Hi Sarah.
Thank you so much for being here.
Hi Krista.
I'm so excited to talk to you today.
Yes, I'm so glad we were able to connect.
Before we get started, I mean,
there's so much drama and
everything we can talk about.
Can you just talk one a little bit about
you and your awesome brand Honey fund?
Yeah, absolutely.
So, I'm Sarah Margolis,
co-founder and CEO of Honey Fund.
We are almost 20 years old, but if
you can believe that, next March
will be our 20th anniversary.
But Honey Fund is basically a wedding
registry where couples can receive the
gift of a honeymoon or any cash, that they
need to start out together instead of, or
in addition to traditional registry items.
I love that.
I think it's such a smart idea and I
remember the first time I saw something
like that, Years ago for a friend's
wedding, and I was like, this is such
a great idea because sometimes people
live together for a while before
getting married and they don't need
the standard like dishes or towels.
And so I think it's a fun way to
contribute to, a fun time in your
friends or family members' life.
and so what kind of started the idea,
what made you think of the idea behind
it and what was the process for you?
Like when you were like, oh,
this could be something and
kind of getting that together.
Yeah.
So, when I was getting married,
planning my wedding in 2004, We
didn't need any more household stuff.
We lived in a one bedroom flat and we
weren't ready for our forever home.
So there was no point in
accumulating China and, towels
and silverware and all that.
but we did really wanna go on
a, pretty elaborate honeymoon.
We were dreaming of a trip to Fiji,
which turns out it's about halfway
around the world from San Francisco.
So expensive to get to.
And, my fiance and I, at the time,
we were just like, what could we do
that would be different from, you
know, a traditional wedding registry?
I can't remember how, but I'd heard
of the concept of a honeymoon registry
and I kind of went online to like.
Make sure I wasn't crazy and
that was an actual thing.
And it was, but it was, quite,
antiquated that the options that were
available were a little outdated and
they were very, expensive to use.
Like they wanted to charge, 9% in
fees, which to us just seemed crazy.
That would amount to a whole night on our
honeymoon, we'd be paying in fees, right?
Mm-hmm.
we just put our heads together and
kind of created our own makeshift
honey fund on our wedding website.
And our friends and
family went crazy for it.
They gave us more than $5,000.
We took our dream honeymoon to Fiji and
when we got back they were just raving
about the idea, like, how cool, like,
I wish we had this when we got married.
You know, you guys should make
this available to other couples.
And we were already
aspiring entrepreneurs.
I had a background in marketing.
He had a, software engineering degree.
And so we built honeyfund.com
about a year after our own wedding.
And, Just started, we bought a few
Google ads, for people searching
for honeymoon registry, which there
weren't that many searches at the time.
We started signing up, you know, three,
four people a day, and then it became
a hundred and then became a thousand.
And in
we were featured on Martha
Stewart Wedding's homepage,
and our site totally crashed.
Oh my God.
We made it to the big time, like
somebody at Martha Stewart noticed
us and is like, this is a cool idea.
We're gonna share this.
So yeah, that's a big break.
Yeah, that's amazing.
And when you explain it that way, it's
such an amazing concept and so important
because I feel like there's still like
some misunderstanding from people, like
how it works or, and I don't know if
you've seen these comments before, people
saying like, well, I don't wanna pay for
someone's honeymoon when you put it that
way, it's like, if you love this person
and you want to give them a gift, what?
Does it matter if they spend it
on sheets in their house or they
spend it on dinner, on the beach?
You know?
Totally,
totally.
And as the gift of
experiences has become more.
Sort of commonplace and
the gift of cash, right?
With like GoFundMe and stuff.
I think it's just kind of obvious
that today's couples, you know, the
way our economy has evolved, like
you can get anything you need for
your household at Walmart for 3 88.
it's just cheap.
know, you need, a wedding registry.
You don't need your friends and
family to shell out their hard
earned cash to get you more stuff.
Everybody has enough stuff now.
but what we really crave and
what I think wedding couples
really need after the stress of
planning a wedding isn't vacation.
some memories that they'll always
cherish and, 99.999% of any giver
who's ever come through Honey Fund
has said that was so much fun.
What a cool way to give a wedding gift.
I love that.
And isn't there a stat out there,
I might be making this up, but
there's some kind of stat about like
couples that do take a honeymoon and
take the time to take a honeymoon.
either like.
Are married longer or they have happier
marriages because they start off by
focusing on an experience together.
And I might be making that up, so
maybe I should look it up later, but I
remember hearing something about that.
Yeah.
Because there's a lot of couples that,
maybe they hold, off or they, aren't
able to because of other things, which
obviously there's some circumstances
where you just can't take a honeymoon.
I get it.
They're expensive.
You might not have Yeah.
Getting time off
work, family e emergencies.
There's all kinds of reasons couples
don't travel, but that stat is actually
from H Fund's own research and the
stat is that, couples who take a
honeymoon are more likely to be happily
married more than a decade later.
And, you know, when we first, did
that research and kind of interpreted
all that, it gave me goosebumps.
I was like, oh my gosh.
Like we've been doing something
really fun and cool for, 15 years.
But we didn't realize that it was actually
related to, marital satisfaction and.
As someone who's been through divorce with
Honeymoon's co-founder and having to like,
go through the hardest thing imaginable,
that really like sunk in for me.
And I was like, I wanna make happily
ever after the reason why we exist.
And so we really started thinking
about like, how do we not only get
couples on that first honeymoon,
but keep them traveling together
throughout their married lives so
that they can, benefit from the
relationship skill of travel, right?
So like mm-hmm.
When couples take time away from the
stress of everyday life, when they take
time to focus on each other, quality time,
time to dream, time to just breathe out.
They have better relationships,
stronger relationships.
And so, we just launched anniversary
fund last year so that, this year
actually, so that couples could
continue to travel together.
The couples who miss their honeymoons
could have that opportunity to
celebrate a master anniversary
with the help of friends and family
and make that honeymoon happen.
I love that.
that would be like my advice for people,
again, if it's feasible for people,
but like to plan when you're planning
your wedding, to plan that honeymoon.
Even just get it on the books,
even if it's not right away.
Yes.
Having that date, it's 'cause it's
something to one look forward to
after the wedding that doesn't
involve anybody but your partner.
And two, it's like, it's those memories
right away as a married couple.
And, I feel like it really, like
we were talking about, it's like
we have all this stuff, right?
We just keep accumulating stuff
year after year and that just
really brings home the idea of
experiences over more things, right?
Mm-hmm.
A hundred percent.
Yeah, you got it.
And so I just, I feel like it's so
important and the people I knew, I
knew different couples that year.
They were like, oh, we're gonna
wait till next year to do a
trip or we're gonna do this.
And then before you know it,
some of those couples never
ended up taking one because Yeah.
Whether they decided start having kids
or they move, or other things come up
and that things are gonna always come up.
Always.
So I think it's a way to like kind
of prioritize your relationship
and being like, okay, this week
we're setting aside our honeymoon
and that's what we're gonna do.
