The Centre Ground

Aug 15, 2015, 11:30 AM

The centre ground is where things will change eventually just not quite yet The centre ground seems to nudge rightwards year after year The centre ground is where the lobster pot boils hottest The centre ground gives you a lollipop after kicking you in the privates The centre ground may have to modernise the lollipop policy The centre ground is where the power lies right there start digging keep digging The centre ground is available for after dinner speaking at a reasonable rate The centre ground will bail out a bank as long as it isn’t a food bank The centre ground turns democracy into a game of musical chairs played on one seat The centre ground says you better tell us what happened before my partner gets angry The centre ground is the slow lane on the right wing motorway The centre ground is redrafting the party’s core values The centre ground thinks that you don’t share the party’s core values The centre ground can sing the red flag as loud as you can The centre ground found 80s Russia more oppressive than boarding school The centre ground is photographed catching the tube to where their car is parked The centre ground is somewhere between Land’s End and Hadrian’s Wall The centre ground wears a blue tie on Sundays The centre ground can afford the affordable housing The centre ground is where the herbivores head as carnivores scout the periphery The centre ground guesses the correct amount of jellybeans in the jar The centre ground says get your own jellybeans The centre ground is the spot where change is least visible

I’ll take the higher ground instead

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