<v Speaker 1>When women say things like well I don't really care

<v Speaker 1>about money, I just want love. I'm always like side

<v Speaker 1>eyeing them a little bit because please stop pick me.

<v Speaker 2>She like you might want to care. Now, Okay, hey babe.

<v Speaker 1>It's Asia Christina As this is quality queen control.

<v Speaker 2>What is happening?

<v Speaker 1>Hello, my angels, happy whatever day that you're listening to this.

<v Speaker 1>Before you do a thing, I want you to hype

<v Speaker 1>the video.

<v Speaker 2>I've had enough. You need to make sure that you

<v Speaker 2>were hyping this.

<v Speaker 1>Video, because hello, you love me and we love girls

<v Speaker 1>apporting girls.

<v Speaker 2>How's everyone feeling? I'm feeling great.

<v Speaker 1>My producer was just telling me that my aura is up,

<v Speaker 1>and I was like, no, like how can you?

<v Speaker 2>How can you tell?

<v Speaker 1>Like I don't know what it is like today I

<v Speaker 1>woke up, I woke up early, like effortlessly, like I

<v Speaker 1>was already up by like seven thirty am, and just

<v Speaker 1>like really living my best anti lazy girl life today

<v Speaker 1>and just feeling just like I'm just feeling like I'm

<v Speaker 1>just vibing like so high, like I am my higher

<v Speaker 1>self today.

<v Speaker 2>Praise him.

<v Speaker 1>So today's topic, as you guys can see, is realizing, Yeah,

<v Speaker 1>dating for love is cute, but Marrying for money is

<v Speaker 1>definitely strategy. And I know that this is going to

<v Speaker 1>trigger a lot of people, and quite frankly, I don't

<v Speaker 1>care because I'm just gonna go ahead and say what

<v Speaker 1>everyone's thinking.

<v Speaker 2>Nobody wants to say this out loud.

<v Speaker 1>But yes, dating for love is cute, it's sweet, it's emotional,

<v Speaker 1>but marrying for money is strategy. And I know that

<v Speaker 1>people are sitting here getting triggered. You can relax because

<v Speaker 1>this conversation is actually not about being a gold digger.

<v Speaker 1>For all the red pill men, I don't even know

<v Speaker 1>what repo really is, but I've heard about it for

<v Speaker 1>over the years with my content that always want to ask, well,

<v Speaker 1>what are you bringing to the table? Okay, because you're

<v Speaker 1>just bringing what a podcast to the table?

<v Speaker 2>Sir sorr.

<v Speaker 1>See, if you try to insult me with that same thing,

<v Speaker 1>it doesn't really sting, It doesn't sing at all. But

<v Speaker 1>for you, doesn't that feel like it hurts a little bit?

<v Speaker 1>Perhaps I don't know AnyWho. This is about being a

<v Speaker 1>woman who understands that who you marry will inevitably determine

<v Speaker 1>your entire life. And I don't think any of us

<v Speaker 1>can sit here and negotiate with that, Okay, argue with eamma.

<v Speaker 1>So we've all been sold this idea that love should

<v Speaker 1>be the primary factor in choosing a husband. And upon

<v Speaker 1>my research, I have listened to countless interviews and listened

<v Speaker 1>to many married couples, and I remember one time, I

<v Speaker 1>don't remember what it was that I was watching, who

<v Speaker 1>it was, but I remember one of the questions that

<v Speaker 1>was being asked was do you think, and this was

<v Speaker 1>to a married person, do you think that love is enough?

<v Speaker 2>Oh? Now, I remember.

<v Speaker 1>It was the go Off podcast where these two women

<v Speaker 1>were like some sort of journalist correspondents or news correspondence,

<v Speaker 1>and they were interviewing Rachel Lindsay from The Bachelor, and

<v Speaker 1>they asked her is love enough to sustain a marriage?

