1 00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:04,660 This video is brought to you by Babbel. 2 00:00:04,660 --> 00:00:10,200 Babel is an ad free and the number 1 language learning app used by over 10 million users 3 00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:11,200 worldwide. 4 00:00:11,200 --> 00:00:15,379 We will talk more about Babbel at the end of the video but for now let’s get on with 5 00:00:15,379 --> 00:00:20,369 how to be happy from the wisdom of Confucius. 6 00:00:20,369 --> 00:00:26,090 Confucius was a Chinese philosopher, political figure and a teacher, and who stressed upon 7 00:00:26,090 --> 00:00:31,970 the importance of loyalty, morality and kindness for a meaningful and happy life. 8 00:00:31,970 --> 00:00:37,661 He is considered to be one of the greatest Eastern philosophers of all time, and his 9 00:00:37,661 --> 00:00:40,980 teachings are commonly known as analects. 10 00:00:40,980 --> 00:00:47,080 His school of thought or perspective of life is called Confucianism by his followers and 11 00:00:47,080 --> 00:00:52,690 this Confucian school of thought revolves around four virtues that all human beings 12 00:00:52,690 --> 00:00:54,650 should possess. 13 00:00:54,650 --> 00:01:04,250 These are: Benevolence or ren, righteousness or yi, fulfillment of rights or li and moral 14 00:01:04,250 --> 00:01:06,620 wisdom or zhi. 15 00:01:06,620 --> 00:01:13,280 A fifth virtue, faith or xin was also added later into the Chinese culture that resembles 16 00:01:13,280 --> 00:01:21,530 the five elements: earth, water, fire, wood and metal, to illustrate a close link between 17 00:01:21,530 --> 00:01:24,719 physical and moral aspects. 18 00:01:24,719 --> 00:01:30,109 According to Confucius, happiness doesn’t mean to get everything one desires in life, 19 00:01:30,109 --> 00:01:36,990 but rather it means as well as the satisfaction you get from fulfilling your desires, happiness 20 00:01:36,990 --> 00:01:42,740 is also knowing that the methods you used in achieving those things were moral. 21 00:01:42,740 --> 00:01:48,969 For over 2500 years, Confucius has been a source of inspiration for people around the 22 00:01:48,969 --> 00:01:55,039 world seeking happiness and meaning in their lives and in this video we bring you 6 ways 23 00:01:55,039 --> 00:01:59,520 to be happy from the wisdom of Confucius. 24 00:01:59,520 --> 00:02:01,299 1. 25 00:02:01,299 --> 00:02:07,319 Invest in intimate relationships Confucius says “What you do not want done 26 00:02:07,319 --> 00:02:11,470 to yourself, do not do to others”. 27 00:02:11,470 --> 00:02:17,010 This is the famous golden rule of which Confucius was very much an advocate. 28 00:02:17,010 --> 00:02:23,340 One of the four fundamental Confucian virtues is ren, which means a sense for the dignity 29 00:02:23,340 --> 00:02:29,660 of human life, a feeling of humanity towards others and self-esteem for yourself. 30 00:02:29,660 --> 00:02:35,430 Confucius thought ren is what makes life worth living, it is the ultimate guide to human 31 00:02:35,430 --> 00:02:39,600 action, the foundation of all human relationships. 32 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:45,680 Simply put, it is about treating others the way you want to be treated, but this teaching 33 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:48,020 goes much deeper than this. 34 00:02:48,020 --> 00:02:52,830 In every action you do in your life, you have to be mindful of others. 35 00:02:52,830 --> 00:02:59,790 For Confucians, the most natural and important site for the expression of ren is the family. 36 00:02:59,790 --> 00:03:02,000 This starts in your home. 37 00:03:02,000 --> 00:03:07,760 You have to cultivate compassion and kindness first with yourself, then with your family, 38 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:15,250 then with your friends, then with your community, your nation and, ultimately, the entire human 39 00:03:15,250 --> 00:03:17,550 species. 40 00:03:17,550 --> 00:03:23,060 If everybody followed this golden rule, the world would be a much better place. 