Yeah.
And also it's like this great
opportunity to like get time off
that like nobody can say no to.
Like no boss is gonna be like, no, I'm not
giving you time off for your honeymoon.
You know what I mean?
Like Yeah.
It's kind of a freebie, so you
gotta take it while you can.
Right.
but yeah, I really agree that,
Starting your marriage off, being able
to like decompress after the wedding
planning, which is really stressful.
I mean, the big day is awesome,
but sometimes you're just
kind of in shock, right?
And the next day you're like,
whoa, what just happened?
And you just need a minute to
collect yourself before you jump
right back into work and everything.
I think it's really important.
Yes.
Yeah, totally.
you hear of that, like, this didn't
happen to me, but I know a lot of brides
where they almost, depression's gonna be
a really strong word, but a lot of them
felt like, bumped after their wedding.
Yes.
Because they put so much stress and you
know, they spend weeks and months and Yes.
Planning, you're around family and
friends all the time doing this fun event
and then the day after they're like,
ah, I have nothing to look forward to.
And Okay.
Which is such a sad way to look at it.
And like, that's why I like always
tell people too, I'm like, it's
about starting the marriage.
Like yeah.
It's not all our focus on that one day.
Right.
But I think the honeymoon can really
help with it too, because that's
that thing to look forward to of
like starting your life, yeah.
Together and just no
responsibilities on the trip.
Just be Yeah,
I totally agree with you.
I think there's a lot of, bride
specifically who mourn the loss of
the wedding planning part of their
lives and the, joy and the comradery
and the community and everything
around wedding planning and many of
those actually become winning mentors.
Mm-hmm.
So that they can like, stick with it.
It was just something they
fell in love with and they
don't wanna to be gone anymore.
So.
Yeah.
I do think a lot of people find their
passion through wedding planning.
Like, they're like, oh, I love doing this.
Or they might find their hatred
about planning stuff, so they're
like, get me out of here.
So.
Before Honey Fund.
you worked in marketing for
a while, you said mm-hmm.
I think you also said customer service.
So how do you think those experiences
helped you prepare for this business
and ultimately launch this business?
Oh, that's a great question that nobody
has ever asked me before, Krista.
Oh, wow.
I thank you for that totally new question.
marketing was something that
I fell into after college.
I actually studied music as my
undergraduate degree with a minor
in German, so it was a very like,
just non-committal major, you
know, like I didn't know what
I wanted to be when I grew up.
I had a math and science background
in high school, but I didn't wanna be
like, you know, an engineer or like a
scientist and, when I got my first job in
marketing, I just fell in love with it.
I loved the intersection of
math and analytics with like,
customer psychology basically.
and so that came really naturally to me.
And so when we started Honeyfund,
I was able to bring, I went on to
get a master's degree in business
with an emphasis in marketing.
So I was able to bring all that
sort of passion and training to, and
my experience planning a wedding.
So my understanding of the
wedding industry too, to
bear in creating honey fund.
prior to that I had been in customer
service, and there's something about
customer service that I just love.
It's the idea that, you have an
opportunity to delight someone who's
frustrated with your brand to turn
them around, to make them an advocate
because you took such good care of
them to take full accountability
for any failure that they had.
that comes really, really easily to me.
and I just love the, like, the interaction
and the opportunity to serve people.
so I think all of that came
together to make Honey Fund.
it was just all about like, what would
I want, do I think would help other
couples, like have a great experience
and dealing with brides and money.
Those are two of the trickiest things
that a business can, deal with.
but we've been successful I think because
we have a really clear vision about
what it is we're trying to offer people.
A commitment to trying to be fee free
as much as possible, and a commitment to
just radically awesome customer service.
Yeah, I love that.
And so then you guys took your idea,
or you were already a business, but
then you guys went over to Shark Tank
and you were pretty successful there.
So what was that story like and how
did that kind of all come about?
Yeah, so we were just
plugging away in 2012.
I think we'd done about 200
million in gifting at that point.
this was six years after we launched.
We had just started hiring
people for the business.
We, had some customer service, folks
and we're starting to hire like
a designer and things like that.
but prior to that, we'd run it
all ourselves, just two of us.
and we got an email from Shark Tank.
And I'm not a fan of reality television.
I don't watch it for the most part.
so I really didn't know much about the
show, and my first gut instinct was like,
I don't wanna be on a reality TV show.
Like that just sounds like a nightmare.
but once we kind of dug into what
the show was a little bit more, we
were like, oh, this is interesting.
So they invited us to apply to the show.
They, somebody in casting knew
somebody on the crew who had given
a honey fun gift to a friend and was
like, that was so cool, you know?
Mm-hmm.
And talked about us to casting.
and they were looking for companies in
season six that were a little bit more
established, than like, your mom and pop,
you know, cupcake company or whatever.
Yeah.
So we applied and we got cast and we
walked into the tank in June of 20 14.
we did a deal with Kevin O'Leary.
We actually got three offers,
one from Robert, one from
Barbara, and one from Kevin.
And we took Kevin's offer and,
closed the deal ahead of the
airing date of October, 2014.
And, still partner with Kevin today.
he's been a great, asset and just a
fan of the brand and the customers.
The wedding sort of, he loves love.
You know, he actually officiated a
wedding for us on Zoom during COVID.
We did like a wedding rescue
giveaway where Mr. Wonderful
will like officiate your wedding.
Oh my gosh.
And people sharing their COVID
cancellation stories and, it was cool.
He's been a really fun partner.
Wow.
Oh, I love that.
That's awesome.
so what do you think your,
biggest challenge has been,
either like with starting up
the business or now to this day?
Like it.
Getting the business out there
or explaining it to new couples.
what do you think that kind of
challenge or hurdle has been?
Oh my gosh.
I mean, how much time do we have, Krista?
it's been a 20 year journey.
I would say the biggest challenge
in the beginning was figuring
out the monetization model.
Like we just wanted couples to be
able to get money for their honeymoon
and not have to pay any fees.
there's not a lot of like revenue
for a business and that model.
Right, right.
finding a way to continue to offer
either the lowest fees or no fees,
to couples while still being able
to, earn revenue and, employ a
team, was a very, very long journey.
And we actually just kind of
cracked the code on it this year,
with the honey fund MasterCard.
So you can now, receive the gifts.
You pay no transaction fees when
the gifts come into your wallet.
And then when you are ready to, cash
out your fund, you can move the money
to a prepaid MasterCard and spend it.
Anywhere around the globe that
MasterCard's accepted for no fees at all.
So that was a big deal,
that was like huge.
and then, couples can also cash out
to PayPal, Venmo for a small fee,
but it's the lowest in the industry.
And again, our commitment is just, we
want couples to get every cent that
they got from their wedding guests
and put it towards their honeymoon
or whatever their savings goal is.
I love that.
So that was a challenge.
the other one I would say,
biggest by far, well two that
came back to back first our split.
and when Josh exited the
business, that was really hard.
and, just emotionally difficult.
