<v Speaker 1>I'm Jerry, Katy and Josh six one hundred.

<v Speaker 2>This is the part of the program where we read

<v Speaker 2>a listener message that came in and you guys get

<v Speaker 2>to sound off about it because they need some advice.

<v Speaker 2>So phone lines are wide open. Text line is wide open.

<v Speaker 2>We'd love to talk to you guys. This is from

<v Speaker 2>britt Britt in Littleton, Brittany and Lyttleton. I'm a step

<v Speaker 2>mom of two girls, twelve and fourteen, and after years

<v Speaker 2>of slowly earning their trust, We're finally in a good place,

<v Speaker 2>which is why I feel like I'm about to mess

<v Speaker 2>things up. So she goes on to say, the other night,

<v Speaker 2>they came into my room and said, we need to

<v Speaker 2>tell you something, but you have to promise not to

<v Speaker 2>tell our dad. And I promised, which now I feel

<v Speaker 2>like was a huge mistake. Both girls admitted they've been

<v Speaker 2>secretly messaging boys.

<v Speaker 3>Ewoo.

<v Speaker 2>She says, nothing inappropriate, nothing scary. I saw the messages.

<v Speaker 2>It's just normal middle school crush stuff. But their dad

<v Speaker 2>has a very firm no dating until high school rule,

<v Speaker 2>and they know he would not be okay with this.

<v Speaker 2>They kept saying, please don't tell him, he'll freak out

<v Speaker 2>and honestly, they're probably right. So she says, now I'm stuck.

<v Speaker 2>If I tell my husband, I break their trust and

<v Speaker 2>maybe ruins in years of progress. If I don't, I'm

<v Speaker 2>hiding something from him about his own daughters and going

<v Speaker 2>against a rule that he clearly said. So what matters

<v Speaker 2>more here, protecting the bond I've built with the girls

<v Speaker 2>or being honest with dad? And she goes thoughts, I'll

<v Speaker 2>be listening, And that is from Brittany in Lyttleton. So

<v Speaker 2>if you're a step parent or just a parent in

<v Speaker 2>general that would like to sound off about this. Three

<v Speaker 2>O three six nine one one mix three O three

<v Speaker 2>six nine one sixteen forty nine. Now, I've never had

<v Speaker 2>to deal with, uh this in my life, but I

<v Speaker 2>would imagine, you know, girls that are aged twelve to

<v Speaker 2>fourty team, Yeah, that's probably a hard friendship to crack

<v Speaker 2>when you're a step mom, right.

<v Speaker 4>Well, yeah, and just being a girl at that age

<v Speaker 4>is hard. And not to discompletely like just dismiss the

<v Speaker 4>dad here, but I kind of feel like she has

<v Speaker 4>better knowledge of what those girls are going through right

<v Speaker 4>now with those boys, right like she could probably steer

<v Speaker 4>them in the right direction. Dad has the typical dad

<v Speaker 4>stance of you're never gonna date true, you'll forever be

<v Speaker 4>my baby, and that's like that's a parent thing, and

<v Speaker 4>I get that, like that's totally you know, okay, But

<v Speaker 4>I think it's it's hard when girls get into the

<v Speaker 4>stage because you don't want to shame them. You don't

<v Speaker 4>want them to think they're doing anything wrong by talking

<v Speaker 4>to somebody that they're attracted to, are just interested in,

<v Speaker 4>you know. So you've really got to be careful with

<v Speaker 4>the situation. And I just feel like the step mom's

<v Speaker 4>you know, the whole relationship with these girls. Yeah, I

<v Speaker 4>rules is rule leaning on the side of maybe she

<v Speaker 4>like tells the dad there's something going on, but like

<v Speaker 4>lets him know I can handle this, Like I've got

<v Speaker 4>a handle on this. You don't need to freak out.

<v Speaker 4>You don't need to, you know, flex and let them

<v Speaker 4>know that you're the boss because that's not needed here.

<v Speaker 2>And he's just being the parent rule and the rules

<v Speaker 2>of rules.

<v Speaker 4>So it does fuck.

<v Speaker 2>And this could be all starting innocent too with these girls.

<v Speaker 2>It could trickle into something that's not so innocent. Something

<v Speaker 2>could be da is worried.

<v Speaker 4>That's something the stepmom would know better. Than I think

<v Speaker 4>the dad, because she also went through it.

<v Speaker 2>Don't tell her role does it?