41 00:03:23,060 --> 00:03:28,820 Applying the golden rule into your relationships creates harmony around you and this leads 42 00:03:28,820 --> 00:03:30,910 to happiness. 43 00:03:30,910 --> 00:03:37,860 To apply best practice to Confucian principles, you need to treat others with sincerity, morality 44 00:03:37,860 --> 00:03:41,950 and compassion, just as you want to be treated by them. 45 00:03:41,950 --> 00:03:47,420 You can start by investing in your intimate relationships, with your family members, your 46 00:03:47,420 --> 00:03:49,910 partner, your friends. 47 00:03:49,910 --> 00:03:56,000 You need to treat them fairly, sincerely, compassionately, not to gain something in 48 00:03:56,000 --> 00:04:02,840 return, but because cultivating compassion and creating harmony is such a vital aspect 49 00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:09,010 of living a happy and moral life, of showing how much you care for your loved ones. 50 00:04:09,010 --> 00:04:14,430 If you have trouble showing your loved ones how much you care for them, start smiling 51 00:04:14,430 --> 00:04:19,720 more, greet them warmly every time you meet them, ask about their well-being and listen 52 00:04:19,720 --> 00:04:26,189 carefully to them, be honest in the way you speak, and be fair to each of them. 53 00:04:26,189 --> 00:04:31,379 Keep this up long enough and you will get a reputation for being a great person that 54 00:04:31,379 --> 00:04:34,120 everybody would want to be around. 55 00:04:34,120 --> 00:04:39,849 If you are respecting them, they in turn will start respecting you more, treating you more 56 00:04:39,849 --> 00:04:46,750 fairly, with more sincerity, more compassion and, ultimately, making you feel more loved, 57 00:04:46,750 --> 00:04:49,050 more respected and happier. 58 00:04:49,050 --> 00:04:54,719 Thus, investing in your relationships with the people around you is a fundamental step 59 00:04:54,719 --> 00:04:57,350 towards happiness. 60 00:04:57,350 --> 00:04:59,310 2. 61 00:04:59,310 --> 00:05:06,509 Think of the consequences Confucius tells us “When anger rises, think 62 00:05:06,509 --> 00:05:09,050 of the consequences.” 63 00:05:09,050 --> 00:05:15,310 We have all experienced those unpleasant moments when we feel our adrenaline rushing through 64 00:05:15,310 --> 00:05:21,180 our body, when we feel like punching someone in the face or using harsh words that we know 65 00:05:21,180 --> 00:05:22,860 we’ll regret afterwards. 66 00:05:22,860 --> 00:05:29,590 We, in the west, believe that anger is justified if one is angry at the right time and in the 67 00:05:29,590 --> 00:05:30,939 right context. 68 00:05:30,939 --> 00:05:36,319 However, according to Confucius if we are angry at someone, then we are defeated by 69 00:05:36,319 --> 00:05:37,319 them. 70 00:05:37,319 --> 00:05:43,039 There is no such thing as a good amount of anger and it is extremely important to think 71 00:05:43,039 --> 00:05:48,360 of the consequences when an emotion like anger arises. 72 00:05:48,360 --> 00:05:54,139 Controlling ourselves is not always easy, but there is a big reward in being capable 73 00:05:54,139 --> 00:05:59,400 of training your mind to be in control of how you react. 74 00:05:59,400 --> 00:06:05,719 One of the best ways to start practicing self-control is to look deep into the future, to think 75 00:06:05,719 --> 00:06:10,990 not only about the first-order consequences like the pleasure we get from punching someone 76 00:06:10,990 --> 00:06:17,199 in the moment for example, but also at the second-order consequences like the fact he 77 00:06:17,199 --> 00:06:22,610 might punch you back or that you may get into some kind of brawl which will cause further 78 00:06:22,610 --> 00:06:28,770 physical injuries, or third-order consequences like it might break your friendship with that 79 00:06:28,770 --> 00:06:33,840 person, or even fourth-order consequences like if your other friends might stop respecting 80 00:06:33,840 --> 00:06:36,100 you and so on. 81 00:06:36,100 --> 00:06:41,960 We need to avoid this tendency of obtaining immediate pleasure if this comes at the cost 82 00:06:41,960 --> 00:06:45,229 of losing something much more important in the future. 