<v Speaker 1>And I believe, I believe this is in the podcast

<v Speaker 1>with Rachel Lindsay that someone said, I don't want to

<v Speaker 1>misquote anyone, but somebody basically said, and I believe it

<v Speaker 1>was Rachel Lindsay, she said, like, no, it's actually not.

<v Speaker 1>Love is not enough to sustain a marriage. And it's true,

<v Speaker 1>you've ever been in a relationship with someone where all

<v Speaker 1>you have is love, but there are so many other

<v Speaker 1>areas and factors in your life that is unmet. One

<v Speaker 1>of the one of my favorite analogies that I heard.

<v Speaker 1>I think this lady's name was Spirit, I kid you

<v Speaker 1>not like her Instagram at the time at least was

<v Speaker 1>called talk to Spirit, and it was like the number

<v Speaker 1>two talk to Spirit, I believe. And she gave this

<v Speaker 1>brilliant analogy that I've mentioned over the years, where she

<v Speaker 1>was saying that let's just say when it comes to compatibility,

<v Speaker 1>right that or like whether or not you believe that

<v Speaker 1>someone is compatible with you, I should say you have

<v Speaker 1>a square, and let's say the person that you're with

<v Speaker 1>is a circle. No matter how many times you shrink

<v Speaker 1>or expand that circle within the square, there are still

<v Speaker 1>four corners that are left unmet. So all things considered,

<v Speaker 1>that means that wait you, no matter how much you

<v Speaker 1>shrink or expand yourself, that person that is the square

<v Speaker 1>will always be left feeling unfulfilled. That is the most

<v Speaker 1>brilliant analogy that I've ever heard of as it pertains

<v Speaker 1>to dating and relationships, because it's one of those things

<v Speaker 1>where sometimes things feel intangible.

<v Speaker 2>You can't quite put your finger on.

<v Speaker 1>It, but it just feels like it's almost it's not

<v Speaker 1>quite the right situation. All right, So you've been sold

<v Speaker 1>this idea of follow your heart, Mary for love, struggle together,

<v Speaker 1>you gotta build together. And I'm not saying that love

<v Speaker 1>doesn't matter. Let me be abundantly clear here. I am

<v Speaker 1>not saying that love doesn't matter. I'm not telling you

<v Speaker 1>to go marry some eighty year old like Anna Nicole

<v Speaker 1>Smith and wait till he croaks over.

<v Speaker 2>That's not what I'm saying.

<v Speaker 1>But what I am saying is love is just simply

<v Speaker 1>not enough to sustain a life. It's not because you

<v Speaker 1>know what, you can't pay your bills with love. You

<v Speaker 1>can't pay your bills with that. Because marriage is not

<v Speaker 1>just emotional, it is financial, It is logistical. It is

<v Speaker 1>a life style decision. And I think a lot of

<v Speaker 1>women do not realize that until they're already in it.

<v Speaker 1>I'm at the age now where in my thirty is

<v Speaker 1>that it's like, that's the next thing you do in life.

<v Speaker 1>You get married, you gotta whatever. And I don't know,

<v Speaker 1>I've always had such a peace about marriage because I'm like,

<v Speaker 1>I understand that it is one of the biggest decisions

<v Speaker 1>you will ever make in your life, and it is

<v Speaker 1>solely your choice, so we're gonna see who.

<v Speaker 2>Is actually choosing.

<v Speaker 1>Well, all right, so let's get into reality for a second,

<v Speaker 1>because let's look at the data, all right. Financial stress

<v Speaker 1>is one of the leading causes of divorce, So couples

<v Speaker 1>who earn less money are significantly likely to break up.

<v Speaker 2>End of story. Argue with your mother.

<v Speaker 1>In fact, lower income couples are about thirty percent more

<v Speaker 1>likely to get a divorce rather than higher income couples.

<v Speaker 1>So when you really are looking at the numbers, divorce

<v Speaker 1>rates drop as the income increases. All right, So what

<v Speaker 1>does that really tell you, Well, it's not just about love.

