Desperate

During our between season hiatus we decided to finally dive deep into John Rowland's other life as John Tucker (from the iconic John Tucker Must Die)! This iconic film has it all: whale tails, Ashanti, MILFs, and some truly bizarre PE fashion choices. Don't miss all the fun as we get real nostalgic about this piece of classic cinema from 2006. BUCKLE UP!

The ending wasn't what we expected, but we did go out with a literal bang. There was a ton of set up for season 3, death, ruthlessness, and too much disappointment. 

There is a non-existent timeline on this show, but we are ignoring that. Apparently it's been one year since Mary Alice died, Rex died, Melanie Foster was murdered, and Martha Huber was murdered? Dang. Regardless, Susan tries to be independent, Lynette is done with her lying-son-of-a-bitch husband, Bree is not enjoying the psych ward, and Gabby is suspicious Carlos is fucking their pregnant ser...

This week on Desperate Houswives... Susan tries to get Edie to confess to burning down her house. Bree dedicates all her energy towards Danielle after giving up on Andrew. Lynette follows Tom to discover the truth. Gabby and Carlos butt heads over the treatment of their surrogate, Xiao Mei. Felicia’s ultimate plan for Paul is finally revealed. 

We never thought Andrew would reach this level. Never. Listen to hear all about how heinous Andrew's actions have become, how Susan for once didn't disappoint us, how we've lost all hope in Tom, and how Carlos is still Carlos.

Bree goes to desperate lengths to stay close to Peter. Karl leaves Edie and Susan tries to hide her true involvement. Lynette helps Ed add some romance back into his marriage. Gabby and Carlos finally meet the father of their baby.

Shame. Shame. Shame. We still hate Susan, but hate Karl more after he plays her harder than ever before. Bree finally accepts Andrew AND Justin. Gabby and Carlos surprise no one and turn out to be horrible parents while Lynette learns some parenting tips about giving the sex talk from Mrs. McClusky. Still, everyone here has something to be ashamed for.

After a small hiatus and many tech issues, we're back! Thank you to everyone for your patience! We're so happy to be back at it.  This week on Desperate Housewives... Susan and Karl’s scheme is brought to light and both have to pay the price. Gabby and Carlos solve their baby daddy issue, for now. Bree gets a new sponsor and faces new developments in  Andrew’s emancipation case. Lynette is for...

Breaking and entering. Strippers. Statutory rape. Is this season 1? It's not, but the ladies are up to their normal hijinks. Lynette faces a problem with a breast feeding mom at the office. Gabby and Carlos find a hot mom to adopt from. Bree gets too drunk in what appears to be a Nordstrom. Susan is in a love square? Oh, and Matt Applewhite is 19. Crazy times!

This week on Desperate... Bree faces legal action from a surprising source. Susan finally goes under the knife. Tom struggles being Lynette’s subordinate. Gabby and Carlos run into an unexpected road block in their adoption process. Zach finally meets his grandfather.

This week on Wisteria Lane...its Valentine's Day and only Susan, Edie, Dr. Ron, and Karl celebrate. Bree is busy drinking and babysitting. Lynette and Tom head to work. Gabby and Carlos get a visit from Gabby's mother. Oh, and Zach finds out who his daddy is! Plenty of love to go around. Buckle up!

Note: We had technical issues for the first 10 minutes of this episode, but after that it's smooth sailing!  This week... Bree visits Caleb and Betty finally comes clean. Susan needs surgery and desperately tries to get health insurance with Karl’s help. Gabby and Carlos have their second experience with slave labor. Lynette helps Tom with his new boss’s frat-like hazing. Mike’s old boss finds...

A battle begins between Betty and Bree and while Danielle is NOT a model she is officially the dumbest daughter on earth. Susan considers surgery from her lover/doctor. Tom and Lynette are about to work together again? Meanwhile, Carlos and Gabby gave us the feels with some talks about having a baby, only after Gabby brawls with a nun though. Per usual, buckle up!

This week on Desperate Housewives... Susan fakes an illness to flirt with a cute, young doctor. Lynette’s kids get chicken pox which leads to an unexpected stand off with Tom. Gabby’s past comes to haunt her. Bree gets arrested. 

Gabby kisses Tom. Lynette kisses Carlos. Andrew kisses Justin. Julie kisses Zach. Susan kisses Mike's ass. We chat about our confusion about where the season is heading and how everyone is sucking someones face. Buckle up!