83 00:06:45,229 --> 00:06:50,240 Let’s say, at your workplace, before expressing your anger against your boss or against one 84 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:55,650 of your colleagues during a meeting, try to take a deep breath and ask yourself: is it 85 00:06:55,650 --> 00:06:59,719 worth it to point out that their idea or approach is stupid, straightaway? 86 00:06:59,719 --> 00:07:05,490 Sure, it will make me feel good in the moment showing how smart I am, but how will this 87 00:07:05,490 --> 00:07:07,680 affect my relationship with them? 88 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:11,879 And furthermore, how will that affect my job in the long run? 89 00:07:11,879 --> 00:07:17,431 Now that you are aware of the long term consequences, you can be more mindful of your anger, and 90 00:07:17,431 --> 00:07:22,610 you can always choose to present your argument in a gentler way to the other person, taking 91 00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:25,590 their feelings and self-esteem into account. 92 00:07:25,590 --> 00:07:32,499 Anger is a poor guide to happiness and if you truly want to seek happiness, first think 93 00:07:32,499 --> 00:07:36,610 of the consequences, then act. 94 00:07:36,610 --> 00:07:38,099 3. 95 00:07:38,099 --> 00:07:44,090 Keep it simple To quote Confucius; “Life is really simple, 96 00:07:44,090 --> 00:07:47,240 but we insist on making it complicated”. 97 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:53,550 A simple life is a life that gives you freedom from issues that should not really be of major 98 00:07:53,550 --> 00:07:55,009 concern. 99 00:07:55,009 --> 00:08:00,189 Simplicity is all about focusing on what's most important to you and letting go of the 100 00:08:00,189 --> 00:08:01,729 rest. 101 00:08:01,729 --> 00:08:05,469 Confucian teachings portray life in this simplest form. 102 00:08:05,469 --> 00:08:09,249 The way we perceive our life can make all the difference. 103 00:08:09,249 --> 00:08:14,660 For an optimistic person, life is a beautiful gift that has many opportunities and things 104 00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:20,560 to enjoy, but a pessimist typically takes life for granted and thinks of his stagnant 105 00:08:20,560 --> 00:08:23,259 life as a mess that cannot be settled. 106 00:08:23,259 --> 00:08:30,439 They will try to push it forward by overthinking something, by overdoing a task or constantly 107 00:08:30,439 --> 00:08:35,610 avoiding something or someone, but will forget that in doing so they will end up creating 108 00:08:35,610 --> 00:08:40,229 more hassle and make life even more complicated for themselves. 109 00:08:40,229 --> 00:08:46,100 To not enjoy the simple things and fixate on what you don't have only disturbs your 110 00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:48,529 mental and physical health. 111 00:08:48,529 --> 00:08:53,520 In today’s modern world, this simplicity can rarely be seen. 112 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:55,680 Our minds love to think. 113 00:08:55,680 --> 00:09:02,570 So it thinks and thinks about things, spinning stories around and around. 114 00:09:02,570 --> 00:09:09,390 It goes on and on, weaving complicated plots and dialogues that never - nor ever will - happen. 115 00:09:09,390 --> 00:09:14,139 Like wearing your best outfit for a party or a wedding, you are constantly thinking 116 00:09:14,139 --> 00:09:17,199 about other people’s opinions about it. 117 00:09:17,199 --> 00:09:21,709 You fear that you may not look attractive and that thought makes you unhappy. 118 00:09:21,709 --> 00:09:27,029 It is all happening in your head and you keep on over thinking. 119 00:09:27,029 --> 00:09:32,470 The simple solution to this is to just wear an outfit that makes you feel comfortable 120 00:09:32,470 --> 00:09:34,620 and which makes you happy. 121 00:09:34,620 --> 00:09:36,130 Life is simple. 122 00:09:36,130 --> 00:09:40,459 It is we, the human beings, that are complicated. 123 00:09:40,459 --> 00:09:46,100 We need to change this habit of ours, of making life complicated. 