's amazing.

I was like, you glad your job free

to.

Thanks

so much.

Story over

Krista.

It was great talking to you.

That was it.

Alright.

Yeah, yeah.

How disappointing would that be if

people are like, okay, I'm ready.

And I'm like, drama free guys.

There was nothing for the first time ever.

Yeah.

she goes until the next morning.

So at least the mom held it off

the wedding day, which is on the

wedding day, which I would say it's

pretty polite to like, you know?

Mm-hmm.

Bare minimum, but yeah.

Okay.

For some, like her, she had

gifted us a hotel room at

Embassy Suites for wedding night.

Very thoughtful.

What we didn't know, she also booked

herself a room at the same hotel.

So the morning after, my husband

and I head down for what we

think will be our first quiet

breakfast together as newlyweds.

We walk in and there she is frantically

waving from across the breakfast lounge.

We were stunned, but okay.

We go over and say hi.

She invites us to eat with her.

we didn't really want to, but

out of politeness, we sit down.

See, for me, I'm like, we all,

actually, I think my husband and I

stayed at like a bed and breakfast in

the same tone, but we ended up going

to the hotel to like go see everybody.

Yeah.

You

wanted to see these people.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It doesn't sound like this bride wanted

to see her mother-in-law the next morning.

Right.

It sounds to me like.

She almost made it sound like the

mother-in-law when she booked it, made

it sound like, oh, I got you guys a

nice room over at the Embassy Suites.

Mm-hmm.

So they're like, oh, awesome.

This is really nice.

Right.

We walk down, surprise.

Yeah.

Small talk starts and then she drops it.

So how was your first night?

We awkwardly respond fine.

What else do you say to your mom-in-law?

And then the real drama begins?

She says, I need a ride to the airport.

Mind you, there were over 20

family members staying nearby,

all flying out that day.

Any one of them could have taken her,

but she insists that we, the just married

couple must do it even though it would

add two hours to our already nine hour

drive to our honeymoon in Orlando.

We respectfully decline and offer to

pay a hundred dollars for a cab instead.

That's when she completely loses it.

Right there in the lobby, in front

of staff, in front of other guests.

She calls us selfish saying We're

ungrateful for the $300 room she paid for.

Then she tells us she's keeping

our car keys to my husband's BMW,

which she had driven the night

before until we change our minds.

So this is like a full on

like tantrum now to like go

I just, I can't even imagine like ruining

someone's morning after like that.

what in the world.

It's like she

had this planned all along to be like,

oh, I'm gonna make this hotel room for

them, so that's gonna be my nice deed.

Right.

But I'll be there.

Yeah.

they have no other choice but to drive me.

Ugh.

God, I'm kind of speechless, to be honest.

Krisa like, first of all, nobody

has any business expecting anything

from a wedding couple in the

first couple weeks of marriage.

Like they're in their honeymoon phase,

like, second of all, like I don't

imagine the mother-in-law is thinking

ahead of like, okay, well this is my

daughter-in-law now forever, hopefully.

and I'm gonna start my relationship

with her as her official

mother-in-law by being a total bee.

Like, I just don't,

yeah.

That's what always confuses me

about these kind of stories.

I'm like, don't they want to

see their son or child more?

And I feel like they don't

realize or think through that.

Like, if they act this way, they're

gonna see them less and less because

no one's gonna wanna be around them.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I think it's honestly as the

mother of, both a son and a

daughter, and having a brother too.

It's different for the

mother of the groom.

because in families, you know, women often

kind of take the lead on social stuff and

they tend to just be more comfortable with

and gravitate towards their own family.

So you're gonna find your, precious

baby boy spending less time with

you and more time with her family.

Right.

And that's just kind of the way life is.

so I think if you wanna mitigate

that, you gotta be pretty nice.

Yes.

Yeah.

if you just wanna throw a

tantrum about that Sure.

Throw your tantrum, but it's not

gonna help you make it better.

Yeah, no, exactly.

she screams it's your duty as my only

son to protect me and get me to the

airport and storms off with our keys.

Also knowing that they have to drive to

their honeymoon already nine hours away.

I know.

I'm like, I wanna buy them

a plane ticket right now.

I know, I know.

And it's not like this is

like an airport down the road.

She's, they said another two hours to the

airport, or at least one there, one back.

and, but I'm like psychologically

breaking down this woman, like

the line like, you're my only son.

You have to protect me, is exactly

what the mother of a son would be

afraid of, that now all of a sudden,

all the attention she got from her

son is now gonna go to this new

wife and she's gonna be left alone.

I, I mean look, all the villains

have a backstory, right?

Like mm-hmm.