This week on Desperate Housewives... Zach returns from Utah. Betty and Matthew hatch a plan to bring Caleb home. Lynette saves a marriage in an attempt to bring daycare to her work. Gabby takes her feud with Sister Mary to the next level. Susan attempts to connect with her birth father and receives a message from his wife. Bree brings Andrew home from camp and makes a shocking confession. 

We thought Dr. Goldfine was a goner, but found out he is not the first death of season 2. Meanwhile, Carlos found God, Susan found her father, and Lynette found a way to get back at Nina once and for all!

After falling down the stairs last episode, Gabby suffers a miscarriage and gets a lesson on grief from an unlikely source. Susan discovers her father isn’t who she thought he was.  Lynette worries her kids are vulnerable to strangers and devises a scheme to prove it to Tom. Bree sees a new side to George when his possessiveness gets the best of him. Caleb is found and arrested following hi...

ANOTHER MURDER OCCURS. Lynette and Tom find a unique couple to watch their kids. Susan rebounds from Mike with who other than Karl. Gabby tries to hide her pregnancy from her old model girlfriends. The Applewhites continue to try to hide their secret, but Matt ends up with a date with Danielle? Bree falls further into George's web of lies and he straight up kills her therapist.

This week on Desperate... Bree and George take their relationship to the next level after some major red flags pop up, Gabby and David have a near death experience, Nina mercilessly bullies Lynette, and Susan's lies finally catch up to her.  

This episode was all about being there for one another. We meet Susie's Lonnie, see Bree the most unhinged she's ever been over Rex, realize Lynette is the hottest bitch around, and learn Gabby has a sense of humor. After all that we ask, who are your ride or dies?

We're back from our Thanksgiving mini hiatus! This week on Desperate Housewives... Susan helps Mike look for Zach and makes a decision that could change her relationship forever.  Gabby hires a handsome and successful new lawyer who has ideas of his own.  Bree tries to bring George more into her life which causes problems with Andrew. Lynette battles against Parker’s new imaginary friend for...

Susan is grating. Bree thinks she loves George? Lynette does superior prop work. Gabby misses John while John is now sleeping with old broads. This episodes works, but not hard enough.

Control is the theme of this week's episode and our gals all have varying levels of it in their lives. Susan's ex returns... but not in the way one might expect. Bree struggles through another episode with her suspicious mother-in-law. Gaby attempts to take control of her finances. And last but not least... Lynette uses some unconventional methods to get her house back into shape. 

We're back! Not much has changed on Wisteria Lane since we left Susan held at gunpoint, Lynette heading back to work, Gabby being pregnant AF and Bree now a widow. The only question is, what the hell will happen this season?!

We recap the entire first season of Desperate Housewives! Listen to us breakdown the clothing, heights of the actors, ranking of characters, and much more! Season 2 coming November 1st, 2021!

The end is here! Well, just the end of season one. We are given the whole story of why Mary Alice Young killed herself, the answers to the big questions of all the storylines, and very little closure. Will Lynette go back to work? Will Carlos kill John? Will Susan and Mike make it? What's up with Paul? How will Bree ever go on? We just don't know. So come back for season two of Desperate where ...

This week we continued the tampered birth control plotline, saw Lynette's past decisions come back to bite her, and witnessed yet another break in on Wisteria Lane. Can these ladies catch a break? Or do they just invite more drama when things calm down? Catch it all on our latest episode!

Why do we say "I do"? There is emotional cheating, physical cheating (we think), secrets told to secret lovers, and a couple reuniting in this episode! Also Paul is more suspect than ever, but is finally meeting his match.

Things on Wisteria Lane come to a head at Carlos's farewell party for his "Government Sponsored Vacation". Gabby realizes her pregnancy happened due to some shady behavior, Bree fights for a questionable friendship, Lynette faces a ghost in her and Tom's relationship, and Susan's kitchen... explodes?! Catch this week's episode for all the details. 

Whew. Mike gets the living shit beaten out of him on a pursuit for his boss. Gabby is back on her bullshit. Susan and Sophie double date walking mugshots. Andrew assures us he is sociopathic and Lynette saves a life she wishes she hadn't. We can't believe season one is almost over but things are buck wild!

