Hi Jubilee.

Thank you so much for coming on.

Oh, thank you so much for having me.

I'm so excited to have you on.

I follow your content pretty regularly,

and someone had sent me your wild.

Maid of honor story.

But before we get to that, I want

you just to introduce yourself,

talk about what you share on social

media, all that good stuff, and then

we'll get into, your wild story.

Yeah.

I am Jubilee Dawn.

I share on TikTok and Instagram, and

I have two podcasts and I share a lot

about religious deconstruction, so

I talk a lot about purity culture.

Crazy youth pastor stories.

And then also I've done many story times

about the maid of honor situations.

Okay.

I love it.

Yeah.

All healing stuff.

okay, so what are your two

podcasts and how do you find

the time to do two podcasts?

I'm like, with one, I'm

just like, oh my God.

It's, a lot of times

I honestly don't even

know how I'm doing it.

I just went part-time, thank goodness.

cause I still have a job.

Job Okay.

On top of doing content.

But, my podcast that I do like, my main

podcast, I would say is Heel Dish, and

that's where I do any survivor stories.

And yeah, I have an editor,

so that helps for that one.

And then my other podcast

is the Overshare Hour.

And on that one we do advice.

So it's an advice column podcast,

and it's with my best friend.

We both joined religious cults at

the age of 17 and 18 and she actually

married my brother and they are

have since divorced, but her and

I are still best friends, so Wow.

Yeah, she's also a content creator, so

we have a lot of fun on that one as well.

And then we like switch off editing

those, but yes, I feel very busy.

I love that.

So were you guys friends before

she married your brother or that

kind of made you guys connect?

I knew her from youth group, so I met her

when I was 14 and I think she was 15 and

she started to date my brother, but we

became friends through their relationship,

so they were together for about 10 years

and she is the mother to my two nieces.

So I mean, she's family, she's

always involved.

Yes.

Yeah, she'll always be there.

I love that.

I love when you like get connected,

through marriage, whether it works

out or not, and then you just like

find your person and you're like your

best friend, so that's awesome that.

You have that outlet too, to be able

to like, give advice and share stories.

I love that you're using your

platform for that because it's such

an important thing to highlight.

So many people have, stories

of youth group or how, they

grew up, I guess you wanna say.

But yeah, I think it's really important.

Thank you.

Yeah, I'm always shocked by the stories,

so that's like one of the main things I

do is just read stories and, they're wild.

So that's why I love what you do here too.

I'm obsessed with wild stories

and I feel like we can relate.

It's funny because people will comment

on these stories that I share on YouTube

and you know, of course, like there's no

way to triple check, like if everything's

a hundred percent true, right?

It's through the eyes of the

person that sent it to me.

But I'll get comments sometimes

when people are like, there's

no way this can be real.

This sounds made up.

This is, and I'm like.

maybe part is exaggerated,

we don't really know.

But the fact of the matter is these

things happen and if we don't allow

people to share their stories, then

it, creates like an unsafe space.

So I feel like opening the doors up

to be like, Hey, this happened to me.

And it allows other people to share

their stories, to relate or be

like, wow, that was really weird

because someone did that to me too,

and now I can stand up for myself.

And I think there's so

much power in storytelling.

No, absolutely.

And I get comments like that too,

where people will be like, there's

no way these stories are real.

And I'm like, well go to the comments

and see the five other people that said

that the exact same thing happened in

their, church or wherever they grew up.

I mean, no, it's real for sure.

Yes.

Crazy things do happen.

It's so wild.

So jumping into wild stories, you, and

this is like the first time I think

I saw your content was when you were

talking about your maid of honor conned

you at your own wedding, which is

just shocking in that sentence alone.

so let's just dive in.

What happened, and I'll probably

just ask questions along the way.

'cause this is just shocking for

many people to like, comprehend.

Yeah.

I feel like a lot of questions that

people have when I say that is, oh, she

must have been someone new in your life.

'cause you know, sometimes you hit

it off with somebody and you ask them

to be in your wedding after like a

year, you know, that was not the case.

So I was actually close with

her for 17 years and 15.

Wow.

Yeah.

So we became best friends

when I was 12 and she was 19.

which is weird in hindsight, but.

At the time, I just thought I was mature

for my age and, basically we're connected.

I try to be vague because, I just try to

be vague about how I know her, but yes.

Yeah.

yeah, I knew her for 17 years.

She was always my best friend.

I am divorced, so I also got divorced

because of a Walt Disney World Burger.

That's like another crazy story

because of a Walt Disney burger.

Yes.

my ex he was very abusive and okay.

He got very mad when I shared a bite of

my burger with my cousin at Disney World.

and I didn't even give

him the burger to buy it.

I took a fork and gave him a bite of it,

and my ex said that that was disrespectful

to him as the man at the table.

it was so crazy.

Was this the

first red flag or the final red flag?

The final red flag.

And thankfully I think it made me.

Address the situation for the first

time because family members witnessed

it and he ended up threatening to strain

me in Florida and it was like a huge

fight in the middle of Disney World.

Like those viral videos that

you see of people fighting in

Disney, it's like so cringey.

That was absolutely the case.

Oh my god.

Um, so yeah, after he was abusive,

after that I finally ended up leaving.

So this best friend who I call

Crystal, she was my maid of

honor for that wedding as well.

So I just really didn't think

that there was anything I needed

to be worried about with her.

Obviously after 17 years you really

think you know someone, but all that

to say on the wedding day, there was a

situation where her husband had said, I

want to be the bartender for the wedding.

he said, this will be our gift to you.

I really want to bartend, because he was

like a very big drinker and he was always.

Making drinks.

And it was also gonna be

at a family member's house.

So it's not like we were at a

venue, it was at my grandma's house.

Right.

So as the night is going on, he had

told me how much alcohol to buy and it

seemed like the right amount of alcohol.

I mean, I bought a lot of wine, a

lot of tequila, and it wasn't a huge

wedding, it was maybe 80 people.

Mm-hmm.

So throughout the night, my maid of

honor crystal ended up coming up to me

and she was like, Hey, I'm so sorry,

but we are running out of alcohol.

There is no more alcohol left and I can

send my husband to go get some more.

And I was like, oh, well, yeah,

definitely like go and do that.

Thank you so much.

I so appreciate that you guys

are willing to go and do that.

Because it was on New Year's Eve too.

I wasn't even sure what would be open.

Right.

You know?

so yeah, I told them that I

would reimburse them for whatever

they spent on this alcohol.

So he came back, he had all of

the alcohol and it was great.

Like, I had a great time on the

wedding day and I didn't know

that anything weird had happened.

Mm-hmm.

So the next day we are at the airport on

the way to our honeymoon, and I get this

text from her and she said, Hey, I just

wanted to let you know you owe us $373.

I think it was, and that surprised me

that it was that much because I knew I had

bought so much alcohol, for this wedding.

But I was like, okay, sure.

I don't know.

What do you think about this, like

texting the day after the wedding?

Like I feel like

personally I wouldn't have

no, like, that's like, Hey, send me the

money.

Yes.

That's like their time.

I feel like I wouldn't bother the

couple right after the wedding.

Right.

I know.

And I'm like very good

about paying people back.

So, I mean, I probably would've texted

her on my own, but I. I think if it was

just that it wouldn't have mattered.

But given everything I know,

I feel like that was odd.

So I ended up venmowing her husband,

the money, we went on our honeymoon.

It was great.

And when I came back I was working

for a family business and one of the

things that my family had delegated to

me was just to pay this family member

who had dementia pay their mortgage.

So, on top of that I was also supposed

to somewhat look at the credit

card statements just to make sure

the balance didn't get too high.

Mm-hmm.

I wasn't told to look through it or

verify purchases or anything like that.

They just said make sure that it doesn't

get too high to the credit limit.

Mm-hmm.