<v Speaker 1>It is actually also about stability, because love does not

<v Speaker 1>remove the stress money does. Just like how people say,

<v Speaker 1>does money buy you happiness? Okay, I think everyone's gonna

<v Speaker 1>say no, it doesn't, but it buys you freedom. Freedom

<v Speaker 1>is happiness. Hello, Like you know what I mean?

<v Speaker 2>Freedom is happiness.

<v Speaker 1>Sometimes there are things that we know that money cannot

<v Speaker 1>buy you, which is time, right all the time? It can't,

<v Speaker 1>you know, money can't. There are things that money cannot do.

<v Speaker 1>But I think we can.

<v Speaker 2>All agree here.

<v Speaker 1>Let the church say, amen, okay, we can all agree

<v Speaker 1>that it matters.

<v Speaker 2>End of story. It matters.

<v Speaker 1>And I know that we live in a society where

<v Speaker 1>it's like, oh, gold diggers, all these different things. A

<v Speaker 1>lot of you don't have any goal to dig and

<v Speaker 1>you're so concerned about it because you actually don't have it.

<v Speaker 2>But notice that men that do actually have it.

<v Speaker 1>And I'm not talking about your average rappers who mishandle

<v Speaker 1>their money and don't really have money like that, because

<v Speaker 1>there are bigger dogs and fish that are actually running

<v Speaker 1>the program other than them. Okay, I'm not talking about

<v Speaker 1>those types of men that are in certain lifestyles where

<v Speaker 1>their lifestyle is heavily predicated on the appearance of having

<v Speaker 1>money rather than actually having it. Not only that, stewarding

<v Speaker 1>their money well also matters because you that's personally there's

<v Speaker 1>someone for everyone, And I know for me, it was

<v Speaker 1>never going to be an athlete, it was never going

<v Speaker 1>to be a celebrity like it was just I'm not

<v Speaker 1>into men that are want to be front center stage.

<v Speaker 1>And you can call it whatever you want. Maybe it's

<v Speaker 1>because I am I don't know, you can say whatever

<v Speaker 1>you want like maybe, so I don't know, but I

<v Speaker 1>just don't love the idea. Also, I think of just

<v Speaker 1>my man doing the same thing as men. I want

<v Speaker 1>something different. I've always liked different than me, right, So

<v Speaker 1>I don't want you to beat us to both be

<v Speaker 1>on social media. I don't want I want something. What

<v Speaker 1>else are you bringing to the table. Okay, I'm bringing

<v Speaker 1>the creativity are you bringing You're bringing the finance to it. Okay,

<v Speaker 1>you're bringing a very logical brain to it. I'm bringing

<v Speaker 1>the creative side that sort of thing. That's what I mean.

<v Speaker 2>I digress.

<v Speaker 1>Okay, But there's a real risk that women are taking

<v Speaker 1>when we are not considering these things. Divorce the D

<v Speaker 1>word because everyone thinks, oh, that won't be me until

<v Speaker 1>it is. And on average, a woman's income drops, actually

<v Speaker 1>it drops drastically after divorce shocker, where we're talking around

<v Speaker 1>a forty percent decrease that a woman's income can drop

<v Speaker 1>after divorce. So not only are you now heartbroken your

<v Speaker 1>life has completely changed and you're enshambles, but now your

<v Speaker 1>entire lifestyle is officially compromised. Your living situation changes, your

<v Speaker 1>financial security changes, everything changes. So when you are choosing

<v Speaker 1>a man, you are not just choosing companionship, You're actually

<v Speaker 1>choosing a financial outcome as well.

<v Speaker 2>Argue with your mother this is just the facts. And

<v Speaker 2>let's also add.

<v Speaker 1>Another little fresh statistic. There are people that let's just say,

<v Speaker 1>people earning under this is just the facts.

<v Speaker 2>I will list my sources.

