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ways to overcome our fears from the philosophy of Epictetus.
Epictetus is one of the greatest stoic philosophers of all time and his journey to becoming a
master in stoicism is exceptional.
Born in 50 AD, Epictetus was born into slavery and was serving a wealthy master, Epaphroditus,
who served as a secretary to Nero, the Roman Emperor at that time.
Epictetus had the unusual privilege of being given the right to study philosophy by his
master - a right he took maximum advantage of.
Epictetus devoured Stoicism quickly, and what stuck with him was how practical Stoicism
is, and how it can truly help people alleviate their pain.
According to the stoics, everything around us operates through a web of cause and effect
resulting in the rational structure of the universe which they called “LOGOS”.
And while we may not have control over the events that affect us, we do have control
over how we approach things.
This was something Epictetus had the chance to study under one of the most influential
stoic philosophers, Musonius Rufus.
From there, Epictetus dug deep into it, and when given his freedom, he pushed his learning
until he became a teacher himself.
Epictetus left us two main books, his most famous book “Discourses”, and the “Handbook”,
two books that served as a north star for many stoics who came after him, especially
the great Marcus Aurelius.
Fear, according to Epictetus, is at the root of all our pain.
Although there are rational fears, most of the ones that make us anxious are irrational,
and thus one has to clarify one’s fears, and get rid of the ones that don’t make
any sense.
Most of our fears, according to the Stoics, come from a deep attachment to external things,
and that is something that is not coherent with Stoicism.
A stoic should be detached from anything that does not fall under their control, which is
why in today’s video we’re going to share 5 life teachings from Epictetus on how to
overcome fear.
1- Make Sense of Fear
Epictetus says “Philosophy’s main task is to respond to the soul’s cry; to make
sense of and thereby free ourselves from the hold of our griefs and fears”.
When Epictetus became a teacher himself, he emphasized rationalizing our fears, meaning
that if we analyze each one of our fears, we’ll see that there’s no real basis to
many of them, and the only reason we have them is that there's a bigger fear - the fear
of social disgrace.
What he means by this is that when we fear losing our jobs, for example, it is not just
because we’ll become jobless that we’re afraid, but because of how the people around
us will see that, potentially labeling us as failures.
He also teaches us that many of our fears that we think are related to necessities are
in fact just desires, like the businessman who thinks he can’t live without a driver,
and the families that think they can’t live without a nanny.
And so, he directs us to discern between what’s really a necessity, and what is not, and for
those that are not, we should not fear them, nor get attached to them emotionally.
Epictetus urges us to look deeply into our fear as a first step to getting rid of irrational
ones.
Nowadays, the world is in no shortage of irrational fears.
Our world is marked by excessive possessions and consumerism and this desire to accumulate
as many possessions as possible ends up developing so many fears and anxieties in us, one could
be forgiven for thinking that every single thing we desire is essential to our very existence.
For example – the fear of not owning a car – this particular fear would create unbearable
anxiety in many people, many of whom will feel that a car is vital and their survival
depends on it.
Although a car makes life much easier, at the end of the day, it’s just one transportation
vehicle, and there are many out there that we can utilize without having the need to
possess them, like public transport or a taxi.
Ofcourse, we do have rational fears, but those never change throughout our history.
For example, the fear of not having access to clean water, food to eat, or being in a
dangerous and fatal situation.
These are fears that even our great ancestors had.
Therefore, we should reconsider what we fear today, and filter the fears that are rational
from the ones we only think are rational, but are not so in reality.
One of the ways Epictetus urges people to overcome fears is by studying philosophy.
In Epictetus’s case, philosophy is what made him reach such a high awareness of our
fears and how to deal with them.
Philosophy is a remedy to see life as it truly is.
It empowers our minds.
We become more prepared to discern between the things that deserve our thinking, and
things we should let go of.
We become more aware of our fears and whether they’re rational or irrational.
One can also seek to make sense of one’s fears by experimenting with those fears, like
those who climb mountains specifically because they fear heights.
Just make sure you analyze them well, and see them for what they truly are from an objective
lens.
Always, remember, if fear was an ocean, then you’re a human being who can get out of
the ocean, not a fish who swims endlessly in it.