So I'm going through it and

I noticed that the balance

seemed kind of high that month.

I was like, okay, well let

me look at what is on here.

So as I'm looking over this family

member's Bill, I see that there was

an alcohol charge on our wedding day

for $373, and that is the exact amount

that I had paid my maid of honor.

And I was like, wait, that

doesn't make any sense because

I reimbursed her husband.

But it looks like, I mean, there's

like my family member with dementia,

they do not drive, they did not

go buy this alcohol themselves.

Right.

Obviously someone took their card.

Mm-hmm.

And people would often use this

person's card to go pick up their

groceries and stuff like that.

So it would not be without outside of

the realm of possibility that Crystal

or her husband would have known

where the card was to find this card.

Because there was just a lot

of trust in these circles that

people would do the right thing.

Yeah.

Like,

here, take my card and

get groceries or, yeah.

Yeah, exactly.

Because I mean, they were relying

on people to take care of them and

pay their bills, and we all kind

of had our own responsibilities.

So mine was the mortgage and

that, but all sorts of people

were helping with their care.

So I was really confused about that.

And I ended up going and speaking with

another family member, the one who had

tasked me with going through the sheet.

And that is when he noticed, he ended

up going through their checkbook,

the family members who has dementia's

checkbook, seeing that a check was written

the day after the wedding for $500.

And in the memo line it

said wedding alcohol.

So there's another check,

another check, oh, for wedding alcohol.

And I'm like, wait, what?

Why would they have?

And it was to my maid of honors husband.

It was

directly to him?

Yes.

Yeah.

Did they know, sorry if this is a

jump in the gun, but did they know

this couple that you managed or

like looked at this person's money?

they didn't think you would ever see it?

I don't think that they knew that

I was getting the statements.

No.

I think they knew that I

helped a bit with the family.

Like I would coordinate the, lawnmower to

go out there and, take care of their home.

But I don't think that they knew that

I had access to these statements then

they definitely didn't know that I

would go and talk to another family

member and be able to see that this

check was written to Crystal's husband.

And what was their connection?

Crystal and her husband

to this family member?

Anything or just they just

knew them through you?

I try to be vague.

Okay.

yeah.

But you can put two and two together.

Yes.

Yes.

Okay.

Mm-hmm.

yeah, so I was kind of very confused

at that point because I did not know

how else to see it because it very much

seemed like they had gotten reimbursed

for something that they didn't pay for.

Mm-hmm.

So I ended up texting her and I

said, Hey, this is what I found.

Can you help me understand what this is?

Mm-hmm.

And she ended up freaking out.

She started blowing up my phone.

How dare you after everything I

have done for you, after everything

I have done for this wedding, how

dare you question me, essentially.

And, you think we need money.

We don't need money.

You think that we care enough about

$300 to do something like this?

And.

I kept asking, but you're not explaining.

Yeah.

Why are you so defensive?

You're very defensive and you're also

not explaining how that happened.

so it was just this big blow up

fight and then all of a sudden

I get a Venmo from her husband

and he sent me $500 over Venmo.

Oh.

So he took it because if you're not

guilty, you're not gonna send it back.

Yeah.

He, which I'm like, I never even

gave him the 500, but I think he

was just trying to make a point.

So he ended up sending it and was

like, here, here's this money.

How dare you?

You're horrible.

And he was just very mad that

I would dare question them.

So at that point I was just fuming and

I don't want their money at this point

'cause I'm like, Ugh, this is just gross.

I don't understand what's going on.

So I Venmo him the $500 back and

then I blocked him on Venmo so that

he wouldn't keep sending me money.

they did end up paying me back a little

bit later on, which I'll get to, but.

yeah, I was very confused by that and I

started to talk to other family members

to see what they thought and some people

who were closer to her were kind of

defensive and they didn't wanna see

and they didn't wanna hear about it.

And that was strange to me that they were

not interested in looking at the facts.

'cause I said if you guys have

another way to see it, let me know

because I just don't know how else

to take this other than it seems like

they kind of scammed to get money.

And one thing that she did say

was that he had used some of his

personal alcohol on the wedding day.

I never asked them to

do that though, ever.

Right.

So basically he said, well, I

used some of my personal alcohol

and that's why she gave me $500.

So

a lot of alcohol to like, yeah.

Yeah.

And there was only maybe 80 people there.

a lot of people, it was

a New Year's wedding.

A lot of people didn't stay till midnight.

And a lot of my family

members don't drink.

And also, there were a lot of

children at this wedding, so it's

not like we were dealing a ton

of heavy, like 80 heavy drinkers.

That's not what the situation was.

So, later on I ended up finding

that there were over 15 bottles

of unopened wine, which is insane.

at my family member's

house, it was in the pantry.

And I don't know.

'cause she had told me that

we had run out of alcohol.

So I said, Hey, we didn't

even run out of alcohol.

why did you send people off?

And she said, well, people

didn't want that alcohol.

and I kind of get that, but I

also feel like we're not rich.

And I do think that sometimes at weddings,

you know, you see people, they'll just

have red wine, white wine and beer and

there was tons of beer and wine leftover.

So it's almost like, well we just, in

theory, I don't even know if this is true,

we ran out of tequila and then he wanted

to go buy $370 worth of other alcohol.

I wish they would've asked me and

said, Hey, we only have wine left.

Do you want us to go get more or

should we just tell the guests

that there's wine and beer?

But anyway, I mean, it wouldn't

have mattered that much

if it wasn't for the scam.

Yeah.

So it's like they

wanted you to reimburse them for money.

They put on someone else's credit

card in addition to another $500.

So we're talking over $1,100 Now

if I'm doing the quick math Right.

' cause everything was added up

and they didn't actually pay

out of pocket for anything.

Yeah, exactly.

They didn't pay out of

pocket for anything.

So this whole thing blew up.

And then this is when

things got really crazy.

one of the family members who worked

at the business who found the $500

payment, I was just in shock and

wheeling and didn't know how to

handle this and was of just wondering.

I mean, this is my best friend in

theory and this is my wedding day.

I can't imagine that she would do this.

And that is when he decided to let

me in on the fact that this was not

the first time that something like

this had happened with Crystal.

Oh.

And it had gotten buried.

So basically there was a time where

I was living in Atlanta with my

ex, and I was not around the family

during the time that this all blew up.

But basically Crystal had been living

with this family member with dementia.

And she had been taking care of

her along with her husband, and

they were living in the house.

But my, family members, they were very

wealthy, you know, so it's not like

they were suffering, know, they're

living in this giant mansion, rent

free and taking care of them, which

really just meant, I don't know,

bringing them take out sometimes.

You know, it wasn't that hard of a job.

And apparently during a span of

three, maybe three to four years,

they had spent, around 300 to

$400,000 of my family members' money.

I know.

And it, it's absolute insanity.

And okay.

To this day, when I confronted

Crystal about all of this, she says,

well, they wanted me to spend it.

they wanted me to spend this money.

They told me to go buy whatever

I wanted, and absolutely not.

There's no way.

On top of that, she had drained every

single one of their bank accounts.

So my family member had had a good

amount of money and I mean, crystal

absolutely knew what she was doing

because she would take every account

to zero and then we have record that

the checks were bouncing and then

she would switch to the next account.

What?

And to the next account.

And during this time she was

going on extravagant trips.

they were, yeah, going on cruises.

They were going to DC

doing whale watching.

He was getting new tires on his car.

They even used my family member's card

to pay around $7,000 in taxes to the IRS.

Oh my gosh.

I know.

And the thing that I'm like,

this is nail in the coffin.

The same day that they put those

taxes on the card, they also got

A check for almost the exact same

amount from the family member.

so they got paid for it twice and mm-hmm.

I guarantee what happened was

Crystal went to this person and

said, oh, we owe this money.

I'm so stressed, would you please pay it?