<v Speaker 1>Someone remind me to do it, because I actually very

<v Speaker 1>well might forget to list the articles. But people that

<v Speaker 1>are earning This is not my opinion, this is what

<v Speaker 1>I've researched and saw. Let's say, under fifty k have

<v Speaker 1>divorce rates that are seventy percent higher than those that

<v Speaker 1>are making six figures plus, okay, and divorce rates are

<v Speaker 1>going to drop as the income rises, like I said,

<v Speaker 1>especially once you're past the two hundred k mark.

<v Speaker 2>All right.

<v Speaker 1>So, like I said, love is not going to reduce

<v Speaker 1>is not going to reduce the stress. It is, in

<v Speaker 1>fact the money that's going to be reducing the stress.

<v Speaker 1>And financial stress is one of the biggest killers in

<v Speaker 1>a relationship, all right. So considering that divorce is extremely

<v Speaker 1>financial financially devastating for women, all right, it's financially devastating,

<v Speaker 1>I'd say for both parties, but it's especially financially devastating

<v Speaker 1>for women.

<v Speaker 2>Okay.

<v Speaker 1>So households in general tend to fall dramatically after divorces,

<v Speaker 1>and they don't fully recover for years, so you will

<v Speaker 1>need thirty percent more income just to maintain the same

<v Speaker 1>lifestyle post divorce. Okay, So that's why I said, you're

<v Speaker 1>not just marrying that man, You're marrying the financial outcome,

<v Speaker 1>all right, and if that marriage ends, you inherit the

<v Speaker 1>consequences of that.

<v Speaker 2>Okay.

<v Speaker 1>Now, like I said, the risk that we as women

<v Speaker 1>are taking is going to be divorce and.

<v Speaker 2>Being that, your situation is going to change.

<v Speaker 1>And now we realize, okay, we are choosing a financial outcome.

<v Speaker 2>We have to realize that in couples.

<v Speaker 1>Where the husband earns significantly more, it's they're least likely

<v Speaker 1>to divorce, not never likely, but least likely to divorce.

<v Speaker 1>So when women out earned their men, holds up, pulled up,

<v Speaker 1>swoll up, divorce likelihood actually can increase about fifty percent

<v Speaker 1>in some studies. Okay, But marital satisfaction is going to

<v Speaker 1>drop when those financial roles feel very unstable. So it's

<v Speaker 1>not about the ego here. We're talking structure, all right.

<v Speaker 1>Money is going to shape dynamics, expectations as well as stability.

<v Speaker 1>We're talking life style. So now, speaking of lifestyle, we

<v Speaker 1>have to realize, well, who you marry equals your entire lifestyle.

<v Speaker 1>You know, I actually saw a quote that said one

<v Speaker 1>time that be careful of the man that you choose,

<v Speaker 1>because you should look at the life of his mother

<v Speaker 1>and see if you would want that life for yourself.

<v Speaker 1>I know that doesn't go for everyone, like, but I

<v Speaker 1>do genuinely feel like a lot of that A lot

<v Speaker 1>of the time that tend to be true. So if

<v Speaker 1>you don't want the life of what that you know

<v Speaker 1>his mother has, then perhaps you should start to actually

<v Speaker 1>consider who you're marrying.

<v Speaker 2>All Right.

<v Speaker 1>Marriage is going to determine where you live, the school

<v Speaker 1>that your kids are going to go to, your stress level,

<v Speaker 1>your access to opportunities. Being in the right relationship for

<v Speaker 1>both men and women should actually elevate the both of you.

<v Speaker 1>Marriage will also determine your ability to leave if things

<v Speaker 1>go wrong. Hello, So you have to consider to yourself. Okay,

<v Speaker 1>you were choosing your environment, you were choosing your future,

<v Speaker 1>you were choosing your standard of living. So when you

<v Speaker 1>say you know, or when women say things like well

<v Speaker 1>I don't really care about money, I just want love,

<v Speaker 1>I'm always like side eyeing them a little bit because

<v Speaker 1>please stop pick me show like you might want to

<v Speaker 1>care now, okay, because you will care when life gets real.

