Speaker 1: Welcome to But I'm a Lesbian, the podcast where we

serve all batty SaaS, queer, film reviews, and everything in between.

Speaker 2: Whether you were a baby, gay.

Speaker 3: Or queer elder. We're here, we're queer, and we're diving

deep into all things lesbian.

Speaker 2: We're your hosts, Caitlin and Angelina.

Speaker 3: Get ready for some sapphag serotonin. So today's episode, I

think is a fun one. But I think the last

three were also fun because we had guests and they

were like they were scary, but they weren't like too scary.

Speaker 1: Yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah, it was like spooky just a lot.

Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, season, but not like it's truly terrifying.

Speaker 2: Yeah, so.

Speaker 3: This is a fun one. Also about high schoolers. There's

a lot of movies. I don't notice that, but I

don't know people really romanticize high school.

Speaker 1: They do, it's hard to find, like especially I feel

like gay movies sometimes there are a lot now, but yeah.

Speaker 2: The majority of them are like high school.

Speaker 3: I know.

Speaker 2: It's so interesting.

Speaker 3: Yeah, I remember being like a little kid and like

I couldn't wait to be in high school because all

the movies are high school. Yeah, like clueless, you know,

like I'm like, they're so cool and pretty like my

knees watching Mean Girls and then making a bird book

at school in like third grade, like, oh my god,

but so young to be watching that because she did

not understand that you're not supposed to be like the

mean girl.

Speaker 2: She was like, but they're pretty. I want to be

like them. She's like, why wouldn't I want?

Speaker 1: So?

Speaker 3: Anyway, this one today's episode, we are talking about bottoms.

So this is from twenty twenty three. Again, like I said,

they're in high school. Yeah, I don't know how old

everyone is, but I it's another one of those movies

where everybody is like mid twenties and up playing high schoolers.

Speaker 1: You don't know how I want to say they're seniors, right,

because they're talking about real life.

Speaker 2: Oh, in real life, I think they are seniors. It's

giving very much.

Speaker 3: Well we'll talk about it a little more, but it's

giving super Bad, which is one of my favorite movies

of all time. So it's like super Bad but girls,

and the girls happened to be lesbians. So I will

tell you I really like this movie. If you couldn't

tell that I was gonna like it, I really like it.

But yeah, I was just saying, like in real life

because I feel like Rachel Senate. I don't know if

it's not or Senate.

Speaker 2: I think it's Rachel. I just say it fastened Senate.

I want to like the Senate. Maybe Congress. Yes, she's

in Congress. Yeah, right now, so they are they are

in their mid twenties. Yeah.

Speaker 3: I know this was like a few years ago, but

I feel like she was like almost like twenty Yeah,

I think so. Anyway, point being, the movie is about

a high school fight club. Yeah, of girls, have you

ever been in a physical fight?

Speaker 1: I was gonna say, yes, I have been in one,

but I was gonna lie and tricky right.

Speaker 2: Never as an adult, No, I was like a kid.

Speaker 3: Yeah, like a baby kid, Like I want to say,

first yeah, I remember my first memory.

Speaker 2: Is of that.

Speaker 1: No, it was like first second grade. But it wasn't

like we like beat each other to a pulp. It

was just like pushing to the ground and like pulling

hair and stuff. I mean, you know, like the normal stuff.

But as an adult, oh, I do I remember?

Speaker 2: Yes?

Speaker 1: Because she stole Yeah, because she stole my necklace. You guys,

are the necklaces that you didn't have to like put on.

You could just like push to your neck my sister,

you know, like a choke, like a choker, but like

not like around like.

Speaker 2: They're open on the back a little bit.

Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, it was picture day and my sister

let me wear her blouse and that necklace, and she

was like, don't lose this necklace, like don't don't fuck

it up basically, and I was like, yeah, I'd never

do anything crazy anyways, and that one time, like we

were all waiting and I never had a problem with her,

but she was like, I like your necklace and I

was like, oh my god, thinks.

Speaker 2: But then she was like can I try it on?

Speaker 1: And I was like, actually no, because it's not mine,

it's my sister's. And she would not take no for

an answer, so she snatched it off of my neck

and I was like, oh my god, this fucking little bitch.

Speaker 2: So I went to get it out of her.

Speaker 1: Yeah, I went to get it, and I was like,

oh my god, Like is there not a teacher around.

Speaker 2: I was like, did they just do that? I know,

not that I would, okay.

Speaker 1: I feel like in school, I was very shy and

like I kept myself, but I would do some like

devious things, and the teachers would never believe that I

would do that because they were like, no, she's so quiet,

and I was like.

Speaker 2: Yeah, I never did that. Yeah.

Speaker 1: I was like I never did that, and they're like,

but she did, and I was like no, but I

feel really bad because I did do it.

Speaker 2: Yeah, I was, so they would never believe.

Speaker 1: Anyways, I grabbed it from her and I pushed her

and she got up and she was trying to like

get it, and I used to have really long hair,

so she pulled my hair. So I went and I

pulled her hair. But it was so stupid because we

were just standing there like taking turn because I was

like and then like I stopped, like what are you

gonna do? And she's like pull your hair yeah, and

I was like, oh my god, this is.

Speaker 2: Not gonna end.

Speaker 1: But anyways, I think after I pulled her hair, we

were like, Okay, the line's moving, let's just keep walking.

Speaker 2: And I was so annoyed and I was like, if she.

Speaker 1: Tells on me, I'm going to say like, yeah, she

took my necklace, but she never did.

Speaker 2: It was one of those times well she kind of knew,

she knew that she was in the wrong. I don't understand.

Speaker 1: I told her, like it's my older sisters, like, no,

I don't want to give it to you.

Speaker 2: She was just like I don't care give me the necklace.

Speaker 1: And I was like, you're a spoiled little brat, Like

what anyways, Yeah, that's all I know. And I told

my sister and I was like, sorry, it is a

little like kind of bent. But she was like, I

mean that's okay. It wasn't your fall.

Speaker 3: She's like the thing, you stuck up for it because

I know if you just let that girl take it,

I know.

Speaker 1: I just ever see the necklace and it's actually in

one of my school pictures and I was just like.

Speaker 2: Wait, you do you have the picture? I do have it.

We're gonna post it on Instagram, just no context, just

a picture of me.

Speaker 3: Yeah, pretty much, but no caption, like if you know,

you know, yeah, okay, if.

Speaker 2: You're listening, you're gonna see you're gonna know, yeah, random post.

Have you ever been Yeah, but only once I did.

Speaker 3: When you're talking about like elementary school, there was a

time in elementary school where there was a there was

like we were all walking around touching a tree, like

we were like, okay.

Speaker 2: You all had to have your hand on the tree.

Speaker 3: I think it was like the teacher's way of keeping

making sure everybody wasn't running around on the field, Like

you had to keep your hand on the tree. We

were in like kindergarten, maybe first grade. We were all

walking around the tree like with our hand on it.

And then this one boy, Josh cut me, and like

not physically cut me, but like he cut me in line,

and I was.

Speaker 2: Like, no cutting, and I pushed it, and it was similar.

They didn't nobody believed that.

Speaker 3: I didn't because I was like so quiet and sweet

and he was kind of a bad but he bothered me.

But I got into like a kind of like a

real fight when I was in high school. I don't

know if I I guess I didn't tell you the story.