<v Speaker 4>Don't tell her yes, But I think that again her

<v Speaker 4>you know, whole point there is that she's seen the messages,

<v Speaker 4>she knows that they're innocent, and she's just trying to say,

<v Speaker 4>dun't trying to do the right thing.

<v Speaker 2>Here's what we're gonna do. I see the phone lines

<v Speaker 2>already ring in, So if you'd like to sound off

<v Speaker 2>three O three six nine one one mix three oh

<v Speaker 2>three six nine one sixteen forty nine. Should Brittany and

<v Speaker 2>Littleton tell her husband that his two girls twelve and

<v Speaker 2>fourteen are talking to boys when he doesn't want that

<v Speaker 2>going on? We want your calls and comments. Next it

<v Speaker 2>is Sianna Hi, Sianna Hi, the good morning, What do

<v Speaker 2>you say? What this show wants to know? Segment.

<v Speaker 5>Actually, I think this is a really great opportunity for

<v Speaker 5>the stepmom to encourage honesty and open communication with the

<v Speaker 5>dad and to kind of coach the girls into how

<v Speaker 5>to do that in tough situations and tough conversations. And

<v Speaker 5>I think that that builds even more trust.

<v Speaker 2>I love it because I mean, there are two parents

<v Speaker 2>in this situation, and you start, you know, with one

<v Speaker 2>little secret, what's next, next thing? You know, you're keeping

<v Speaker 2>twenty secrets from dad. You know, it's not.

<v Speaker 5>Helping exactly, and that puts the strain on that relationship

<v Speaker 5>with the dad and the step off. So I just

<v Speaker 5>think this is a really good opportunity to coach the

<v Speaker 5>girls on how to have difficult conversations with a parent.

<v Speaker 2>Yeah, dads should be involved too, you know, dads need

<v Speaker 2>to be involved, especially with their little girls. Absolutely, and the.

<v Speaker 4>Stepmom can still say like, I'm on your side. I

<v Speaker 4>just feel like we need to include your dad because

<v Speaker 4>he needs to know this about you.

<v Speaker 2>That's good.

<v Speaker 5>Yeah, yeah, And sometimes what we think is going to

<v Speaker 5>be a huge consequence or a huge judgment actually isn't.

<v Speaker 5>And it opens opportunity to show your family members, like

<v Speaker 5>a maybe there is a softer, approachable side to you

<v Speaker 5>that maybe they think there's not.

<v Speaker 4>It's a really good point.

<v Speaker 2>Boy, you're so wise, look at you almost sure and

<v Speaker 2>smart whatever.

<v Speaker 5>It's only because I've been there, done that more times

<v Speaker 5>than I have wanted to be.

<v Speaker 2>But you know what, that's why we do this segment

<v Speaker 2>because our listeners who write in need people's advice, who've

<v Speaker 2>gone through it, just like you, Siana.

<v Speaker 4>You've been in their shoes.

<v Speaker 2>Thank you for having us on, thank you for having

<v Speaker 2>the courage to call us. You're the best.

<v Speaker 5>Thank you. Have a good day you as well.

<v Speaker 2>I Hi, big girl, what are your thoughts?

<v Speaker 1>Well? I agree with Sienna, But the other thing I

<v Speaker 1>would say is when you were initially meeting that Brittany

<v Speaker 1>had said dating, and I think texting and dating are

<v Speaker 1>two entirely different things. You're just texting and you're just

<v Speaker 1>talking on a text, then that's one thing. And I

<v Speaker 1>still think I agree with Sienna. I still think it's

<v Speaker 1>a good idea to teach the girls how to talk

<v Speaker 1>to dad, because he's not a bad guy. He's a

<v Speaker 1>good guy, right.

<v Speaker 2>The bottom line is dead. He's just kind of, you know,

<v Speaker 2>looking out for him, right, Like he's not being a monster.

<v Speaker 1>No, no, So I think truthfully, I don't think that

<v Speaker 1>that's a huge thing. And when you don't make it

<v Speaker 1>a huge thing, then it's not going to be a

<v Speaker 1>huge thing for the girls to talk to their dad.

<v Speaker 1>You got to remember, as soon as you start blowing

<v Speaker 1>it out of proportion, that's when kids start going, oh

<v Speaker 1>my gosh, it's going to freak out. Absolutely, you got

<v Speaker 1>to keep it really on the down low and real call. Okay,

<v Speaker 1>you're talking, okay, but this is something we need to

<v Speaker 1>talk to that about because he's just concerned, and this

<v Speaker 1>is how you show him you're being responsible.