<v Speaker 2>And if you don't care, life is going to do

<v Speaker 2>it for you.

<v Speaker 1>Right. You ever heard that quote that says I would

<v Speaker 1>make a joke about your life. But it looks like

<v Speaker 1>life has done that for you.

<v Speaker 2>Ellol.

<v Speaker 1>So, like I said, you are not just choosing a partner.

<v Speaker 1>You were choosing your zip code. You were choosing you know,

<v Speaker 1>peace of mind a lot of the times, at least

<v Speaker 1>as it pertains to the finances and your future children's reality.

<v Speaker 1>If you guys can't steward what you have right now,

<v Speaker 1>do not expect it to change in marriage.

<v Speaker 2>It's just like how back in the day.

<v Speaker 1>I don't know if women still think like this, but

<v Speaker 1>they you know, there's some women that are silly minded

<v Speaker 1>and they thought, oh, you know, if I have a

<v Speaker 1>baby for him, then he's gonna love me because I'm

<v Speaker 1>the mother of his child. Men will still dislike you

<v Speaker 1>as you are the mother of their child, their children. Okay,

<v Speaker 1>Like I think we've all learned that by now. So

<v Speaker 1>I think that we have to also understand that when

<v Speaker 1>we are choosing who we are going to be with,

<v Speaker 1>we are choosing a certain reality for ourselves and the

<v Speaker 1>family that we are supposed to have or that we

<v Speaker 1>will potentially have.

<v Speaker 2>So you have to ask yourself, is he currently even

<v Speaker 2>living the way? In marriage?

<v Speaker 1>Things will exasperate. That's what people fail to realize. What

<v Speaker 1>you see now is only going to magnify. It's not

<v Speaker 1>going to just randomly change. He's not gonna stop cheating

<v Speaker 1>on you simply because you're married now. No, if he

<v Speaker 1>was a cheater all throughout the relationship, that's not going

<v Speaker 1>to just change because of legality papers marriage, the whole bit.

<v Speaker 1>It's just not so remember that when you are choosing

<v Speaker 1>a partner, all right, marriage is literally a financial contract.

<v Speaker 1>I don't care what you have to say. I think

<v Speaker 1>you know we're this about to go. Marriage creates shared assets,

<v Speaker 1>it creates tax benefits, it creates wealth building opportunities. So

<v Speaker 1>what if so if you choose the wrong partner, that

<v Speaker 1>can financially cost you for decades.

<v Speaker 2>All right.

<v Speaker 1>We tend to romanticize marriage because marriage is a beautiful thing.

<v Speaker 1>It's a union, it's a covenant under God. But legally

<v Speaker 1>and financially, that's your business partner. Why is this like

<v Speaker 1>why is this like a secret? Like why is it

<v Speaker 1>like such a big deal that like people don't want

<v Speaker 1>to talk about these things.

<v Speaker 2>No, no, no, no no.

<v Speaker 1>I welcome this conversation because it needs to be had.

<v Speaker 1>And you can't walk around walking on eggshells knowing good

<v Speaker 1>and well that inevitably you will live out what isn't

<v Speaker 1>being spoken. Okay, So it's important to have these conversations

<v Speaker 1>so that you understand what it is that you were

<v Speaker 1>actually stepping into. Okay, you it is a financial contract

<v Speaker 1>at the end of the day, because of the power

<v Speaker 1>dynamics and the stability. Okay, because financial dynamics will affect

<v Speaker 1>the relationship stability.

<v Speaker 2>You want to go out.

<v Speaker 1>You don't ask this man for anything, you and you're

<v Speaker 1>not even asking for a vacation or anything like that,

<v Speaker 1>but little date nights. You know, Oh my gosh, we

<v Speaker 1>can't even afford to make this a better dynamic because

<v Speaker 1>we just don't have the money. And like I said,

<v Speaker 1>I am a firm believer in I can do bad

<v Speaker 1>all by myself. I will never be with someone with

<v Speaker 1>a man and be struggling.