And so not only did she kind of like

manipulate somebody who has dementia,

she ended up actually putting it

on the card and then taking the

check and making money off of that.

wild.

Yeah, it was horrible.

So the reason I didn't find out about this

was there was a huge blowup where caused

a lot of drift in the family at the time.

And when I was in Atlanta, I received

this call from Crystal and she was crying

and I mean, this is my best friend, you

know, and you feel like you always want to

have your best friend's back, so mm-hmm.

She called me crying saying,

I'm being accused of stealing.

And I didn't do this.

And they just see that a lot of money has

been spent, but they don't realize that

the reason that the credit card is so high

is because I'm paying all of the bills.

I'm paying the energy bill, I'm paying

the mortgage, I'm doing all of this.

This is why the bill seems so high,

but nobody wants to listen to me.

Mm-hmm.

and they just are want

to misunderstand me.

And she also said, and I did spend a

little too much at Dillard's one day.

She said, but you know how this

family member is, they'll tell you to

go get anything you want sometimes.

And I just spent too

much one day at the mall.

but she had told me that I could.

And honestly, that kind of tracked

my family member was like that.

She was very giving.

There would be times where before

school would start, she would give me

her card and say, I want you to go get

at least $500 worth of school clothes.

You know, and she was

just a very giving person.

But that is very different

than three to $400,000.

yeah.

I can't even comprehend that.

No, I'm like, that's an

outrageous amount of money.

And I mean, it was honestly

just crazy spending.

It was daily Starbucks, they had so

many subscription, like chewy boxes.

They had clothing subscriptions,

getting mailed to them.

Yeah.

They were also getting a maid service

get sent to their personal house.

They eventually moved out and a

maid was coming and cleaning their

house on my family member's card.

and they eventually moved to

Baltimore for her husband's work.

And while they were even living in

a different state, they were still

using her card and living off of her.

So it was just like a matter of

like, yeah, maybe a couple times.

This family member, family member

was like, yeah, you can use this to

buy Like, use my card for whatever.

But then it started taking advantage

of it and like really just like taking

it for whatever they needed and.

Lying, knowing that this

person has dementia.

Like, oh, they're not gonna realize

they're not gonna look at this and then

completely blowing up in their face.

Absolutely.

And the reason that it finally

ever came out was, somebody had, or

my family member, her husband had

asked, can you look into our money?

I feel like people keep

telling us we're broke.

People keep telling us we need

to be careful with our money,

but we don't leave the house.

why are we broke?

So finally somebody looked into it and

then they uncovered all of this theft

and there was an hour long conversation

that we actually have recorded.

That's why I feel so safe talking

about it too, is we have my family

members recorded saying we never gave

her permission to spend like that.

We thought that she was

only spending for us.

We didn't understand that she was

spending like this on the card.

So, yeah, realizing that I had

been lied to that entire time.

I think because I was in Atlanta, people

just didn't wanna get involved and tell

me, in hindsight, I wish people had told

me, I had no idea that it was that bad.

I was under the impression that,

oh no, she went on a shopping spree

and people are mad, but nobody

told me, Hey, that's not true.

Actually, she stole a lot of money

and it ended up coming out okay.

Going back to the wedding.

She also pulled another con on my

bachelorette, so it's so ridiculous.

Like it's just a pattern of behavior.

So there was another situation where we

went to Hell, the Moon, which is this

really fun piano bar with Bachelorette

and it's always super packed and it's

hard to get a table on the weekends.

So we wanted to reserve two tables

and I think it was around $260.

Mm-hmm.

And it was gonna be

split between five girls.

So my maid of honor Crystal had

sent out a text saying, here is.

How much it's gonna cost

if everybody can Venmo me.

I think it was around $56.

Everybody Venmo me $56,

for your portion of this.

And then once I found the wedding alcohol

scam, I started going back to all these

other statements and I saw that that

was also on the card and that she had

never paid for the hell at the moon.

So she's

trying to make money off of it.

Yeah.

But she didn't pay herself and she

did, she, she made money off of all of

my friends and family because, we sent

her money for that and she pocketed it.

So, it was just a pattern of behavior.

So then we started looking into it

even more and found out that not

only had she done that all those

years before, but she was still

doing it now, not to the same degree.

Wow.

Because she had been caught before.

So I think she was trying to

be a bit more careful, but

there were so many times where.

For example, there was one where it

was like zoo reimbursement and the

receipts added up to $300 and she

got a $400 check in reimbursement.

So trying to get like little

increments to like cover it up.

Yes.

And they were

buying gift cards that I went full

investigator mode at this point.

This was my entire personality for

about six months because I was like,

this is my friendship on the line.

Yes.

I wanna know what type of person this is.

So yeah.

Went full investigator.

I ended up going to Walmart.

I went to Target, I went to Lowe's,

and I asked for receipts because I

could see how much was being spent,

but I didn't know what was being spent.

Mm-hmm.

And when I did that, I found that

they were buying Visa gift cards.

So it was a way for them to get

cash and it looked like a legitimate

purchase for groceries and it wasn't so.

they came up with all sorts of

creative ways to scam pretty much.

That is wild.

I feel like someone like that is

always looking at opportunities to

like con or make money off of people.

Like as soon as you said the

bachelorette thing, I was like, I've

heard similar stories where people

not quite like that where they have

someone else's card, but it's like

maybe it wasn't as much as they said.

It was like maybe it was only 30 a person,

but they're charging everyone 50 a person.

They're like, oh, well they're

putting in tip and all this stuff.

that's why it's so hard

to like trust people.

And I'm sure that's why you kind

of then racked your brain and

you're like, wait, this is someone

that's been in my life for so long.

What else have they lied about?

I feel like you probably would just go

through all these memories and being

like, okay, what can I trust with them?

I know, absolutely.

That is what it was like.

And honestly, the more I looked into

it, like there, there's so much more,

and it's darker, you know, that I did

discover things about her that she

had lied about for years and years.

And yeah, just realizing I never

knew her was really quite crazy.

And she was just very defensive.

She refused to apologize

and I went to therapy.

I wrote her, you know, 'cause

at the time I was still a pretty

strong Christian and I was trying

to really believe in forgiveness.

So I was like, okay, I'm gonna write

her this letter with my therapist and

I'm going to say, Hey, I could forgive

you if you admitted all of this.

Like, maybe you feel backed into a corner.

Maybe you feel ashamed, maybe

you feel all of these things.

So I wrote her a letter and I

said, you know, the only way I

could ever move forward because I

am the godmother to her son too.

I mean, it's, wow.

It's very sad, you know?

I would need you to admit all of

these things and actually apologize

for it and stop making excuses.

And she wrote back this very gas

lighty letter saying, well, it's not

my fault that I was her favorite.

Oh my God.

It

was crazy.

And it was like, oh, well you just

don't understand her like I do.

And I'm like, I do actually.

I do.

So, that's, and we have her on tape

saying that she had no idea, never AAL

along with her husband who didn't have

dementia as severely as she did, you know?

Mm-hmm.

So, yeah, it was crazy.

So at that point we had to cut ties

and it's way different than like the, it's

all bad, but it's like way different than

like someone, you know, giving credit card

and she going to buy some stuff and sneak

some stuff in for herself or whatever.

But then also blatantly lying trying

to double up on that and being

like, you owe me this you know,

so it's like to never admit that.

'cause that's, that was gonna be my next

question is did she ever actually admit

to like being wrong or doing something or

she just in denial that she's innocent?

Yeah, she basically said, well,

she wanted me to have these things.

And she acts very, I don't know

if you've ever met someone like

this who acts kind of childlike.

They kind of play dumb, like, oh my gosh.

So she would just say, I'm

just so bad with money.

I'm so bad with money.

And I think when I knew that that

was not true and I absolutely knew

that she was being diabolical,

was when I saw that every single

bank account had been drained.

cause she had kind of claimed, well, I

just thought that they were super rich.