This week the ladies navigate motherhood! Susan's mother clumsily comes to town, Gabby might have some baby daddy drama, and Lynette and Bree deal with the big spanking question! Honestly, not how we thought a Bree/Spanking storyline would go down, but we still have hope that we'll catch a glimpse of what her and Rex get up to. 

What is girl code? We learn from Susan what it's not. Andrew commits his most heinous act yet. Rex turns us on? Most importantly, Juanita returns...to be buried.

Backed up sewage... Lice... and a Little Black Book... all of these and more are featured in this week's episode of Desperate! The ladies face various scandals and try to keep things in control. And... Maisy Gibbons is back and more bitter than ever! Listen now to catch up on all the scandalous fun on Wisteria Lane!

Abstinence is not the answer! Mike somehow got hotter and Lynette is now our least favorite person, ever? This episode is an experience, so buckle up!

This week we get the full Valentine's Day experience on Wisteria Lane... which is to say that it was quite eventful! S&M, gun shot wounds, and the discovery of a past identity! Hear all about these and more. 

We got hot and bothered over someone unexpected this week. Like really hot, and really bothered. It was the lighting...or maybe it was his sweater? Young love budded, a proposal was made, men squared off and men were kicked out! Listen now to unearth all the drama. This episode was J-U-I-C-Y!

While not all the stories this week hit the mark, we had a lot of fun discussing them! Prepare yourself for birth control tampering, a misuse of ashes, and a VERY in depth tutorial on proper gun toting. You won't want to miss the shenanigans our ladies find themselves in this week!

Watch out for the numerous contradictions we present and debate related to Tom seeing Claire naked and Mike dropping the L-word. Edie sings! Susan sings! Karl points some finger guns! We have not and will not be moving on from the wackiness of Wisteria Lane in this episode.

This week our gals face some serious challenges: an affair, slave labor, harbored fugitives, and a nanny that is too good at her job. Okay... maybe not all of their struggles are serious, but there's still a lot to discuss. 

In an episode where marijuana is smoked, piss is thrown, statutory rape is revealed, and an arrest is made, we're left with only one question: WTF is a charity fashion show?

Our death count tallies at 2 now! Listen to us recap scenes that brought us to tears, horrified us, and left us laughing uncontrollably—all in the span of one, single episode. Where's that Emmy? Buckle up and listen safely.

A first date. A break-up. Drinking and driving. A hit and run. 2 deaths? This episode is jam-packed. Join us as we explore the rules of competition on Wisteria Lane. Buckle up!

We guess that if the sex is bad in the suburbs, you just hire a sexual surrogate? Sheesh. This episode also features a home for troubled young boys, a Little Red Riding Hood rewrite, and a gambling addiction. The women really throw down.

Is breaking and entering the normal etiquette in suburbia? Our journey down Wisteria Lane gets wild as Jordan drops the C word about the cop Susan dates, we play more "f*ck, marry, kill" with the characters, and continue to learn about Zach, Paul and our overarching mysteries. Buckle up!

We introduce two new segments this episode! Desperate deeds and a classic f*ck, marry, kill. The girls go places they've never gone before as Bree chases her son Andrew down at a strip club and Carlos commits a hate crime by mistake. Susan is still fighting for Mike's affections against Edie, while dodging Mrs. Huber's blackmail attempt. Lynette thinks about medicating her boys while Paul learn...

Welcome back Housewives! S1, E3—Pretty Little Picture, Part 1, is live now. Listen to learn about the desperate husbands and prepare for the dinner party of a lifetime covered in this episode. A line we will think about every day for the rest of our lives is uttered. Buckle up!

The gals prepare for a dinner party at Bree's house and we are introduced to the desperate husbands our ladies settled for. In Part 1 we see what the women are most afraid of and what they do when faced with their fears.

If you're just joining us, you can buckle up and listen to our two-part Desperate Housewives pilot recap. If not, then welcome back! The ladies of Wisteria Lane contemplate how well you really know anyone after finding a mysterious note in Mary Alice Young's belongings. They then proceed to prove that you never know anyone at all, even your closest neighbors.

If you're joining us for the first time, make sure to listen to"Episode 1--Pilot, Part 1." If not, welcome back! After the wake, we see what these women really get up to. We wouldn’t say they’re desperate, but we don’t think they’re friends.