The Ballad of Leo and Simon

The Ballad of Simon and Leo

Simple Simon met a Pieman, Going to the fair, Who had a tray of fairy cakes With “Leo” written there. Said the Pieman onto Simon, “I think you’re second best, You may have gotten one or two But I’ve bought all the rest!”

Simple Simon and the Pieman Glared with mutual hate; Leo’s icing had a glaze And it sealed Simon’s fate. Paschal, who, with Leo ran, Said, “Simon, sorry, he’s my man!” Apologies, like cakes are free, Che sarà, sarà, it has to be. Simple Simon and the Pieman Has a morale tale: Those who offer sweeter cake Win more than those who fail. Chickens counted pre-natal Can never really be your pal, They wait to peck the finer cake And crow, but for appearance sake.

Now Leo waves his manifest He thought it up himself! An early riser, like the rest — Poor pay and all self-help! But Leo’s lip was always loose, to give advice, or give abuse Your civil rights he will traduce Your pension, dole, he will reduce;

Don’t think that you can go on strike, Like Tebbit, Leo’s got a bike, Just work, and work, until you’re dead, Remember what poor Simon said.

— © Frank Callery, May 20th, 2017.