I thought that they were

okay with me having this and

that they wanted to spoil me.

but we know that that's not

the truth because every bank

account was going to zero.

And actually before they moved to

Baltimore, they specifically drained

every single account before their move.

So that was the final account that

got drained it was timed to the week

that they moved So, so calculated,

obviously you knew what you were doing.

And then when they moved to

Baltimore, they were still using,

their income that would still

come in, you know, for themselves.

Wow.

But yeah, no, she never

apologized for that.

Just saying, you know, I'm

sorry, I'm bad with money.

I'm,

yeah.

I'm like, I don't think

that's good enough.

You're well into your thirties,

I'm assuming, or something,

you know, four, maybe forties.

But at that point, it's like you

can't just use that as an excuse.

You have to be able to own up to that.

Like you're not like 15 years old

or in elementary school, you know,

whatever, where you're like, oh, I

really don't understand how money

works or how credit cards work.

It's like, no, take responsibility.

You know what you are doing.

Yeah.

But I think a lot of it came down

to the fact that there were so many

enablers around her, because I lost,

and that was what went viral in my

post, was the fact that I lost half

of my bridal party in this situation

because they were closely connected to

her and they didn't even wanna hear it.

I said, you know, I have

binders of evidence.

I will break down for

you every single thing.

And if you look at this binder and

you look at this evidence and you

tell me that she did nothing wrong.

We'll agree to disagree, but

they wouldn't even look at it.

They said, I'm not interested

in seeing what you have.

That's wild.

I know.

And just be curious.

Line loyalty, was so crazy.

And that's when I started to realize

that a lot of people had been profiting

off of these family members for years.

And it's actually, this is a

very depressing, I mean, it's

sad that it ended this way, but

both of them have since passed.

And, right before she passed away, they

actually tried to get a fake will signed.

Oh my gosh.

They're ruthless.

Ruthless.

And it was a collaborative effort.

It wasn't just my maid of honor

crystal, it was these other people

who were in my bridal party.

They all knew about it and they're

helping.

Yeah.

I mean, yeah, it was crazy.

And in this will, they had written

an original Will about 20 years

ago, because they have businesses

and it's a big deal, you know, and

they had spent time with lawyers.

This will was, oh my gosh, huge.

Mm-hmm.

Super thick.

Will, very detailed.

And these people, and Crystal tried

to go and find a will off of Google.

Like it looked so fake.

And it was a couple pages long and

it gave them the house and it gave

them, I think, an extra $500,000.

And they had her sign it when she was, so

at that point, they actually had her sign

it.

They did, they brought a notary to the

house, like, and were there lawyers,

like, no, this is bs.

This isn't a real thing.

I mean, they did have a notary

go out there and do all that, but

they thought about that in court.

the siblings, you know, they thought

about in court and it got thrown out.

The judge was like, that's not

a legitimate will, especially

when we know she had dementia.

And especially when we have a very

legitimate, thick will over here that

they obviously put a lot of time into.

Mm-hmm.

And for you to have them sign it, you

know, you know, they really didn't fight

to have their will verified either.

They kind of realized, okay, we tried,

it didn't work, nobody's buying it.

And yeah, they dropped it.

But it just shows that so many

people we're willing to take

advantage of these people.

And, yeah, so that's how I

lost half of my bridal party.

including the person who

married us, which was very sad.

One of our groomsmen actually performed

the wedding because he was my best

friend and, We don't talk to him.

So we have all of these wedding

pictures and now half of these

people I don't even talk to anymore.

it's crazy to start off by like, the

maid of honor did this but it's, the

other people are so easily convinced.

'cause it's like, did she

promise them money too?

Did she promise all these things?

So they're like, oh, what

are you talking about?

She's great.

I'm not even gonna like look

at the evidence or the facts.

I feel like I'd have such a

hard time, trusting after that.

You know, it's like all these people

that you've like, have memories

with, you have relationships

with and then they just like lie.

And we always talk about on here,

like how like, the focus is like

wedding stories and stuff like that.

But when you talked about how they had

since passed, we talk about how weddings

bring out, you know, people's true colors.

How The stress gets to people.

People power over, like others, you know.

But so do funerals.

Death brings out the true colors

in a lot of people too, because

they see it as dollar signs or What

am I gonna get from this person?

I think it's so sad when fights

happen at like funerals because

it's like, all they care about

is what did this person leave me?

And it's like, that's not what we

should be focusing on right now.

But someone like that, that's the

first thing that comes to their mind.

Absolutely.

And I mean, there were so many

times this made me so upset.

Crystal would say, she told me that

she wanted me to have the house.

And I'm like, you're not her child.

know, like, that's so inappropriate.

I don't know why you

think you're owed this.

But she really felt like she

was owed all of their money.

And she would say things to me

like in hindsight, I think I was.

You know, that's some of the darker

stuff, but I was groomed by her.

But there are things that she

would say growing up that I

start to realize were not okay.

Where she would say, you know, I've

realized if you spend time with this

family member, they give you more money.

She straight up said that to me when

I was younger and I understand that

that is her personality to do that.

So it was very hard going to the funeral.

I agree that weddings and funerals

really bring out that in people.

I had to sit in the front row and

watch her give a eulogy for this person

knowing all this.

Yeah.

We both gave eulogies and I had to

sit there and you know, at this point,

okay, well half of the people here

are defending 'cause they're also

profiting and I just have to sit here and

respect my family member's funeral and.

Try to avoid this person as

much as possible, but my hope

is to never see her again.

That, yeah,

that was probably the last kind of

event that you had to both be at, right?

Hopefully.

Yeah.

Yeah.

We live in the same city

though, so I get scared.

I mean, when I go to Barnes and Noble

or when I go to places where we all

lived on the same side of town, so it

doesn't feel outrageous that I might

run into some of them at some point.

And it does give me a lot of anxiety.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Because they're not happy that

I've shared on social media,

I'm sure, because people like that

wanna live in their, like delusions

that it's what they did isn't wrong.

and they'll convince themselves till

the day they die that they're not wrong.

they deserve what they did.

And it's like you said,

like they make up stories.

They're like, I deserve this house.

They told me I deserve the house.

And they're gonna keep

telling themselves that.

'cause that's what's gonna

make them feel good about it.

And I'm like, she might believe it.

I don't know.

She's so delusional.

I don't know.

I don't know what she really

thinks, but it's definitely wild.

Wow.

that is one of the top

wild

stories I have heard on here.

Oh my gosh.

Thanks for sharing that.

Oh my gosh, that's, yeah.

Wild.

It's a

lot for sure.

Well, I'm glad to hear too that

you've gone to like therapy

from it and like hopefully have

healed from some part of that.

I'm sure that's like a lot because

I can't imagine like someone

treating me like that, that you

had so closely in your life.

and so I think talking about it too and

sharing your story, I'm sure has helped

many people relate and connect as well.

It has because.

think hearing so many of their excuses

and them not even wanting to look at

it, you feel like you're going crazy.

I felt like I was being so

gaslit you guys, this is insane.

This is a lot of money.

This is not okay.

And sharing on TikTok and seeing

people defend or I don't know, back

me up and say, no, you're not crazy.

That is wild.

And there was like a lot of religious

manipulation as well from them

saying that I should just forgive

and move on without her even like

apologizing or admitting what she did.

Like we just need to move on.

Jesus would not want

us to fight, you know?

Which, it's just crazy, you know?

the fact that they would like to use that.

And I have nothing against

Christians in Jesus.

I actually don't share what I believe

personally, if anyone was wondering.

Um, I don't know.

It was just crazy to see religion

kind of weaponized in that way.

So it is nice going on social

media and people telling me,

Hey, that's actually okay, that

you never want to see her again.

That is valid.

Yeah.