Transitioning the team, or
notifying really the team and
kind of helping them make the
transition to new tech leadership.
and then right after that, COVID hit and
our revenue dropped off a cliff overnight.
like weddings and honeymoons canceled.
but in the end, that was a catalyst
for growth for us because we went
out and did a crowdfunding raise.
and our past couples and wedding
guests who've given on the platform
our followers, Kevin's followers all
together, bought in for a $1.5 million
and, helped us grow the company from,
the wreckage of COVID to, what we're
doing today, which is 120,000 couples
a year and $80 million in gifting.
Wow, that's amazing.
I'm sure like COVID was such
a challenging time for so many
businesses, and I can only imagine
when it comes to like weddings.
Like we had a few different friends
that were supposed to get married that
year and venues just randomly closed
and they wouldn't hear any news and
vendors weren't really sure what was
going on, so I Oh, it was so awful.
Yeah, it was, I mean, that so stressful.
So many vendors and just wedding
related companies in general,
revenue just disappeared.
And some of them were on the
hook for, money that they spent
with venues or whatever else.
It was awful.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
before we get to, I'm gonna do rapid
fire next, but, what is your main
piece of advice for brides, grooms,
anyone getting married right now when
it comes to setting up a registry?
what is your biggest
tip, or piece of advice?
I would say like, don't be afraid to
do a cash registry or a honeymoon fund.
I know some couples are still a
little bit more traditional about it.
Or worry that their friends and
family won't, be open to the idea.
But like I said, everybody who's ever
used Honey fund, their friends and family
went crazy for it and like loved giving
the gifts and raped about the idea.
So, don't be afraid to do that.
On the flip side, I think there's
a generation of couples coming in
now that are, a little bit too,
like ready to ask for cash and just
slap in their Venmo QR code on their
invitation, and they're like, whoa,
okay, we gotta hold our horses here.
This is like from an etiquette
standpoint, like a little sticky.
and we, built Honey Fund to
really take all of those etiquette
considerations into account.
So, you know, your friends and family
really feel like they're shopping
from a registry and not just dumping
cash into your wallet, right?
So, we think Honey Fun strikes
the sweet spot between those two
and, friends and family, they
just wanna get you what you want.
You really said it at the
beginning of the episode.
Why wouldn't they wanna support
your dreams and get excited
about funding your trip?
so yeah, that would be my
biggest piece of advice.
Don't be afraid to ask for what
you want and you, it's not fun.
'cause we'll make it easy for you to
do it in an etiquette, approved way.
yeah.
For sure.
I totally agree with what you say because
I feel like still to this day, it should
not be an expectation that someone's gonna
just hand you cash or hand you money.
Absolutely.
People, of course, most people in
your, family and friends want to
give some kind of wedding gift.
Mm-hmm.
I've never personally, seen a
Venmo thing on an invite, but I
have heard of a lot of people and
like, stories people have sent me.
Mm-hmm.
And
I've seen a lot of stories about
high expectations of like, I'm the
bride, give me your money, give gifts.
Right.
And I feel like there's
definitely a right way to do it.
Mm-hmm.
Because like.
I remember when I got engaged, I was
like, I'm not, I don't expect anything.
But so many family friends were reaching
out, saying like, send me a registry.
Like before I even did it, they were
like, oh, I can't wait to, you know?
Mm-hmm.
What are you looking for?
And so people will want to, but yeah,
it's, there's a right time and a place
of like how, how to do it, for sure.
Yeah.
And I think the biggest horror
stories around gifting come from.
A sense that the couple isn't
grateful or they expect you to spend
a certain amount of money to cover
the cost of your plate or something.
And I say like, first of all,
never spend money that you aren't a
hundred percent comfortable spending.
Never plan a wedding that you feel like if
we don't get this certain number of gifts,
we're not gonna be able to cover this.
Like, that's not okay.
if you need money to plan your wedding,
you can do wedding funding on honey fund,
you could add some things to your registry
that are gonna help you, like flowers or,
you know, open bar or whatever the costs
are, and invite your closer in circle
to help fund those, because those are
the people that are gonna help you cover
the cost to your wedding anyway, right?
and then, when it comes to, like,
gifting, strict etiquette says that's
at the discretion of the giver, that
you should never expect anything.
And if you do, It's not gonna be
good for your relationship with
your closest friends and family.
People love you the most.
it's gonna put a sour taste in
their mouths and you don't wanna do
that to everyone you love at once.
don't look at people as
dollar signs at your wedding.
Look at them as people, if you'd
rather have someone there because
they're gonna give you a big check,
then you shouldn't be inviting them.
And I feel like people get
lost in that a lot of times.
Like they think about like, oh, I
want a big wedding 'cause of this.
And it's like, no.
Like you should be more excited
to have them there versus a gift.
Yeah.
for sure.
I actually just read, I feel like I
was either a Reddit story or someone
sent it to me about getting invited
to a wedding where it clearly stated
on the invitation it said, you are
required to pay for your plate.
And it gave the cost of the plate
and they, and it was like all
these really strict rules and
that was one where I was like, oh,
okay,
that's
okay.
So
much.
We're getting a little, a
little forward with that.
To me, that sounds like, one of
those mock weddings they do for
like wedding vendors or something.
It doesn't sound like
a real wedding to me.
I can't even imagine actually.
Yeah, putting that on there.
and there's so many ways to make
a wedding happen at any budget.
We have actually a lot of templates
for low cost, a thousand dollars,
$5,000 weddings on Honeyman's blog.
you can have a wedding in a park
on a Thursday afternoon with an
officiant and you know, your 20
closest friends and family and a cake.
And you know it's not about
all the pomp and circumstance.
It's not about the decorations
or the number of people or
the chicken or the fish.
It's about you and your person
really being authentic about
like, what can we afford to spend?
What kind of vibe do we want?
Who do we want to be there?
Ultimately, like you said,
it's about the marriage.
It's not about the one big day.
And if you're only doing it before
the day, then you know, you kind
of have to ask yourself like,
what am I gonna do when it's over?
Like, do I wanna be
married to this person?
You know, those are the tough questions.
Yeah.
When it comes to getting married.
Yeah, absolutely.
Sit together and go through
what's most important for you.
What do you wanna spend more money on?
Yeah.
cause I just did like a rapid
fire recently that was like,
what's more important for like me?
It was like the dress or
spend more on the honeymoon.
I was like, honeymoon all the way.
Oh yeah.
I didn't even get a super expensive dress.
I was like, I knew wear for one day.
Yeah.
I'd rather go go owl out on the honeymoon.
Yeah.
I actually sold my
dress after the wedding.
'cause I was like, I don't
have a place to store this.
You know?
It's not like it was some
dream dress that, I loved it.
It was beautiful and I've got all the
pictures, but like, let some other
bride enjoy it for a good price.
You know, that was kind of my, yeah.
Yeah.
It's like, I
love that.
Re reduce, reuse, recycle kind
of California vibes over here.
Yes.
I love that.