Speaker 2: I was saving it for this episode.

Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, I was telling someone this story the other

day and I was I'm kind of embarrassed about it

because I was really bad.

Speaker 2: Me and my girl. I was a bitch. Oh my god. Yeah.

Speaker 3: So I was in high school. I had these two

best friends. But the problem with being three best friends

is someone's always left out. Like it was either like

me and Lindsay were friends and we were talking shit

on Amanda, or me and Amanda were friends. We were

talking shit on Lindsay or those two were friends and

they were talking shit on me. So it was a

time when they were friends and I was like not

in the group. I don't remember why. I probably did

something wrong because I was a drunk sweat in high school,

so I probably made like some some bad decision.

Speaker 2: Anyway, I was walking.

Speaker 3: I was walking by with like my group of other

friends and like we were all drinking or whatever.

Speaker 2: This was not at school.

Speaker 3: This was like at this concert venue that everybody would

go to, and I was walking by with this boy

that like I really liked you really like.

Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think part of why I liked him was.

Speaker 3: Well because he was like a scene boy, and I

feel like scene boys kind of look like girls because

they always have fancy hair, and they wore girl pants

because it was before you could get skinny jeans for men,

so they had to buy girl jeans. But also his

name on MySpace was mic Asexual, so I was like, Oh,

he's never going to try to have sex with me.

Speaker 2: You're like perfect, like yes.

Speaker 3: So anyway, I was walking by and he had his

arm around me, and I thought I was so cool,

and because he was like a year or too older too,

so it was like, ooh, so cool. And I said

something really mean to them. One of them was bigger

and one of them was tall and skinny, and I

was like, this is so mean. I was like, oh,

look a giraffe and an elephant.

Speaker 2: Ha ha ha. I thought it was so funny.

Speaker 3: And then like I kept walking with my friends and

then they came up from behind me and like hit

me over the head with their purse, and my one friend,

Amanda dumped her doctor pepper all over me, and they

were pulling my hair and like hitting me in the head,

and I didn't know what to do because I'd ever

been a fight, so I just remember being like fuck

you cut and pulling their.

Speaker 2: Hair, and they pulled out my nosy and spit on me.

Speaker 3: And then instead of anyone helping me, no one helped me.

And then Mike Asexual was like, oh shit, you just got.

Speaker 2: Your ass beat. Okay, Fuck Mike Asexual. I know when

you're watching the start there, Mike fuck.

Speaker 3: I have tried to look him up, but I don't

know his last name. I only know my second So

I don't know. I don't know if he really is

a sexual and he, like it, still is living this life.

Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know. I want to know

if he's still seen.

Speaker 1: Yeah. Really, do you remember the time that you were

there and you didn't even help me?

Speaker 2: Yeah?

Speaker 3: But anyway, then like a few weeks after that, we

ended up being friends again. But oh, those same girls

that were my friends during this era where we hated

each other, they started a MySpace group and it was

called I Hate Caitlyn Corruption because that was oh my.

Speaker 2: God, and you know, they were in it.

Speaker 3: And then the boy that was my first kiss that

I was mad at them for letting him do stuff

to me because I was drunk.

Speaker 2: He was in it and he talked about.

Speaker 3: How it was a bad kisser, and I'm like, really, now,

as an adult, my mind is like, you were telling

on yourself because you like assaulted a drunk girl.

Speaker 2: I didn't even know what I was doing. Yeah, and yeah,

fuck that guy.

Speaker 3: His name is Aaron, but everyone called him Turtle because

he looked like a turtle. AnyWho, So I really want

to tell you I trauma dump on everyone.

Speaker 2: It's funny it's funny. I swear, You're like, no, it is,

but that goods funny. Oh my god, I started it.

Speaker 3: I was a bitch and they were right to attack

me because my body shamed them. That was rude and

that was me projecting my own issues.

Speaker 2: AnyWho, I don't feel like that was so excessive.

Speaker 1: They poled your nose ring and they dumped doctor Pepper

and they were hitting you on the head.

Speaker 3: And this was before the whole like Pumpkin and New York,

like I this was before that, Like I mean, I

don't know, it's always been fucked up to spit on someone,

but it was like before it was like a big

thing on TV. AnyWho, moving on, So, do you have

a hot take or a burning desire about this movie?

Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, I do.

Speaker 1: Okay, so my burning desire I think I wanted in

the beginning. Of course, we know Pj's like literally obsessed

with like wanting to have sex, Like She's like, I'm

gonna have sex with whoever, Like I don't care. I

kind of did like her and Hazel together, Like I

wish that they were like they saw that sooner, you know,

because she was so like, oh no, like I'm not

gonna go for Hazel because most of the time she

was like, Hazel's pissing me off.

Speaker 2: But yeah, but Hazel was hot. I was like, yeah,

maybe because she's weird. Yeah, like hot weird girl.

Speaker 1: Yeah, and she needs to realize that she's also a

weird girl too, and so I think maybe if they focused.

Speaker 2: On that in the beginning, you know, but yeah, that's

I know. I kind of felt that.

Speaker 3: I think the first time, the first time I watched it,

I didn't like it as much as this time. And

I think it was because I took it too seriously

that I have and people know if they follow us

on TikTok, because I'm like, I don't care that Driveaway

Dolls was supposed to be campy. I'm mad about all

the pieces, but this was different in that, like, yeah,

the second time I watched it, this time I was like, wait,

I love this. It's so camp And they did do

the campiness right and the silliness right. When I was

first watching it, I was really mad because I was

taking it too serious and I was like, oh my god,

like that Cindy Crawford's daughter is way out of pj's league,

Like she really thinks she's gonna get with that straight girl,

like yeah, and she's like being a hater when they

walk in and they're like all these girls are ugly,

they're like two.

Speaker 2: Yes.

Speaker 3: But then the more I thought about it, I was like, oh,

I feel like they're it's like super bad, right, Like

were those guys super hot? No, but like they acted

like they could get the hottest girl. So it was

like the same type of vibe. But yeah, so it

was funny. I guess that was kind of my my

burning desire.

Speaker 2: I don't think it's really a hot take.

Speaker 3: Maybe, but I said, I thought that I would hate

this movie, but I actually love it. It's camp and it's silly,

but it also talks about girl power and the importance

of queer friendship.

Speaker 2: Yeah, and it reminds me of Debs, and I love Debs.

Speaker 3: It's like Debs, but more violent and more like sexual

yeah twenty years later.

Speaker 2: Yeah, and no one's like a spy. But yeah, yeah,

so I really liked it.

Speaker 3: So right now, we're going to take a quick break

yet and when we get back we'll get into the recap.

Speaker 2: So practice some high kicks until we get back. Welcome

back to but I'm a lesbian.

Speaker 3: This week we are discussing bottoms, the movie, not the

I don't know is that a position the type of.

Speaker 2: Woman anyway, a movie bottoms?

Speaker 3: So uh, this is like the opening.

Speaker 2: I know, I never know how to start it. I

know I always do like the film starts with movie started.

Speaker 3: I did say, like we open on no like, I

still felt like we needed like those.

Speaker 1: Like Okay, I have to you know, the lion roar

that they do in the movies.

Speaker 2: Only we had had Snape do that when he was here.

Speaker 1: Maybe we can have juny JUNI can fill in, you

can do She'll do just a little hiss she loves yeah.

Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, So anyway, we open on PJ.

Speaker 3: This is Rachel Sennet's character and she's talking to Josie,

who is Oh my god, I didn't write down her name,

but she's so funny.

Speaker 2: Do you know what her name is? Ao? Ao? What's

your last name? Dear be? I think I'm saying her

last name right, Okay, Well, she's so fun and I

love her. There is this.

Speaker 3: One there's the funniest snl' skit. She was in it,

and oh my god, if you haven't seen you have

to see it.

Speaker 2: It's like, I don't remember.

Speaker 3: I think it was like because she was like the

special guest and she was like in a classroom and

it was supposed to be like a middle school classroom,

and I think she was playing a boy. And then

like Keenan comes in and he's playing like a magician,

and she's like, don't I don't give you permission to

do magic on me, Warlock, and he's like, okay, I.

Speaker 2: Won't use you.

Speaker 3: And then she's like, oh, like acting like she's been possessed,

and then she's like singing and then she says like

I'm bisexual, and then she's like she's like he bewitched

me and made me say like that I'm bisexual anyway,

and then the principal is like, why are you believing

that bisexual boy?

Speaker 2: Oh? Okay, why do I feel like that? I'm never funny?

I don't know. Insert clip, Yes, this is another day

for real. It's literally so funny.

Speaker 3: But that's what I think of when I think of her,

because it's my favorite anyway. So it opens to PJ

talking to Josie about wanting to finally have sex now

that it's their last year of school, and it makes

me think of Super Bad, which I love because it

was the same vibe. They wanted to have sex before

school ended because they were like, we can't go.

Speaker 2: To college and have never had sex, like, oh my god.

Speaker 3: And so they are talking about their crushes and like

that they should try to talk to them, and PJ

likes Brittany and Josie likes Isabelle, but she's like, Isabelle

has a boyfriend, and so I think we're like, oh,

is Isabelle straight? Well whatever, she definitely has a partner,

so you shouldn't be trying to hit her, even though it.

Speaker 2: Is a man.

Speaker 3: So they go to this school like fair thingy, which

is really cool.

Speaker 2: Did your school have a fair? No? Me either? And

they do it in Greece.

Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know, maybe like it's yeah, it has

to be a rich school thing.

Speaker 2: They would not have a here.

Speaker 1: We have the fair like near it, like the Actual Affair.

Speaker 3: It's like school because like I think there's other movies

where they do this besides Greece. Greece, it's like the

teachers are like you can throw a pie in their face.

Speaker 2: It was that type of thing. It was to raise

money like a fundraiser. Yeah, no, we never your school

didn't either.

Speaker 3: Well, I went to seven high schools, but I don't

think any of it, neither of them did.

Speaker 2: I don't think any of them that affair.

Speaker 3: But it was also interesting because the majority of the

schools I went to were in Pedaluma, and there's a

fair in Pedaloma. The Sonoma County Fair is in Pedaloma,

so similar to where yours, where it's like, well there.

Speaker 2: Was a fair near there, so why would they why

would they do it?

Speaker 3: Take school fair anyway? So they go to this school

fair thingy. I was like, PJ is very outgoing and forward.

Just want you guys to understand. She's very like, you

got to talk to that girl. I'm gonna talk to mine.

Speaker 2: Yeah, blah blah blah.

Speaker 3: Jo Cie sees Isabelle and then Hazel gets in the way.

Hazel is another character who is played by Ruby Cruz,

and she loves to play a lesbian. And I think

she might be by but or she I don't know.

She has a boyfriend. I think she's really good looking.

She is, I didn't know, you know how men are

like what a waste when women are lesbian?

Speaker 2: That's what I think. And then I'm like, wait, should we.

Speaker 3: JK you guys, JK, not really but yes, not to

be a man hater, but just kidding, just kidding. I

don't care about being a man haater. So anyway, So

they don't seem to like Hazel, and I don't really

get why, even though I'm a vegan and she talks

about working out a meat thing, so that's why I

wouldn't like her.

Speaker 2: But that's not why they didn't like her. They just

think she's weird.

Speaker 3: Yeah, and PJ jokingly tell Hazel that they were in

Juvie all summer, but Hazel doesn't get sarcasm is something

we find out as the movie goes on, so she

totally believes they were like whoa, yeah, that's crazy. And

then we see Jeff, who is a popular football guy

and he's Isabelle's boyfriend. And whenever someone is named Jeff,

I just think of twenty one Jump Street.

Speaker 2: All right, Yeah, he's like my name and Jim's so

I good think of so stupid anyway.

Speaker 3: Okay, So Brittany is played by Kaya Gerber and she's

so beautiful, and it just goes to back my theory

that I don't think i've ever talked about on here,

but I think that like dark hair, dark eyes is

the most beautiful, and it gets like, I don't know,

people always want to talk about like blonde hair, blue eyes,

but like Kaya Gerber is fucking beautiful. She's just like

her mom, who had also fucking beautiful Cindy Crawford, and

they both are like a brunette, brown eyes, gorgeousness. And

then I think of like Salma Hayek, who is like

one of the most beautiful women in the world. I

think she's kind of like not a good person or something.

I don't know if she's so beautiful anyway.

Speaker 1: Oh yeah, weird dan of her. But then it's like

her husband and they're like company and stuff, and I

don't know, I don't know.

Speaker 2: She's just really beautiful. That's why I know.

Speaker 3: So that's what I was thinking about when they showed Kiagerer,

because I'm like, oh my god, she's so pretty. And

PJ tries to set Isabelle up to talk to talk

to her, talk.

Speaker 2: To Isabelle, oh, to try to have Josie.

Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, And then I was like, PJ accidentally, oh no,

Josie accidentally body shames Isabelle by trying to flatter her

because this is so weird.

Speaker 2: But like, so.

Speaker 3: Obviously Brittany is skinny, and I feel like everyone in

this is skinny, but whatever, she's like a different level

of skinny. And the way that PJ tries to hit

on her is by being like, damn, girl, you're so skinny,

Like you need to eat a burger or something because

you're so skinny.

Speaker 2: Like she's like, yeah, she's talking about like her wrists.

She's like, do you want a hot dog with the bun?

Speaker 3: And she's like, no, no bun And she's like, girl,

you could eat the bun.

Speaker 2: Like it's so weird.

Speaker 3: And so then Josie tries to do the same thing

with Isabelle, but she says something weird like are you sick?

I don't remember what she said, but she gets so far.

Speaker 1: Yeah, it was like you can eat that food and

like regurgitate.

Speaker 2: It and still late. Yeah, so weird, Like oh no,

fuck is your brother? Yeah, So it's very awkward.

Speaker 3: And so after the fair, PJ and Josie are like

sad because they didn't succeed with the girls, and Josie

is spiraling about never having sex with a girl and

ending up with a gay husband.

Speaker 2: She goes like she has an anxiety just orderr I feel.

Speaker 3: She's just like, whoa, then this is gonna happen and

blah blah blah blah.

Speaker 2: She's like, I'm just gonna be in this like.

Speaker 3: Weird marriage man who's okay?

Speaker 2: And do da da and so then.

Speaker 3: Because they're sitting in their car in the parking lot,

they see Isabelle and Jeff fighting in the parking lot

and Pj's like, you gotta invite her in the car.