124 00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:49,470 You can start by regularly asking yourself questions like: 125 00:09:49,470 --> 00:09:53,829 What are the top 3 most important things in my life? 126 00:09:53,829 --> 00:09:56,910 What is the most important thing I can do right now? 127 00:09:56,910 --> 00:10:00,110 Am I keeping things simple right now? 128 00:10:00,110 --> 00:10:05,180 When you follow the answers you get from these questions and take necessary courses of action, 129 00:10:05,180 --> 00:10:11,620 you will start to work on what is truly important and, by concentrating on what is important, 130 00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:15,610 you will live both a simpler and happier life. 131 00:10:15,610 --> 00:10:17,300 4. 132 00:10:17,300 --> 00:10:23,569 Go slow if need be In the words of Confucius “It does not matter 133 00:10:23,569 --> 00:10:31,199 how slowly you go as long as you do not stop” Confucius teaches us that success is a work 134 00:10:31,199 --> 00:10:36,470 in progress and it doesn’t matter if you are moving a step closer or an inch closer 135 00:10:36,470 --> 00:10:43,560 to your dreams - the most important thing is that you keep moving forward. 136 00:10:43,560 --> 00:10:48,399 Most of the time failure occurs because of our high expectations. 137 00:10:48,399 --> 00:10:54,080 Our society makes us believe that there is a specific age where we must graduate, get 138 00:10:54,080 --> 00:11:00,410 married, earn money and settle down and so we set unrealistic goals and set a time limit 139 00:11:00,410 --> 00:11:04,220 but do not give the kind of effort it actually deserves. 140 00:11:04,220 --> 00:11:10,050 The problem is that we are so focused on the reward, on the end result, that we forget 141 00:11:10,050 --> 00:11:16,390 to concentrate on the driving forces of success such as attaining knowledge or mastering our 142 00:11:16,390 --> 00:11:22,509 skills and because of this when we hit the first road block we assume failure and give 143 00:11:22,509 --> 00:11:24,850 up entirely. 144 00:11:24,850 --> 00:11:31,541 According to Confucius, giving up or changing our goals is not a wise act; instead, you 145 00:11:31,541 --> 00:11:36,970 should make changes in your plans and actions in order to achieve your goal, if the previous 146 00:11:36,970 --> 00:11:39,190 plan did not work. 147 00:11:39,190 --> 00:11:42,970 The truth is there is no such age for settling down. 148 00:11:42,970 --> 00:11:48,069 It just might not happen in the time frame that you had expected but you will surely 149 00:11:48,069 --> 00:11:53,149 reach where you want to go if you put in the daily required effort and keep on developing 150 00:11:53,149 --> 00:11:55,350 your skills. 151 00:11:55,350 --> 00:12:01,190 You are a unique person with your own gifts and talents and no one will invest in them 152 00:12:01,190 --> 00:12:02,460 more than you. 153 00:12:02,460 --> 00:12:08,100 Hence, giving up on your important goals means that you are giving up on yourself, on your 154 00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:14,200 happiness and soon you will establish a pattern of giving up on anything when things don’t 155 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,399 go the way you hoped. 156 00:12:16,399 --> 00:12:22,579 To remain motivated and consistent is the key to achieving any goal and being happy. 157 00:12:22,579 --> 00:12:28,459 If you find a mountain in the middle of your path, go over it slowly and steadily. 158 00:12:28,459 --> 00:12:33,690 If there is a river ahead, build a bridge over, or swim across it. 159 00:12:33,690 --> 00:12:38,890 In short, if you find hurdles in the path of your journey, you should always think of 160 00:12:38,890 --> 00:12:44,089 a way to overcome them and keep on moving towards your goal because success does not 161 00:12:44,089 --> 00:12:49,170 rely upon the number of times you failed, but it absolutely depends upon the number 162 00:12:49,170 --> 00:12:53,959 of times you bounced back after having failed. 163 00:12:53,959 --> 00:12:55,899 5. 