I should honestly do that with
some of my bridesmaid dresses.
I have so many bridesmaid
outfits.
There you go.
Oh my gosh.
Right.
I've used them for Halloween costumes.
That's a great idea.
You know what the funny thing is
I've given away, so I've been in 10
weddings and I've given away two, and
I was literally looking for one this
year and it's one I got rid of and
I was like, darn it for Halloween,
because I was gonna, Belinda.
Oh.
I was like, oh, I had a pink dress.
And I was like, that would've perfect.
I don't know where it is.
I think I got rid of it.
Oh man.
I wanna offer one more piece of advice.
This came up recently.
Mm-hmm.
in the news.
People like wonder, like
why do I need a honey fund?
Can't I just have like a honeymoon
contribution box like on the day of
my event and just have people bring
cash or checks or whatever, which is
like, a totally legitimate question,
but it's not very secure and there are
plenty of stories of couples having all
their cash gifts stolen at the wedding.
so, making it available to your
friends and family ahead of time.
First of all, make sure that
everybody's got access to the
gift, whether they can come or not.
Second of all, it's secure.
you're gonna get the money for
free anyway, so it's not like you
have to try to skirt the system.
and you can put a QR code on your, gift
table for people who hadn't gotten it,
in ahead of time to, send you a little
bit something through your honey fund.
I love that for someone like
me, I love when couples have one
because I don't carry checks.
Yeah.
So I, yeah, I'm such a, I don't know if
I'm, I think I'm like a middle millennial.
Maybe I'm younger,
millennial, I don't know.
But I don't carry checks.
So when there's a wedding coming up, it's
like I have to make an extra trip to the
bank, or I get a bunch of cash out and
I'm like, oh my gosh, like you are gonna
have a couple hundred bucks in a card.
That's like very risky to me.
So I love when they offer a honey fund
because it's so much easier for me to
be like, just do it right from my phone.
Like, that's so much easier.
I get a card still, I put it on the table
and I write like little note, like, check
your honey fund, or you know, or whatever.
Sometimes I do that.
Love it.
but it's so much easier.
Yeah.
Sounds good.
And we had that too, like
even like a couple people that
couldn't make it to our wedding.
the day of like they were sick or their
kids were sick and they just like sent
something and then we just got like
an email and it was like, so sorry.
And then they sent their gift that way.
So it was like, even if you couldn't
be there, it's just like an easier way.
We all have access on our phones.
lot of us don't have checks anymore.
Mm-hmm.
Or carry around cash.
A lot of us don't carry around cash.
so many people now just
don't ever carry cash.
And like, I usually have a
little cash, but like, not
enough when I usually want it.
I don't have it, so.
Yep.
It's so funny.
You just have everything
with your phone now.
Yes.
Oh yeah.
The ease.
So, or like at
Whole Foods you can use your palm to pay.
I'm not into that yet, but, oh, that's
a, we'll have to look into that as a
feature for honey fund, like gift table.
Like just be with your palm, just put
hand.
Technology is wild.
It scares me sometimes, but
it's a hundred percent Cool.
Yeah.
Okay.
We are gonna go into rapid fire.
It's honeymoon, and kind of
like CEO edition, so there's
kinda like mixed in there.
Okay.
Let's do it.
Okay.
What's a realistic honeymoon
budget for most couples?
Ooh, I love this.
so I'll give you some averages and
then I'll give you some ranges.
So, average honeymoon
budget right now is $6,500.
This is a survey of H Fund couples, that
has gone up considerably since pre COVID.
Wow.
2,700 I, or 3000 I think was the sort
of typical amount to spend prior to
COVID, and a much larger wedding budget.
That's almost flipped now where
you have, $6,500 honeymoons and
like maybe 12, $15,000 weddings.
So people are just allocating a
much bigger portion of available
funds to their honeymoon.
And I think you nailed it when
you said like, yeah, we know what
we're doing for our honeymoon.
You know, a lot of couples I asked
today that are newly engaged,
Where are you gonna get married?
What month?
Blah, blah.
They don't know any of that.
Where are you going on your honeymoon?
We're going to Thailand.
Mm-hmm.
Like, they already know.
You know what I mean?
So it's interesting.
Yes.
I love that.
I've noticed that too.
I feel like it's definitely changed a
little bit and I think people are getting
more creative with where they're going.
I feel like it used to be like, my
parents' generation, it was like Hawaii.
I think everyone went to Hawaii.
Oh yes, yes.
And we even looked at Hawaii
and it was so expensive.
So we ended up doing like
all-inclusive resort.
But yeah, I just feel like there's a
lot more emphasis on realizing like.
Planning this trip is
like really important.
Mm-hmm.
Even if you can only do
a couple days mm-hmm.
Somewhere.
Mm-hmm.
Just to like plan
something a little getaway.
I love that.
Yep.
Should you save for the honeymoon
before or after the wedding?
Should
you save for it before or after?
it really depends on, when
you wanna take the honeymoon.
I'm a big fan of long engagements
that allow you to start setting money
aside from each of your paychecks
every month to kind of build a seed
fund for your wedding and honeymoon.
and then of course your H fund,
you know, contributions are
gonna help you cover it too.
So if you're planning to go right after
your wedding, I think you wanna have a
financial plan around your honeymoon,
like six months ahead of the wedding.
So what we're doing now is we're offering,
couples a 0% interest credit card offer so
that they can get that booked but not have
to pay it back until after, the wedding,
when their honey fund gifts come in.
Oh, great.
So, yeah, I think you need a
financial plan and if you can save,
one to two years ahead of your
wedding and honeymoon, absolutely.
Start doing that.
Mm-hmm.
if you know you're not gonna
be able to honeymoon until
six months or a year after.
continue to save until that time comes.
Yeah.
And put it on your calendar
just so you Yes, absolutely.
Put something or let it slide off.
You gotta
book it.
You gotta ask for the time off.
You gotta make sure everyone
in your life knows, like,
these are our honeymoon dates.
Don't plan somebody else's wedding
during this time, or whatever.
Right?
Yes.
what's the biggest honeymoon money
mistake you think couples make?
Ooh, I think it can be really easy to,
with all of the hustle and bustle of
planning a wedding for the honeymoon,
planning to fall through the cracks,
and then you maybe are scrambling to
plan it a little too late and you're
not getting access to the best prices.
So kind of making sure that you have a
honeymoon planning sort of timeline that's
happening alongside your wedding planning.
deciding early where you wanna go, finding
out the best time of year to travel there.
when flights are gonna be most
reasonable, when hotel rooms
are gonna be most reasonable.
And, planning well ahead I think
is the best way to save money in
most cases in life in general.
Yes.
But certainly with travel planning.
Yeah, I love that.
Yeah.
It's funny 'cause like one of the
weddings I was in, my friend is
such a planner that like, I think
we all booked for Her bachelorette
party was in Miami, not Miami.
Sarasota, siesta Key.
I love Sarasota.
I think we all had our flights booked.
Like she had exactly where she, like,
she planned it herself as the bride.