<v Speaker 2>Well another very wise call. Well on your phone kind

<v Speaker 2>of sucks, but very wise call.

<v Speaker 4>With the kids, they take their cues from you, So

<v Speaker 4>if you freak out, that gives them justification. I know

<v Speaker 4>you were going to freak out, you know. Really that

<v Speaker 4>is such a good tip.

<v Speaker 2>Or if you like, if you say, yeah, I'm not

<v Speaker 2>going to tell your dad, it does teach the girls

<v Speaker 2>too that it's okay to keep all these secrets.

<v Speaker 4>Yeah, you know, and the keeping secrets part is not okay.

<v Speaker 4>But again, like you can still have their side. I

<v Speaker 4>think that's the thing is kids just want you to

<v Speaker 4>understand them. They want to have a little control in

<v Speaker 4>their life, and just you on their side gives them

<v Speaker 4>a little bit of that. You know.

<v Speaker 2>Here's a guy's perspective.

<v Speaker 3>Hi, John, Hello, hello everybody.

<v Speaker 2>Hi, we're super dupes buddy. Where are your thoughts on this?

<v Speaker 3>A few thoughts as a as a Brady Bunch household myself,

<v Speaker 3>I think the the line are. You're always a parent first, right,

<v Speaker 3>she wants to be a little bit of their friend,

<v Speaker 3>but that that doesn't work out, right, You always gotta

<v Speaker 3>got a parent first, and then the friendship can happen.

<v Speaker 2>There.

<v Speaker 3>There is a better way to do it than not.

<v Speaker 3>But you have to be honest with the parents because

<v Speaker 3>if parents aren't on the same page, you can't make

<v Speaker 3>the proper decisions. And when when line starts happening, that's

<v Speaker 3>when problems really start to arise.

<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because I mean, look at the iff from the

<v Speaker 2>dad's point of view. He finds out that this is

<v Speaker 2>going on, and Brittany hasn't been telling him. It's just

<v Speaker 2>going to turn into an argument within them, you know,

<v Speaker 2>and trust issues within them, and that's going to be horrible.

<v Speaker 6>So I think if if if she's on her swifty dad,

<v Speaker 6>they can talk about it before he reacts to the

<v Speaker 6>daughters and totally get her perspective. That's totally fine, right,

<v Speaker 6>but she can't.

<v Speaker 3>Keep it from moving. That's just great, bigger issues than

<v Speaker 3>the one that girls are. You know, the girls will

<v Speaker 3>get over it, right, they're his kids.

<v Speaker 6>Yeah, we'll move on to life.

<v Speaker 3>The next problem will happen, The next boy will come

<v Speaker 3>or whatever happens, and so move on.

<v Speaker 2>But the line will stick around and you're in the

<v Speaker 2>thick of it, buddy, you're an expert with your brady

<v Speaker 2>bunch of family. Thank you John for the call. Really

<v Speaker 2>appreciate you guys. I know, right, or you just take

<v Speaker 2>their phones and throw them in the trash, right, Well,

<v Speaker 2>I can do that too.

<v Speaker 4>Yeah, there's part because that's the thing is like nowadays

<v Speaker 4>with kids, they have all the code words, they've got

<v Speaker 4>all the sneaky apps that they can text on, you

<v Speaker 4>know what I mean. So I think we got a

<v Speaker 4>text from Sherry who kind of reminded me. I remember

<v Speaker 4>with Baby Nana. It was like that you have to

<v Speaker 4>check all the apps on their phone because they can

<v Speaker 4>hide messages and stuff.

<v Speaker 2>Oh yeah, so you've really.

<v Speaker 4>Got to dive in if you want to keep them safe.

<v Speaker 4>And she said that she dealt with the same thing

<v Speaker 4>where it was not innocent on the other person's part.

<v Speaker 4>So the boy who was texting her daughter was asking

<v Speaker 4>for naughty things. You know, they had to shut it

<v Speaker 4>all down, take the phone away, take the laptop away,

<v Speaker 4>and that can happen. So it's just important to know

<v Speaker 4>what's going on with your kiddos.

<v Speaker 2>Consensus is have a talk with the girls, understand what

<v Speaker 2>they're going through, and then just be like, hey, we

<v Speaker 2>do need to talk about this with your dad as well.

<v Speaker 2>We got to bring them in the loop. I think

<v Speaker 2>that was generally the consensus. Yeah, all right, So there

<v Speaker 2>you go, Britt, brittin no secrets. It's in no secrets, girlfriend,