So Josie and PJ invite her into the car to

like rescue her and give her ride home, and Josie

very lightly hits Jeff's knee with the car because he's

like I'm not moving, No, I'm gonna stand in front

of a car like he's being stupid. So she like

she like starts to go and she very lightly taps him,

and then he's like and then all of his like

friends come and help him, and he's like crying and

being dramatic. Yeah, and then Isabelle ends up getting out

and storming off.

Speaker 2: So I'm like, she didn't even go.

Speaker 1: She's like, yeah, I know, she was just like this

is too much and then they were like, Okay, I

guess we should leave.

Speaker 2: Yeah.

Speaker 3: So then at school the next day, PJ and Josie

walk up to their lockers and they see that someone

has written fagot number one and faggot number two on

their lockers.

Speaker 2: So I'm like, oh, people are still homophobic in this school.

But also I.

Speaker 3: Don't feel like we've talked about the L word in

the last few episodes, but it reminds.

Speaker 2: Me, actually we haven't, are you? Are we doing? Okay?

What going on?

Speaker 3: It reminds me of the episode of The L Word where,

when I think it's season two, Jenny had just like

she had gone to the mental institution, So.

Speaker 2: Maybe it's season three, because I feel like season two,

season three she goes.

Speaker 3: Okay, so she's with Max, and then Max is going

to move to LA with her. So they're driving back

and they stop at this weird, like hicktown like thing

and the guys call them faggots.

Speaker 2: Yeah, and then Jenny goes, We're not faggots, We're dykes,

and I love it.

Speaker 3: So That's what I made me think of about how

they had this written on their locker.

Speaker 2: You're like so encouraged.

Speaker 3: I know, you're like, hmm, whatever, and it also makes

me stupid, you know.

Speaker 2: And like the probably the first episode of the word when.

Speaker 3: Oh my god, it might be later on, but they're

talking But and Tina are talking about like if they

should hyphenate the last names or like make a new

last name for a baby, and they're like, it's last name.

Speaker 2: Could be poor Tard.

Speaker 3: And then Tina is like, oh, they're gonna be like, hey,

poor Tard, how's your two moms?

Speaker 2: You big game O.

Speaker 3: But it's like game on one ye anyway, so they

are like, oh no, not again. So apparently this has

happened before. People have written the things on their thing

their locker. In class, everyone's talking about them hitting Jeff

and they you know how rumors are.

Speaker 2: It's like very dramatic.

Speaker 3: Yeah, and Hazel's like, well, yeah, they went to JUV

like they're wild, and so then everybody believes that they

went to Jean. They get an announcement of propaganda against

the rival school. It's like they're gonna they're gonna like

attack you on your way to your car, like blah

blah blah.

Speaker 1: Yeah, because they had that person that got hit in

the face by the Huntington players.

Speaker 3: I know, but I felt like that wasn't real. But

then it gets really violent towards the end, so maybe

it was real.

Speaker 1: I feel like it was because they pointed to the

girl in the class where they're like, I'm so sorry

you got hit on your birthday in the face.

Speaker 2: And she's just like I bounce.

Speaker 3: I know, okay, so maybe it was real anyway. They

then Isabelle talks to Josie AND's like, hey, I heard

you beat up my boyfriend last night, and she's like

you were literally.

Speaker 2: There's like she's like oh whatever.

Speaker 3: And then they get called into the principal's office and

I think this is the part where they're like, can

the ugly gay losers come to the office.

Speaker 2: Yeah, sid They're like, oh, it's you guys, and so

they go to the principal.

Speaker 3: The principal is mad at them for hurting Jeff because

he loves Jeff's like, a, it's creepy, and he threatens

to expel him, and Josie's like, no, no, no, this

was all a misunderstanding.

Speaker 2: We were practicing for our self defense club.

Speaker 3: And he's like oh okay, and so then they're like

they they basically are talking later at the bleachers about

like actually starting a self defense club, which I feel

like they have to do because they said they have one.

Speaker 2: They have to.

Speaker 3: But I think Josie's like, no, I don't want to

really do it, and Pj's like, no, let's do it,

and Josie's like, but we don't know how to fight.

This makes me think of when I got attacked and

I didn't know what to do, so I pulled their

hair and called.

Speaker 2: Them cuts, like how are you? I don't know how

to fight either, and he needed this club. It's twenty

years too late.

Speaker 3: So Hazel is like, I know taekwondo, and I can

bring Stella Rebecca. And they're like Stella Rebecca who's a

car model on the weekend. So she's like a cool,

hot cheerleader girl and she's also like a model. Yeah,

and so now they're going to definitely start it because

she can get hot girl to yeah, and so she's

PJ is also like, you can probably get with Isabella

if you do this, Like she's gonna be like, you're

so cool, and so they decide to do it. They

show up to the first meeting. This is when PJ

is like, oh, all these girls are ugly, and I

was like, She's like, they're all too Yeah, she's so rude,

and I was like, I'm annoyed by that, but I

guess they're showing how shallow high schoolers are.

Speaker 2: I mean, if you think about it, we yeah, we

talked about I was very mean and I don't even

know how that's the same person. And so PJ.

Speaker 3: That's the funniest part. I think that the whole movie.

PJ comes in and she's like, welcome to our fight club,

and she's like super like crazy, like I'm gonna fuck

you up, like I don't know. She's like really over

the top, and it's so funny. And then Josie's like,

maybe we should like stretch.

Speaker 2: She's like, let's do some trust.

Speaker 3: Fall and so uh, PJ doubles down on the Juvi

LII and gets your you to go along with her.

But then Josie is it too far and said she

beat a girl to dead, and.

Speaker 2: They're like, what, you killed a girl. She's like no,

well yeah, But then the ambulance came and they brought

her back to lot.

Speaker 1: They resuscitated her, and then we had like a really

good conversation afterwards.

Speaker 2: Too much this girl. Okay.

Speaker 3: So then for a for a demo, Josie punches PJ

in the face and uh, then they're like, wait, we

need a teacher to be an advisor for the club,

and so, uh they try to get an advisor. They

get this guy, mister g who.

Speaker 2: Is he like a coach or something. Also he doesn't

know anything.

Speaker 1: He's also he I feel like they say, yeah, he

said he has like a lot of other stuff going on, okay, because.

Speaker 2: He's how is he a teacher? He seems like what

what is what is the stuff on a white board?

Speaker 3: Yeah? It was like so incorrect, yes, so, but it

also made me think of like me girls, like how

the coach was the second he's like you're gonna get

chlamydia and die? Yeah, he was giving Okay, So they're like,

we got to get this guy, probably because they're like

he is like he doesn't ever know what's going on.

Speaker 2: He'll do it.

Speaker 3: And so they tell him it's a feminist club and

they're like, you know you should like do this, but

like don't.

Speaker 2: Ever show up to them club a hobby better?

Speaker 3: Yeah, he's like They're like that's better allyship than like

actually shut up.

Speaker 2: So anyway, he's like, okay, I guess, and so.

Speaker 3: Josie gives a pep talk about how they can save

each other from the other high schoolers the Huntington High School,

and then there's like a montage of like the club

fighting over the next few days or weeks, I don't

know how long it's been, and now people are noticing

them and paying attention. And then Hazel tells PJ and

Josie they should get to know the girls better instead

of just fighting. And one of the football I don't

remember what his name.