164 00:12:55,899 --> 00:13:01,970 Learn by your experience According to Confucius “By three methods 165 00:13:01,970 --> 00:13:08,930 we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which 166 00:13:08,930 --> 00:13:16,459 is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest." 167 00:13:16,459 --> 00:13:21,391 According to some studies, if we stop learning and become satisfied with what we know, we 168 00:13:21,391 --> 00:13:26,620 do a huge disservice to our brain as learning keeps our brain healthy and makes us live 169 00:13:26,620 --> 00:13:27,820 longer. 170 00:13:27,820 --> 00:13:33,110 There are several books and studies linking a healthy brain to a happy life. 171 00:13:33,110 --> 00:13:39,389 Also, some researchers concluded that there is one fundamental thing people should do 172 00:13:39,389 --> 00:13:45,550 in order to be happy: to be engaged in difficult, but doable actions. 173 00:13:45,550 --> 00:13:52,110 In other words, to keep on learning, developing ourselves, pushing our limits. 174 00:13:52,110 --> 00:13:59,860 Confucius considered three methods of acquiring wisdom: by reflection, by imitation and by 175 00:13:59,860 --> 00:14:01,000 experience. 176 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:07,360 The first method is the noblest one, Reflection is about you becoming aware of your own thinking 177 00:14:07,360 --> 00:14:08,760 processes. 178 00:14:08,760 --> 00:14:14,790 It enables assessment of the "why" and "how" of learning, and what needs to be done as 179 00:14:14,790 --> 00:14:16,170 a result. 180 00:14:16,170 --> 00:14:22,730 The second method is to learn by imitation, the easiest type, it is the method used by 181 00:14:22,730 --> 00:14:28,389 children and teenagers to learn from adults, it is the method used by the trainee in a 182 00:14:28,389 --> 00:14:31,120 company to learn a new skill. 183 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:36,009 It may be an easy method, but it is just as important as the other two. 184 00:14:36,009 --> 00:14:42,800 The third method is to learn by experience, Confucius considers it to be the bitterest 185 00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:43,800 method. 186 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:49,189 To understand the actual meaning of anything, you have to experience it yourself. 187 00:14:49,189 --> 00:14:54,640 Maybe the thing which is considered bad by you turns out to be good and vice versa. 188 00:14:54,640 --> 00:15:00,889 It is very easy to spread negativity by saying harsh things about someone or something you 189 00:15:00,889 --> 00:15:02,699 don’t actually know. 190 00:15:02,699 --> 00:15:07,750 So you should first experience it for yourself and then talk about it. 191 00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:13,149 For example, if you heard negative things about a person said by someone else, before 192 00:15:13,149 --> 00:15:18,000 judging them, you should meet them in person to form your own opinion of them. 193 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:23,600 Because this method can imply a series of unpleasant experiences, Confucius calls it 194 00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:26,490 “the bitterest” method. 195 00:15:26,490 --> 00:15:31,129 However, experience can be the most trusted way to acquire wisdom. 196 00:15:31,129 --> 00:15:36,810 Sometimes, our judgement can be flawed if we only reflect on the issue at hand or, if 197 00:15:36,810 --> 00:15:42,290 we just imitate somebody, we might also imitate the wrong way to approach a problem. 198 00:15:42,290 --> 00:15:47,589 Therefore, just reflecting and imitating someone simply isn’t enough. 199 00:15:47,589 --> 00:15:54,769 The best option is to use all three methods, according to the specific circumstances. 200 00:15:54,769 --> 00:15:59,100 Keeping our brain healthy will lead us to have more wisdom and live a much happier and 201 00:15:59,100 --> 00:16:01,759 longer life. 202 00:16:01,759 --> 00:16:03,569 6. 203 00:16:03,569 --> 00:16:07,370 Meditate In our final quote from Confucius for this 204 00:16:07,370 --> 00:16:13,550 video, we learn “The more man meditates among good thoughts, the better will be his 205 00:16:13,550 --> 00:16:16,749 world and the world at large”. 