She's like, I found these
two houses we're gonna rent.
I found these flights.
They're like this cheap.
And like, because it was so in advance,
it was such a good price for everything.
She knew the right season to go.
She knew the right time.
Like I think we went like four
months before her actual wedding,
just 'cause the timing was right.
Wow.
so you can actually do pretty
well, especially with flights
and stuff like saving money.
Buying on travel Tuesday versus like Yes.
Last minute flights.
Yes.
yeah.
So smart and
there's so much tech now that
can tell you, it can alert
you when flight prices drop.
It can help you with like different types
of connections that can save you money.
Like, I would say definitely if
you like travel planning, like
start on it as soon as possible.
Yeah.
I love that.
I didn't ask this one before,
but we kind of talked about it,
about like having your honeymoon
as a part of your wedding budget.
Do you think those should be two separate
budgets or just like one big and then
figure out how much you wanna allocate?
Yeah, well, I mean, realistically
speaking, it's all one budget, which is
your combined financial picture, right?
And so you have to ask yourself,
when we wake up the morning after
our wedding night, how much money
do we wanna have in the bank for?
The next step in life, whether that's
buying a home or paying off debt or going
and doing a master's program or something.
your financial life never, ends, right?
You have to be constantly planning ahead.
we actually have a worksheet, it's called
the one page wedding plan, where you just
sit down and like think about, okay, how
much money do we have in the bank now?
How much time do we have to save?
How much do we expect friends and
family to be able to contribute and
then helps you allocate that financial
picture across all the different things.
And like I said, you know, what we're
finding is couples are allocating
so much more of their overall
budget picture to the honeymoon
these days than they used to.
Mm-hmm.
And a lot less on the wedding
because they just, number one,
it's like impossible to afford.
we just did a bunch of research on
destination weddings and we learned
that couples are holding destination
weddings within the US just to go
to a more affordable wedding market.
Wow, that's,
isn't that interesting?
Yeah.
And kind of then just turning that
trip into their honeymoon Probably.
Yeah.
Not nec.
No, they're not even, they're still
taking a separate honeymoon, but
they're having a destination wedding
just because wherever they live is
just too expensive to plan a wedding.
Yeah.
Isn't that fascinating?
And it's wild how it
changes from state to state.
Yes, definitely.
I'm in Wisconsin and I think they're,
I mean, we went pretty affordable
for ours, so I think, I shouldn't
say, or affordable, it was still
on the, it was still up there, but,
I hear like California or New York
price, like downtown New York prices.
I'm like, woo.
New York though.
the New York wedding industry is
almost a completely different beast
all its own and it influences so much
of the rest of the industry, I think
really unfairly, because the big
sites like the Knot and WeddingWire,
you know, are out of New York and.
It's just not real.
it's just New York.
like I said, you can do a wedding in a
public park with no venue cost, you know,
with your friend ordained online, no
efficient cost at a cake that you buy at
Whole Foods or whatever your local grocery
store like what you need is your love.
That's it.
and you can build from there.
If you kind of start with this
like, okay, what's like the minimum?
We need to do this?
And then just build from there.
Okay, this is important to us.
That's important to us.
Yeah.
We can afford that.
Yeah.
We're willing to spend our money on that.
you'll come up with something that I
think is truly authentic and fun and
unique for your friends and family and
like so supportive of your financial
picture and your future together.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
I've been to some beautiful
weddings that were like DIY.
Under a tent and it looked great.
And it's just about having that
eye and it's intimate, it's small.
Yeah.
And then I've been to huge weddings
that they spent a lot of money
and they were beautiful, but that
was what was important to them.
Right.
And it looked great and
they had the funds for it.
Right.
And I think a lot of it is like comparison
and people follow these, like, influencers
in New York and they're like, oh my
gosh, that's how much I have to spend.
Oh my gosh, I'm gonna go broke.
And it's like, no.
Yeah, you don't have to do that.
Yeah.
Actually, I'm gonna tell you a
quick little side story right now
because, I've been working with a
reporter that, writes for the New
York Times for a couple years on a
story about the real cost of weddings.
And I don't mean like the super
expensive New York weddings, I
mean everyday weddings that couples
are having that are so cool and
unique and financially accessible.
And the fact that like 30,000 might
still be the average, but it's not
actually the most common budget anymore.
that's skewed by like
very, very expensive.
Like the New York weddings
we're talking about.
and just, kind of like resetting
expectations about what it actually
cost you to plan a wedding.
The story that came out was
like, completely not that.
It was just like, this is why
weddings are so expensive and this
is where you're gonna have to spend.
And I was just like pulling my hair.
I'm like, no, it's just an unrealistic,
like expectation and it's a
false sort of like, I don't know.
I think it's misleading.
I really encourage couples not to buy
into it because it's just like any
other industry or business, you know?
Mm-hmm.
They're gonna try to get you to
feel like if I don't do that,
I'm gonna regret it forever.
That sort of emotional, sort of
FOMO based marketing in the wedding
industry really gets my blood boiling.
Yes.
No, for sure.
I work in marketing too, and I feel
like I can seek stuff like that out.
it's funny 'cause even like, some sales
stuff, I feel like my husband's so quick
to be like, oh, that's a great deal.
And I'll be like, weren't they just that?
You know, like I can, kind of
scope some of that stuff up.
Yeah, it kind of goes to like, back, and I
don't even know if they say this anymore,
but like, back to like engagement rings,
they'd be like, oh, he should spend six
months of his salary on an engagement
ring, or her dress should cost this much.
And it's just like, why are we setting
these expectations for other people?
Yeah.
Not knowing their job, their
budget, their interests.
yeah,
for me, like I just said, like my
dress was, I wanted a beautiful dress.
Yes.
But I did not wanna spend
$10,000 or $5,000 on a dress.
That just wasn't me.
I know.
And I'm so glad you mentioned
diamonds because, They have these
beautiful lab grown diamonds now
literally can't tell the difference.
Nobody would know.
Even like a moist aite is like gorgeous.
like I have a five carat moist aite
that I wear a lot, and I have to be
careful when I wear it because people
are like, damn, she's got money.
You know, if I had it to do over again,
I would, be smart about where to put
that money because we did some math
on like the typical or the, quote,
average wedding price of $35,000.
if you invested that on day one of
your marriage, you would have 1.2
million for retirement so, like that's
what you're not getting by spending
that much money on your wedding day.
When you think about it that
way, it's like a totally
different perspective, you know?
Yeah.
It makes you make different choices.
Yeah.
It's wild.
You got, it's like you gotta take
the pressure off of like take off the
blinders of what everyone's trying
to tell you to do and just yeah.
Look at what's in front of you.
Talk to your partner.
Yeah.
What do we wanna do?
Yeah.
Like, you know, everybody else.
It's definitely easy to fall into the
trap of like, well, they got married
in this palace and it was so beautiful.
And it's like, is that feasible?
Yeah.
Like, you
wanna get married there,
or,
yeah.
Right.