I feel like that's, that

people pleaser mentality too.

Like, I grew up such a people

pleaser because it was like, you

just have to forgive everybody

no matter how they treat you.

Like, and it was like, you could never

just be like, Nope, cut that person out.

No.

Like, they didn't mean it that way.

And so I would always try to

see the good in every person.

And I still, I believe in seeing the good

in people, but there are just some people

that are inherently like not good and

we shouldn't waste our time trying to.

Build them up when they're

just gonna be bad to us.

You know what I mean?

kind of said that kind of weird,

but, I feel like so much of my

childhood was like, no, they're good.

They did this and this and this to me,

but like, they're still a good person.

It's like, no, you don't

have to like believe that.

No, there are bad people.

I think growing up I

always thought that too.

I just thought everybody is a good person.

Everybody's doing their best.

Sometimes people make mistakes and

unfortunately feel like the older

I get, I realize, you know, there

are wonderful people in this world.

Most people are good people, I hope.

but there definitely are

people who just don't care.

they just really do not care.

And nothing brings that

out more than social media.

seeing comments and stuff.

I'm like, wow, there are some

just crazy people in this world

who, they just wanna hurt people.

And I think learning to put up

boundaries in a healthy way has

been a big part of my healing.

Yeah.

I love that.

That's, boundaries has been huge.

We talk about that a lot here.

Okay.

so before we get to this week's

follower submission, we're gonna

do a little, red flag, green flag.

So I'm gonna read a statement,

this is wedding party edition.

And just say if it's a

red flag or a green flag.

Okay.

Ask if they can bring a

plus one you've never met.

Ooh.

oh no.

I'm gonna be like a yellow flag.

I think it depends on your relationship.

think if this was my best friend.

I would probably say maybe we

could have a game night in advance.

That way you could meet them, you

know, especially if you feel like it's

gonna be a long-term relationship.

But I guess in theory, a red flag

if you're just a casual family

member or a distant friend.

Yeah.

I don't think you should bring us one.

Yeah.

Or insist on it.

Yeah.

And I feel like I've always heard too,

like I agree with the relationship

thing 'cause you kind of know like

how close you're with someone.

I've always heard like not to ask for one.

' I remember being invited to weddings

like young, like early twenties,

where like I wasn't dating anybody

and I didn't get a plus one.

I never would've been like,

Hey, can I bring a plus one?

And then other times I would be going

to a wedding, not expecting one.

I would get one.

I was like, okay, I'll ask a

friend or something, you know?

So, makes passive aggressive

comments about the bachelorette cost.

Ooh.

Red flag.

Red flag.

I, I think if you have issues with

the cost or if you genuinely can't

afford it, there are ways to have

like healthy communication as far

as like, Hey, I'm actually broke.

Can I pick some of these activities?

And not all of them, unless you know,

somebody's willing to help with the cost.

But passive aggressive

comments definitely a red flag.

Yes.

Let's just communicate.

tries to change the vibe of

the bachelorette weekend.

Ooh, red flag.

Yeah.

I think you have to go with what the

bride wants, whatever their vibe is.

There was that guy who pulled

the con with the wedding alcohol.

He was at the Bachelorette.

We did a joint one, and he ended

up like doing this weird drinking

game where he took a deck of cards

and he would say, do you think it's

gonna be a red or a black card?

And then we would do it

and he'd say, wrong drink.

It was so weird, like We're not,

those kind of people we're not

like, take a shot kind of people.

And he was trying to change the

vibe and we were very uncomfortable.

So red flag,

you're like immediate red flag.

Yeah.

I was like, this game isn't even fun.

post wedding details

before the couple does.

Ooh.

Red flag.

That is for the couple.

Yeah.

I just read a story where the, bride's

boss announced that the girl was

engaged before the girl did and started

inviting herself to the wedding.

I was like, I can't wait to meet this

very presumptuous for like a coworker

or boss to think that they're invited

because I don't think I invited

any of my coworkers to my wedding.

I do mind you, I have my own office,

so we don't work that closely.

I probably would if we, you know, work.

I

think it depends on the job for sure.

Because yeah, when I got married, my

husband I think only invited one person

from his work because at the time was

a general manager of a restaurant.

he's like, we have way too many

people, some I never work with,

some I work with, different areas.

So he only invited one.

And then I worked in a small office where

we were like all close knit like family.

And so I invited like

20 with their plus ones.

But yeah, I think it really just

depends on your job and you should never

feel like you are gonna automatically

be invited to a coworker's wedding.

'cause just depends on your relationship.

And micro weddings are a thing,

you know, I feel like weddings

are getting smaller and smaller

because we're all broke, you know?

yeah.

So I would never assume that

I'm being invited, even if we're

like decent friends, you know?

Yes.

Because who know?

Yeah.

feel like that's one thing, like in my

early twenties, again, when I wasn't

dating anyone seriously, that I did not

understand, like, I had friends that would

just get like married with just family.

And I was like, what?

I don't get it.

Like, ' cause every wedding I'd been

to were like these big weddings or

like, a lot of people invited and

you almost were like, you can't take

it personal 'cause you're just like,

no, like, my one friend that did it.

Like she was just never wanted

to be like, all eyes on me.

Please do not, I just wanna

get married and be on with it.

And I was like, okay.

That, looking back, I'm

like, that makes sense.

it's her personality.

Yes.

Mrs. The, the rehearsal, but shows

up hungover on the wedding day.

Oh, red flag.

That's so mean.

would understand if you had something

going on, but if you were out partying

instead of going to the rehearsal.

That's not nice.

And honestly, the rehearsal

is such a beautiful time.

'cause a lot of the time

that's when they do the toast.

It's very heartfelt.

And I would feel very sad if anybody

in my bridal party missed my rehearsal.

Yeah.

If they didn't have a reason.

Right.

Yeah.

let's see, I think we had a couple

that couldn't make the rehearsal

because of one just had a new baby

and then one's flight was delayed.

But other than that, yeah.

I think most everyone came.

And I just tell people too, I'm

like, it's not the end all be

all, like if something came up.

But yeah, you always try to be there.

turns, every group chat

convo back to themselves.

Ooh, red flag.

I've known people like this

where it just goes back to them.

It's like you try so hard to

involve everybody in like, let's

talk about this person now.

And it's like, no.

It just somehow gets turned back into

like their life or their drama 24 7.

Yes.

Yes.

All right.

Last one, says, I'm just being

honest before being rude.

No, I hate that so much.

Red flag.

That is not an excuse that reminds me

of, Taylor Swift, casually cruel in

the name of being honest, you know?

Yes.

Not, okay.

It's that or the, I was just

joking after saying something.

You're so sensitive.

Oh my goodness.

Ugh.

Gosh,

that was probably like one of the most

common things I've heard to me growing up.

You're just sensitive.

You're so sensitive

to be fair.

I am so,

but yeah.

Then you learn later.

You're like, I'm proud of being sensitive.

I'm, I'm, I'm path, I'm

in tune with my doctors.

I would like to think I'm a good

person because I'm very sensitive.

Yes.

I know.

I'm like, why were we taught that?

It was like.

A bad thing to be like emotional or sad.

I feel like that's just like one

of those like patriarchal things

where it's like, where it's like,

oh, don't show your emotions.

Like you need to hide it.

Don't cry, don't do this.

So whenever like if my daughter

who's almost three, when she shows

emotion, I'm like, it's okay.

Be sad.

Are you frustrated?

Are you angry?

Do you need space?

Like trying to be that like overly like I

think that's one thing you feel your inner

child.

Yes.

I think that's one thing.

Millennial parents are like doing better

than like the generation, again, not

critiquing the previous one, but I

feel like it was very just we always

try to like improve the previous

generation and I feel like we were told

a lot don't cry, don't be emotional.

And I always try to like hide

my tears if I was upset and I'm

like, no, you own that emotion.

it's fine.