<v Speaker 2>No, no, no, no, no, I.

<v Speaker 1>Don't think so struggling and be in a relationship me

<v Speaker 1>never never, never, no struggle and me no that's not

<v Speaker 1>I think, not.

<v Speaker 2>Back it up and redo it like no.

<v Speaker 1>Okay, So studies actually show that marriages where the man

<v Speaker 1>is financially stable and leading tend to have lower divorce rates. Shocking.

<v Speaker 1>In other news, water is wet because this is the thing.

<v Speaker 1>And I think I said this in a previous podcast,

<v Speaker 1>but I saw someone that was talking about how being

<v Speaker 1>with a man that is wealthy, let's say, is the

<v Speaker 1>fast track to becoming richer self. And not just because

<v Speaker 1>you're taking his money or you're some sort of gold digger,

<v Speaker 1>but it's about the elevation of lifestyle and the opportunities

<v Speaker 1>that it creates for you to have. Now you can

<v Speaker 1>have your little high yield savings investment account. Now you

<v Speaker 1>learned about investing in stock portfolios and roth iras and

<v Speaker 1>et cetera, et cetera. He's elevating you and the money

<v Speaker 1>that you had, you know, with the same job let's

<v Speaker 1>say that you had. You you're not stressed. Now you

<v Speaker 1>can take that money and invest it and do something

<v Speaker 1>with it, as opposed to, you know, using that money

<v Speaker 1>out of your own pocket and having to do these

<v Speaker 1>things yourself.

<v Speaker 2>Let me tell you something.

<v Speaker 1>Men have one main job and that main job in

<v Speaker 1>priority is to provide and protect. They run parallel to

<v Speaker 1>each other. I don't want to hear it. I don't

<v Speaker 1>want to hear it. And if you want a different experience,

<v Speaker 1>go ahead by all means, save room for the rest

<v Speaker 1>of us with sense.

<v Speaker 2>Okay.

<v Speaker 1>When there is financial instability, there is unclear roles, or

<v Speaker 1>there's pressure on both people, then obviously tension is going

<v Speaker 1>to increase. And again, it's not about ego here, It's

<v Speaker 1>about structure. It's about security. What do we as women want.

<v Speaker 1>We want security. We want security, we want to feel protected,

<v Speaker 1>we want to feel like we are provided for. Okay,

<v Speaker 1>so this is solely just about woman being able to

<v Speaker 1>feel supported and not strained. Why would you get into

<v Speaker 1>a relationship with someone and you're living worse. I just

<v Speaker 1>I really don't understand. There's no elevation in the room.

<v Speaker 1>You mean to tell me, like, I don't know. It's

<v Speaker 1>just it's so unfathomable to my brain that I actually

<v Speaker 1>can't even conceptualize it.

<v Speaker 2>I can't. I can't even think those thoughts, like, it's

<v Speaker 2>just it's what do you mean?

<v Speaker 1>Okay, let's talk about the idea of building a man. Now,

<v Speaker 1>I need I need everyone to hear me when I

<v Speaker 1>say this. You can build with a man, but you

<v Speaker 1>should not have to build him. And there is a difference,

<v Speaker 1>and you can decide on your own what it's like

<v Speaker 1>to build with that man.

<v Speaker 2>Okay.

<v Speaker 1>For some woman that looks like you're going fifty to fifty,

<v Speaker 1>good luck to you.

<v Speaker 2>Guys.

<v Speaker 1>Okay, that looks like going fifty to fifty and accepting

<v Speaker 1>all of his low effort and ridiculousness because you're you

<v Speaker 1>call yourself building with him. I say, building with a

<v Speaker 1>man is yeah, he's going to be building. I will

<v Speaker 1>be here emotionally to help to steward him through those things,

<v Speaker 1>so I can understand and hear it out. But I'm

<v Speaker 1>not gonna settle into anything until we've built it. I'm

<v Speaker 1>not settling in while you're building.