Speaker 2: Is, Oh, Tim, the best friend. Tim. He's obsessed with you.

Speaker 3: He's literally in love with John I know, okay, So

he is like, I'm concerned that the club is taking

attention away from us.

Speaker 2: We need all the attention because we're football players.

Speaker 1: They're like, it's literally impossible, Like this entire like town

is obsessed with football.

Speaker 2: Yes, and it's so weird.

Speaker 3: I feel like maybe we talked about this in another episode,

but like, I don't even know who the football players

and the cheerleaders were at any of my schools. To me,

they weren't cool. They weren't who I thought was cool.

I guess, So I don't know.

Speaker 2: Maybe they were cool and popular, but I don't know.

Speaker 3: It's just so funny how in movies it's always like

so obvious who the popular people are because I don't

even fucking know who they were anyway. So then we

go to the club meeting. They're all sitting in a circle,

and you know they're they're trying to get them to

talk about their trauma, very inappropriate questions that PJ starts with,

I think, and then Josie decides she should make up

trauma about Julie, which I'm like, girl, like, I know, well,

you're ahead, and then Isabelle like looks like she's going.

Speaker 2: To cry, like she's very moved, like oh my god.

Speaker 1: Josie's lives were so dramatic, like they were betting on

the girls fighting and stuff, and then he was just

looking at her like, oh.

Speaker 2: Girl, he was like too far.

Speaker 3: And then Isabelle is like, do you want to come

and study with me to Josie, so I'm like, oh

my god. And then we cut to Hazel coming home

and finding out that her mom is fucking the football guy, Jeff.

Speaker 2: I know, what the fuck? Yeah, So that's fucking he's.

Speaker 3: Cheating on Isabelle with an old lady predator.

Speaker 2: Yeah.

Speaker 3: So cut to a fundraiser thingy and they're selling used.

Speaker 2: Underwear and also taking pictures of Yeah. I thought that

word was insane. I was like, oh, they're selling stuff.

And then Isabelle's like, oh my god, so many guys

want my I know. I think she's like, I don't

know why they want them so bad. But I was like, oh,

like because they're gross. They're gonna but.

Speaker 1: Like audacity to show up in person to buy the

used underwear from high school girls in the house so

grossn will surprise you.

Speaker 2: No, I'm never surprised there. I saw.

Speaker 3: I remember a video on TikTok, like a long time

ago of like kids at a skate park and then

there was like a creepy guy that came up and

offered this boy twenty bucks for his sweaty socks ew

and he gave them the socks. I mean, I don't

know I who was set up, but people are fucking weird.

They're like, oh, I thought those socks.

Speaker 1: Are really you know, I believe he's looking at the

ones that are like working, skating the hardest or something.

Speaker 3: Yeah, he's damn Okay, so anyway, men are gross, but

they're making money off of them. And then Hazel is

all sad and so dramatic. She's like, I know, they're like,

what is wrong with you? She was like, well, my

mom is fucking Jeff or she's like that football guy

I don't know, you know, the guy, and they're like,

who are you?

Speaker 1: You were describing every guy, She's just like the main guy.

Speaker 3: They're like Jeff and like yeah, She's like yeah, I

guess yeah. And so then we see the other football guy,

Tim calling to get proof that PJ and Josie never

went to Juvenile Hall. He has like the Yellow Pages.

Speaker 2: I think, yeah.

Speaker 3: Anyway, then we cut to Josie and Isabelle at a

diner where they're studying and flirting and getting strawberry milkshakes,

and they look really good the milkshakes, not the people.

I mean, the people are like fine, but I was like, ooh,

I want a strawberry milkshake. Isabelle tells Josie how she's

impressed by how brave she is, and Josie looks like

she feels kind of bad about lying, and she seems

like she's about to tell her the truth. But then

she like whisses out and is like, I have to

tell you something. Jeff is cheating on you, and then

she starts crying and screaming like very dramatic in the diner.

So then the next day at school, we see everyone

in the cafeteria. There's like a goth kid who's writing

about how he's going to blow up the school. I

thought this was more important than it is, so I

wrote it down. The goth kid with the blow up

the school thing. Yeah, he never blows up the school,

so just so you know, but I wrote it down

because it sort of comes back, but not that much,

not that I'm boringt Isabelle confronts Jeff in front of everyone,

and it's so funny how the football players have this

like table that's like when people get married, they're like

main table and all the little tables are like around them,

Like that's how the football player's table is, or it's

giving like last supper like anyways, so she confronts him

in front of everyone, and she walks away and is

like I'm gonna get revenge, and Hazel is like, we

should like make a small bomb and put it under

his car, and they're like what the fuck.

Speaker 2: She likes, Okay, it's just small. They're like, yeah, let's

make a bomb. Yeah, yes, that is the problem.

Speaker 3: Yeah, like, yeah, we should make a bomb. She's like

she's like oh yeah, She's like, I.

Speaker 2: Do a bomb. And so they go.

Speaker 3: All the girls go in egg and tpe his house

and Isabelle and Josie have a heart to heart in

the car while the others are egging, and then Hazel

doesn't understand that they were joking, so she really does

put a bomb under Jeff's car and it goes off

and it ruins Josie and Isabelle's potential first kiss.

Speaker 2: Like they were like, you know, leaning towards each other

and then the bomb went off.

Speaker 3: Other football guy Tim tells them he knows it was

them that messed with Jeff's house and car and that

the club is going to get shut down, and all

the girls are really sad.

Speaker 2: They're like, oh man, this sucks. It's gonna get closed,

and they're all like it was a good run. Guys

like by like they're they give up really fast.

Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like, okay, well we got what we needed

out of this.

Speaker 2: Yeah.

Speaker 3: Time is his band, and then Hazel and PJ get

into a big fight in front of everyone, and Hazel

calls calls PJ a liar, and PJ calls her a

loser with no friends and a skank mom. And then

we see Tim going after Hazel to talk to her,

so we know he has some kind of plan zomping

up his leave, and then we cut to Isabelle in

Josie's room. Josie tells Isabelle about how her and PJ

have been friends since first grade because they had the

same babysitter, whose name is Rhodes. They call her gay Yoda,

so every time I mentioned her, I say gay Yoda

roads And then Isabelle and Josie finally kiss, Oh my god,

and then we cut to PJ in Britney's fancy room and.

Speaker 2: It's so huge.

Speaker 3: It's like definitely the main bedroom, like her parents give

her the big Girl but it's like in Mean Girls

because Regina George has the main bedroom. And she's like, yeah,

I believe my parents and take caving in to me.

And so they're doing homework on the bed and PJ

does that weird thing where she's like, oh my god,

you're so skin me.

Speaker 2: How can you even hold them, Okay, yeah, She's just like,

how you aren't your arms tired or anything.

Speaker 3: She's just like yeah, and then they kiss and then

Brittany's like, I'm straight, and so then it's kind of

awkward after that.

Speaker 2: And then which we all knew it was like, oh

my god, she's straight. Yeah, you knew she was straight,

except for.

Speaker 3: I don't think PJ. She also gives that kind of

like type of like creepiness. And so the next day

there's like this big PEP rally thing and Josie tells

PJ that she and Isabelle had sex, and.

Speaker 2: The cheerleaders do they do a wet t shirt thing.