2- Embrace life trials According to Epictetus “We must be afraid
of neither poverty nor exile nor imprisonment, of fear itself only should we fear”.
Epictetus’s teachings urge people to focus only on what’s in their control, and not
give any external events any emotional attachment.
For, we have no power over those events, and they happen regardless of what we want or
do not want.
This principle of only focusing on what you can control is a cornerstone of stoic philosophy
and this dichotomy of control is particularly true for fears.
Most of the things that we fear today are completely out of our control.
In Epictetus’ case, the emperor Domitian was irritated by the stoics, and thus, he
exiled Epictetus and many other philosophers from Rome.
However, since the ban decision was out of his control, he accepted it, went to another
city, and proceeded with his teachings, perhaps with more belief in them.
Life is full of surprises.
So much so that that’s a common expression today, but the problem with surprises is that
they can be bad as well as good and we can’t prepare for them otherwise they wouldn’t
be surprises.
So what can we do?
Should we live in fear?
In a constant state of anxiety?
That cannot be the answer.
We should empower ourselves to embrace or at least accept the things we wished hadn’t
happened.
If we can do that, it can trigger greatness within us.
In Stoic philosophy, we call this “Amor Fati”, which means “Love of Fate”.
Amor Fati means accepting one’s life entirely, with its good and bad, fortunate and unfortunate
events, and embracing it all.
For example, let’s say you’ve been working on a project that you think has a lot of potential
but once you get your project out there, it doesn’t get the reception you were hoping
for.
Although you tried so hard to overcome the difficulties, you came to the conclusion that
sadly, that idea is not the right one.
You’ve put your blood, sweat and tears into this.
You’ve reached out to people to invest in you, but you did not get the returns you expected.
Although it’s been a great learning experience and you are happy with many aspects of your
projects, the final reception is not something you have control over.
You did everything you could, and it didn’t work, so why would you consider yourself a
failure?
Many great entrepreneurs failed more than they succeeded, and they kept going.
Because that is the human spirit, that is love of fate.
When dealing with unfortunate events that do not fall under our control, one should
either meet it with indifference, or use it to one’s own advantage and act accordingly
and only then can we find ourselves reaching greatness.
3- Believe in your ability to do wonders
Epictetus teaches us that “Unremarkable lives are marked by the fear of not looking
capable when trying something new”.
Being born into slavery, the chance that Epictetus would be remembered as one of the greatest
philosophers of all time was vanishingly slim.
It was his master who gave him the chance to study philosophy, but who would have thought
that Epictetus would become one of the masters of that very philosophy.
Sure, Epictetus’ motivation was not to be the greatest, but he definitely believed in
his ability to deliver value and pursue knowledge, even if he was just a slave among sons of
wealth and families of knowledge.
Epictetus went against the odds.
And with all the unparalleled hardships he faced, he became the greatest Stoic teacher
in the Roman Empire, giving us an example to always believe in ourselves.
If life had an unspoken synonym, it would be trials and a wonderfully simple-but-accurate
representation of this would be in the classic video game, Super Mario Bros.
The scrappy plumber does his absolute best to defy the odds and save the princess, having
to overcome many trials to reach his goal.
But no matter how hard the game gets, he keeps going at it fearlessly or literally dies trying.
Although we may not face the same fatal challenges as poor Mario, we certainly face many problems
that take a lot from us and thus create this illusion that reaching our final destiny is
nearly impossible.
And so we fear to take difficult steps, be it in your professional life after a failure
or in moving on after a break up because you do not want to lose what you think is left
of you and fear what you see in front of you.
However, with our limited time on earth, shouldn’t we make something out of it?
Indeed, we will all face tough challenges many times throughout our lives, but isn’t
that just part of the bittersweet beauty of what makes life, life?
Imagine yourself starting a podcast, for example, and you bring on many diverse speakers, you
try with different formats, different topics, you do everything well, from the marketing
side, to the production, but no matter what you try it just refuses to take off.
But one day, with one guest you didn’t even realize was special, it blows up, and your
podcast starts trending, reaching the top of the charts in your country.
Who would have thought?
But was it a surprise for you?
Not exactly....
It was pure dedication and unshakeable belief.