I mean, yes, of course we all want
to stay in the most luxurious, you
know, villa on our trips or whatever,
but like, you can have an incredible
experience and make it affordable.
And that's why, you know, on Honeyfund,
you're not gonna find that kind of
like FOMO based, marketing messaging.
You're not gonna find this whole
world of like these real weddings that
are just way out of your price point
and make you feel like less than.
We just help you share the details
of your, day, get some money
to help fund your, wedding or
honeymoon or whatever savings goal.
we have RSVP and guest management.
We try to just be like a simple
alternative to those like
mm-hmm.
Overblown wedding planning sites.
Yeah, I love that.
All right.
I got a little sidetracked
from the rapid fire, but so did
I. That wasn't rapid at all.
Yeah,
I know.
I love it.
Okay, I'll do a couple more and then we'll
get into this week's story submission.
let's see.
Do you think couples should delay
the honeymoon to save money or
take it right away and then we
kinda just talked about this, but
delay it Only if it's gonna make
it like a much better trip for
you and it's gonna cost you less,
but otherwise take it right away.
Yeah.
What's your thought on
like surprise honeymoons?
Because I've seen a couple times where
there's surprise honeymoons, whether
it's like the groom plans it or someone
a family member plans it for the couple.
What are your thoughts on that?
If it's a travel planner doing it and
they've interviewed you ex extensively
about what kind of trip you want?
Yes.
Or if you both just love to be surprised.
Yes.
Otherwise hell no.
Yeah.
That was my thought when I first
read about a story like that,
I was like, I would hate that.
Yeah.
No, let, let me plan more on that.
Unless you're both like that
personality or like I said, somebody
whose job it is to plan awesome
trips and, make sure you love it,
but not like an in-law or a friend.
No way.
Jose,
right?
Yes.
You've been on one of their great
trips and you're like, okay, I know
what they know what they're doing.
Yes.
I'll do that.
Okay.
I love that.
Okay.
Let's get to this week's
wedding story submission.
Here we go.
Feel free to stop me at any time or
we'll kind of just pause and react.
Okay.
Going into my wedding day, I
was honestly bracing for chaos.
Knowing my mother-in-law, I was
sure something would go down.
I'd experienced her episodes before
and let's just say I have some stories.
Seriously, let me know if you want more.
She has a long history of taking her
anger towards her ex-husbands out on
my husband and I truly thought she
might ruin our day, especially because
she was going to be there alongside
her first husband and his wife and
her second husband and his wife.
A full soap opera cast y'all.
But somehow against all odds,
the wedding itself was perfect.
Not a single issue.
Everyone behaved.
It was peaceful, joyful,
and completely drama free.
That's amazing.
I was like, you glad your job free
to.
Thanks
so much.
Story over
Krista.
It was great talking to you.
That was it.
Alright.
Yeah, yeah.
How disappointing would that be if
people are like, okay, I'm ready.
And I'm like, drama free guys.
There was nothing for the first time ever.
Yeah.
she goes until the next morning.
So at least the mom held it off
the wedding day, which is on the
wedding day, which I would say it's
pretty polite to like, you know?
Mm-hmm.
Bare minimum, but yeah.
Okay.
For some, like her, she had
gifted us a hotel room at
Embassy Suites for wedding night.
Very thoughtful.
What we didn't know, she also booked
herself a room at the same hotel.
So the morning after, my husband
and I head down for what we
think will be our first quiet
breakfast together as newlyweds.
We walk in and there she is frantically
waving from across the breakfast lounge.
We were stunned, but okay.
We go over and say hi.
She invites us to eat with her.
we didn't really want to, but
out of politeness, we sit down.
See, for me, I'm like, we all,
actually, I think my husband and I
stayed at like a bed and breakfast in
the same tone, but we ended up going
to the hotel to like go see everybody.
Yeah.
You
wanted to see these people.
Yeah.
It doesn't sound like this bride wanted
to see her mother-in-law the next morning.
Right.
It sounds to me like.
She almost made it sound like the
mother-in-law when she booked it, made
it sound like, oh, I got you guys a
nice room over at the Embassy Suites.
Mm-hmm.
So they're like, oh, awesome.
This is really nice.
Right.
We walk down, surprise.
Yeah.
Small talk starts and then she drops it.
So how was your first night?
We awkwardly respond fine.
What else do you say to your mom-in-law?
And then the real drama begins?
She says, I need a ride to the airport.
Mind you, there were over 20
family members staying nearby,
all flying out that day.
Any one of them could have taken her,
but she insists that we, the just married
couple must do it even though it would
add two hours to our already nine hour
drive to our honeymoon in Orlando.
We respectfully decline and offer to
pay a hundred dollars for a cab instead.
That's when she completely loses it.
Right there in the lobby, in front
of staff, in front of other guests.
She calls us selfish saying We're
ungrateful for the $300 room she paid for.
Then she tells us she's keeping
our car keys to my husband's BMW,
which she had driven the night
before until we change our minds.
So this is like a full on
like tantrum now to like go
I just, I can't even imagine like ruining
someone's morning after like that.
what in the world.
It's like she
had this planned all along to be like,
oh, I'm gonna make this hotel room for
them, so that's gonna be my nice deed.
Right.
But I'll be there.
Yeah.
they have no other choice but to drive me.
Ugh.
God, I'm kind of speechless, to be honest.
Krisa like, first of all, nobody
has any business expecting anything
from a wedding couple in the
first couple weeks of marriage.
Like they're in their honeymoon phase,
like, second of all, like I don't
imagine the mother-in-law is thinking
ahead of like, okay, well this is my
daughter-in-law now forever, hopefully.
and I'm gonna start my relationship
with her as her official
mother-in-law by being a total bee.
Like, I just don't,
yeah.
That's what always confuses me
about these kind of stories.
I'm like, don't they want to
see their son or child more?
And I feel like they don't
realize or think through that.
Like, if they act this way, they're
gonna see them less and less because
no one's gonna wanna be around them.
Yeah.
I think it's honestly as the
mother of, both a son and a
daughter, and having a brother too.
It's different for the
mother of the groom.
because in families, you know, women often
kind of take the lead on social stuff and
they tend to just be more comfortable with
and gravitate towards their own family.
So you're gonna find your, precious
baby boy spending less time with
you and more time with her family.
Right.
And that's just kind of the way life is.
so I think if you wanna mitigate
that, you gotta be pretty nice.
Yes.
Yeah.
if you just wanna throw a
tantrum about that Sure.
Throw your tantrum, but it's not
gonna help you make it better.
Yeah, no, exactly.
she screams it's your duty as my only
son to protect me and get me to the
airport and storms off with our keys.
Also knowing that they have to drive to
their honeymoon already nine hours away.
I know.
I'm like, I wanna buy them
a plane ticket right now.
I know, I know.
And it's not like this is
like an airport down the road.
She's, they said another two hours to the
airport, or at least one there, one back.
and, but I'm like psychologically
breaking down this woman, like
the line like, you're my only son.