Speaker 3: Yeah, but it's just obviously like they're just like making

fun of how sexualized the cheerleading thing is always in movies,

and I don't know, maybe in life.

Speaker 2: I don't know. I didn't know any cheerleaders. I don't know.

I do watch Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders.

Speaker 3: It's my favorite, and He's not my favorite show, but

I'm a big fan of it.

Speaker 2: I got my wife into it too. We're like, is

it that one on Netflix?

Speaker 3: But I used to watch it back in like two

thousand and five when it first started it's gotten better

because they're afraid of body shaming people now, but they do.

Speaker 2: And back then they weren't. They do be like, is

she going to be able to do the kicks? You know? Okay?

Does she have the stamina?

Speaker 3: They try to find like a way, but anyway, I

really like it.

Speaker 2: I'm not going to tell you more about it, you know,

spoil it. You guy should watch it. Folks really good.

And so.

Speaker 3: Issa Isabelle, I give her nicknames.

Speaker 2: I was like, no, you're like, she's letting this okay.

So Isabelle goes and sits with Josie because they're like,

we had sucks.

Speaker 3: And then Tim starts talking to everybody. So he's like

doing the pep rally. He's like on the court. Yeah,

and he starts talking to everybody about the fight club

and he calls Hazel down and they're like, since she's

been in the fight club since the beginning, she should

fight Tucker, the school's number one wrestler or fighter whatever

he is. I want to say, they said boxer, but

they said boxer. He was wearing like a wrestling outfit

or maybe I made that up.

Speaker 2: The entire movie. Yeah, they were like he is like

he's crazy. He's a maniac man was doing anyway.

Speaker 3: So he's huge and Hazel is very small, and she's like,

what the hell I thought I was.

Speaker 2: Gonna be fighting PJ.

Speaker 3: And so I guess tim told her you should come

down here and fight PJ and then surprised her by

having this giant man and so she she trips him

when he comes at her, and then he pushes her

like super hard, and then she gets up and she

punches him and then she tries to scratch his face.

Speaker 2: She does not win.

Speaker 3: Timnn tells everyone that PJ and Josie never even went

to Juvie and they started the club to fuck cheerleaders,

not to empower women, and everyone looks very betrayed, especially

Isabelle because she had sex with Josie under false pretenses.

And I feel like this is really fucked up. Yeah,

and it reminds me, well, it's not the same at all.

I want to make sure that people understand I'm not

saying it's the same, but I hate John Stamos, and

the reason is because he had a lot of like

fans that were girls and women that were like, he's

so hot, I want to fuck him, and he told

this one fan he was gonna have sex with her

and took her into a room and had it be

dark and then had one of his friends, and yes,

which is rape you. She did not consent to having

sex with that person. Yeah, And I hate John Stamos

because he's a bad person.

Speaker 2: He is. He was my favorite on Full House, Full House.

He was until obviously we got older. He was bad. Yeah.

Speaker 3: So PJ decides to blame Josie for everything, and really

they're both guilty. Josie confronts PJ about, like, do you

actually even like Brittany? And I agree too. It's giving

like I feel like there are some women like this,

but I feel that it's mostly a man thing.

Speaker 2: I don't know where.

Speaker 3: It's like they're obsessed with having the hottest girl, not

because they actually like her, but because they want their

guys to be like jealous.

Speaker 2: Oh yea.

Speaker 3: And I feel like that's how PJ is, Like She's like, oh,

this is the hottest girl at school, so like I'm

going to get with her and everyone's gonna want to

be me.

Speaker 2: Everyone's gonna think I'm so cool because they're very unpopular

right now. Yeah, because they're bottoms. Yeah, like the bottoms

of the pack. Yeah, okay.

Speaker 3: So then after they're like in this big fight, PJ

storms off and then they start playing April Lavine and

I felt like it was really appropriate. But now I

can't even remember which song it was. But it was complicated, okay,

I thought it was, but I thought that was too

obvious because that was okay. So then the next day

at school, their lockers say horny freaking number one and

number two, and then the janitor.

Speaker 2: Won't help them.

Speaker 3: Yeah, he's like before and he's like, no, you deserve this,

like and miss mister g they're the guy that is

their teacher whatever it's called teacher at what's the word advisor?

Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like teacher advocate. That's a different thing.

He hates women now again. Yeah, he's like, they fooled me,

so fuck women, Like women are evil and I always

knew they were, Like I knew it, and you guys

try to trick me.

Speaker 3: And so then they show PJ and Josie like being sad,

and then they show PJ eating spaghettios out of the

can and I wanted to ask, you do you like spaghettios?

Speaker 2: I did? Yeah, when I was younger.

Speaker 3: My god, they're so fucking good. Have you ever eaten

them cold like out of the can? Yeah? So good.

I also would do that with like the chef boyardy rabbiolis.

Speaker 1: Oh okay, you know, I feel like been years since

I've had like any of that.

Speaker 3: Me too, it's been like, well, yeah, twenty five years.

Speaker 1: I always think of a little commercial with the can

rolling home.

Speaker 2: I don't remember that the can.

Speaker 1: I'm like, you don't remember the canon rolling thme, you know,

like at the grocery store, and then I think the

mom tells the kids like put it back, and then

they like go home, but the can like rolls and

follows them home, and then it like hits the door

and they're like, oh my gosh.

Speaker 3: No, I think I was too old by that time.

I had moved past my I.

Speaker 1: Think that one just stuck with me because I can't

I wish my cans, I wish my food that my

mom said no to.

Speaker 2: Would you follow me home? Yeah, yeah, that would be cool.

But you were too old you had different pasta. No,

I was out of my canvas era. I was like

a teenager by it. No, I don't know.

Speaker 3: I went through like different bouts of being vegetarian and

trying to be vegan, but it was very hard in

like two thousand and six, so I didn't fully commit

until twenty fifteen, which it was still kind of hard

in twenty fifteen, but you know what, it's getting harder

again because all the vegan restaurants are closing and places

that used to offer vegan options don't have them anymore.

Speaker 2: So we're going back to the dark ages for vegans.

I'm sorry.

Speaker 3: Anyway, So Josie goes to visit Gayoda Rhodes and she

tells Josie not to go to the football game because

people are going to literally like get killed, like and

I was like, wait, what the fuck? So that announcement

was real about them being so violent, and she's like

they always kill one player, and she tells all these

like fucked up things like I think they had a

guy with like horses on yeah side, and they like

ripped him apart, like they always do something really violent

and literally with animals, yeah yeah, oh yeah, because another

one was like they killed him and his dog, And

of course I was like, oh.

Speaker 1: No, I know, I thought that was like Caitlin's gonna

mention this.

Speaker 3: Yes, So then we see PJ alone in her car

and Josie's like running up to her, and then they

fight a little bit more and she's like, no, like,

we have to band together because I found out that

Huntington is going to kill play a player and their pets.

Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, like what the hell?

Speaker 3: So they need to get the club back together so

they can save everyone, and so then PJ agrees. They

go to the game and they're like searching for everybody

at the game. They convince Hazel to forgive them and

make a bomb as a distraction, and then she loves

making bombs. I know that's She's just like, so now

you want to bomb? Yeah, it's like wow. So then

they convince oh I already wrote that. They try to

convince the cheerleaders to join them again, but they don't

do it, and then Hazel sets a bomb on a tree,

but it doesn't go off when it's supposed to. So

that distraction did not work, and they were like, you guys,

to the cheerleaders, they're like, make out with each.

