Stop Fighting About Who Picks Up The Kids: The Transportation Clause You Actually Need
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In this episode, I'm breaking down exactly what needs to be in your transportation section. Who picks up. Who drops off. Exact addresses. Sick days. No school days. Summer. And whether your psycho ex gets to step onto your property or keeps their ass in the car.
Wanna know the one clause that's about to fuck up every single weekend?
It's that bullshit line: "parents will agree on transportation." Spoiler: you won't agree on a goddamn thing with your narcissistic ex.
Your attorney threw this vague garbage in so you'd keep calling them back. Now you're stuck sending 45 texts every Thursday arguing about where the hell the exchange even is.
Here's what happens: Your ex shows up whenever they feel like it. Claims they didn't know where to go. Says YOU were supposed to drive. Meanwhile, you rearranged everything, and they just... don't show. Then somehow YOU look like the problem because nothing was written down. Gaslighting with a legal loophole.
In this episode, I'm breaking down exactly what needs to be in your transportation section. Who picks up. Who drops off. Exact addresses. Sick days. No school days. Summer. And whether your psycho ex gets to step onto your property or keeps their ass in the car.
These details aren't overkill. This is war strategy. Your ex doesn't want convenience—they want control. Access to your life. To see who you're dating, what's in your driveway. You need to cut off their supply.
Let's close this fucking loop. Let's build a transportation clause that actually works.
Here’s What You Can Actually Take Away:
- Vague Transportation Clauses Create Weekly Wars - When your parenting plan says "parents will agree," you'll spend every exchange arguing about who picks up, who drops off, and where it happens.
- I Plan for Three Exception Scenarios - Sick kids, no-school days, and summer break all eliminate school as an exchange point, so I make sure plans have alternatives for each.
- I Specify Exchange Locations and Conduct - In high conflict cases, I include where exchanges happen, whether parents stay in vehicles, and boundaries about entering property.
- Missed Details Create Expensive Problems - Without clear transportation rules, you'll face missed exchanges with no consequences, late pickups used as leverage, and either more attorney fees or one parent controlling everything.
- I Don't Want You Leaving Holiday Celebrations - Don't leave Christmas dinner to drive kids somewhere because your transportation clause was too vague to specify who picks up.
I Set Property Boundaries in High Conflict Cases - Some exes want to come onto your property to snoop and maintain control. I plan for this reality by setting clear stay-in-vehicle rules.
- When you don't put clear rules around transportation, you argue back and forth, you send 45 messages to each other about 'no, you're the one that's supposed to pick up.'
- I'm not gonna later determine, I am not gonna later figure it out with my ex on where we are going to pick up and drop off.
- Your plan says I have the kids till 8:00 AM, shouldn't the logical next sentence be where do I take them? It's just like completing the whole circle.
- Late pickups are used as leverage to make you watch the kids all day. You have to take the day off work, and then that person will want you to deliver them as if you are a bus.
- Transportation can be tied to a lot of control and not logistics, and I want you to think about that.
- I think we should be picking public places that have a lot of Karens and a lot of cameras like Target or public gas stations.
- Our kids should not be standing there absorbing a pissing match of egos going on in a parking lot.
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