Let's name it.

I know I was such an emotional kid.

I don't even know why I was so

emotional, but, I think when I was

in first grade, my teacher actually

came up to me and said, I'm going to

make a calendar and mark every day

that you cry and show it to your mom.

Oh my God.

To be fair, I was a very emotional kid.

but I was like, oh, okay.

Don't cry anymore.

You know, or else she's

gonna go tell my mom.

Was she saying it like

in a mean way or like

Yes.

Yes.

In a mean way.

I'm gonna mark it down.

Just to be fair, I was bullied because

I had an afro when I was a kid and

the kids used to call me cotton ball.

They were so mean.

Kids are, they are ruthless.

Yeah.

But it's okay.

I forget that they were children, but, oh

my gosh.

I had a kid one time.

Tell someone that I looked like a

chipmunk because of my big front teeth.

Oh my gosh.

No.

But I was so proud of myself.

'cause looking back, so like in

elementary, I was really shy and this

was in high school and I was friends

with a girl that was like cooler than me.

Like she was like friends with everybody.

And I was just like, oh my gosh, I'm

friends with her because I was like

really like shy she was talking to

these boys and this boy said it to

her, something about like chipmunk.

And she came and told me I go,

you think I look like a chipmunk?

And I like called him out and

then he was embarrassed, so I

was like, yeah, so don't do that.

Good for you.

That's like the epitome of

what an odd thing to say.

Yes.

Yeah.

What a weird thing to say out loud.

Yeah.

Repeat it.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh.

Okay, let's get into this

week's, follower submission.

So these are real stories people send

me, so let's just react as we go.

I. Okay.

I met the bride through mutual friends,

the kind of friendly magnetic girl who

seemed to pull people into her orbit.

She was newly engaged,

excited, and quickly invited

me to be in her inner circle.

Her fiancé and their two best guy

friends, Matt and Bill, before long

were all hanging out constantly.

Somehow, without realizing it, I became

the person she relied on the most.

She knew I sewed and weddings are

expensive, so when she admitted she was

stressed about her budget, I offered to

make her bridesmaid dresses for free.

I genuinely wanted to help.

This is like the case of the people

pleaser with like the, I don't know

what you would call the other person.

Like the energy, like vampires.

Thicker.

Yes.

Oh my gosh.

That's so much work.

I can't even imagine.

I can't even imagine making one, let

alone however many bridesmaids she had

and tailoring all of those.

To the bridesmaids.

Wow.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh my gosh.

She must have brought it up a lot in

front of this girl to be like, okay, I'll

make 'em, I'll make all these dresses.

Oh, you so, oh, well, I'm

having the hardest time.

Yes.

What am I gonna do?

You know, which, I mean, hey,

that's kind of how Crystal was.

Crystal was the type of person where

she would like, going back to like

the theft and everything, she would

say, well, she would offer, and it's

like, yeah, she has dementia and if

you go up to her and say, oh my gosh,

I have no money, I have no, whatever.

You know, it was very much that type of

situation where if you go and whine about

your problems, like loud enough, then

obviously her being like a good Christian

woman, she was going to offer to give you,

right.

There's those kinds of people that.

That's how they were raised is

like, you help someone in need.

Right?

And then there's the people that

take advantage of those people.

'cause they're like, oh,

they're not gonna tell me no.

Like, yeah.

I'll have a convenient breakdown around

the person who has something I want.

Uhhuh.

Oh yeah, okay.

So then within days the warning

signs started popping up.

Her aunt who had flown in from overseas

suddenly decided she wanted to take

over making the dresses, despite not

knowing how to sew properly, shocked to

absolutely no one, the dresses fell apart.

How did that work?

Like if the one girl's like, I'm

gonna sell these dresses, and it's

like, jk, like, I'm gonna do it like.

It's like, why would

you volunteer for that?

To me, that sounds like a nightmare.

If I found out that somebody

else was handling that, I'd be

like, thank you for doing that.

I don't wanna do that.

Like

a control thing or something.

But I'd also as a bride be

like, no, my friend's got it.

Like, she knows what she's doing.

Yeah.

Oh, this is weird.

the bride came back to me in tears

begging me to fix everything, and

then came the kicker she said as a

payment for making all the dresses.

She'd make me a bridesmaid.

Wait, she wasn't even a

bridesmaid at this point

because people are

dying to be bridesmaids.

Okay.

I don't know like that.

That's the thing.

I thought this whole time

she was a bridesmaid.

I know.

To do all of that work and

not even be a bridesmaid.

Yeah.

Wow.

I

feel like when you accept being a

bridesmaid, you understand that you're

gonna get delegated something, a couple

tasks, you know, or something like that.

But to do all of that when she

hasn't known her that long.

Yeah.

She's an owner that

looks all the bridesmaid.

That's like not even something

I would ever be able to do.

I would rather help pay Yeah.

For the bridesmaids dresses

than to make them myself.

Oh,

a hundred percent.

yeah.

You don't want me making

a bridesmaid dress.

That thing would fall apart.

Also, like the whole

thing is kinda odd to me.

I mean, there's more, but, anyone

that says as payment, you can be a

bridesmaid is in my mind, already

gonna be a bridezilla because they

think it's an honor to be a bridesmaid.

yes, like close friends of mine

would say, you know, like, oh,

I would love to be by yourself.

Of course, like if that

mutual relationship.

But if someone says it as like a

gift, I'm doing you a favor to be

a bridesmaid in my royal wedding,

that just says red flag to me.

And it also implies that your relationship

was not good enough in the first

place for you to be a bridesmaid.

And you're getting this as.

Payment.

Like I don't understand how

that's supposed to feel good.

Yeah.

Feels bad to me.

Right.

It's like you can't even pay

her for the cost of the fabric.

She's getting her time.

Like, I don't know.

I told her that meant she'd have to

pick only one of her guy friends to be a

groomsman, which I thought wasn't fair,

I don't know why that would be, but,

she shrugged and said, oh, that's fine.

I never wanted Matt in the wedding anyway.

So you have to say yes.

I should have run then, God, I

should have run a few weeks later.

She wouldn't stop complaining about not

having a venue for her bridal shower.

She knew my parents lived on a one acre

property and she dropped a hint after

Hint after hint until I was uncomfortable.

I feel like I see a lot of similarities

with the person that, you know, I just

feel like trying to take advantage

of somebody to get what they want.

No, that's so uncomfortable.

Like it sounds like she made her

the bridesmaid so that she could

get all this stuff from her.

Mm-hmm.

Honestly, Okay.

Going back to Crystal.

I mean, I wish I had picked up on it

sooner, but she would often have friends

for about a year or two, and then they

would have a falling out and it was

always, oh, she was crazy or, okay.

can't believe I didn't even

get into how crazy Crystal was.

Okay.

She would also say that,

everybody was in love with her.

She used to be very careful about

like being around men because any man

would cheat on their wife with her.

Oh

my gosh.

She

also said that if she just tried,

she would be able to be a Peloton

instructor, and then she was

like, I would, I'll be a little,

as d Lulu as Crystal.

I think we can, yeah, she would say, I

would try out for American Idol, but I

would win, you know, and I don't wanna

be famous, so she was just a very high

sense of self and I think like growing

up with her, after knowing somebody like

that, since you're 12 years old, you

just kind of think that that's normal.

And I honestly think that's why I

ended up with my crazy narcissistic

ex was I was so used to grandiose,

odd behavior, from people around me

that it just, like, he was the same.

He thought he was gonna own Disney.

It's a whole thing.

All of that to say like, these people, oh

my gosh, they know how to get their way.

You know?

Yeah.

And it's like, it's that

same kind of mentality of She

sees her as week over here.

If I can make her a bridesmaid,

make her feel included, she'll gimme

all the things I want for my day.

And just seeing her as a dollar sign

or seeing her as an opportunity.