206 00:16:16,749 --> 00:16:22,300 For Confucius, cultivating good thoughts has enormous importance. 207 00:16:22,300 --> 00:16:28,569 Practicing good thoughts might not come automatically, but it can become a ritual. 208 00:16:28,569 --> 00:16:34,740 By practising good thoughts, we can practically learn how to be kind and mindful. 209 00:16:34,740 --> 00:16:39,500 According to Confucius, we can learn to let our behaviour lead our feelings. 210 00:16:39,500 --> 00:16:46,200 Oftentimes, in this high-speed era, our minds can run wild, our feelings can be completely 211 00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:47,740 overwhelming. 212 00:16:47,740 --> 00:16:53,740 Today more than ever it is critical for us all to learn to control our behaviour, to 213 00:16:53,740 --> 00:16:56,600 learn to cultivate good thoughts. 214 00:16:56,600 --> 00:17:02,170 And this is where meditation can help tremendously. 215 00:17:02,170 --> 00:17:08,390 Meditation is essential for us to create peace within ourselves and to avoid negative thoughts. 216 00:17:08,390 --> 00:17:14,390 We need to understand that difficulties in life come and go and meditation helps us to 217 00:17:14,390 --> 00:17:21,189 stay focused and to be calm so that we don’t deviate from the path we are walking. 218 00:17:21,189 --> 00:17:26,339 Meditation helps us develop positivity in ourselves, in order to overcome the obstacles 219 00:17:26,339 --> 00:17:28,400 we are facing in our lives. 220 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:33,840 When you look at things in an optimistic way, you automatically become enthusiastic and 221 00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:36,080 full of positive energy. 222 00:17:36,080 --> 00:17:41,539 There are many types of meditation, but, for starters, you can practice focusing on your 223 00:17:41,539 --> 00:17:46,870 breathing, sitting down in a quiet room, making sure you will not be interrupted for about 224 00:17:46,870 --> 00:17:49,640 5 to 10 minutes every day. 225 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:55,160 When you meditate, you overcome the negativity happening in your life and see the world with 226 00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:58,110 eyes full of hope and happiness. 227 00:17:58,110 --> 00:18:04,330 You look at people around you with positivity and you generate a healthy vibe in the environment. 228 00:18:04,330 --> 00:18:10,640 You will meet new people, build new relationships, help each other and spread positivity and 229 00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:16,600 finally attain peace of mind and a heart full of happiness. 230 00:18:16,600 --> 00:18:20,760 As we said at the beginning, this video is sponsored by Babbel. 231 00:18:20,760 --> 00:18:25,920 Last year was a long ride for most of us and everyone is looking for a fresh start in this 232 00:18:25,920 --> 00:18:30,160 year thinking about what we want to achieve in 2021. 233 00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:36,350 It's a great moment to set up new goals towards being our best selves in 2021 such as learning 234 00:18:36,350 --> 00:18:39,929 a new language, and Babbel is the perfect app for it. 235 00:18:39,929 --> 00:18:45,370 As I am sure you have guessed by now I love learning about philosophies and exploring 236 00:18:45,370 --> 00:18:48,409 new places to get immersed in their rich culture. 237 00:18:48,409 --> 00:18:53,080 Therefore it’s always helpful for me to have a reliable app to learn new languages 238 00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:54,380 quickly. 239 00:18:54,380 --> 00:18:59,150 Babbel is a subscription based language learning app which I use so that I can confidently 240 00:18:59,150 --> 00:19:04,930 start new conversations and make meaningful human connections in foreign countries. 241 00:19:04,930 --> 00:19:10,070 Babbel offers 14 different languages with professional bite-sized courses that take 242 00:19:10,070 --> 00:19:15,270 your native language 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