Although the previous episodes didn’t get the right initial reception and were judged
as failures, you believed in what you had to offer, and eventually, your efforts were
rewarded.
Therefore, we should dare to take risks, and to fail.
Dare to overcome the hardships that life might throw at you.
ALWAYS remember, greatness is only unlocked when we get tested, if not, our greatness
would always be in question.
4.
Don’t fear other people’s judgment
In the words of Epictetus “If you are tempted to look for outside approval, realize that
you have compromised your own integrity.
If you need a witness, be your own”.
Epictetus’ Era was one where there was a group of people called the sophists, who go
way back in time to Ancient Greece, but maintained their presence throughout the ages.
The sophists were those intellectuals who knew how to go about things, debate, and were
masters of rhetoric.
But a sophist was also one who searched for approval and if he gets into a debate, it
is not to seek new knowledge, but to show people how well-spoken and learned he is.
The difference between a sophist and a stoic intellectual is that a sophist does it for
the other to applaud him, and a stoic does it for his own self, not worrying about others.
And that is exactly what Epictetus wants from us.
Being driven by others’ approval only compromises us as human beings.
As a matter of fact, when you are this obsessed, you’ll fear exploring new things and new
horizons to grow as a person, for the only reason that it might hurt your reputation.
In our lifetime, whatever direction we’re going to take, we’ll find those who’ll
build us up, and those who’ll tear us down.
However, there’s one way that might help us avoid this, and that is by remaining static,
not taking any direction, staying in place, never moving forward.
But what good really comes from this?
In this situation, what’s the difference between us, and a mere rock?
Yes, we will continue to exist, but it’s the journey that makes us special as human
beings - it is what makes us grow and flourish intellectually and even physically.
Other people’s criticism or opinions about us aren’t in our control and since they’re
not in our control, one shouldn’t place too much importance on them.
Instead what is in your control is acceptance.
We should accept that with every action we take, we’ll be judged, maybe even laughed
at, and that’s ok, if that’s the price one has to pay to reach one’s goals.
You should not fear taking actions that are not coherent with what others do and instead
explore the things that you want, the knowledge that gets you going, and horizons that you
want to travel beyond.
5.
Get rid of the fear of death In our final quote from Epictetus for this
video, he says "I cannot escape death, but at least I can escape the fear of it".
Epictetus was not only a slave at first, but also debilitatingly unwell.
And thus, he had to learn to accept death and embrace it as if it was lurking around
every corner, because while we may ignore it, death lurks nearby for all of us, on a
daily basis.
However, for Epictetus, all those who try to escape death by not thinking about it,
are only fueling the fear of it.
If you really want to get rid of any fear, you should look at it as if it’s standing
right in front of you, and face it head-on.
This is just as true for fear of death as fear of anything else.
For Epictetus, everything happens in our mind, and if we could only direct it to see things
differently, it would be free from many concerns.
According to Epictetus, the key to getting rid of the fear of death is changing our perception
of it.
It is very common to see people changing the topic whenever death is brought up in a discussion.
However, Epictetus urges us to change our perception and start thinking about death
frequently, even on a daily basis.
Entertaining this idea of death in our mind turns it into a normal event and thus, it
alleviates the pressure related to its uncertainty factor, and it is fair to say that this uncertainty
is what makes us anxious.
But it is essential to discuss death as you would any other topic and not only reserve
it for moments of grief and sadness.
How we talk about it has consequences on how we perceive it.
For example, stoics perceive death as a reminder that our life is short and we should make
the most out of it, living every single moment of it as if it’s the last.
There’s a particular concept that talks about this, known as Memento Mori, which means
remember that you have to die.
And for the stoics, the best thing you could do to enjoy your life is to remember death.
Every morning when you wake up, ask yourself - If today was my last day, what would I be
doing?
This daily visualization about your death can impact your actions significantly.
You will start to look forward to maximizing and making every single hour, minute, second
count.
And that’s the power of remembering death, that’s the wisdom behind Memento Mori.
It is the freedom from fear of death that lets us explore our intellectual potential
and thrive.
And this freedom starts with just a mere change of perception.
Fearing death will only prevent us from living, sleeping, and becoming who we could become.
Fearing death will only stop us from thriving, growing, and enjoying the journey of life.
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