And you see that with like weddings

and, just friendships in general.

I've seen where it's like, they use you

for what they need you for, and then they

move along to the next person And what you

said too about Crystal saying like, all

these friendships, oh, they were crazy.

Same goes for like, if you ever meet

a guy and all their exes were crazy,

probably not the exes just saying

Absolutely.

My ex said the same thing.

He told me his ex was absolutely insane.

And when we got divorced,

I mean this was just.

I did a series, did I marry

a psychopath on TikTok?

And throughout the series I ended

up reaching out to his ex and I

found out the true story and he was

horrible to her and was abusive to her.

So like these people, they will lie.

So, oh, that's why I brought up

Crystal saying that her friendships

would only last a year or two.

I'm wondering if this is realizing that

none of her friends are coming through

or if they're helping her and she's

needing to recruit people to help her.

Yes, because I mean, she might

not be that nice and maybe

her friends don't wanna help.

They're all and everybody else

is fed up, but you're new, so

Yes,

she's gonna try.

They're in the honeymoon

friend stage where everything's

perfect and she's great.

She said, I finally offered to ask my

parents, and they being lovely, said yes.

She was elated and even told me,

you're welcome to invite your family

to the party at their own house.

Can you imagine saying that to somebody?

your parents, out of the goodness of my

heart, don't have to flee their home.

Yeah.

That's crazy.

That's horrible.

That is.

That's insane behavior.

Bridezilla.

Yeah.

See, and that would give me

a red flag right off the bat.

But like, I don't know.

Just in general, I'd be like, no.

Like, something's up.

It's like you're in so deep at this point.

Yeah.

that should tell you everything

you need to know about her.

The night before the shower, I was

supposed to finish the dresses instead.

She and half the wedding party spent the

night at my house decorating the yard.

I didn't sew a single stitch,

and somehow she yelled at me

for not finishing the dresses.

I'd be like, do 'em yourself.

Bye.

What?

She's your servant.

This is so atrocious.

cut off the French.

I assume that that's where

the story is going, but I hope

so.

Wow.

The audacity

wild.

The next day she forced Matt and

Bill to act as waiters at her

bridal shower, which was weird.

Then in front of the entire

room, she made an announcement.

She was changing her maid of honor.

Her sister was now her maid of honor.

Her childhood best friend Sarah, who

had already been asked, was moved to

the very end of the bridesmaid lineup.

She's doing this in public,

in front of everybody.

One that's terrible.

Two, I think the whole bridesmaid

lineup thing is weird to be like,

okay, you're number four now.

Like I did mine by like height

or how long I knew them for,

like, I was not, like, I felt

very uncomfortable

trying to line people up.

Luckily, a lot of my brides.

my bridesmaids were family.

So I felt kind of okay putting the

family first, because I thought

my other friends would understand.

But it is awkward trying to be like,

it's, and you here and sorry, or No,

I feel like I ultimately

went by how long I knew them.

'cause like my maid of honor was first,

then I had my sister, a cousin, and

then I of course had my husband, like

sister-in-laws and towards the end

just 'cause of like length of time plus

we just wanted them to like walk with

their partner or their husband and Yeah.

but I have heard of that where people

are like, okay, well I'm her best friend.

Or I don't know.

That's that's to

demote somebody who was the

maid of honor that's so evil.

Yeah.

And publicly like.

Did I miss?

Why do we know?

Why?

See, she didn't say it yet.

Okay.

She goes,

and I was bumped to girl number three,

so she's like, basically like ranking

them literally in front of them.

So Maid of honor moved to number

four, I'm guessing number four.

She just says at the end of the lineup.

And then the girl that wrote in

was bumped to girl number three.

So weird.

Oh, so strange.

I watched Sarah's face fall.

She held it together until later

when she called me sobbing.

I listened, comforted her

and texted her afterwards.

I'm so sorry you're going through this.

If things get too stressful,

you can always talk to me.

Harmless, supportive, kind.

This is gonna backfire.

I just know it except the bride

somehow ended up with Sarah's

phone and saw my text message.

She called me screaming of accusing

me, of trying to steal her friend,

demanding to know whose side I was on,

saying she needed to reevaluate whether

she even wanted me in the wedding.

I would be like, bye.

No.

I mean, what am I getting out

of this dynamic right now?

Yeah.

Like nothing at this point.

This is so toxic.

This feels like it's, this

is some Regina George stuff.

Yes.

Oh my gosh.

Totally.

I was like, this does sound familiar.

it's Regina George.

It's like, I'm always on your left.

Well now you're on my last nerve.

Get my, you know, whatever.

It's like the calls, the three-way calls

where you're trying to trick each other.

that is so toxic.

Oh my god.

We should have changed the

names to like mean girl names.

Perfect.

It really is.

Oh my gosh, that's wild.

unfortunately for me, she

decided to keep me and even

more unfortunately, I said yes.

On the big day, she transformed into

a full diva, rude to everyone snapping

at vendors, insulting bridesmaids.

so this girl knew how to turn on

the switch of like, I'm so fun.

I'm your new friend, let's hang out.

I'm awesome.

And then I feel like

people like that can just,

yeah,

flip.

I'm like transformed into a diva.

I feel like she's been a diva,

but I guess just turned up a ton.

Like

didn't hide it anymore

or even try to, yeah.

Oh

my gosh, this groom.

Can you imagine being

married to this woman?

I can't.

I always wonder cause I feel like we

don't hear about the grooms a lot in these

stories unless it's like focused on them.

So either take the backseat,

like they're really quiet or just

like whatever their door thing.

Or I wonder if they're just as terrible

and they're just like part of it.

But I don't know,

maybe.

her mother then informed us that

we had to pay for our own hair

and makeup, even though I had

made all the dresses for free.

after the ceremony, her gown

ripped, guess who had to get down

on her hands and knees and sew it?

Me.

She should make the wedding dress right.

Right.

No, as far as I know.

Oh,

gosh.

And like I get having, like, most

weddings I've been a part of,

there's hair and makeup there, and

if you want it done, you pay for it.

But I feel like as the bride, if

I knew my maid of honor or like a

bridesmaid made all the dresses,

I'd be like, let me pay for this.

how can I pay you?

But it sounds like this woman

just treats her as like a servant.

Her sisters-in-law yelled at me to hurry

up because I was holding up the reception.

It's not her fault.

The dress ripped.

Holy cow.

Be like,

fine.

Go out there.

Have fun.

Yeah, go do

it.

Yeah.

If you can do it faster, you go ahead.

Like, my God.

By the time evening fell, Sarah

and I ended up locked in the

bridal room crying in her speech.

The bride didn't mention Sarah

at all, all she said about me was

she made the bridesmaid dresses.

I don't know why the bridesmaids

are in the speech, or what the

speech is, but interesting.

Yeah.

after the wedding, the invites

to hang out with the group

became fewer then non-existent.

One night I literally ran into all

of them out together without me.

I'd be like, good.

When I finally confronted her, she

screamed, I'm not married to you.

I don't have to invite you to anything.

This lady, woman, like so evil.

She knew what she was doing.

She got what she wanted out

of her, and that was dresses.

That was it.

she said, and that was it.

Friendship.

Over months later, I heard she ended up

doing the same thing to Matt and Bill.

I have no idea if she and Sarah ever

recovered their friendship but me.

I walked away and honestly, that

was the best decision I ever made.

Oh my gosh, what a blip in your life.

I'm like, what a horrible, I cannot

imagine being around somebody who

treats people like such dirt and the

fact that nobody stood up to her or

really said like, I feel like there

is this vibe with weddings where

the bride can just do whatever she

wants because it's her wedding.

But I feel like at a point I

would like to think that people

in my life or I would've.

Stood up to this person

because Yes, that is insane.

You can't treat people like that.