Speaker 2: Other, make out with each other, and they're like what

They're like, uh huh.

Speaker 3: And so that was going to be their distraction because

you know, men are creepy, so they will just like

they would love to watch hot girls make out. And

since the cheerleaders don't do it, then Hazel and PJ

makeout and everybody's like girls make you know, and then

everyone is distracted. There is this funny part where there's

like this old man there and he's like, Okay, enough.

Speaker 2: With this homot shit.

Speaker 3: I want to see some good old football with men

wrestling each other like whatever.

Speaker 2: He's just talking about how football is gay. So it's funny.

Speaker 3: I didn't tell you, but Jeff is very allergic to

pineapple juice, and it is important because Josie now finds

giant vats of pineapple juice, but they're empty, so where

the fuck is the pineapple juice? So this is a

mystery and then they have to figure out where it is.

And then Annie, who is one of the girls from

the group, but I don't think they really say her

name until this part, so I didn't know what her

name was. And then they say like, Annie, you have

to help us. You're the smartest one in our whole group,

even though you're a black Republican.

Speaker 2: And she's like I know.

Speaker 3: She's like, yeah, obviously I'm the smartest, and so Annie

realizes it's in the sprinklers, and so they push Jeff

out of the way to save him, and then the

other team starts coming at them, so obviously they have

to fight them, and then there's this slow motion fight

scene and the girls kick ass. They're all covered in

blood and all the other team guys are literally dead,

and this part where Josie's like, are you okay, like I.

Speaker 2: Don't know, one of them is like you kill me. Yeah.

Speaker 1: They're like, oh my god. So that guy, I think

Josie was telling PJ. She's like, yeah, that guy that

you hit, like he's totally dead, and Josie's and then

Pj's like, yeah, all of them are killed.

Speaker 2: We can't like, we're gonna process this later.

Speaker 3: And so then the sprinklers go off and Hazel's mom

turns it off and everyone starts clapping, and it's so

silly because you see this whole fight scene. I totally

forgot there was like an audience that was just watching

these girls, these high school girls, beating the shit out

of these high school boys that are like two times

their size and like killing them.

Speaker 1: Yeah, all of the audience is just watching They're just

like Silent, nobody intervened.

Speaker 2: They're just like, oh okay, And so.

Speaker 3: Isabelle tells Josie, you know, you didn't have to start

a whole fight club to date me. And then they

make out, and then the bomb finally goes off, and

then the god kid is like that was my idea,

Like he's bad because he didn't set the bomb, and

that's how it ends.

Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a very crazy way. It was so like

ridiculous and over the top, but I thought it was

so funny.

Speaker 3: So now is the moment that you've all been waiting for,

munch Merge Murder. So the options are PJ, Hazel, and Josie.

Speaker 2: Do I go first? Or do you go first? Do

you have your three that you know? I guess okay.

Speaker 3: I feel bad because I know that PJ is the

main character, but she is not likable. Yeah maybe that

to the point maybe she's not supposed to be likable.

Reminds me of joke what no I was gonna say.

Speaker 1: It's like in Super Bad, we're like, yeah, they're supposed

to be funny, but like nobody really liked Jonah Hill because.

Speaker 2: He was like an asshole. I know, but oh my God,

I love Super Bad.

Speaker 3: I know funny, but I'm just thinking of the part

where like Dave Franco and like says something like get

off the field sets or whatever, and he's like, whatever,

go pet your pants, and he's like that was one

time in Dark Gray. Like anyway, I will always quote

that movie. But no, I was gonna say something else,

but I don't remember it.

Speaker 2: Oh. PJ.

Speaker 3: Not being likable and being the main character makes me

think of or just The New Black, Because the main

character is not very likable. I feel like everybody ends

up painting her anyway, So I would murder PJ. Okay,

I would munch Hazel, and I would merge with Josie.

Speaker 2: But she's got to get the lying under control. She's

a pathological questions, really funny.

Speaker 1: She is funny, and she cares about animals like people

and their pets, and overall she seems really calm, like

she seems really she seems like a nice girl.

Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, so what do you say?

Speaker 1: Okay, I think I would munch PJ. As unlikable as

she is, I feel like there's something there Hazel. Now

it's hard between Hazel and Josie because Hazel is like

a criminal in the making. Yeah, and Josie's so sweet,

but I am attracted to Hazel more, so I think

I have to kill Josie and then merge with Hazel.

Speaker 2: Wow. I know, Okay, that's fine. That is your life,

you live in whatever. What would you rate this movie

out of five cherries?

Speaker 1: I really liked this movie, and I was late to

the party watching it, but I'm glad that I finally

got to, like sit down and watch it.

Speaker 2: I would give it a five out of five. Yeah,

oh my, I like it. What about you?

Speaker 3: Well, I really really liked it, but I'm I'm really stuck.

I couldn't decide between four and five because I I

want to give it a four point five, but we're

not allowed to anymore. The reason is because our editor

said it's annoying to do the halfs.

Speaker 2: When she adds in the cherry, she's like making up

your mind. Sure, I think she said a four or five. Yeah,

she's like back doing half numbers. So I'm gonna give

it a five. I really liked it.

Speaker 3: I thought it was so funny and actually very smart

and clever and made fun of a lot.

Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3: So if you are enjoying but I'm a lesbian. Please

head over to our Instagram and TikTok and follow to

stay up to date on our newest episodes and hottest takes.

Follow up, but I'm a lesbian pod on all of

the platforms, even Lemonatee and Blue Sky. Nobody follows us

on Blue Sky. I don't know if anyone uses it,

but I do post on there.

Speaker 2: So we're all there. We'll get over there. Yeah, eventually

everything We're just we are. Come on, y'all.

Speaker 3: Okay, So we will be back in a very short

out of time and we will do our segment three.

Speaker 1: Okay, welcome back and get ready for our super fun

last segment.

Speaker 2: What's up with the heteroes? Yeah?

Speaker 3: So I have another Reddit story of straight people and

I would like to share it.

Speaker 2: And so it starts with am I the asshole? For?

Speaker 1: Yes?

Speaker 2: Probably if you are a man?

Speaker 3: Am I the asshole for divorcing my wife because I

found out her body count? I, twenty seven male have

been married with my wife.

Speaker 2: Wouldn't it be to my wife? I don't know. Yeah,

so he's already don't like stupid.

Speaker 3: I've been married with my wife twenty eight female for

eight months now.

Speaker 2: When I married her.

Speaker 3: I was told to believe we both still had our

vCards because of religious reasons. But yesterday, whilst whilst we

had some friends over, we talked about how young kids

these days have their first time and don't really wait

until marriage anymore, to which my wife responded with waiting

until marriage doesn't make sense anyway, there are so many

safe options now. I chose not to respond and just

listen while our friend group had a discussion about it.

Later that day, I asked my wife if she regrets

waiting until marriage, to which she responded, I didn't wait.

I wanted to tell you, but I never felt comfortable

sharing it. I have to admit that I got furious

and said some things I regret saying, name calling, etc.

And told her to leave my house. Her parents lived

ten minutes away. I feel like I've been manipulated in

that I've been keeping to myself for nothing. We had

been dating for seven months before we married. When she

returned the day after, I asked her what her real

body count was, and she told me with me included,

it was seventeen.