Does not excuse the behavior, but

you can kind of see how that somebody

with not great skills, and anger

management problems would be like

acting this way if they're afraid

of losing their kid, you know?

Yes.

I love that you said that because one

of my most popular like storylines that

I'm doing the Ferris and Sloan one, I'm

doing the prequel right now of like.

The whole thing starts with she wants to

invite herself on like her son and his

girlfriend at the Time's, like vacation.

Yeah.

She's like, I wanna come.

It's like he's gonna

propose she wants to go.

And it's this whole storyline.

And so I'm doing the prequel now.

Like I did three seasons of it.

People like ate it up.

They love the story.

Oh, that's so cool.

And it's so, yeah.

It's been so much fun.

And so I'm in the prequel now, kind

of showing like how she was raised.

Oh.

And like kind of showing all that.

And that's the thing we keep

saying is it doesn't excuse the

behavior, it's just explaining it.

Yeah.

Where this, I feel like the

first season of White Lotus had a

mother-in-law like this where she

showed up on their honeymoon, right?

In Hawaii.

Wait, yeah.

I'm trying to think.

I love White Lotus.

I'm trying to think of It's the best.

It's, yeah, the first season was in

Hawaii and there was, that couple

where the, husband was kind of a jerk

and his mom shows up on the honeymoon.

And the mom was played by

somebody from SNLI wanna say.

like who was the cast?

That was the one with, Aubrey.

What's her name?

I'm so bad at remembering actors' names.

Um, Aubrey Plaza.

Yeah, she was, or was she in the second

season in, Italy, I think, right?

Oh yeah,

that's right.

Yeah.

Was

it Italy?

Wait, hold on.

Yeah.

Italy was season two.

Thailand was season three.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh.

Yes.

the one with Molly Shannon.

Molly Shannon played the mother-in-law.

Exactly.

Oh my gosh.

Yeah.

I need to go back and watch it,

but showed up on the honeymoon.

Yeah, you gotta go back and watch it.

Oh, that's wild.

I kind of forgot about that storyline,

that one was probably the best season.

It was so good.

They're all so good.

They're all so good.

Yeah.

I have to go back and watch that.

It is like a very popular trope of Yes.

That she can't distance herself.

yeah.

She can't let go of her son.

Mm-hmm.

And especially like this one, it shows

like both of her ex-husbands are there

with their new wife, so I'm sure that

adds to the like, I need you son.

Like, you're my man.

You're my guy.

Yes.

Which

is also just so creepy and weird.

Yeah.

It's that enmeshment of yes.

You can't see herself as

a separate person from.

Exactly.

she said the hotel.

Okay.

We're not even done with

the story yet.

Okay.

Keep going.

No, there's a little bit more.

Okay.

She said the hotel staff was

just standing there wide-eyed.

We go to the front desk.

The woman working had seen

everything and was incredibly kind.

We asked her to call my mother-in-law's

room since she was ignoring our

calls, so she literally ran away

with their keys to her room.

Wow.

She does.

And when my husband gets on the phone, my

mother-in-law is yelling so loudly that

people can hear her without speakerphone.

She refuses to return the keys.

At this point, we're wasting

our honeymoon morning.

So we text her, leave the

keys at the front desk.

They know it's our car.

If not, we'll file a police report.

We pack up and decide

to take my car instead.

At least they both have a car there.

As we head toward the lot, I suddenly hear

my husband say, Kat, get in the car now.

I run to the car.

And just in time to see her

sprinting towards him, and she

throws the keys at his face.

this is wild.

I'm like picturing this in like a parking

lot.

Wow.

the words that I wanna use right now are

not suitable for podcasts, but Oh wow.

Oh my gosh.

that is insane.

It's because she didn't

get what she wanted.

She thought by them

saying like she thought.

By her withholding the keys.

They'd be like, okay, you know what, we'll

take you.

They'd have to do what she wanted

and good for them, honestly, as

a team for setting a boundary.

Because issues with in-laws come up

all the time, all day, every day.

Right.

And like when it comes to a marriage,

a marriage is different than just

being boyfriend girlfriend or dating

someone because you really, really

have to have each other's back first

before anyone else in your life.

That's what makes marriage work.

And, avoid talking about tough stuff

that you're going through with them, with

your family, even a lot of your friends,

because it's gonna set up this sort of

like, me versus him, kind of a dynamic.

Yeah.

When you're really, I

love what this couple did.

They stuck together.

they called the bluff.

They were like, look, we're not gonna

let your tantrum throw off our day.

leave our keys or, you know,

we'll act accordingly and.

It worked like good for them.

That was like honestly some of the best

like training for marriage right there.

and they passed the test.