You have to protect me, is exactly
what the mother of a son would be
afraid of, that now all of a sudden,
all the attention she got from her
son is now gonna go to this new
wife and she's gonna be left alone.
I, I mean look, all the villains
have a backstory, right?
Like mm-hmm.
Does not excuse the behavior, but
you can kind of see how that somebody
with not great skills, and anger
management problems would be like
acting this way if they're afraid
of losing their kid, you know?
Yes.
I love that you said that because one
of my most popular like storylines that
I'm doing the Ferris and Sloan one, I'm
doing the prequel right now of like.
The whole thing starts with she wants to
invite herself on like her son and his
girlfriend at the Time's, like vacation.
Yeah.
She's like, I wanna come.
It's like he's gonna
propose she wants to go.
And it's this whole storyline.
And so I'm doing the prequel now.
Like I did three seasons of it.
People like ate it up.
They love the story.
Oh, that's so cool.
And it's so, yeah.
It's been so much fun.
And so I'm in the prequel now, kind
of showing like how she was raised.
Oh.
And like kind of showing all that.
And that's the thing we keep
saying is it doesn't excuse the
behavior, it's just explaining it.
Yeah.
Where this, I feel like the
first season of White Lotus had a
mother-in-law like this where she
showed up on their honeymoon, right?
In Hawaii.
Wait, yeah.
I'm trying to think.
I love White Lotus.
I'm trying to think of It's the best.
It's, yeah, the first season was in
Hawaii and there was, that couple
where the, husband was kind of a jerk
and his mom shows up on the honeymoon.
And the mom was played by
somebody from SNLI wanna say.
like who was the cast?
That was the one with, Aubrey.
What's her name?
I'm so bad at remembering actors' names.
Um, Aubrey Plaza.
Yeah, she was, or was she in the second
season in, Italy, I think, right?
Oh yeah,
that's right.
Yeah.
Was
it Italy?
Wait, hold on.
Yeah.
Italy was season two.
Thailand was season three.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Yes.
the one with Molly Shannon.
Molly Shannon played the mother-in-law.
Exactly.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah.
I need to go back and watch it,
but showed up on the honeymoon.
Yeah, you gotta go back and watch it.
Oh, that's wild.
I kind of forgot about that storyline,
that one was probably the best season.
It was so good.
They're all so good.
Yeah.
I have to go back and watch that.
It is like a very popular trope of Yes.
That she can't distance herself.
yeah.
She can't let go of her son.
Mm-hmm.
And especially like this one, it shows
like both of her ex-husbands are there
with their new wife, so I'm sure that
adds to the like, I need you son.
Like, you're my man.
You're my guy.
Yes.
Which
is also just so creepy and weird.
Yeah.
It's that enmeshment of yes.
You can't see herself as
a separate person from.
Exactly.
she said the hotel.
Okay.
We're not even done with
the story yet.
Okay.
Keep going.
No, there's a little bit more.
Okay.
She said the hotel staff was
just standing there wide-eyed.
We go to the front desk.
The woman working had seen
everything and was incredibly kind.
We asked her to call my mother-in-law's
room since she was ignoring our
calls, so she literally ran away
with their keys to her room.
Wow.
She does.
And when my husband gets on the phone, my
mother-in-law is yelling so loudly that
people can hear her without speakerphone.
She refuses to return the keys.
At this point, we're wasting
our honeymoon morning.
So we text her, leave the
keys at the front desk.
They know it's our car.
If not, we'll file a police report.
We pack up and decide
to take my car instead.
At least they both have a car there.
As we head toward the lot, I suddenly hear
my husband say, Kat, get in the car now.
I run to the car.
And just in time to see her
sprinting towards him, and she
throws the keys at his face.
this is wild.
I'm like picturing this in like a parking
lot.
Wow.
the words that I wanna use right now are
not suitable for podcasts, but Oh wow.
Oh my gosh.
that is insane.
It's because she didn't
get what she wanted.
She thought by them
saying like she thought.
By her withholding the keys.
They'd be like, okay, you know what, we'll
take you.
They'd have to do what she wanted
and good for them, honestly, as
a team for setting a boundary.
Because issues with in-laws come up
all the time, all day, every day.
Right.
And like when it comes to a marriage,
a marriage is different than just
being boyfriend girlfriend or dating
someone because you really, really
have to have each other's back first
before anyone else in your life.
That's what makes marriage work.
And, avoid talking about tough stuff
that you're going through with them, with
your family, even a lot of your friends,
because it's gonna set up this sort of
like, me versus him, kind of a dynamic.
Yeah.
When you're really, I
love what this couple did.
They stuck together.
they called the bluff.
They were like, look, we're not gonna
let your tantrum throw off our day.
leave our keys or, you know,
we'll act accordingly and.
It worked like good for them.
That was like honestly some of the best
like training for marriage right there.
and they passed the test.
They leaped over that hurdle.
Literally they did it, they really
did handle it very well of just
being like, you know what, like
almost treating it like, a toddler.
Okay.
Yeah.
If you're gonna act that way, we're gonna
just figure out, we're gonna keep going
this way because you're just not Sorry.
You know what
I wanna do?
I don't know if you can do this, but
like I would really love to send them a
little gift and like congratulate them on
getting through that in a graceful way.
I'll have to see.
Yeah.
When they like sent it.
I do have their, this person's
information, so I'll have to
see like when they sent it.
But we have these really
sweet Honey Ben Stanley's
that we could send them.
Oh, cute.
Oh, I love that.
That's so cute.
She then storms off again.
I check on him.
We get in the car and
finally we drive off.
Still married, still heading to our
honeymoon, but absolutely stunned.
And sadly, this wasn't the last
of it over the past 10 years.
Okay.
So this was 10 years ago.
Wow.
Oh my God.
Noticed.
This was 10 years ago.
We've dealt with stunt after stunt,
emotional manipulation, dramatic
scenes, chaos at every family gathering.
But this was the first
of many wild moments.
She's thrown our way.
And finally, this year, for the sake of
our children, we've made the decision
to significantly limit contact.
Wow.
So it took 10 years of manipulation
and dramatic scenes, all that stuff to
finally be like, okay, you're limited.
I don't even know if I'd want someone
like that around my children knowing
they're gonna throw something or
It's hard.
Yeah.
It's hard
having
problematic grandparents.
The kids figure it out though, you
know, they make their own decisions.
Like, eh, we don't like
hanging out with that person.
Yeah.
I feel like kids are so in tune to people.
Mm-hmm.
That they're just like, they
go with their gut for sure.
They're not like adults where we
can kind of like smile and be okay.
They're like, no, I don't want.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
so she just ends with saying, because
peace is better than chaos and eventually
boundaries have to be drawn, even
if it takes a decade to get there.
And then she said, PS I
love all your stories.
I relate to Sloan.
So the story I was telling you
about has Ferris and Sloan.
So she says, I relate to Sloane, which is.
Funny.
That's awesome.
Wow.
Well, that's a wild story.
the twist of the 10
years later at the end.