Speaker 2: Would you do what?

Speaker 1: Yeah?

Speaker 2: Such a reaction.

Speaker 1: It just made me that because I thought she's just

gonna be like, oh just no, no, literally, I was

thinking it was just gonna be like the guy that

she lost her virginity too, and like her husband, you're

like her robody cat was seventeen. I'm not like, I

totally that is totally okay. But it's just so funny

because he was so crazy over that.

Speaker 3: Just one just like just like whatever, yeah, oh yeah,

so he is really mad.

Speaker 2: I'm like, no, it.

Speaker 3: Okay, so, to which she added that most of those

were only a one time thing and nothing felt more

like real love than with me.

Speaker 2: He meant to say van with me, but he said.

Speaker 3: Then I told her that she had a month to

pack her stuff and we are getting a divorce. Thankfully,

we signed a strong prenup that stated that in any divorce,

no matter the reason, our assets would not be divided.

She agreed because she is the only grandchild of very,

very rich grandparents. This person is me telling a story.

He's giving so much extra information. So my friends and

her family have been blowing me up, saying that there's

no reason to divorce since it has nothing to do

with our relationship or marriage. But I disagree. If but

I disagree, if I knew she didn't have her vCard,

I would have never married her edit, since it was unclear.

She flat out told me she was a virgin too.

When we started dating, I told her I was waiting

till marriage. After that, I didn't explicitly say I wanted

a wife who was also waiting, but there was no

reason to use the wrong too since she was a virgin. Anyways,

to clarify, I also was upset about what my wife

said about waiting till marriage. That's why I asked her

about it. But the topic, as you can read, soon changed.

I hope this will not be the last edit. The

issue isn't her not being a virgin, as I've stated

in one of the comments. It's about her not waiting

till marriage while I did. If she married and divorce

all sixteen of these guys, that would have been fine.

Although if you had sixteen different divorces, I would probably

not be the seventeenth guy to marry you.

Speaker 2: So what are your thoughts on this?

Speaker 3: I hate, man, I know, I do feel like it's

crazy that she lied that much.

Speaker 1: That's why when you said that was like, wow, whoa, whoa?

Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I feel like maybe she has a

lot of like internalized like misogyny type of thing where

she feels like she is like less than for having

had sex before marriage and also having had sex with

like kind of a lot of people, which is sad.

But it's also like, I think he's an asshole for

divorcing her because of that. But I think that the

bigger point is that she lied, not that she had

sex with multiple people and that she wasn't a virgin.

It's that she lied to him about it that shows

a bigger issue, which I think I think he should

have maybe construed it better. Also, she probably doesn't want

to be married to somebody she had to pretend to

be someone else.

Speaker 2: Yeah, I was, Yeah, like I don't think that they

maybe made for each other.

Speaker 1: I don't think so either, because even when they first

started dating, she was like, I'm a virgin, you know,

like I like they obviously he's a virgin, but like

she could not be obviously he's a but like she couldn't,

like you said, she couldn't be herself. She had to lie,

and then the truth came out after they got married,

And yeah, it just doesn't sound like a relationship that

either one of them.

Speaker 2: Needs to be in and he is like, obviously, I'm

sure she loves him whatever, But I feel.

Speaker 1: Like this is like a blessing in disguise for them

to not be together, because she's gonna realize like, oh

my god, like he literally divorced me over that.

Speaker 2: Would you want to like you?

Speaker 3: I think of it also as like, I mean, I

don't know, they're religious, they probably planned to have kids.

Would you want somebody that would name call your daughter

as she's growing up for you know, doing something like

that exact? That's also bad. I don't think they're a

good match. I don't think she should lie. But I

support women's rights and women's wrongs, so I'm on.

Speaker 2: Her seventeen of them. Yeah, well, she said he was

the one she didn't like.

Speaker 1: Regret or whatever she will later on she be like,

oh my god, I got married to that fucking loser.

Speaker 3: I know. Also, they got married really fast, which is

like pretty crazy. But I also think in like a

lot of religions where it's so important to not have

sex before marriage, people like rush into marriage because they can't.

Speaker 2: Wait to fuck.

Speaker 3: They're like, I just met her, I cannot wait to

marry her. We're getting married in two weeks.

Speaker 1: Not even two weeks and we're tying to not and we.

Speaker 2: Can have sex. Do you remember there was.

Speaker 3: You were probably a child when this came out. It

was like, I don't know what it was called. It

was like married as virgins or something. It was like

followed people that had never had sex, but not only

had they never had sex, they'd never kissed.

Speaker 2: And the one like clip that was everywhere was like,

is it that awkward? Dude? He was like eating her face?

Speaker 1: Ye?

Speaker 2: Yeah, God.

Speaker 3: It was at their wedding, like in front of everyone,

which I've already said a part of the reason that

I never wanted to have a wedding with because I

think it's like awkward to like kiss in.

Speaker 2: Front of my family, but also I'm not that close whatever.

Speaker 3: Anyway, point being weird making now is so inappropriate, But

he doesn't know because he has never kissed before.

Speaker 2: He's like, this is how the.

Speaker 3: He's like yeah, yeah, okay, So AnyWho. That was a

weird story, but I kind of liked it because I

could see both sides. Don't lie, don't lie, don't marry

a weird slut shaving man.

Speaker 2: Yeah, just don't marry a man? How about that?

Speaker 3: Outside it so thank you for tuning in to But

I'm a Lesbian. We are your go to for saffic

media reviews, WLW drama, and unfiltered queer takes. If you

enjoyed the show, please like, share, and subscribe on every platform,

yes all of them if you can, and please leave

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no We have like seven reviews on there and some

of them are really bad, so our rating is three

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should be supportive of the lesbians and go on Apple

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review if if you have the time, please help support

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After all, the algorithms a bitch and we're just two

lesbians with Mike's trying to survive.

Speaker 1: And don't miss next week's episode. We will be recapping

Amy and Jaguar, an epic love story. An epic love story,

but very sad story. Yeah, it's set in nineteen forties Germany.

So you know this movie is not currently available to stream,

so if you haven't seen it, you would need to

rent it or get like a US CBD. But Kaitlin

used Canopy with a K of course, so if you

have a library card, you can use it. But although

I wasn't able to use it because in my area,

my library wasn't signed up with Canopy.

Speaker 2: So you can search on there and you'll see, yeah,

it does depend.

Speaker 3: So just look look up Canopy with a K and

see if your county's library system is included. I found

out about it on TikTok and it has so many

movies on there. But we have library cards and counties,

so maybe you need to get a library card in

my county.

Speaker 2: I just need to move over here. You get a kid. Well,

can you have more than one library card?

Speaker 1: No?

Speaker 2: I don't think can you really? Oh my god, oh

yeah I do.

Speaker 3: Anyway, so if you are in the wrong county, just

go to the neighboring king.

Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, look up what counties are they have and you,

I'm so sorry, get Canopy if you can't. Yes, we

will see you next Tuesday.

Speaker 3: Executive producers for But I'm a Lesbian are Caitlin Batty

and Angelina Herrera. Produced and mixed by Victoria Shiplet. Creative

direction and video editing provided by Juanita Your Your Day.

Music by Stiletto Falsetto