They leaped over that hurdle.

Literally they did it, they really

did handle it very well of just

being like, you know what, like

almost treating it like, a toddler.

Okay.

Yeah.

If you're gonna act that way, we're gonna

just figure out, we're gonna keep going

this way because you're just not Sorry.

You know what

I wanna do?

I don't know if you can do this, but

like I would really love to send them a

little gift and like congratulate them on

getting through that in a graceful way.

I'll have to see.

Yeah.

When they like sent it.

I do have their, this person's

information, so I'll have to

see like when they sent it.

But we have these really

sweet Honey Ben Stanley's

that we could send them.

Oh, cute.

Oh, I love that.

That's so cute.

She then storms off again.

I check on him.

We get in the car and

finally we drive off.

Still married, still heading to our

honeymoon, but absolutely stunned.

And sadly, this wasn't the last

of it over the past 10 years.

Okay.

So this was 10 years ago.

Wow.

Oh my God.

Noticed.

This was 10 years ago.

We've dealt with stunt after stunt,

emotional manipulation, dramatic

scenes, chaos at every family gathering.

But this was the first

of many wild moments.

She's thrown our way.

And finally, this year, for the sake of

our children, we've made the decision

to significantly limit contact.

Wow.

So it took 10 years of manipulation

and dramatic scenes, all that stuff to

finally be like, okay, you're limited.

I don't even know if I'd want someone

like that around my children knowing

they're gonna throw something or

It's hard.

Yeah.

It's hard

having

problematic grandparents.

The kids figure it out though, you

know, they make their own decisions.

Like, eh, we don't like

hanging out with that person.

Yeah.

I feel like kids are so in tune to people.

Mm-hmm.

That they're just like, they

go with their gut for sure.

They're not like adults where we

can kind of like smile and be okay.

They're like, no, I don't want.

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

so she just ends with saying, because

peace is better than chaos and eventually

boundaries have to be drawn, even

if it takes a decade to get there.

And then she said, PS I

love all your stories.

I relate to Sloan.

So the story I was telling you

about has Ferris and Sloan.

So she says, I relate to Sloane, which is.

Funny.

That's awesome.

Wow.

Well, that's a wild story.

the twist of the 10

years later at the end.

I was not expecting that.

That was great.

Yeah.

And I'm sure that image, is still

in her head so fresh because it

was such a high intense moment.

and I love how he protected

her too in those moments.

He was like, with her on the boundary,

he was like, I'm protecting you.

Yeah.

but I still have a lot of questions

like how you would keep, I mean,

I'm sure it's very nuanced and very

complicated, but it's like after that,

like what was the next step after that?

You know, they go on their honeymoon,

it's just like, is the mom still not

understanding she did anything wrong?

And yeah.

How you keep that going for 10 years?

It's so hard to like deal with

children in grownup bodies.

Yeah.

But I think having kids probably

gave them a new perspective on like

her behavior and like, oh, we're

just actually dealing with a child

here, and you gotta have boundaries.

Yep.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

Well, all right, well,

thank you for sharing that story.

That was fun.

Yeah.

Yeah.

That was, I mean, not for

them, but, you know.

Yeah.

It's always like a

twisted and seen coming.

yeah.

But yeah, I know we get so many

stories and I'm always just

like, they shock me every time.

It's wild.

Wow.

Wow.

I feel like a lot of people tell me

too, they're like, it actually helped.

They'll say this like, helped

me to write it all out.

They're like, I never

told anyone it this way.

Hmm.

it really helped me get through

my feelings or understand like,

whoa, this was really toxic.

Because when you're in the moment,

sometimes you don't see it that way.

Oh, for sure.

lose perspective.

Yeah.

okay.

So I always like to end these

with a couple of confessions that

people send me on social media.

So let's read

Ooh Confessions.

I love it.

All right.

It says, at my sister's wedding, one of

her bridesmaids didn't get her a gift,

and I thought that was kind of weird.

What are your thoughts on that?

Like, if you're in

someone's wedding mm-hmm.

Should you automatically get them a gift?

there's more to consider in this

situation than just a typical wedding

guest, because that bridesmaid's already

gone to some, probably considerable

expense to bring the gift of her

presence to the wedding, right?

however, and I've been in that

situation at a time in my life, in

my twenties when I didn't really

have a lot of money to get a gift.

But what I would do is I would

like, make something, or buy

something similar to what they

registered for that I could afford.

I think just the token gift, something

meaningful and like, personal mm-hmm.

Shows that you are celebrating

their, day, with a gift.

But again, gift is always at

the discretion of the giver.