<v Speaker 2>I'm not. Asha is not.

<v Speaker 1>But you can. Okay, So you can, you can. You

<v Speaker 1>can do whatever you want to do. You know that, right, Well,

<v Speaker 1>you do it anyway, Okay. Like I said, there's a difference,

<v Speaker 1>and you should never have to build the guy, all right.

<v Speaker 1>And then a lot of you want to bring children

<v Speaker 1>into this world. When you have a child right in

<v Speaker 1>front of you and it's your man, all right, because

<v Speaker 1>too many women are out here. They're investing years, energy, emotions,

<v Speaker 1>and even money gagged. They're also investing into potential and

<v Speaker 1>men would never and men would never and what a man?

<v Speaker 2>What would a man never do? Invest in potential?

<v Speaker 1>So stop it. Potential is not going to pay the bills.

<v Speaker 1>Potential is not going to create stability. Potential is not

<v Speaker 1>going to guarantee anything, all right, So let's reframe what

<v Speaker 1>the gold digger narrative really actually is. And this is

<v Speaker 1>what people love the name gold digger. Like I said,

<v Speaker 1>many of you don't have gold to dig. And let

<v Speaker 1>me say this clearly, having standards is not gold digging.

<v Speaker 1>People could say whatever they want, Honestly, that's not the

<v Speaker 1>worst thing to be called, all right. Wanting financials to

<v Speaker 1>bild is not shallow. I've had enough. It's not shallow.

<v Speaker 1>Wanting financial stability does not make you a gold digger

<v Speaker 1>and some and you have to understand, ladies, men holds

<v Speaker 1>a lot more power being in our lives than I

<v Speaker 1>think we realize. They truly have the natural ability to

<v Speaker 1>determine the way that things you're going to go, which

<v Speaker 1>is why we're having these conversations and it's very important

<v Speaker 1>to intrinsically understand that you are inevitably choosing a lifestyle.

<v Speaker 2>Hello.

<v Speaker 1>With that being said, you have to understand that wanting

<v Speaker 1>a certain quality of life is not wrong and you

<v Speaker 1>shouldn't have to feel like you were being forced in

<v Speaker 1>or give yourself this timeline of you know what, forget it.

<v Speaker 1>I'm thirty years old, I want to be married. Hopefully

<v Speaker 1>we can work this out. What are we going to do?

<v Speaker 1>Breakup and people are going to wonder what happened? And

<v Speaker 1>then I have to start over. What if I never

<v Speaker 1>meet anyone again? And we get into all these things,

<v Speaker 1>and you don't realize that forever is a long time.

<v Speaker 1>That when you are married, like I said, thirty to

<v Speaker 1>fifty is twenty years. The novelty of we're in the

<v Speaker 1>phase of life where everybody's getting married now is now

<v Speaker 1>worn off. Now you're having to live out your life

<v Speaker 1>with this person. It's not the same anymore. Now you're

<v Speaker 1>contemplating wish you had the courage to do what you

<v Speaker 1>should have done when you were younger. But because you

<v Speaker 1>let desperation lead the way and be the path that

<v Speaker 1>illuminates what your destiny is, I don't know you're settled

<v Speaker 1>into the reality your life is a sum of the

<v Speaker 1>decisions that you've made. Are you happy is the question

<v Speaker 1>to ask yourself. So, like I said, wanting a certain

<v Speaker 1>quality of life is not wrong. It's intelligent. Be intelligent,

<v Speaker 1>beauty and brains. Because men understand the importance of money, right,

<v Speaker 1>they pursue it, they respect it, they build their identities

<v Speaker 1>around it. When woman prioritize it, now, it's a problem.

<v Speaker 1>Now that to me seems like it's called conditioning. Conditioned

<v Speaker 1>as a society to like I said, men are intrinsically selfish.

<v Speaker 1>That's why I'm sure many women can relate to this.