Well, and the fact that the mom seemed

to have like some attitude too on the

wedding day sounds like that's where

she gets it from the entitlement.

But yeah, I just never get that.

Like, it's my day.

Like it's all about me.

Like I just don't get that.

Like, I was just telling someone, I'm

like, for my wedding morning, I made

sure my bridesmaids were taken care of.

Like I had breakfast for them, mimosas.

Like, I remember running around

making sure like they were good.

what do you need?

Because I was like, I just want you here

with me and I want you to enjoy yourself.

but I've definitely seen both sides of

it where it's like there's brides that

wanna take care of their wedding party and

there's brides that are like, it's my day.

you just stand by my side.

Oh my gosh.

That's why they're

pretty much props.

I mean, she was a prop and a way to get.

Dresses, which, I mean, that is so

much work, you know, and it's not even

how much are bridesmaids dresses, like

maybe 150 or however much, you know, on

top of that, it's handmade, you know?

So it's worth so much more than that,

know, because of all of the hard

work and the hours that she put in.

Yeah.

That

is, ugh.

So toxic, so glad that she

does not talk to her anymore.

Yeah.

I think I'd be the most mad about

making the dresses, because I think

if I were like a bridesmaid for a

wedding where this happened, I would

just look back and laugh at it.

I'd be like, that was wild.

Okay, moving on.

But the fact that she spent so much time

and really thought this person was like a

friend of hers, she let her parents lent

the house, to them that's just Got it.

Yeah.

It's like she was trying

to find ways to cut costs.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Because

also, how do you not know where

your bridal shower's gonna be?

Yeah.

leading up to it.

You know what I mean?

it feels like she was scoping

out locations pretty much.

Mm-hmm.

How can I get somebody to gift this to me?

Yeah.

It's like she had something planned

somewhere else and then it was like she

messed up that relationship or something.

I wouldn't be someone else.

Yeah.

I feel like this so often though, where

friendships don't make it past the

wedding or friendships just fizzle out.

I yeah, so I was in that religious cult.

It was not just Christianity,

it was called Bethel School

of Supernatural Ministry.

It was super weird.

People Okay.

Thought they could raise people from

the dead and it was like, prophecy.

It was insanity.

But I met a girl there and she invited

me to be in her wedding and it was like I

hadn't seen her in person in over a year.

We had gone back to our home states.

We were not close.

We would talk once every four months.

I mean, we were not close, but I really

feel like she just needed somebody else.

On her side.

Mm-hmm.

so I literally flew to Utah and I went and

I was in her wedding and during that time

I ended up getting engaged to my ex. And

I felt like I had to ask her to be in mine

because I was in hers, but I didn't view

her as a friend, but I was in her wedding

and we were engaged at the same time.

So it kind of felt like, well,

I can't be her bridesmaid

and she not be in my wedding.

So we literally were in each

other's weddings and we have

never seen each other again.

Like, like it's so random, you

know, there's no bad blood.

She still follows me on social media,

but it's like I mean, it was very

strange and there was really no

reason to be in each other's weddings.

That is so funny.

That is really like common, I

feel like where if like you're in

someone's wedding, you feel like

you have to ask them to be in yours.

my husband and I had those talks before

getting married because we were like

considered the wedding couple for so long.

'cause we were both in so many weddings.

I think we were each in like

10 weddings or something.

And we both had that discussion

about like, okay, should we have

this person because we were in

their wedding and vice versa.

And the end of the day I was just like,

I'm gonna have who I want on my side.

But again, like if I, I think if I

would've gotten married like in my

early twenties or something, I think

it would've been way different.

I think I would've been like, yes, yes.

Include everybody have this person

or if he's having his friend, I

should probably have his like wife

or girlfriend in it or partner.

But at the end of the day, it's

just like, no, people understand.

Yeah.

But yeah, it's awkward when you feel like

obligated to like have someone in your

wedding that you're not that close with.

I definitely feel like I've been

asked to be in weddings where.

And I've said yes.

And then I'm and I'm like, I

just asked because of something.

And then I'm like, I don't know.

Maybe I shouldn't have said yes.

But I don't know, I love

being a part of weddings.

I find stuff to do.

I'm very handy.

I always offer to help.

And so I feel like that's seen, you know?

Yeah.

I'm like, I'm a good bridesmaid.

I'm a good one.

You know, I put in work, so I mean, yeah.

I get that.

Yeah, for sure.

Awesome.

Well that was a wild story.

I always like to end these

with, confessions that

people send me on Instagram.

So I'll just read a couple of those

and then we go, okay, these are our

biggest wedding regrets people sent me.

Okay.

Our photographer, had a digital

camera, but acted like he only

had film, took forever to get

pictures, and he missed so many.

We wanted because took forever to set up.

each shot ended up, oh, he would

take forever for a shot and ended

up taking only one photo each time.

So frustrating.

I'd say time and time again.

Your photographer is like one

of the most important vendors.

If you have a bad photographer,

It just, it could ruin it.

I know.

I'm like, to me, that is one

of the most important things.

I'm so thankful.

I had, a friend who I had done photo

shoots with out in Atlanta, and I actually

flew her out and she gave us such a, deal

on it, but she's a wedding photographer,

so thankfully she was incredible.

But it's like once you find a good

photographer, stick with them.

Just yes.

Keep using them, you know?

Yes.

don't just like, agree to have

someone, be it because they're giving

it to you for free or something,

or, I've seen a lot of those too.

It's just go with your gut.

For sure.

let's see.

making my sister-in-law, my

matron of honor years later, she

said she never even liked me.

ow.

That would really hurt me.

Yeah.

Yeah, hiring the hairdresser I

did, she made me an hour and a

half late for my own wedding.

Oh, that's another one

that is super important.

I got my hairdresser.

Yeah.

I probably should have done

more research on my hairdresser.

I did a trial with her and it was okay.

And then on the wedding day, my

hair looked completely different.

And I had even, yeah, the back

of it looked totally different.

Like the way that it had

was pinned and all of it.

so I showed she had to redo it, and kid

you not, I looked like snooky, like I

had a bump and I was horrified because

that was not there in the original trial.

And I was like, I'm gonna walk down and

look like so insane and not like myself.

Yes.

Literally.

And I also look like a southern

beauty queen a little bit.

It was very weird vibes and thankfully

they fixed it, but I was for

sure panicking on my wedding day.

Oh my gosh.

definitely been a part of a

lot of weddings where like,

they just hired someone, like

they didn't do like the trial.

And when the person comes in, it's just

like, there was one wedding where I was

in and I said no to hair and makeup.

I was like, I'll just do it myself.

I was glad I did because everyone ended

up washing off their makeup because it

was like someone that had like, hardly

any experience like everyone's hair

kept falling off and their eyelashes

were falling off and I had just done

them myself and I'm no professional.

I'm like not great at makeup, but I just

like, I don't know, I just was like,

I don't wanna spend a lot of money.

And everyone's like,

eyelashes were falling off.

it was not making it

to the wedding at all.

So it's hard sometimes.

You don't know what you're

gonna get until wedding day.

But yeah,

I prefer, especially my hair,

I prefer to do it myself.

'cause I have like such

thick, curly hair that Yeah.

Uh, they botch it most of the time.

Yes.

Oh my gosh.

Wow.

Well thank you so much for coming on.

It was so great chatting with you

and sharing your story and just.

Diving through this wedding drama.

Yeah.

Thank you so much for having me.

This was so much fun.

It was like such a happier

topic than what I'm used to,

you know?

Yes.

well for everyone listening, can you

again share where they can find more of

your content, anything fun you're working

on and, anything else that's coming up?

Yeah.

I am at Jubilee Dawns on

TikTok and on Instagram.

I also have a YouTube and my two podcasts

are Heald Dish and the Overshare Hour.

Awesome.

Well, thanks again for coming on.

All right.

Thank you.