I was not expecting that.
That was great.
Yeah.
And I'm sure that image, is still
in her head so fresh because it
was such a high intense moment.
and I love how he protected
her too in those moments.
He was like, with her on the boundary,
he was like, I'm protecting you.
Yeah.
but I still have a lot of questions
like how you would keep, I mean,
I'm sure it's very nuanced and very
complicated, but it's like after that,
like what was the next step after that?
You know, they go on their honeymoon,
it's just like, is the mom still not
understanding she did anything wrong?
And yeah.
How you keep that going for 10 years?
It's so hard to like deal with
children in grownup bodies.
Yeah.
But I think having kids probably
gave them a new perspective on like
her behavior and like, oh, we're
just actually dealing with a child
here, and you gotta have boundaries.
Yep.
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Well, all right, well,
thank you for sharing that story.
That was fun.
Yeah.
That was, I mean, not for
them, but, you know.
Yeah.
It's always like a
twisted and seen coming.
yeah.
But yeah, I know we get so many
stories and I'm always just
like, they shock me every time.
It's wild.
Wow.
I feel like a lot of people tell me
too, they're like, it actually helped.
They'll say this like, helped
me to write it all out.
They're like, I never
told anyone it this way.
Hmm.
it really helped me get through
my feelings or understand like,
whoa, this was really toxic.
Because when you're in the moment,
sometimes you don't see it that way.
Oh, for sure.
lose perspective.
Yeah.
okay.
So I always like to end these
with a couple of confessions that
people send me on social media.
So let's read
Ooh Confessions.
I love it.
All right.
It says, at my sister's wedding, one of
her bridesmaids didn't get her a gift,
and I thought that was kind of weird.
What are your thoughts on that?
Like, if you're in
someone's wedding mm-hmm.
Should you automatically get them a gift?
there's more to consider in this
situation than just a typical wedding
guest, because that bridesmaid's already
gone to some, probably considerable
expense to bring the gift of her
presence to the wedding, right?
however, and I've been in that
situation at a time in my life, in
my twenties when I didn't really
have a lot of money to get a gift.
But what I would do is I would
like, make something, or buy
something similar to what they
registered for that I could afford.
I think just the token gift, something
meaningful and like, personal mm-hmm.
Shows that you are celebrating
their, day, with a gift.
But again, gift is always at
the discretion of the giver.
And if that bridesmaid really felt like
she poured her heart and her budget
into that person's wedding, and that
was the gift, I don't really think it's
something that you can hold against her.
Yeah.
I agree.
I feel like that was so well said.
And I feel like there's been
weddings that, like were very DIY
that I was a part of, and I done
did so much, and I had the brides
be like, please don't get me a gift.
Yeah.
And even when I gave it to
them, they ripped up the check.
Like I, one in particular, she was like,
no, I'm literally not accepting this.
Aw.
And then I had other ones
that were like, same thing.
They were like, please don't feel like
you have to like, get me a gift that you
would as a guest because you've mm-hmm.
Been a part of the bachelorette party.
You bought a dress.
do think it's kind of
like, murky area there.
Mm-hmm.
If you wanna give a gift, do it.
Mm-hmm.
But I guess it doesn't feel like.
I know you do put in a lot being
in a wedding party as well.
Yeah.
And
I mean, you know, you can write the
bride and ice card and say, look, being
in your wedding has been such an honor.
unfortunately I'm out of budget for
like, something from your registry,
but I would love to give you this
handmade friendship bracelet to honor,
how much you mean to me or something.
Yeah.
You know, just anything personal.
Yeah, definitely.
Yeah,
because like, again, after my wedding,
I wasn't like checking the box of
like, oh, this bridesmaid or this
groomsman didn't get us a gift.
Like, I was so happy to be
surrounded by our family and friends.
So that was not a concern to me.
They they got the dress.
I'm like, you guys are awesome.
okay, lemme just read a couple more.
my uncle invited random
strangers to my cocktail hour.
Was that cute?
I'm like, he's like, oh, I'm single.
I'm gonna
invite some people here.
I'm gonna bring some rows.
Oh my.
Was that it?
yeah, go ahead.
yeah.
No, it's just, that was it.
Okay.
oh, okay.
My uncle our cocktail hour.
So that's like after the ceremony.
Before the, yeah.
Huh.
did they stay for the reception or
are they just like hanging out just
so you free drinks, you're not allowed
to invite your own people
to someone's wedding.
That's just a no-no.
Um, yeah, please don't
do that.
If you wanna bring a date and
the date wasn't explicitly like
a plus one on the invitation.
I've been in situations where I
checked in with a couple about that.
Like, Hey, I'm not sure
the way this was written.
Is this a plus one or not?
but you don't get to make your own.
Invitations to someone's wedding.
It's just not the way it works.
Yeah.
One of our guests quit their
job to attend our wedding.
Whoa.
That's a friend.
I mean, hopefully, or maybe it was
like they were just done with this job.
Yeah.
And they were like, you can't
take off for the wedding.
And they were kinda like, screw you.
That, that's kind of what I'm
thinking must have happened, because
I've heard of that, where they're
just like, this is my moment.
Like, I'm not missing my best
friend's wedding or something.
Yeah.
But like, obviously it sucks when you
can't be in two places at once and there
are weddings that I did not go to that I
still regret to this day not being there.
But there was nothing I could do.
I was pregnant and I couldn't fly or
don't do something like that unless you
already wanted to quit and you got a plan
to like go get another job or whatever.
And then you wanna take a few
days off to like rage with your
friends while they get married.
Cool.
all for it.
Yeah.
Honestly, that sounds like something
I would've done like maybe in my
early twenties if I was just like
already over a toxic job or something.
Something a hundred percent.
Yes.
Like, get me out of here.
You know what, that was my sign.
Yeah.
and then you could, it's
kind of a fun story.
Like, oh yeah.
You know, I quit my job for these guys.
you tell it for the rest of your life.
Whatever.
Yeah.
True friend right here.
Yeah.
Oh my gosh.
Well thank you so much for coming on.
It was so great meeting you after knowing
so much about your brand and your company.
I just think it's great.
I've talked about Honey
Fund and Honeymoons.
so many times on the podcast of just, I
think it's such a fun concept and how like
we're just kind of changing the concept
over time of like gift giving as well.
Thank you Krista.
Thank you for being a fan and supporting
the cause and yeah, this was so much fun,
such a different kind of podcast than
I've ever been on before and I loved it.
Thank you so much for having me.
Oh
good.
And for everyone listening,
where can they follow you?
Follow Honey Fund and see
what's coming up next?
Yeah, well, honey honeyfund.com
you can download the app in the app
stores, follow us on Instagram, TikTok.
I would say we're most
active on those platforms.
And then if you're interested in,
entrepreneurship or other things like
that, you could find me on LinkedIn.
I write a lot of, content around,
running a business and, you know,
travel and relationships and
I'd love to connect with you.
Awesome.
Well thank you so much.
Thanks Krista.
Have a great day.
You too.