<v Speaker 1>You get into a relationship and it's like you're cooking,

<v Speaker 1>You're doing all the white dudes. You're cooking, you're cleaning,

<v Speaker 1>you're doing his laundry, you're ironing his clothes.

<v Speaker 2>The only thing this man is doing.

<v Speaker 1>Is waking up, brushing his own teeth, scrubbing his own

<v Speaker 1>butt barely that barely that okay, and going to work.

<v Speaker 1>And then you have the audacity to be going fifty

<v Speaker 1>to fifty with him. So you're doing his work, your work,

<v Speaker 1>contributing financially and please please stop. So let's be balanced. Right,

<v Speaker 1>money alone is not going to make a good husband.

<v Speaker 1>We understand that, right. You can absolutely be with a

<v Speaker 1>wealthy man who is emotionally unavailable, someone that is unfaithful,

<v Speaker 1>and someone that is unst and that's not what I'm

<v Speaker 1>advocating for. What I'm saying is you actually do, in

<v Speaker 1>fact need both character and financial stability, discipline and provision

<v Speaker 1>because one without the other will inevitably cost you.

<v Speaker 2>So here is the truth. Dating is going to be

<v Speaker 2>emotional dating.

<v Speaker 1>You know, marriage is strategic and it should be strategic.

<v Speaker 1>And the woman who don't understand that, refuse to accept

<v Speaker 1>and understand that, are going to get a certain outcome.

<v Speaker 1>And the woman who do understand this are going to

<v Speaker 1>move differently. So they're going to ask themselves, can this

<v Speaker 1>man sustain a life that I want?

<v Speaker 2>Because, like I said, forever is a long time.

<v Speaker 1>Does this man align with the future that I see

<v Speaker 1>for myself? And don't lie to yourself because you're the

<v Speaker 1>one that has to live the lieout what will my

<v Speaker 1>life actually look like with him on a day to

<v Speaker 1>day basis? Because you are not just choosing a partner,

<v Speaker 1>you are choosing your lifestyle. It is one of the

<v Speaker 1>you cannot choose your family. You can choose your partner.

<v Speaker 1>Please choose well, ladies, please, you are choosing your peace.

<v Speaker 1>You're choosing your future children's reality.

<v Speaker 2>And that.

<v Speaker 1>Is not something that you should ever leave to feelings alone.

<v Speaker 1>Because love, at the end of the day, it is beautiful, right,

<v Speaker 1>But stability is peace, and the smartest woman.

<v Speaker 2>Like me, they choose both.

<v Speaker 1>So I hope you guys have enjoyed today's podcast. I

<v Speaker 1>hope that it has deeply resonated with you because I

<v Speaker 1>want you guys to really remember, Yes, it is true,

<v Speaker 1>money alone does not equate to happiness, right. But and

<v Speaker 1>it's not just about chasing, you know, a rich man, okay,

<v Speaker 1>It's really about choosing a financially stable and discipline aligned partner.

<v Speaker 1>We have to understand nuance here and that two things

<v Speaker 1>can be true at once. You can have both. Let's

<v Speaker 1>not limit ourselves. I'm not on the side of dating

<v Speaker 1>eighty year olds and marrying just solely for money, because hello,

<v Speaker 1>if you want to have kids with that person, you

<v Speaker 1>want to touch that person, girl, I think not.

<v Speaker 2>I think absolutely never.

<v Speaker 1>Okay, So, like I said, make sure that you rate

<v Speaker 1>this podcast with five stars and make sure that you

<v Speaker 1>hype the video. If you're watching it on YouTube, wish

<v Speaker 1>me a happy birthday too. I don't know when it

<v Speaker 1>is that this episode's going to come out, but wish

<v Speaker 1>me happy birthday still.

<v Speaker 2>I don't care.

<v Speaker 1>With that being said, my loves do not forget that

<v Speaker 1>I love you, and God loves you. I'll speak to you,

<v Speaker 1>beautiful angels in my next podcast episode