And if that bridesmaid really felt like

she poured her heart and her budget

into that person's wedding, and that

was the gift, I don't really think it's

something that you can hold against her.

Yeah.

I agree.

I feel like that was so well said.

And I feel like there's been

weddings that, like were very DIY

that I was a part of, and I done

did so much, and I had the brides

be like, please don't get me a gift.

Yeah.

And even when I gave it to

them, they ripped up the check.

Like I, one in particular, she was like,

no, I'm literally not accepting this.

Aw.

And then I had other ones

that were like, same thing.

They were like, please don't feel like

you have to like, get me a gift that you

would as a guest because you've mm-hmm.

Been a part of the bachelorette party.

You bought a dress.

do think it's kind of

like, murky area there.

Mm-hmm.

If you wanna give a gift, do it.

Mm-hmm.

But I guess it doesn't feel like.

I know you do put in a lot being

in a wedding party as well.

Yeah.

And

I mean, you know, you can write the

bride and ice card and say, look, being

in your wedding has been such an honor.

unfortunately I'm out of budget for

like, something from your registry,

but I would love to give you this

handmade friendship bracelet to honor,

how much you mean to me or something.

Yeah.

You know, just anything personal.

Yeah, definitely.

Yeah,

because like, again, after my wedding,

I wasn't like checking the box of

like, oh, this bridesmaid or this

groomsman didn't get us a gift.

Like, I was so happy to be

surrounded by our family and friends.

So that was not a concern to me.

They they got the dress.

I'm like, you guys are awesome.

okay, lemme just read a couple more.

my uncle invited random

strangers to my cocktail hour.

Was that cute?

I'm like, he's like, oh, I'm single.

I'm gonna

invite some people here.

I'm gonna bring some rows.

Oh my.

Was that it?

yeah, go ahead.

yeah.

No, it's just, that was it.

Okay.

oh, okay.

My uncle our cocktail hour.

So that's like after the ceremony.

Before the, yeah.

Huh.

did they stay for the reception or

are they just like hanging out just

so you free drinks, you're not allowed

to invite your own people

to someone's wedding.

That's just a no-no.

Um, yeah, please don't

do that.

If you wanna bring a date and

the date wasn't explicitly like

a plus one on the invitation.

I've been in situations where I

checked in with a couple about that.

Like, Hey, I'm not sure

the way this was written.

Is this a plus one or not?

but you don't get to make your own.

Invitations to someone's wedding.

It's just not the way it works.

Yeah.

One of our guests quit their

job to attend our wedding.

Whoa.

That's a friend.

I mean, hopefully, or maybe it was

like they were just done with this job.

Yeah.

And they were like, you can't

take off for the wedding.

And they were kinda like, screw you.

That, that's kind of what I'm

thinking must have happened, because

I've heard of that, where they're

just like, this is my moment.

Like, I'm not missing my best

friend's wedding or something.

Yeah.

But like, obviously it sucks when you

can't be in two places at once and there

are weddings that I did not go to that I

still regret to this day not being there.

But there was nothing I could do.

I was pregnant and I couldn't fly or

don't do something like that unless you

already wanted to quit and you got a plan

to like go get another job or whatever.

And then you wanna take a few

days off to like rage with your

friends while they get married.

Cool.

all for it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Honestly, that sounds like something

I would've done like maybe in my

early twenties if I was just like

already over a toxic job or something.

Something a hundred percent.

Yes.

Like, get me out of here.

You know what, that was my sign.

Yeah.

and then you could, it's

kind of a fun story.

Like, oh yeah.

You know, I quit my job for these guys.

you tell it for the rest of your life.

Whatever.

Yeah.

True friend right here.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh.

Well thank you so much for coming on.

It was so great meeting you after knowing

so much about your brand and your company.

I just think it's great.

I've talked about Honey

Fund and Honeymoons.

so many times on the podcast of just, I

think it's such a fun concept and how like

we're just kind of changing the concept

over time of like gift giving as well.

Thank you Krista.

Thank you for being a fan and supporting

the cause and yeah, this was so much fun,

such a different kind of podcast than

I've ever been on before and I loved it.

Thank you so much for having me.

Oh

good.

And for everyone listening,

where can they follow you?

Follow Honey Fund and see

what's coming up next?

Yeah, well, honey honeyfund.com

you can download the app in the app

stores, follow us on Instagram, TikTok.

I would say we're most

active on those platforms.

And then if you're interested in,

entrepreneurship or other things like

that, you could find me on LinkedIn.

I write a lot of, content around,

running a business and, you know,

travel and relationships and

I'd love to connect with you.

Awesome.

Well thank you so much.

Thanks Krista.

Have a great day.

You too.