6 Biggest Mistakes When Hiring a Divorce Attorney for a Custody Case
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In this episode I break down the 6 biggest mistakes people make when hiring a divorce attorney for a custody case.
You are out here letting a Facebook comment section pick the person who is supposed to fight for your kids and you do not even see the problem with that.
This episode is one I needed to make because it is coming up constantly with my clients in real time. People are walking into attorney consultations completely unprepared, hiring the wrong person for all the wrong reasons, and then wondering why their case is falling apart. I have been there. Multiple wrong attorneys, years of my life, and more money than I want to think about. I am not letting you make the same mistakes I did.
In this episode I break down the 6 biggest mistakes people make when hiring a divorce attorney for a custody case. We are talking about crowdsourcing your most important legal decision on social media, hiring your friend's attorney without doing any due diligence, picking someone who dabbles in family law instead of living it, only interviewing one attorney and calling it research, hiring a personality instead of a strategy, and waiting until you are already in full blown crisis mode before you hire anyone. Every single one of these mistakes has a cost and that cost usually shows up in your parenting time and your bank account.
I also walk you through 3 of the 7 questions you need to bring into every single attorney consultation before you sign anything or hand over a retainer. The full list of 7 plus a detailed breakdown of every mistake is inside the newsletter. If you are not subscribed yet, fix that today.
The attorney you hire is not your friend. They are not your therapist. They are the person standing between you and losing time with your kids. You need to walk into that consultation room prepared, clear on what you want, and ready to interview them just as hard as they are pitching you. Hire accordingly.
Here’s What You Can Actually Take Away:
- Stop the Social Media Search. Posting in Facebook groups for attorney recommendations is one of the fastest ways to end up with bad advice from people who know nothing about your specific situation.
- Your Friend's Attorney Is Not Your Attorney. No two divorce cases are the same, and the attorney who crushed it for your friend might completely fail you if your cases don't match.
- Family Law Only, Period. You want an attorney who specializes exclusively in family law, not someone who handles estates on Monday and custody on Wednesday.
- Interview More Than One. Comparing at least two to three attorneys gives you perspective, leverage, and the ability to make an informed decision instead of an emotional one.
- Strategy Beats Personality Every Time. Feeling comfortable with your attorney is nice. Having an attorney who can strategically dismantle the other side in court is what actually wins your case.
- Hire Before the Crisis Hits. Waiting until you're in panic mode means you hire fast and wrong. Get ahead of it while you still have the bandwidth to make a smart decision.
- Be the Calm One. Your kid is going to remember which parent made the phone a whole dramatic thing and which parent just said, take it wherever you go, I trust you.
The Truth Bombs
- "This is not your bestie. This is not your therapist. This is your attorney. You are hiring a strategy, not a friendship."
- "Any attorney who sits across from you and tells you they can win your case before they even know who you're divorcing is blowing smoke and wants your retainer check."
- "I got completely bamboozled by marble floors and Dove chocolates. Aesthetics are not a strategy."
- "My last attorney and I did not like each other. But she made my ex fall apart in court, and that is exactly what I needed her for."
"Stop posting in Facebook groups asking for attorney recommendations. You have no idea who is sitting in that comment section." - "Standard parenting plans are written like two people from the 1950s who still live next door and are best friends. Nobody is best friends. Account for that."
- "You walk in emotional, scared, and worried. An attorney makes you feel safe. Great. A therapist can do that too. What you need is someone who will go to war."
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